Bad Table Manners

[Feng_Li]

After grillin' sir. The cooks would most assuredly have "marinaded" and "rubbed" (with spices) the meat, this is wear the "flavor art" would come in. Otherwise it would simply be roasted.

I assumed that was what you meant, but one never knows. My father, for example, refuses to allow his steak to touch anything but the grill.

 

[Lily Powers]

...What is really inexplicable is flossing in public. Has anybody else seen this?

Yes! And the scary part was that she was driving a minivan down the freeway while she was doing it! Steering with her forearms. No doubt on her way to a fine dining establishment where she would exhibit further disregard for manners and common sense.

 

[Foofoogal]

If it was a valuable lesson, why would you not advocate it??? Your friends who went wild would have had a better understanding of the need for moderation had they had your valuable experience.

Ok, let me try to explain this. I would not advocate it because in some states it is illegal to offer alcohol to minors that are not the persons children and I have had run ins with some who do not understand this. This was another time and place. Around late 1960s.
I am a teetotaler mostly now due to several factors but every once in awhile I will drink a glass of wine if it does not have sulfites.
Our grandchildren at their parents discretion do allow a bit of this at special times.
It is a nonissue as they have a large responsible support system but I would not openly suggest this to anyone as I am not sure how it would be handled.
Not sure if this makes any sense.
(I am not talking about slinging a beer at a 12 year old to teach them this lesson.) Some would I am sure take what I said as this.
I am not advocating either parents having parties for their children and letting other peoples children drink at said party. Unless one wants to lose their home and everything they own.
Hope this makes sense.

 

[Talbot]

As for the rest of the party using the mustard, I can only surmise that they did it to be polite as: Skeet has said most eloquently. I can think of no other reason for their behavior. I would say you found extremely polite, gracious, and adventurous partners and friends. I'd keep 'um if I was you.

Yes, after posting I wondered about that also.

Cody, all is good. These Texans are fine people, and I am fortunate enough to be god parent to one of thier kids, so we get on well.

I hosted some of them down under, and after the spiders, snakes, jellyfishes, and wildlife in general they left muttering something about Chupacabra's and not getting caught in Oakcliff after dark. Another possible gaffe on my part?

I was taught that the 'correct' way to apply salt was to place a small pile on your plate and dip your food in it, as per the great mustard debacle.

I have only seen very correct old timers do this, can anyone advise?

 

["Skeet" McD]

Ok, let me try to explain this. I would not advocate it because in some states it is illegal to offer alcohol to minors that are not the persons children...It is a nonissue as they have a large responsible support system but I would not openly suggest this to anyone as I am not sure how it would be handled...Hope this makes sense.

Yes, eminent sense and a well-thought out defense of your original statement. You witnessed to your own experience, and acknowledged that circumstances (and parental choices, as well as laws) will differ.

Well done, IMHO
"Skeet"

 

[bobalooba]

if I'm having trouble focusing, I just set the phone down for a minute.

That's the problem is people don't even notice sometimes and get totally absorbed in their text-athons. Kudos for realizing putting your phone down isn't a mortal sin.

 

[Mid-fogey]

Marc...

...insist your daughter practice good table manners as early as she is able to understand. It's not negotiable.

My daughter is ten and she has very good table manners. Both my wife and I enforce it. We set the table with a full set of flatware even if we don't intend to use a particular piece for that meal. We eat dinner as a family every night, even if it is a quick and simple meal. We want her to be effortlessly familiar with the proper uses of each utensil. Of course, we have to remind and continue to teach her, but she is doing well.

Her good manners and proper use of utensils has inadvertently embarrassed friends and acquaintances with similarly aged children. There's Ginny eating like a well mannered adult and the contrast causes the other parents to feel bad (rightly) and apologize for their child.

I'm the son of an Army officer. My folks were expected to entertain, and do it with taste and manners. Military people were so noted for formal entertaining that there is such a thing as an "Army-Navy tablecloth". Officers were expected to acquire sterling silver flatware, china, and crystal. You were expected to extend and accept invitations and show exemplary table manners. West Point, Annapolis, VMI, The Citadel, and all the other old line military schools drilled table manners too.

I read a newspaper article a few years ago that said that so many new college graduates looking for their first jobs had humiliated themselves at luncheon interviews that some schools were providing table etiquette lessons.

Table manners matter. Scoffing or kidding yourself doesn't change that a bit.

 

[Marc Chevalier]

I certainly will, Mid-fogey. Thanks!


Back in the early '60s, my father was a lieutenant JG on the brand new U.S.S. Kitty Hawk, then the largest oceangoing vessel in the world. (It's an aircraft carrier.) In his time, all officers were always served at table by uniformed enlisted men. The tables had linen, sterling silverware, the works.


Fast forward to today: the U.S.S. Kitty Hawk is being decommissioned. As a former officer from the ship's first cruise, my father was invited to spend a few days on board for its final voyage. To his disappointment, he discovered that officers today stand in line, cafeteria-style, for their dinner; the linens and sterling silverware are long gone, as are the waiters.


.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

That's the problem is people don't even notice sometimes and get totally absorbed in their text-athons. Kudos for realizing putting your phone down isn't a mortal sin.

Yeah, some people aren't multi-taskers. I've gotten pretty good with time, but that's from practice, practice, practice. Now! I would NEVER text during family dinner or anything, I don't care what it is, if it's a text message, it's not that big of a deal that it can't wait until after supper. If it's that pressing of a problem, somebody can feel free to call me. If I see someone texting at the dinner table, it's just the textbook definition of poor manners.

 

[Lady Jessica]

Yeah, some people aren't multi-taskers. I've gotten pretty good with time, but that's from practice, practice, practice. Now! I would NEVER text during family dinner or anything, I don't care what it is, if it's a text message, it's not that big of a deal that it can't wait until after supper. If it's that pressing of a problem, somebody can feel free to call me. If I see someone texting at the dinner table, it's just the textbook definition of poor manners.

Agreed! My mom texts at dinner and it drives me crazy. I don't do that, at least.

Even if I do sword-fight at the dinner table.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

Agreed! My mom texts at dinner and it drives me crazy. I don't do that, at least.

Even if I do sword-fight at the dinner table.

LOL, I can visualize that! "On Guard!!" We just shout a lot, politics is a big discussion at the dinner table, and we're a loud bunch, and usually Glenn Beck is on the tube, makes for an interesting dinner.

 

[Lady Jessica]

LOL, I can visualize that! "On Guard!!" We just shout a lot, politics is a big discussion at the dinner table, and we're a loud bunch, and usually Glenn Beck is on the tube, makes for an interesting dinner.

I'm quite good, we used to play out back when I was a young kid. I could beat anyone in the neighborhood. I like to talk, but only with people I'm comfortable with. If I'm not comfortable, I'll stare at my plate or maybe read (but not at a table, at lunch I eat on the floor in this room at my school). I read when I eat breakfast alone, though.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

I'm quite good, we used to play out back when I was a young kid. I could beat anyone in the neighborhood. I like to talk, but only with people I'm comfortable with. If I'm not comfortable, I'll stare at my plate or maybe read (but not at a table, at lunch I eat on the floor in this room at my school). I read when I eat breakfast alone, though.

I was never a sword guy, so you'd kick my butt haha. I was a gun guy. I read or watch TV a lot when I eat. Usually Car Magazines, and I always watch Bachelor Father or Leave it to Beaver during breakfast. I graduated High School this January, but when I was still in school, usually didn't eat at lunch, walked to the gas station to have a Cigar break with my friends.

 

[Widebrim]

Fork and knife

If I'm correct, the idea of putting your knife down after using it to cut food, goes back to the mid-19th century. Wives became weary of their husbands cutting their food, stabbing it with a fork, and stuffing it in their mouths, and then immediately repeating the process. Having them place the knife on the edge of the plate (or wherever) supposedly slowed down the process, and made the men's eating habits more "civil." I personally keep the knife in hand while I use the fork for the second and third steps...

 

[Miss Neecerie]

1. Always leave room for people's glasses
2. Don't hog the whole table....
3. Remember to set the alarm clock.
4. flowers are always a nice touch


oh wait...this said -bad- table manners.....not bed table manners.:eusa_doh:

 

[FinalVestige79]

Well...

I was never taught it, and around the age of 9 I had enough and changed my habits, my father...is the worst.

 

[Talbot]

When holding a wine glass...

...is it 'correct' etiquette to hold it by the stem or the bowl?

 

[Lady Jessica]

I was taught to hold it by the bowl... same with champagne glasses.

 

[Marc Chevalier]

With chilled white wine, I reckon that it's held by the stem ... in order to not warm the contents. (Actually, I have no idea!)

.

 

[Vintage Betty]

With chilled white wine, I reckon that it's held by the stem ... in order to not warm the contents. (Actually, I have no idea!)

.

When I went wine tasting in Napa, that's what the vintners said too.

Vintage Betty