WONK: the Chaos Reigns Players

[KilroyCD]

Welcome to this week's exciting episode...

Announcer: last week when we left Kilroy and Samantha, they had been rendered unconcious and are being held by German agents in an unknown location...
1st man: Clive, wo bist du? (Clive, where are you?)
Clive: Right here, mate!
1st man: Sprechen Sie Deutsch, dummkopf! Wir wollen sie nicht, uns zu verstehen. (Speak German, you fool! We don't want them to understand us.)
Clive: (Eyes Kilroy) Erbärmlich, wir haben uns auf jenen stupide Piloten ist mit ihr nicht verlassen. (We didn't count on that stupid pilot being with her.)
Kilroy: (Thinking to self) My Lord! It's the barman from the pub!
1st man: Werden wir sie töten? (Shall we kill them?)
Clive: Wir werden sie zur Zebramannschaft übergeben, wenn wir durch mit ihnen sind. (We will hand them over to the Zebra Team when we're through with them.)
Kilroy: Good lord, they'll turn us over to the Zebra Team. I'll bet they don't know I can understand what they're saying. Where's DB when you need him?

 

[retrogirl1941]

(eyeing the men in the corner)
Kilroy, are you awake? Zebra team can't get ahold of us. One encounter was enough. And why did they want me?


Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

Shhh! Yes, I'm awake. Stay mum though, we don't want them to know we understand what they're saying.

 

[retrogirl1941]

(whispering) What if I told them I am a german citizen? That should count for something right? Is'nt that the bartender from the other night?

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

*Whispering* Yes, it is the bartender. Bloody hell, I knew I couldn't trust him. I wouldn't bring your German background into this right now. They know you're working for the British. If anything, it'll get you shot.

 

[retrogirl1941]

I wonder if thats why there after me then? Why did they get you too? I wonder where DB is?(remembering to whisper) OOpps! (covering mouth as the men in the corner look over at kilroy and I, and start walking over).

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

1st man (Looking at Samantha): You mention DB. You vouldn't pe referrink to ze "Diamondback", vould you?
Clive: Diamondback? Why, he was in my pub last evening. He and the redhead came to collect that pilot, who was drunk as a skunk! Jener Rothaarige ist hei?ü! (That redhead is hot!)
1st man (turning to Clive): Diamondback iss in ze area?
Clive: Ja..he is.
1st man: Finden Sie ihn und t??ten Sie ihn! (Find him and kill him!)

 

[retrogirl1941]

(looking over at Clive) I will thank to hold your tongue! I do not like being talked about as if I am not here!

(to kilroy) I hope DB is long gone by now! I feel so awful!

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

1st man (Looking at Samantha): Zo, you know German, do you? *Glares at Clive* Clive, heraus! (Out!)
Clive: Jawohl, mein herr! (Yes sir!) *Clicks heels, turns and leaves room.*
1st man (to Samantha): Zo, vhat can you tell me about ze Diamondback?
*Just then, a rather large character enters the room*
1st man: Ah, Ahnold! Velcome. As you zee, ve haff zome visitors.
*Arnold sees Samantha, and barely disguises the look of shock on his face*
Arnold: Goot mornink!
Kilroy (Thinking to himself): Good Lord, Arnold is on their side? I wonder if DB knows?

 

[retrogirl1941]

I will not tell you anything. I don;t want to put him in anymore danger than I already have! (looking over at arnold and realized they misjudged him) Yes I can speak german.
"Entschuldigen Sie bitte, aber ich bin ein B?ºrger Deutsch"
(Excuse me but I am a german citizen)
You have to let me go this instant!

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

*Thinking to myself* Can she dig us into any deeper of a hole?
*Whispering to Samantha* Why did you just do that? Now we're likely in real sheep dit!"
1st man: Stille, du stupide piloten Engelander! (Silence, you stupid English pilot!) *Turns to Arnold* Wir m?ºssen vom englischen Piloten befreit werden.
(We'll have to get rid of the English pilot.)
Arnold: Nein! Wir werden sie benutzen, Diamondback zu uns anzulocken. (No! We will use them to lure Diamondback to us.)

 

[Diamondback]

Meanwhile, at SHAPE in Britain...
(camera: we see Diamondback/Bourne in full dress uniform, approaching Ike's office. General Bedell Smith hastily moves to head off the intruder...)
Bedell, get out of my way--I have to see Ike, it's urgent and I'm in no mood to play with you right now...
Gen. Smith: Forget it, not happening. Even if Ike were here...
*pulling out Taser, electrodes crackle* Oh, Bedell, don't make me do this again... you remember what happened las--
(camera pans slightly over DB/B's shoulder, we see Ike approaching)
Gen. Eisenhower: All right, son, put it away. You need some of my time so bad, you've got it. But not here, somewhere more secure... Follow me. *Ike starts to walk off, DB/B in tow*

 

[retrogirl1941]

(whispering to kilroy) I thought it would help! I'm trying to get us out of here!

(talking to the german) I demand you let me go! I'm sure your boss would not want a german citizen harmed!


Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

1st man: Mein boss vould not zhink anyzhing about harmink a traitor!
Kilroy: ah, if you'll permit me to speak, I have an idea.
1st man: Oh really? Vhat do you haff in mind?
Kilroy: Well, we could negotiate a trade, so to speak. You could free us in return for, say... Rudolf Hess?
1st man: Ve don't vant him back!

 

[retrogirl1941]

(whispering to kilroy) Right that worked!Good job!(talking to german) Why is it you needed to capture me anyways? And if its only me you need , why not just let kilroy go? He won't do any harm.

Samantha

 

[Diamondback]

SHAPE Top Floor Men's Restroom
Gen. Eisenhower: Okay, Diamondback or Bourne or whatever your name is, what was so important that you came storming in here ready to electrocute Bedell?
Sir, a couple members of my team have been abducted by Jerry, and I need to ask for someone's assistance in getting them back. Someone who's been all but blackballed here... I have an idea for one heck of a mind-screwing psychological-warfare op as part of the job, and only the best will do...
DB/B and Ike, in stereo: Patton.

 

[KilroyCD]

1st man: *Muttering to self* Ach du liebe! *Turns to Samantha* Ve haff no interest in small fish like you. Ve are lookink for ze Diamondback, und Carter. Ve know ve can get to zem through you. You mean nossink to us. Vonce ve're done vis you, ve vill turn you ofer to ze Zebra Team. Zenn your real troubles vill begin...

 

[retrogirl1941]

But I dont know were my father is or Db for that matter! You won't get any information from me or kilroy! Try your hardest!

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

1st man: Vee haff vays to make you talk! (I'fe alvays vanted to use zhat line).
Kilroy: Samantha, I believe you've already given them too much information.
1st man: Zo, you zhink you can keep from talkink, huh?
Kilroy: Name: Kilroy, C.D. Rank: Squadron Leader. Serial number: 234765.

 

[retrogirl1941]

Did'nt you just tell me to be quiet a minute ago kilroy? I dont get you! One minute you want this and the next...... ah!

Samantha