WONK: the Chaos Reigns Players

[KilroyCD]

*Walks in on Samantha placing pillow under DB's head* Good morn...what's going on here? Now I know why I went and got blotto! Why don't you two just go get a room somewhere? *Turns and walks out of room*

 

[retrogirl1941]

(fighting the urge to hug DB) But how did I miss my train last night? I can't remmeber most of the cab ride or when we got in.....


Samantha

 

[retrogirl1941]

*Walks in on Samantha placing pillow under DB's head* Good morn...what's going on here? Now I know why I went and got blotto! Why don't you two just go get a room somewhere? *Turns and walks out of room*

Kilory wait!(runs after kilroy) Db fell and I was making sure he was ok. Are you mad at me for being a caring individual?

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

Caring, HAH! You knew... you know I care for you! I risked my life to save you from behind enemy lines! I took a bullet for you! And this is the thanks I get? Just go and tend to Colonel Diamondback.
*Grumbling* I don't know about this... I'm the C.O. and I suddenly find out I'm the junior officer...in more ways than one!

 

[Diamondback]

*groggily looks up, noticing Kilroy stomping off* Uuuugh, what's wrong with him?

*lightbulb*
Sam, problem. He thinks we're what might be termed, in my time, an "item"... unfortunately, it's obvious it could never work between us.

Do me a favor?

 

[retrogirl1941]

Caring, HAH! You knew... you know I care for you! I risked my life to save you from behind enemy lines! I took a bullet for you! And this is the thanks I get? Just go and tend to Colonel Diamondback.
*Grumbling* I don't know about this... I'm the C.O. and I suddenly find out I'm the junior officer...in more ways than one!

I did'nt ask you to save me! I did'nt ask to take a bullet or anything for me! Why don't you go out and get your self plastered again. (talking to self)I do still care for you kilroy, I'm sorry.

Samantha

 

[retrogirl1941]

*groggily looks up, noticing Kilroy stomping off* Uuuugh, what's wrong with him?

*lightbulb*
Sam, problem. He thinks we're what might be termed, in my time, an "item"... unfortunately, it's obvious it could never work between us.

Do me a favor?

Yeah I guess. Wait why would'nt it work between us? Oh wiat don't bother giving some doublespeak answer though.

Samantha

 

[Diamondback]

*sees Kilroy and Sam outside hearing range, struggles over to emergency toolkit and opens it*

Okay, gonna have to do this myself...

*camera: we see a huge syringe, labeled "LIQUID CAFFEINE, 100%"*

 

[KilroyCD]

I did'nt ask you to save me! I did'nt ask to take a bullet or anything for me! Why don't you go out and get your self plastered again.

Well, if I had known then what I know now, I wouldn't have! But I'll tell you one thing, if I hadn't staged that raid, you'd probably be dead by now!
*Turns away* Darned women, there's no pleasing them...

 

[retrogirl1941]

Well, if I had known then what I know now, I wouldn't have! But I'll tell you one thing, if I hadn't staged that raid, you'd probably be dead by now!
*Turns away* Darned women, there's no pleasing them...

(falls to floor of hallway and starts crying and continues to sit there)Maybe I want to be dead......(buries head in hands)


Samantha

 

[Diamondback]

*looks up, sees Sam*
The favor is, stick me with this--I'm gonna crash twice as hard when it wears off, but this'll keep me going for the next two days straight.

As for why it can't work, it's a matter of times--right now, my grandmother hasn't even graduated from high-school, and I'm not sure about how well an "inter-time" relationship would work... I mean, I'm attracted to you--the problem is, right now my head and my heart are having an argument that makes Bourne and I look like a conversation over crumpets and tea by comparison... *we see a tear in DB's eye, dripping out from behind the shades on one side*

 

[retrogirl1941]

(walks away and out the door and to the trian station, sitting on bench) Oh I wish everything was normal. I want all this pian to disapear.(sees two shadowy figures out of the corner of my eye)

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

*Approaches Sam sitting on the bench*
Oh, come on now, you don't think a few tears is going to make me feel any differently....
*Looks down at Sam, sitting there, sobbing.*
All right, all right...
*Sits down next to her, pulls out handkerchief*
I think you might need this. Come on, lets go somewhere and talk. We're both emotionally drained right now, and being at each other's throats isn't going to help things.

 

[retrogirl1941]

(takes hankercheif from kilroy) Well.... I guess....maybe.....(someone soaked his hanky in cloroform)..... kilroy .... you still here? (sliding off bench to ground passed out)

Samantha

 

[KilroyCD]

What the...? *Grabs handkerchief and sniffs* My God, someone put chlor...*passes out*

 

[Diamondback]

*DB has a vision of Samantha in danger*

Umm, OK, here goes, always hated this part...

*sticks self with syringe, pumping 500mg of raw caffeine into carotid artery, then yanks syringe out*

Where'd everybody go?

*hotwires jeep, races back to ruins of train station*

 

[KilroyCD]

*I wake up in a big room, and I don't know where Samantha and I are. We're both handcuffed to each other, sitting back-to-back. On the wall is a large framed print of Der Fuehrer*
Samantha, are you awake?

 

[retrogirl1941]

*We wake up in a big room, Samantha and I don't know where we are. We're both handcuffed to each other, sitting with hands behind our back. On the wall is a large framed print of Der Fuehrer*
Samantha, are you awake?

Kilroy(disoreinted), where are we? I.... remember..... you and..... me and......(passes out)

Samantha

 

[Diamondback]

*arrives at train station just in time to see a large black car racing away; traffic prevents pursuit*

[radio]Blackout, tell me you're tracking that ugly black car I just missed, please?

*starts drive back to base*

A few minutes later...
*all hands on base are assembled in a large briefing-room*
[speech]: "Ladies and gentlemen, I'm Colonel Bourne, U.S. Army, seconded to Office of Strategic Services, Division Six. You've seen me around the base and Hangar 18, perhaps even wondered why that hangar is such a big deal and you've been warned to stay away under penalty of being shot on sight. Now you're about to find out a little of its secrets...
Some piece of sauerkraut crap has abducted Squadron Leader Kilroy, and I am taking command of this installation and everyone and everything on it to get him back here and to his rightful place. Got a problem, take it up with Ike... meantime, I intend to organize a rescue mission as soon as I have even the faintest idea of his whereabouts, using every resource at my command and any means necessary.

WHO'S WITH ME?!"

 

[KilroyCD]

Announcer: The Chaos Reigns Players will hopefully return next week with another mind-numbing misadventure:

Will Kilroy and Samantha ever be found?
Will Kilroy and Samantha's Nazi captors turn them over to the Zebra Team?
Will Kilroy and Samantha finally reconcile?
Will Kilroy get blotto again if they don't?
Will Samantha turn to burlesque if they don't?
Will Diamondback get enough volunteers to try a rescue mission? (After all, Kilroy has been a spot of bother to them lately...)
Will Diamondback consume enough caffeine to keep him awake during the mission?
Will Diamondback survive his promotion to Colonel?
Will Clive (the Barman) be able to replenish his supply of scotch?
Will we ever get to see Carter?
Will we have cameos from Dostacos, zaika, MNC and Dash?
Will everyone else get legless like Kilroy?


TUNE IN NEXT TIME To WONK for the answers to these and many other nonsensical questions, when the Chaos Reigns Players continue the saga of The Rescue of the Two Cabooses Plus Multiple Milos or How I Saved the Train With a Plane But Lost My Mind To Porridge.

(We are not responsible for the inconclusivity of the aforementioned conclusion.)

Inspired by Marc Chevalier from a post by Carter derived from a photo posted by Salv.

This Evening's Cast - Samantha, Diamondback, KilroyCD, "Clive" and "Blackout"


This Threadcast was posted live at the Studios of the Fedora Lounge.

Our Thanks to MK and the Bartenders for their Understanding and Forebearance.