Women over 50? 40?

[Foofoogal]

Not sure if this is covered anywhere on the FL so far and I searched but cannot find this info if it is.

Wondering on opinions about hair and coloring or anything else on more mature shall we say women.

1. Should one only have shorter hair at 40 or 50?
2. To flatter should a mature woman go darker in color or lighter?
Any ideas? Personal observations? etc.

 

[Naama]

So, I'm only in my 20's but I'm so free and insert my 2cents ^^

I don't think that any women has to go shorter! I think most do it because the hair gets thinner, but I like think there are some women in there 40s/50s or even older who look great with longer hair! And I think they shouldn't think that they have to wear theire hair in an updo or something! (to me it seems like they do, don't know... [huh] )
I read that it's good to go lighter in colour... But I think there is no rule you can apply to everyone! Oh! And I wasn't sure, are you speaking of hair colour? Then definitely lighter! Because dark colours bring out wrinkles! And, I also like grey hair! So if you go grey, don't worry



Naama

 

[olive bleu]

It is positively eerie that you have posted this. 15 seconds ago i was thinking about starting a thread myself on sorta the same thing!!

I have a lot of questions about the same thing.First of all the hair length.I am now 41. I had long hair my whole life ( with periods here and there of going really short & growing it back out again). For the past 4 years I have had my hair short.I struggle with this.I don't want to give up on long hair, but i don't know.I have tried growing it longer again but i can't take it. #1, i find the texture of my hair is not what it once was , and i find when it is longer, it is not as tidy as I like it to be. It is still very thick, but gets a bit scraggly now .On the other hand, i have seen women in their 60's that have long hair that is absolutely gorgeous.I personally believe, as i have said on many occasions, that people should really feel free to what they like regardless of age. However, at this point, i generally know what looks good on me and what doesn't. I am now starting to learn to enjoy my short hair and how easy it is. for myself, i find it is tidier and looks better.

As for colour, i have always colored my hair. Usually it is not extreme. My natural colour is dark brown with reddish highlights, and i usually just use a dark auburn dye, to give it extra shine and umph.(spelling?)However,I have heard that as you get older you should not go as dark as the natural colour you had in your youth, as your skin tone changes and the colour would be too harsh.My aunts and my mother all follow this( they are all natural brunettes), but i haven't as yet. about 4 months ago I got the crazy idea to colour my hair black and it was awful! Made me look 10 years older.I think there is some truth to this theory.

I have recently been thinking about a drastic change and going much lighter, but the upkeep with the roots etc might be a bit much.I have been saying for years that when i am completely grey, then i am going blonde!

 

[olive bleu]

Here are a couple of excerpts from an article in the "LADIES HOME JOURNAL" 1927..written by actress, Anne Harding..

on length of hair...

"Hair really is the crowning glory of a woman. It lights up her person, it frames her face, it makes a halo around her.

No matter how she mangles it, or mistreats it, no matter if she cuts most of it off, her hair still remains the most telling item of her appearance.

Of all the supposedly permanent adjuncts of a woman's person—her eyes, her nose, her teeth, or hair—the last is the only one over which the possessor has absolute control. She can control its color—to a too great extent—its length, its shape. She can treat it like an article of dress, changing its shape and its style as often as she pleases.

The most radical change in the costume of women in our times has been the change in hair styles. Short hair is considered chic. It is also the symbol of the freedom of women. But bobbing the hair won't make you free. It isn't so simple as that. And having long hair won't make you reactionary and stupid. That's mixing spiritual causes to make aesthetic effects, and it can't be done. By this you may assume I have long hair. I have—very long hair, and quantities of it.

I like long hair because it means variety, and variety is difficult to achieve with bobbed hair. No matter what sort of dress you put on, if your hair is short your head always looks the same. A severe bob with a bouffant period evening dress is a hideous combination, yet I've seen many such incongruities. Frenchwomen who have short hair are clever enough to wear transformations with their evening clothes, for whatever the virtues of a bob, it does not go with the grande manner. Professionally it is valuable to me to have long hair, because I can dress it in different ways for the different types of women I am in various plays.

If my hair were the fine, slithery sort that's always coming down I'd bob it. Neatness, trimness is the essential thing in dressing the hair. If short bits of hair insist on escaping your hairpins, if you can't dress your hair and be sure it will stay put without being forced to pin it over and over again during the day, it is better to end the annoyance by cutting off such troublesome tresses. For to be beautiful, hair and head must form one perfect, one harmonious single outline. One mustn't look messy, and no head looks well groomed with straggling hair. My sister's hair was like that. It was so heavy and she had so much of it, she could never do it up smartly or have it stay put. When she cut it off I was surprised at the change it made in her appearance. She is more attractive. She looks ten years younger, and very smart and neat now".


at 41, my tresses have become "troublesome" , which is why i keep it short

 

[olive bleu]

and this on the issue of dying ones hair...

"There are some things one wants done which only an experienced hair dresser can do. Hair, if it must be dyed, for instance, is best dyed in a reputable beauty parlor. One can understand dyeing hair while it is in process of turning gray if it is graying in splotches. But hair, once gray, should never be dyed. Dyed hair makes the face look hard, and if there is one thing an aging face needs it is a softening frame. Gray hair is beautiful in its own color and its own right, just as maturity is beautiful if beautifully. borne. Some of the most striking women one meets are women with prematurely gray hair who have had fine enough taste to make the most of this so-called misfortune. They look as dignified and charming as ladies out of an eighteenth-century court. Gray hair brings out all the delicate tones in the skin. It is striking, it is beautiful, it is never obviously artificial, as dyed hair almost always is."

 

[LizzieMaine]

One of the good things about being over 40 is that you can do whatever you want without being pressured or feeling obliged to follow the whims and trends of fashion, and if anyone doesn't like it you can freely tell them exactly where to get off. That's how I feel about the whole hair business -- my mother, aged 69, is a devout believer in what I have often called the Compulsory Menopausal Helmet and keeps telling me I'm too old to wear my hair "long" (actually, it's just below shoulder length, which is where it's been for at least the past fifteen years.).

I say to her, "Nertz." And I mean it. My grandmother wore her hair exactly the same way and exactly the same color from her mid-twenties till the day she died, and if I feel like doing likewise, I will. So there.

 

[olive bleu]

Amen, sisterlol



p.s. i added the excerpts from LHJ because i thought it was interesting not because i believe in it.

 

[Blondie]

I worry that bleached blonde hair ages me,
so i am gradually going darker......
First i dyed it golden blonde, and am now thinking strawberry blonde,
and then just let my own natural hair colour grow out ( a medium strawberry blonde with some copper, if my memory serves me correct, it's been a long time lol )
I too have noticed my hair is changing/ a bit thinner/ dryer ( but prob. because of bleaching it forever )
I say do whatever works for you !

 

[Foofoogal]

I was wondering about this mainly for myself. I had really long hair when I was younger and then fell into cutting it shorter. Now I have it shoulder length but am tired of coloring it. It last about 5-8 wks to color and I cannot imagine all the dye is good for me.
I know there are so many factors and just wanted opinions.
If one goes gray is there a way to do it gracefully. Does the stuff like Roux or whatever really help the dinginess or whatever one calls it?

 

[Miss 1929]

Boo on Roux

I was wondering about this mainly for myself. I had really long hair when I was younger and then fell into cutting it shorter. Now I have it shoulder length but am tired of coloring it. It last about 5-8 wks to color and I cannot imagine all the dye is good for me.
I know there are so many factors and just wanted opinions.
If one goes gray is there a way to do it gracefully. Does the stuff like Roux or whatever really help the dinginess or whatever one calls it?

Roux is like a super temporary tint, it washes out in one or two washings. So if you want to make the Roux people rich...

I found it to be nasty, sticky, dulling and it came off on everything! I used it while growing out a permanent black dye to try to dark down my brown with red highlights natural color. Not a success.

I am going gray rapidly, and I can't wait until it's all there, but right now it's about halfway and the total effect is mouse. So I am dyeing most of it back to my natural color with a 6-week temporary dye, and leaving a few dramatic gray stripes. This still gives me the contrast of my real haircolor, but I don't look dyed and like I am trying to look younger (I am 48).

Regarding length of hair, as long as it's healthy and pretty, I like it long on any age of woman! A couple of my friends have waist length white hair, and it's beautiful.

Now, if we are talking about dressing Golden Era, though, in that case, no, I think it should be put up if it isn't short, but you all know that ...

 

[The Shirt]

Miss 1929- your hair is gorgeous and I appreciate how you are letting a bit of the streaks thru. It is exactly the same look I intend to go for when I get a bit more gray to mine. LizzieMaine - I think yours is a perfect length for you - don't let your mother talk you into anything else. They are not always right.

I am developing racing stripes at the sides and everyone comments that I should let them show. I think it was More Magazine that had an article recently about going grey over the course of the year and the woman's experience of it.

 

[Foofoogal]

More Magazine

I really love that magazine. Thanks for all the info everyone.
I have had every length of hair and have never been over protective of my hair as I always figure it would grow back. I have very thick hair naturally medium brown. It is so funny as to why I am hesitant to let it go gray really.
Just had a birthday and maybe this is why.
I am probably happier than I have ever been in my whole life lately and enjoy the freedom of my age and my choices and path I have taken.
I just may try it to see. I can always reach for the dye. lol

 

[KittyT]

I don't think there are (or should be!) any hard and fast rules for this stuff. You've lived in your body the longest and you know what looks best on you! Yes, hair texture and skin tone can change over time but those are gradual changes to which one can make slight adjustments as the changes occur. And as Lizzie already said, aging does tend to free you from fashion trends, so I say consult your hairdresser or an esthetician and do whatever makes you feel good and comfortable in your own body! Let them help you find something that suits your style and personality, and works with what you naturally have in terms of hair color/texture/face shape/etc, not necessarily something that just "fits your age".

The one consideration regarding dyeing is that dye dries your hair out and hair does tend to dry out on its own as you age. It's growth also tends to slow, which means it may take a lot longer should you choose to grow out an unsatisfactory dye job. Grey can be so lovely!

 

[The Shirt]

Article link

http://www.more.com/style/hair/gray-hair/

Here was the article I was thinking about. I think More Magazine is fantastic. I picked up my mothers copy a couple of years ago and have been a fan ever since. I honestly think it is just as appropriate for a gal in her 30s who wants to beat the clock and save for the future. Very empowering even if there is some fluff.

I sometimes muse- if I only had the confidence at 22 that I have at 36 - my life might be different. Regardless though - I'm glad I got here - better late than never.

 

[olive bleu]

http://www.more.com/style/hair/gray-hair/


I sometimes muse- if I only had the confidence at 22 that I have at 36 - my life might be different. Regardless though - I'm glad I got here - better late than never.

this is why they say" youth is wasted on the young"

 

[TessTrueheart]

Oh, I loved that article! I read something similar in Vogue about a year ago and was inspired to let the grey show. But it turned out I'm not grey enough, my usual brown hair color just looked dull. My hairdresser tells me you need to be at least 40% grey for it to actually look grey... So now I'm dying it again. Oh well, I'll give it a year or two and try for grey again...

 

[Foofoogal]

Wow, I read every word of that article and I think she about covered all that I am now thinking and will thru the process. I figure if an ex CEO can do it maybe I can also. I just hear women griping all the time of having to get their roots done if they are showing a tiny bit and as this woman spoke of, you just don't see many gray ladies in the 40s and 50s. Strange really. Thanks.

 

[LaMedicine]

I'll be 60 next year. Yes, really.
My hair is long, varies from just below shoulders, to reaching below my breast right now. On the job, I have it up in a twist, off times, I usually have it in a pony tail (yes, because it's the easiest way of keeping my hair out of my face ) or a bun.
Premature gray runs in my family, and I was getting it too. I didn't mind it, and was going to let nature take its course, but more than 10 years ago when I looked at a pic take a few days ago, I realized that with my coloring (black hair, ivory skin), graying hair brought out the worst of skin tone--looked gahstly pale instead of healthy pale. Now, with my job (I am a physician) I figured that it wouldn't do my patients any good having a sickly looking dr. So, I started dyeing my hair. Not completely dark, but just with enough color that the gray would become slightly beigeish, and pick up and enhance my skin tone. As the amount of gray increased, I changed to henna (for treatment as much as color), which makes it more orangish, but I am happy with it. Now, my hair is black with varying tones of orange streaks running through. I get compliments that it looks good on me, and because of the lighter tone, the roots showing don't make that strong a contrast as it would have, if I had dyed my hair darker so it's closer to my natural color.
All this works for me, and I'm happy with it.
I do occasionally talk of lopping my tail off with my hair dresser, but she keeps on saying that she can't imagine my hair anything else than how I have it now, so that idea always gets nipped off in the bud. lol

I figure I am old enough and have enough clout to carry out and get away with anything, so long as I keep things classy, sophisticate and chic, with a dash of humor added

 

[Renee]

If one goes gray is there a way to do it gracefully.

I think so ...

I'm 43 and about 50-60% gray now. I've been complimented by many people on my gray hair and it is unusual to see someone of my relatively "young" age be so gray. I'm quite happy with it, and am actually wishing that I will just go totally silver in the next few years but I do think there is a "crossover point" that you come to before you fully accept your gray hair. It probably has something to do with the percentage of gray that you actually have. I can't really say what the difference is between "going gray" and "being gray" but your mind does make a mental shift and it just doesn't bother you anymore.

I wear a layered bob; the length is right about where my neck meets my shoulders. I find that this gives me enough length to have the illusion of longer hair, but also looks neat and tidy. I think many people who say they dislike gray hair on women are really put off by (1) the short gray "helmet head" look that so many older ladies sport and (2) longer gray hair that looks messy and unkempt. My current hairstyle avoids both problems. It's also easy to care for. You may find, as many of us do, that the texture of your gray hair is different and requires a change in care/styling. I know that mine tends to be drier, a bit coarser, and doesn't curl as easily as it used to.

The best way to keep gray hair looking pretty is to use a shampoo specially formulated for it every 1-2 weeks. I alternate between one made by Pantene, and a shampoo called Shimmer Lights that I buy at Sally's Beauty Supply. The Shimmer Lights is really the best of the two, but it has a stronger smell and is not as gentle as the Pantene. But both remove any dull yellow tones that can make gray hair look very unattractive. I tell people that you have to start thinking of your gray hair like the white fur coat of a pet - it gets discolored easily and needs a special brightening shampoo to keep it looking great.

I have heard, though, that those who have warmer coloring (Springs and Autumns in the 4 Season system) have the hardest time going gray, tend to be the unhappiest of those actually going gray, and are often advised to continue to color until they're completely gray. I think it has something to do with the clashing of skin and hair tones. I'm a Summer in that system, with blue eyes and a fair, blue-based skin tone and my gray is silvery, so my gray is actually complimentary to my coloring. But I have an aunt in her 60's who was a redhead; she colors her hair and it looks fantastic. So it really does depend on the person.

 

[LaMedicine]

I have heard, though, that those who have warmer coloring (Springs and Autumns in the 4 Season system) have the hardest time going gray, tend to be the unhappiest of those actually going gray, and are often advised to continue to color until they're completely gray. I think it has something to do with the clashing of skin and hair tones. I'm a Summer in that system, with blue eyes and a fair, blue-based skin tone and my gray is silvery, so my gray is actually complimentary to my coloring. But I have an aunt in her 60's who was a redhead; she colors her hair and it looks fantastic. So it really does depend on the person.

Which is exactly my problem. I'm an Autumn in that system, so gray in black--monotone-- doesn't complement me. Graying gracefully was my ideal...but my coloring isn't amenable to that, so I choose complementary colors for my hair along with makeup and clothing.