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Welcome To The No Spender Bender

Paisley

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,439
Location
Indianapolis
LizzieMaine said:
Ear infection followed a week later by a violent allergic reaction to the antibiotic. Insult to injury, in other words, but I'm doing better. But the whole experience has forced me to severely reevaluate my spending, and I absolutely can't afford to get sick in any way for at least the next two years. So I don't just have to watch my spending, I also have to watch my health!

I'm sorry to hear you've been sick. Something I recently heard of, from a blog that a cardiologist writes, is that vitamin D3 really helps protect against illness. I know advice like that goes around all the time, but this is coming out more from medical literature. And consider that we get very little sun exposure, especially in the winter. However, you must take it with oil since D3 is fat soluble.

Something anyone can do for free for their health is to try a wheat-free or dairy-free diet for four weeks. (See my blog, link below, for details.) I've been off wheat for a month and a half, and so far I've lost over five pounds, cut my appetite, stopped getting bloated, and the best thing is that my acid reflux has all but stopped. As of yesterday, I've stopped taking prescription acid blockers, which are expensive and have side effects my doctors never told me about. (Little things like osteoporosis, anemia, hip fracture, vitamin absorption problems, infections, and certain types of cancer.) And I'm saving $400 a year not having to take those (&$)*!$ pills.
 

23SkidooWithYou

Practically Family
Messages
533
Location
Pennsylvania
I'm officially IN on NSB!

I'm new to vintage and each discovery sends me squealing like a kid in a candy shop. I convince myself I "need" things just because. [huh] Then I look at what I've collected so far and it's a mish mash. I still don't really have one complete outfit. So, my NSB allows shopping but for items that complete what I have, or can serve as good basic, wearable pieces.

I made a list of "Red Light" items that are off limits. I also defined my 3 free passes, which I call "Golden Tickets". If I find a piece of the Vernonware pattern I'm collecting to use as everyday dishes, I can buy it. If I find the perfect chenille bedspread (at the perfect price), I can buy it but at the expense of some of my "Green Light" basics list. I gave myself one pass for a single dressy dress (which I don't need at all). I really wanted to put dressy dresses on the red light list, but I didn't have the strength to completely forbid it. So, I have a loophole on that one but will try very hard to be reasonable and channel my $ where I can use it and enjoy it everyday.

My plan is to stick with this for March and April.
I'm going to try really hard to just delete my "saved searches" ebay emails and spend less time scouring Etsy. Bidding wars are out and I must acknowledge shipping fees as part of the purchase price. I typically just glaze past those and try not to think about it, but it does add up.
 

Foofoogal

Banned
Messages
4,884
Location
Vintage Land
As a vintage and antique dealer it would seem odd I am posting on this thread but kudos to all of you.
As no. 9 of 11 children I completely know and also sometimes rein it in.

As a Christian and a dealer the last thing I ever want to think I am doing is aiding in someones weakness for lack of better words and making it harder for my fellow man.
It does make me mad though that shipping has so got out of hand if you want to do it safely for both parties.
After a person factors in their cost and all it leaves less profit of course.
This has hurt everyone.

I am especially sorry to hear about Lizzie. I hope you feel better and are able to pay things off quickly.

So basically I wanted to cheer all of you on. I know vintage temptation and it is very hard to not buy. Believe me I know.

If you happen to go and look just leave all money at home. lol
Only way I can do it.
 

23SkidooWithYou

Practically Family
Messages
533
Location
Pennsylvania
Foofoogal said:
As a Christian and a dealer the last thing I ever want to think I am doing is aiding in someones weakness for lack of better words and making it harder for my fellow man.

FooFoo,

I can only speak for myself, but I don't view NSB as a tool by which to make ends meet. What I mean is, sellers aren't breaking me or tempting me to the point that my daily/monthly finacial responsibilities can't be met. I only shop with my discretionary income and I feel that's true for the majority of us. We know our limits. So, I don't want you to feel like you are doing harm to your fellow human.

My personal goal for NSB is to temporarily limit what I spend because I know I have a large expenditure coming up in about 2 months. If I do spend, and I know I will and already have, it has to be for something usefull that I really and truly NEED.

eg After I left retail management, my wardrobe really deteriorated. I also lost 30 lbs since May 2009. I'm down to scrubs for work and baggy worn out T's and pants. So, my very recent purchase of 2 pair of Freddies is totally okay. 1) they were on sale 2) they can be worn everyday 3) they fill a desperate NEED in my wardrobe.

I have a bad habit of giving myself permission to spend $20 here or there on cute or fun or pretty items that I want but then deny myself a $50 item that I truly need. My brain isn't registering cumulative effect so I'm not shopping wisely. NSB is helping me to realize that I'd get more SATISFACTION from one $50 purchase than a costly pile of inexpensive indulgences. The seller doesn't own that pattern of behavior, I do as the purchaser. (OMG! That was so cathartic!)

Am I making sense?

Basically, I was gonna spend it anyway but now I'm trying to think about the long term satisfaction and usefullness of what I've spent it on.
 

kamikat

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,794
Location
Maryland
LizzieMaine said:
I'm all for this -- especially since my own finances have been thrown into disarray by a couple of recent trips to the ER.
I hope you're feeling better! We're in the same boat. During the blizzard, both my son and I needed to go to the ER for stitches after falls on the ice. Just when you think you've got a handle on your pocketbook, a single trip to the ER can send it all back into the toilet.
 

kamikat

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,794
Location
Maryland
Skidoo, I'm in the same boat, but the opposite. I lost a bunch of weight and got rid of all my fat clothes. Then I had a medical issue that required medications that put on lots of weight fast as a side effect. Most of my wardrobe doesn't fit or is worn out.
As for only spending discretionary income: my husband and I each get a spending allowance that doesn't affect the household budget. Somehow, husband has enough money to get a new iPod every time there's a new generation but I never have enough money to get a Starbuck's. It's simple, he saves his allowance for several months, with no splurges, and I constantly spend on little purchases all the time, spending down to my last penny every month. That's the habit I'm trying to break. The other habit I want to break is buying from the big box stores. Sure, it may cost only $10 for a shirt from Target, but it only lasts one season, then you have to throw it out. I'd rather have a smaller wardrobe of higher-end, well-made garments that last for several years.
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
Messages
33,840
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
It's those "little splurges" that really add up. One can look at a $150 pair of shoes and say "well, I can't afford that and don't really need it," and it's not that hard to just walk away. But when you see something for $10 it's very easy to talk yourself into "well, what's ten bucks, anyway?" But those add up very fast.

One of the most sobering things you can do if you're an eBay addict is go to your My EBay page and look at winning bids for the "Last 60 Days." If you see a big amount there, two or three hundred dollars worth of $10 purchases, well, it's something to think about. Is that two or three hundred something you could have used better for something else?
 

23SkidooWithYou

Practically Family
Messages
533
Location
Pennsylvania
kamikat said:
It's simple, he saves his allowance for several months, with no splurges, and I constantly spend on little purchases all the time, spending down to my last penny every month. That's the habit I'm trying to break. The other habit I want to break is buying from the big box stores. Sure, it may cost only $10 for a shirt from Target, but it only lasts one season, then you have to throw it out. I'd rather have a smaller wardrobe of higher-end, well-made garments that last for several years.


I'm glad you mentioned big box stores! I am not kidding when I tell you that everyday wardrobe is down to nothing. I could just run to Tarjay or the like and stock up on some cute tops and pants but they won't be what I really want and, as you wisely said, they won't last. (My Grandmother always told us don't spend a lot on summer clothes because you'll be replacing them next season and that was when they still made quality!)

Do you find you are quick to splurge on other people?

I'm realizing that I put myself last, after family and pets. I'm not saying I shouldn't be generous to those I love, just that I can't be generous to the exclusion of my own needs. (Whoa! Catharsis #2, explore self worth as it relates to spending behavior.)
 

kamikat

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,794
Location
Maryland
23SkidooWithYou said:
Do you find you are quick to splurge on other people?
I'm quick to splurge on other people if it's extra money. If I get some birthday or Christmas money, I love taking girlfriends out for lunch or coffee. If it's my regular spending money, I always waste it and don't have any for splurging on others. That's one of the things that I can do on the NSB. I now have the money to take a friend to coffee, nothing fancy, just a latte and a muffin. That doesn't go against my personal NSB rules because it's one of the things I haven't been able to enjoy since eBay came into my life :D
 

HungaryTom

One Too Many
Messages
1,204
Location
Hungary
This thread brings us to the need of discussing this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Compulsive_hoarding

Inky, thank you for beginning this thread by offering a way out from this disorder.
It might also help to keep record about the spendings at the respective "hobby".
The resulting horrifying figures maybe help to curb back the own consumption and to be saved from the own obsessions.

Daizawaguy named another thing: the joy factor; whether it is proportional to have one more vs. the monetary/personal/timely efforts.

Regards:

Tom
 

Foofoogal

Banned
Messages
4,884
Location
Vintage Land
23SkidooWithYou

Thank you for your reply. I greatly appreciate it as I do struggle a lot with this issue on many levels.

I think it would be best to have a few beautiful pieces of vintage that you really could or would not want to part with and pull them out and enjoy them from time to time.



Tom:We could do pages and pages on this. I do not necessarily think collectors automatically fall into hoarding category.
If the object or objects are being kept at peril then there is a problem.
 

Paisley

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,439
Location
Indianapolis
kamikat said:
I hope you're feeling better! We're in the same boat. During the blizzard, both my son and I needed to go to the ER for stitches after falls on the ice. Just when you think you've got a handle on your pocketbook, a single trip to the ER can send it all back into the toilet.

If an urgent care center is in your area, you can save a lot of money vs. going to a hospital ER for minor emergencies.

ETA: I didn't mean to say that you should have done anything differently--I just wanted to provide a tip.

I hope you and your son are feeling better.
 

kamikat

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,794
Location
Maryland
Paisley said:
If an urgent care center is in your area, you can save a lot of money vs. going to a hospital ER for minor emergencies.

ETA: I didn't mean to say that you should have done anything differently--I just wanted to provide a tip.

I hope you and your son are feeling better.
My son did go to a walk-in pediatric center that is nearby, but they don't serve adults. All of the walk-in adult clinics around here close around 8 on Sundays.
 

Inky

One Too Many
Messages
1,743
Location
State of Confusion AKA California
LizzieMaine said:
It's those "little splurges" that really add up. One can look at a $150 pair of shoes and say "well, I can't afford that and don't really need it," and it's not that hard to just walk away. But when you see something for $10 it's very easy to talk yourself into "well, what's ten bucks, anyway?" But those add up very fast.

One of the most sobering things you can do if you're an eBay addict is go to your My EBay page and look at winning bids for the "Last 60 Days." If you see a big amount there, two or three hundred dollars worth of $10 purchases, well, it's something to think about. Is that two or three hundred something you could have used better for something else?

exactly!! i would rather save up for a bit to buy the one item i really want that is of value to me and quality, rather than a bunch of little things that are inconsequential and forgettable over time.

That is an excellent suggestion for eBAy, Lizzie!!
 

Amy Jeanne

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,858
Location
Colorado
I'm doing this in a round-about way. NO MORE PATTERNS until I make what I have. I've even made a Flickr album to keep track of my progress. And I have loads of fabric so I won't need to buy any of that for a while.
 

The Shirt

Practically Family
Messages
852
Location
Minneapolis
I have been on this sort of thing for about 1-1/2 years now. It was very very tough in the beginning to give up my daily trolling of ebay and etsy. It's way easier now. I have cut my target runs down to once a month (I used to never be able to get out of there without an additional $50 spent).

I think you just have to remember your motivation for doing it. I had a large amount of debt that is all but eliminated today. I still am able to treat my friends and family. I do feel deprived now and then that I cannot just spend $10 on something frivolous. But at the end of the month instead of freaking out- I can put some away in savings for the future (and that noguchi table!)

So I'm in. No frivolous spending. 1 free pass a month. 1 free meal out a month. Get stuff for sale photographed in the next 2 months.
 

23SkidooWithYou

Practically Family
Messages
533
Location
Pennsylvania
Marc Chevalier said:
.




As a seller of unnecessary vintage menswear, I'm hoping that my potential customers won't join the No Spender Bender. ;)


.

Oh Marc, I'm sure none of your clients need NSB! ...and if they think they do, I promise to talk them out of it!:D
 

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