The End of the Collector Mindset

[scottyrocks]

I think this makes sense. A friend in Belfast who has a fairly large house often hosts social gatherings, and these invariably end up centred on the kitchen (largely that's where the booze is....). Smaller gatherings, especially those which involve the television, tend to their front room. I've never been keen on the idea of total open plan, though if I had a 'good' room for visitors and a big enough kitchen for a sofa and lounging area, I'd be perfectly happy in the kitchen most of the time.

The kitchen is the heart of the home.

 

[tonyb]

My grandfather, in whose home I resided for a year or two during one of the more fractious periods in my parents' relationship, referred to the kitchen as his "office."

His house dated from the early 20th century. Front room, dining room, kitchen, sun porch. Bedrooms and big bathroom upstairs; water closet on first floor, tucked under the stairs.

Unless he was sleeping or availing himself of the comfort facilities, he was most likely to be at the kitchen table, sitting in one of those vinyl and chrome dinette chairs at a matching Formica-topped table, a cup of coffee nearby if not already in one hand and a Pall Mall in the other. Or nearby.

 

[TimeWarpWife]

The kitchen is the heart of the home.

Not in our home, it's the living room. We have a galley kitchen and as dh and I are not small people, it's it a bit crowded for both of us to be in there at the same time.

 

[LizzieMaine]

I lived for a while in a house built by Finnish immigrants in the early 19th Century. These were apparently not large people, because the kitchen ceiling was less than six feet from the floor -- and with the water pipes suspended from the ceiling, it was hard for me to walk upright in the room, and I'm barely five foot seven. Given that I enjoy walking upright whenever possible, I didn't stay in that house long.

 

[tonyb]

I lived for a while in a house built by Finnish immigrants in the early 19th Century. These were apparently not large people, because the kitchen ceiling was less than six feet from the floor -- and with the water pipes suspended from the ceiling, it was hard for me to walk upright in the room, and I'm barely five foot seven. Given that I enjoy walking upright whenever possible, I didn't stay in that house long.

Is the structure still standing?

 

[LizzieMaine]

Yep, it's two houses up from where I live now. People taller than I am are living in it, but I don't know how.

 

[Edward]

I lived for a while in a house built by Finnish immigrants in the early 19th Century. These were apparently not large people, because the kitchen ceiling was less than six feet from the floor -- and with the water pipes suspended from the ceiling, it was hard for me to walk upright in the room, and I'm barely five foot seven. Given that I enjoy walking upright whenever possible, I didn't stay in that house long.

I used to know a girl who lived in an unofficial basement flat which had a ceiling at 5'9". Most people had to stoop, but she was only 5'2", so she was fine...

 

[tonyb]

Yep, it's two houses up from where I live now. People taller than I am are living in it, but I don't know how.

Sounds like building standards around there a couple centuries back were about whatever the builder decided they were.

 

[sheeplady]

I like an open floor plan. I find the use of space to be far more efficient. We only need one eating table, so a separate dining room and an eat-in kitchen would be a waste. I love to be in the kitchen, but I don't want to be locked away cooking by myself or have an inefficient space to cook in like those ginormous kitchens you see on TV.

I also have about a dozen sets of china (both restaurant and fine) and we rotate through them monthly for our Sunday night dinners. (Fancy dinner with the kids, candles and all.) My five year old already has picked out what set she wants when she "gets older and has an apartment or house." (Her words.) I told her that anytime she wants it, she can have it. And any of my other sets she'd like, assuming her brother doesn't have designs on them.

 

[Edward]

I like an open floor plan. I find the use of space to be far more efficient. We only need one eating table, so a separate dining room and an eat-in kitchen would be a waste. I love to be in the kitchen, but I don't want to be locked away cooking by myself or have an inefficient space to cook in like those ginormous kitchens you see on TV.

I also have about a dozen sets of china (both restaurant and fine) and we rotate through them monthly for our Sunday night dinners. (Fancy dinner with the kids, candles and all.) My five year old already has picked out what set she wants when she "gets older and has an apartment or house." (Her words.) I told her that anytime she wants it, she can have it. And any of my other sets she'd like, assuming her brother doesn't have designs on them.

She's more subtle than I was at that age. I once asked my grandmother if I could have a clock of hers to which I took a fancy "when [she] goes to Heaven."

 

[Edward]

(Said Grandmother is still with us, closing in on 92, and will probably outlive us all.)

 

[sheeplady]

She's more subtle than I was at that age. I once asked my grandmother if I could have a clock of hers to which I took a fancy "when [she] goes to Heaven."

My grandmother used to go around her house and promise me stuff (a doll, a collection of figurines) when she died. She died when I was 12, and I was devastated. My aunt showed up with a 32 foot moving truck the day she died. It was all worthless junk, but my grandmother had promised me these few things.

The story gets more twisted from here on out after the moving truck.

Needless to say, I'll be giving away anything my kids want while I'm alive.

 

[tonyb]

My grandmother used to go around her house and promise me stuff (a doll, a collection of figurines) when she died. She died when I was 12, and I was devastated. My aunt showed up with a 32 foot moving truck the day she died. It was all worthless junk, but my grandmother had promised me these few things.

The story gets more twisted from here on out after the moving truck.

Needless to say, I'll be giving away anything my kids want while I'm alive.

Best thing to do for your survivors.

I'm hoping my dear old ma lives to see a hundred and spends every dime along the way. I have a sibling with a, um, history. Wouldn't trust that person not to attempt acts of larceny against his family. He'd find a way to characterize it as something other than theft, of course, and he might even get strident about it. But he would convince no one but himself.

 

[3fingers]

Best thing to do for your survivors.

I'm hoping my dear old ma lives to see a hundred and spends every dime along the way. I have a sibling with a, um, history. Wouldn't trust that person not to attempt acts of larceny against his family. He'd find a way to characterize it as something other than theft, of course, and he might even get strident about it. But he would convince no one but himself.

There's one (or more) in every clan.
Been there.

 

[seres]

...I have a sibling with a, um, history. Wouldn't trust that person not to attempt acts of larceny against his family. He'd find a way to characterize it as something other than theft, of course, and he might even get strident about it. But he would convince no one but himself.

Yes, my sister turned out to be "that kind of person", too. She cleaned-out the house of all valuables, even those promised to me, before I could get there. Then tried to embezzle from the estate. I would never have guessed it.

 

[tonyb]

Off the top of my head I can think of only three items in my mother's place that I might wish for myself, none of which have much economic value. If you sold all three you might have enough for lunch out, provided you don't order drinks and dessert.

 

[sheeplady]

Best thing to do for your survivors.

I'm hoping my dear old ma lives to see a hundred and spends every dime along the way. I have a sibling with a, um, history. Wouldn't trust that person not to attempt acts of larceny against his family. He'd find a way to characterize it as something other than theft, of course, and he might even get strident about it. But he would convince no one but himself.

My aunt surprised me. Looking back, there was always something I didn't like about her. I didn't know her that well (I grew up a days travel from her and my parents weren't into visiting het) but I would characterize my feelings as suspicion or not quite trusting her.

I did get a (small) set of lunch dishes from my grandmother's house; green (both her and my favorite color) and a few red pieces. I've added (slowly) over the years to get to a set of 8. We use it at christmas. I also have some of her green depression glass, and her dollies. To me the dollies she hand crocheted were the most valuable thing, but they couldn't be sold for fast cash so my aunt wasn't interested. While my aunt got most of my grandmother's depressionware, I got a trunk full because my aunt "hated green."

 

[Acererak]

I'm not so sure about some of this material on millennials ... or rather, I think we are quick to suggest that they are different as opposed to young. When I was their age I didn't care about privacy or possessions, except for whatever car I was fixing up at the time. Then I changed. When your friends start moving on and your parents start dying maybe you want to hang on to your past a bit tighter. You start off adulthood defining how different you are from your parents then, as your life starts to look a bit more like theirs, things may change. There was a moment when I became fascinated by the world my parents had lived in ... it's one of the things that brought me here.

Often generalizations about millennials do seem pretty universal to anyone who was ever in their 20’s.


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[tonyb]

I have an in-law who is considerably better off financially than his one sibling. When time came to clear out their folks's place he advocated for just getting it done quickly and putting it behind him, while his sister wished to sell the stuff for as much as they reasonably could, even if that involved going to considerably more time and trouble.

No villain in this story. Just different perspectives.

 

[3fingers]

My father had one sister. He passed away before my grandmother which left my aunt in charge. When grandma passed my aunt cleaned out the small bank account and most of what was in the house regardless of what grandma had written down years before. Some of my family was very upset but I found what I really wanted in the trash. My grandpa's cereal bowl and metal drinking cup that sat on the back of the kitchen sink my whole life along with a few other pieces of glass from grandma's kitchen. I also got grandma's china closet which my aunt said was junk and not worth carrying out of the house. All of those things are in that china closet in our kitchen.
"Value" is in the eye of the valuer.