WONK: the Chaos Reigns Players

[KilroyCD]

Clive: Are you two looking for Squadron Leader Kilroy? I believe he's under that chair.
*Kilroy stands up, wobbling and brushes himself off* Hey! *hic* I'm not under the alcofluence of incohol like some thinkle peep I am! *hic* Oh heck , okay, I'm blotto. *hic* Hell, I'm nearly legless! *falls down again*

 

[Diamondback]

Well, when a guy gets involved with a girl and things don't seem to be working, it can be awful devastating... as you already saw once tonight. See, when a guy likes a girl and she likes him, we're on top of the world, but when it's not mutual we're absolutely crushed.

[booming voice]MAJOR Kilroy!

Holy crap, did that come out of me?

 

[retrogirl1941]

Db can you help me get him to the cab? I can't hel blaming myself for this, maybe if I..... or if.....I must not as good of a person as you think I am if I cause this(pointing to kilroy, tears falling down my cheeks).

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

Huh? Wha...who's...*hic* major? I'm majorly leg....*hic* legless, if that's...*hic* that's what you mean.

 

[Diamondback]

*works Kilroy's arm over shoulder*

No, my instincts are never wrong about people--this happens every day, all over the world. I've seen it hundreds of times before... Don't blame yourself, it's a design flaw in human nature.

 

[KilroyCD]

*Clive to DB and Sam* Do go easy on him, won't you? Thanks for fetching him. I was wondering what I'd have to do at closing time.

 

[retrogirl1941]

I never see the pain I cause I usualy run before it hits the fan.(helping kilroy into cab). I still think its time for a scenary change, maybe ireland would be nice or even new york! There are burlesque houses aplenty there. I'm sure they could use a new act.

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

*hic* Where are...are *hic* we going? Let me go, I can wal...*hic* walk! I'm not...*hic* not totally leg...*hic* legless! *Falls to ground* I didn't *hic* didn't just fall *hic* down, did I?

 

[Diamondback]

Yeah, but there are a lot of guys who do the same thing--and sometimes, those early pains are indicators that a relationship's growing...

lol Listen to this, me giving advice to the heartsick--when the closest thing to a date I've ever had was my boss at the college paper asking me to go to a dance with her as her bodyguard...

 

[retrogirl1941]

Kilroy, Get in the cab now!I have a midnight train to catch and I will not miss it on account of you unable to hold your alcohol!
(gets into cab and starts tapping foot)

samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

Aye *hic* aye, skipper! *Turns to DB* Who is this Admiral anyway? *passes out*

 

[Diamondback]

*shoves Kilroy into cab, slams door and hops in*

Squadron Leader, I'd say you have some serious butt-kissing to do... who knows what the lady spared you from back there? I know she's already saved my life tonight...

 

[retrogirl1941]

Ok I have to get back and finish packing my bags. I will take this cab you two get your own unless you get in this cab in the next two secounds!

Samantha

 

[Diamondback]

We're in! Driver, GO!

*enroute back to base, cab passes ruins of what used to be the local train station*

 

[KilroyCD]

Oh, looky! They got the train sta...sta...sta...*hic* shun too!

 

[retrogirl1941]

*fast forward to next morning*(waking up) Oh did I miss my stop? (sitting up) Oh Kilroy made me miss my train! Darn that pilot! Why would he do that?

Samantha

 

[Diamondback]

Sam, it's a good thing you missed your train--last night something hit the train station just as you would've been boarding. Total loss... After getting you and Kilroy back here, I spent the night triaging the wounded.

*falls flat on face, exhausted*

 

[KilroyCD]

*Wakes up in quarters* Oh, good Lord, my aching head! *Hears clock ticking* Will you quit ticking so loudly!
...Oh my gosh, what the bloody heck! Oh, Lord, I must have been positively legless last evening. Where was I? How did I get back here? Was I singing Mairsey Dotes?

 

[retrogirl1941]

(Runs over to db and turns him over and places pillow under his head)Are you ok? Is this another sympton of what-cha-call-it, disease?
And how did I get to my room without any recollection?
Samantha

 

[Diamondback]

[slurred voice]No, this is a symptom of no sleep... I tell you, some of the stuff I saw last night was just awful. Right now, I wish I were as drunk as Kilroy was last night, maybe it'd help me forget... How you got there? I carried you, then dragged Kilroy to his room.