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You know you are getting old when:

Messages
10,933
Location
My mother's basement
I just received a used paperback I was eagerly awaiting, and the pages seem to be filled with tiny ant footprints rather than writing. I would need a magnifying glass to read this book.
I’ve worn spectacles since age 15, bifocals since age 30-something, and just a couple weeks ago I purchased three pairs of readers, so that there will likely always be a pair within reach of where I do most of my reading. I remind myself that my age-related complaints are as nothing in comparison to what so many people of my acquaintance have faced/are facing. And it’s not that I’m without my health challenges.
 
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GHT

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,777
Location
New Forest
I’ve worn spectacles since age 15, bifocals since age 30-something, and just a couple weeks ago I purchased three pairs of readers, so that there will likely always be a pair within reach of where I do most of my reading. I remind myself that my age-related complaints are as nothing in comparison to what so many people of my acquaintance have faced/are facing. And it’s not that I’m without my health challenges.
In my mid twenties my wife commented that when I focus on a distance object my bottom eyelids move inwards towards my nose, it was the best way to focus. She had me off to the opticians where I discovered that I had a very common, shortsighted problem.

A pair of specs, a considerable wad from my wallet, problem solved. The optician did say that as I age there would come a time when the microscopic shrinkage of my body would negate the need for glasses. The optician was right, only that shrinkage gave me about a year of being free of glasses. Now I need them for reading! It really does suck, this getting old malarkey.
 
Messages
10,933
Location
My mother's basement
^^^^^^
I had a bout of uveitis going on 20 years ago. The treatment involved steroids (drops and injections, which sounds worse than it is) which resulted in cataracts which was itself addressed by an artificial intraocular lens which corrected the vision in that eye such that I no longer needed spectacles to drive legally. But I wear glasses anyway, because they correct my distance vision in the other eye and my near vision in both and I’ve grown accustomed to having those little windshields over my eyes. I feel not quite dressed without them. And modern specs, with plastic lenses, are considerably lighter and more comfortable than the glass lenses I had back when I first needed the things.

I have floaters, little specks that make their way across my field of vision, but I’ve learned to ignore them.
 
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Messages
12,948
Location
Germany
Choose:

Grandpa - Pa - Son ;)
 

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GHT

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,777
Location
New Forest
Did your grandma wear very short mini skirts, thin panties, high boots, and no bra?
Did she listen to Led Zeppelin, The Beatles, Janis Joplin, and the Rolling Stones?
Did she ride on motorcycles and fast cars?
Did she smoke tobacco and.............................other things?
Did she drink gin & tonics, whiskey, and whatever?
Did she arrive home at 4 a.m. and still leave for work in the morning?

Know that you will never be as cool as your grandma.
 

FOXTROT LAMONT

One Too Many
Messages
1,722
Location
St John's Wood, London UK
Holiday now and thru next week, too zapped insomnia and lifestyle, but London stayed put so playing horses
in Kentucky and California, keyboard at ready. Too lazy today to delve deeply the excellent equine empiricals
the Yanks maintain so just eyeing tote board and gauging the public perception for chasing money paid.
This practice is followed for stock-actual corporate issue and thoroughbreds.
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
Messages
33,728
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
Did your grandma wear very short mini skirts, thin panties, high boots, and no bra?
Did she listen to Led Zeppelin, The Beatles, Janis Joplin, and the Rolling Stones?
Did she ride on motorcycles and fast cars?
Did she smoke tobacco and.............................other things?
Did she drink gin & tonics, whiskey, and whatever?
Did she arrive home at 4 a.m. and still leave for work in the morning?

Know that you will never be as cool as your grandma.

My grandmother rolled her stockings down to her knees, smoked three packs of Pall Malls a day, and had her first heart attack at thirty-five.
 
Messages
10,933
Location
My mother's basement
My grandmother rolled her stockings down to her knees, smoked three packs of Pall Malls a day, and had her first heart attack at thirty-five.
I long ago learned to ignore easy, flippant dismissals of health and safety hazards of the "my grandpa smoked two packs of Camels a day and died in his sleep at age 86" and "we never wore seatbelts and motorcycle helmets yet here we are" variety.

Yes, something is gonna get ya sooner or later. I'd rather it be later.
 
Messages
12,948
Location
Germany
You name it!
I have a female classmate, born Dec. 1984, always let me think about exactly Janis Joplin. She was always full of life, hedonistic, superficial, powerfull, smokes cigarettes (but seemingly not much), is still trim with surely strong metabolism and is too exhausting for my taste. Which intelligent man would marry such?? Foxtrott-Uniform-Charlie-Kilo, absolutely! But marry, OMG!!
 

AbbaDatDeHat

I'll Lock Up
Messages
8,835
You name it!
I have a female classmate, born Dec. 1984, always let me think about exactly Janis Joplin. She was always full of life, hedonistic, superficial, powerfull, smokes cigarettes (but seemingly not much), is still trim with surely strong metabolism and is too exhausting for my taste. Which intelligent man would marry such?? Foxtrott-Uniform-Charlie-Kilo, absolutely! But marry, OMG!!
Well….not Bobby McGee.
Maybe Johnny Holmes.
B
 

FOXTROT LAMONT

One Too Many
Messages
1,722
Location
St John's Wood, London UK
You name it!
I have a female classmate, born Dec. 1984, always let me think about exactly Janis Joplin. She was always full of life, hedonistic, superficial, powerfull, smokes cigarettes (but seemingly not much), is still trim with surely strong metabolism and is too exhausting for my taste. Which intelligent man would marry such?? Foxtrott-Uniform-Charlie-Kilo, absolutely! But marry, OMG!!
A stray alley cat you'd bell, but rather not take to heart, hearth, and herrings? Talk about skinning a cat.
 

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