Bring back dating?

[reetpleat]

I think this is the very reason most of us found this forum and enjoy it. We don't share a lot of the "values" that the modern world tries to shove down our throats.
I have seen many people get burned, and I've been burned a few times myself by not taking my time and just rushing into a relationship. So it's not something I take lightly, not just for my sake, but for the sake of whoever else might ultimately be involved.
To each their own, but I'll take my time,...patience is a virtue. [angel]

Hey, something we agree on.

While my tastes for the vintage are strictly aesthetic (I in no way associate them with values of the era. Any interest in any given traditional value is merely a choice divorced from my enjoyment of vintage clothes, cars, movies or whatever) I do agree with you in not wanting to jump into a relationship.

that is why I "date" for lack of a better term. And yes, I do partake in certain adult association as part of that dating. But I am not interested in jumping into anything too quickly.

While I do not suggest young people be promiscuous, I do agree that they should not be too quick to go steady or whatever.

 

[reetpleat]

Lets be realistic, "the hookup" is simply a nicer word than "one night stand".

Think about it, "the hookup" sounds like there may be a chance to continue the relationship in a "sex in the city" kind of way where you sit around with your buddies and pull the entire thing apart, examine the partner in the most scientific way to find out what might happen, his/her motives blah blah blah, will he call me, should I call him in four days, is that too early????

Ahhhh the mighty one night stand....you meet, make whoopee go home,never see each other again..... so much simpler!

I don't think there is much difference. They are both euphemisms for intimacy without a relationship.

But a hook up, or a one night stand is merely one phone call away from the start of a beautiful friendship.

I am not so sure many people go out with the express intent of not getting involved with someone they like and can also sleep with.

Many relationships start that way. Others have a date or two before the deed, and keep dating. A person can wait six months, then sleep together and decide to discontinue.

 

[Lincsong]

And why is it that some women get mad if their husbands watch MTV????

 

[Steve]

Personally, I've seen too many dating relationships break up to want to be a part of it. I admired one girl from afar for seven years, and she had a boyfriend for a lot of the time. After everyone had heard about "how serious" they were getting, they broke up and she's on to the next fellow. And that fellow, who happens to be a good friend of mine, just came out of an equally "serious" relationship with some girl whose footprints he worshiped.

As a semi-professional outside observer of human behavior, I drew nothing from seeing all of that except cynicism.

 

[carebear]

Personally, I've seen too many dating relationships break up to want to be a part of it. I admired one girl from afar for seven years, and she had a boyfriend for a lot of the time. After everyone had heard about "how serious" they were getting, they broke up and she's on to the next fellow. And that fellow, who happens to be a good friend of mine, just came out of an equally "serious" relationship with some girl whose footprints he worshiped.

As a semi-professional outside observer of human behavior, I drew nothing from seeing all of that except cynicism.

I'm a hopeful serial monogamist. I do believe I've had my first love, and I think I messed up my great love. I'm afraid of missing my last love.

Pink Floyd

Was is love? Or the idea of being in love? That seemed to fit just like a glove?

Foo Fighters

Done, done, and I'm on to the next one

Roger Clyne

I keep my eyes wide to see, the next, future ex-, Mrs. Me

 

[Dan G]

fftopic: Pink Floyd is awesome and that album was my favorite.:whistling

edit: Is my favorite Floyd album!

 

[koopkooper]

rules for dating my daughter

10 SIMPLE RULES FOR DATING MY DAUGHTER

Rule One:
If you pull into my driveway and honk you'd better be delivering a package, because you're sure not picking anything up.

Rule Two:
You do not touch my daughter in front of me. You may glance at her, so long as you do not peer at anything below her neck. If you cannot keep your eyes or hands off of my daughter's body, I will remove them.

Rule Three:
I am aware that it is considered fashionable for boys of your age to wear their trousers so loosely that they appear to be falling off their hips. Please don't take this as an insult, but you and all of your friends are complete idiots. Still, I want to be fair and open minded about this issue, so I propose this compromise: You may come to the door with your underwear showing and your pants ten sizes too big, and I will not object. However, in order to ensure that your clothes do not, in fact, come off during the course of your date with my daughter, I will take my electric nail gun and fasten your trousers securely in place to your waist.

Rule Four:
I'm sure you've been told that in today's world, sex without utilizing a "barrier method" of some kind can kill you. Let me elaborate, when it comes to sex, I am the barrier, and I will kill you.

Rule Five:
It is usually understood that in order for us to get to know each other, we should talk about sports, politics, and other issues of the day. Please do not do this. The only information I require from you is an indication of when you expect to have my daughter safely back at my house, and the only word I need from you on this subject is "early."

Rule Six:
I have no doubt you are a popular fellow, with many opportunities to date other girls. This is fine with me as long as it is okay with my daughter. Otherwise, once you have gone out with my little girl, you will continue to date no one but her until she is finished with you. If you make her cry, I will make you cry.

Rule Seven:
As you stand in my front hallway, waiting for my daughter to appear, and more than an hour goes by, do not sigh and fidget. If you want to be on time for the movie, you should not be dating. My daughter is putting on her makeup, a process that can take longer than painting the Golden Gate Bridge. Instead of just standing there, why don't you do something useful, like changing the oil in my car?

Rule Eight:
The following places are not appropriate for a date with my daughter: Places where there are beds, sofas, or anything softer than a wooden stool. Places where there are no parents, policemen, or nuns within eyesight. Places where there is darkness. Places where there is dancing, holding hands, or happiness. Places where the ambient temperature is warm enough to induce my daughter to wear shorts, tank tops, midriff T-shirts, or anything other than overalls, a sweater, and a goose down parka -- zipped up to her throat. Movies with a strong romantic or sexual theme are to be avoided; movies which features chain saws are okay. Hockey games are okay. Old folks homes are better.

Rule Nine:
Do not lie to me. I may appear to be a potbellied, balding, middle-aged, dimwitted has-been. But on issues relating to my daughter, I am the all-knowing, merciless God of your universe. If I ask you where you are going and with whom, you have one chance to tell me the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth. I have a shotgun, a shovel, and five acres behind the house. Do not trifle with me.

Rule Ten:
Be afraid. Be very afraid. It takes very little for me to mistake the sound of your car in the driveway for a chopper coming in over a rice paddy near Hanoi. When my Agent Orange starts acting up, the voices in my head frequently tell me to clean the guns as I wait for you to bring my daughter home. As soon as you pull into the driveway you should exit your car with both hands in plain sight. Speak the perimeter password, announce in a clear voice that you have brought my daughter home safely and early, then return to your car -- there is no need for you to come inside. The camouflaged face at the window is mine.

 

[Viola]

Why is waiting for marriage an "extreme"? There are plenty of ways one can show affection for his/her significant other without going "all the way." I have known women (not particularly religious ones, either) who share my desire to "wait." I take offense to the implication that men, or women for that matter, are somehow maladjusted or aberrant for waiting until marriage to have sexual intercourse. I do not judge anyone for being sexually adventurous, but it is not for me, and I resent the suggestion that holding on to my virginity pigeonholes me into some sort of "freaks and geeks" category.

It is not a moral extreme. It is a behavioral extreme of the dating spectrum that I was juxtiposing with "Hi, I'm Viola, I like Chinese food, vintage clothing, and guns. Wanna do it?" which is another behavioral extreme that I'm not terribly interested in.

I do not believe waiting for marriage is maladjusted or aberrant. I do not believe one-night-stands are, either.

I don't think either are freakish. Everything's about finding what's right for the individual. I specified I was only talking about me, not casting aspersions.

-Viola

 

[Lincsong]

Koop; One Word;

:eusa_clap BRAVO!:

 

[carebear]

It is not a moral extreme. It is a behavioral extreme of the dating spectrum that I was juxtiposing with "Hi, I'm Viola, I like Chinese food, vintage clothing, and guns. Wanna do it?" ...-Viola

Yes.

Oh wait, that was a rhetorical example...

Never mind.

 

[Marc Chevalier]

Why is waiting for marriage an "extreme"?

Waiting for Godot: now that's extreme ...

.

 

[reetpleat]

Personally, I've seen too many dating relationships break up to want to be a part of it. I admired one girl from afar for seven years, and she had a boyfriend for a lot of the time. After everyone had heard about "how serious" they were getting, they broke up and she's on to the next fellow. And that fellow, who happens to be a good friend of mine, just came out of an equally "serious" relationship with some girl whose footprints he worshiped.

As a semi-professional outside observer of human behavior, I drew nothing from seeing all of that except cynicism.

I just don't understand that at all. You are saying you don't want to date because it might end? Do you refuse to get a job because you might get fired?

NOt every relationship lasts for ever. But that is not reason not to get in one. They may well have enjoyed their relationship, but decided to move on. They might both look back fondly on their past relationships. I do. BUt are now in a new one. What is the problem.

 

[Viola]

Yes.

Oh wait, that was a rhetorical example...

Never mind.

But I don't even know where you stand on the Chinese food issue!lol

-Viola

 

[BegintheBeguine]

I just don't understand that at all. You are saying you don't want to date because it might end? Do you refuse to get a job because you might get fired?

NOt every relationship lasts for ever. But that is not reason not to get in one. They may well have enjoyed their relationship, but decided to move on. They might both look back fondly on their past relationships. I do. BUt are now in a new one. What is the problem.

My friend has been hurt so badly she feels this way. She has given up on dating, men, the whole schmear. It's too bad but people really do act on this.

 

[panamag8or]

I tried the date thing. A couple trips to diners for coffee, one time a movie, and then a trip to the Philadelphia Art Museum. I figured what the hell, told the girl I'm dressing to the nines for the trip, threw on my brown Herringbone 3 button 1943 suit, yellow shirt with dark stripes, red deco tie. Walking around the Modern Art section some random girl walks up to me and says "excuse me, but you look awesome." I said my thanks and was on my way. Driving home I said to my date "You're kind of quiet, jealous of my compliment." To which she replies " I don't need a costume to get compliments."
That was the end of that. I have no idea what provoked that. She's both gone to my parties dressed up and out to breakfast with big groups of my friends and knows that this is what I do. Anyhow, in my experience, trying this dating thing did not work out too well. Maybe it was the suit or the hat or just me.

I'd say it was her.

 

[carebear]

But I don't even know where you stand on the Chinese food issue!lol

-Viola

Wherever you want me to.

 

[missjo]

I decide how i get my men, not society!
Lol, more then a few times men would try to chat me up only to discover that I was expecting them to court me the old fashioned way.
If they didnt, i knew they werent my type anyway.
Ive always been old fashioned and most men i met thought that was quite fun and interesting.
They had to do some work before they even got me crazy enough to go out to diner with them.
The thrill of the hunt lol

Then again, when they discover im wearing original stockings they will pretty much go trough hell and back for a date.
If I wanted them to court me 15th century style and slay me a dragon first, they probably would

But since im into the retro scene its suddenly a lot easier, all the men I meet are interested in the things im interested in, we like the same music, have the same sort of old fashioned ideas (or pretend to have), they usually wear uniforms and they wouldnt mind at all to live in a completely 1930s furnitured house.
And once you had a Retro man, regular modern guys simply dont do it for me anymore.

Am i bad?
Nah im just drawn that way

 

[Rosie]

I'd say it was her.

I don't think it was her. I would be a bit offended if my date inferred I was jealous of a compliment someone paid him. I mean really.

 

[Etienne]

while I think for younger girls, having sex or physical intimacy is not always a good thing because they are often doing it to get intimacy and relationship, so they end up getting hurt. Older men and women are more straightforward and honest about it. I hope. So I think younger girls should be cautioned against hooking up for the wrong reasons.

I'm a bit confused about this statement...If intimacy and relationship are the wrong reasons, what are the "right reasons"?

 

[Marc Chevalier]

I'm a bit confused about this statement...If intimacy and relationship are the wrong reasons, what are the "right reasons"?

Um, physical pleasure? To see fireworks? To have a heck of a lot of fun?

.