SUFFERING For Your STYLE

[Caledonia]

I think that's it. I didn't have the confidence or personal awareness when I was younger to do what I really believed in, now I do. And that extends to dress. You get older, you get more relaxed, you wear what makes you happy. And leave the spouses to their thoughts, they'll come round in the end when they realise this is you, and it looks good. Your man is potty Mystery not to like you in vintage, you look stunning! And the same goes for you Marc, even with the cranial take on the Edward Scissorhands look

 

[Etienne]

For me, the way I dress is simply a matter of what looks best on me. I don't wear exclusively vintage clothing but tend to add pieces that work best for the occasion and work best for my body type and personality. Sometimes I add all the elements together and look more vintage, but I never try for a costumed look. I happen to LOVE hats, gloves, 40's styles clothes and shoes and I feel most like ME when I wear them. No one I know wears vintage or even close to it, but that doesn't bother me at all. When I am dressed up (for church, for example) I feel centered, serene and very much "myself" with a modern wrap dress, peep-toe 40's heels, veiled hat, gloves, and vintage purse. I don't wear seamed stockings because that would seem costumey to me. So maybe I'm a "happy hybrid"?!

 

[Wild Root]

For me, the way I dress is simply a matter of what looks best on me. I don't wear exclusively vintage clothing but tend to add pieces that work best for the occasion and work best for my body type and personality. Sometimes I add all the elements together and look more vintage, but I never try for a costumed look. I happen to LOVE hats, gloves, 40's styles clothes and shoes and I feel most like ME when I wear them. No one I know wears vintage or even close to it, but that doesn't bother me at all. When I am dressed up (for church, for example) I feel centered, serene and very much "myself" with a modern wrap dress, peep-toe 40's heels, veiled hat, gloves, and vintage purse. I don't wear seamed stockings because that would seem costumey to me. So maybe I'm a "happy hybrid"?!

You live in LA and you don't have friends who wear this stuff too?[huh] You ought to get out more! Most of the members here are right in your backyard! Heck, you should come out to some of the Lounge events! We vintage lovers must stick together!

For me, I don't consider "Real" vintage a costume, some do, I don't. What they try and pass as 40's clothes in movies or costume shops are costumes. The real article is real, so, I wear it as such. I find it easier for a woman to wear vintage more so then a man... I see so many women today wearing bold fishnets or other flashy threads... seamed stockings wouldn't be looked at as a costume item I'd think but, I know most of the gals I'm friends with wear them only once in a wile.

Keep up the good work gals! Us guys are behind ya 100%

=WR=

 

[Nathan Dodge]

I find that if I try to "explain myself", I just get the vacant, ignorant stares from people. I also tend to dress retro in the style that fits in with what is acceptable to my surroundings (e.g. Cuba in the 1930s). In fact, I'm able to balance that retro look with modern clothing by approximating that look. That way, I get none of the derision and reap all of the compliments of looking "classy." So I guess I've managed to "fit in" without actually doing so...

 

[Absinthe_1900]

Just put the Pod next to her while she's sleeping, and when she wakes up she'll be one of us, mwa ha ha ha ha!

One of us!, One of Us! We Accept Her! lol

 

[LizzieMaine]

I find it easier for a woman to wear vintage more so then a man... I see so many women today wearing bold fishnets or other flashy threads... seamed stockings wouldn't be looked at as a costume item I'd think but, I know most of the gals I'm friends with wear them only once in a wile.
=WR=

I wear full-fashioned stockings most all the time myself -- and they're the part of my attire that tend to attract the most comment from people. Most of the comments are from women -- who want to know where I got them! So maybe there's a trend just waiting to happen -- and maybe the good folks at Magnolia Hosiery will be getting a whole lot of new customers.

 

[RetroModelSari]

I can´t say that I suffered from the way I dressed. People allway stared at me cause of my chest before so I´m used to that and don´t even notice it when they stare at me cause of the way I´m dressed. Plus if my boyfriend loves my looks and now got himself a beautifull 40s trowser for the concert we´ll go to in two weeks. He´s an ex-Rockabilly and one can tell by the way he dresses. We share a lot of interests, like the same music, have the same principles and love vintage stuff. It took long to find the perfect guy for me but it was worth the waiting... And at work they allways notice when I´m styled nice (after all I work as a receptionist, so I shouldn´t look like I crawled out of a trash can )

 

[silhouette53]

.


Ghos7a55assin's story got me thinking ...

If you wear vintage (or vintage style) clothing and have a vintage hairstyle, do you pay a price for it? For instance, do you think that it might hurt your chances of being hired for a job you'd like, or getting a raise, or finding a romantic partner, or just plain being accepted by the world at large?

If there is a price, is it always worth paying? Or instead, do you sometimes compromise by not wearing vintage styles when you'd like to ... even when nothing (i.e., your job) is specifically prohibiting you from doing so?


.

I've been trying to think how a retro or vintage look might hinder a person in their job, or, in trying to secure a new position. I guess it depends how far 'off the current norm' you look. Whenever I think of vintage, I think of it from a personal (and male) perspective. I'm 52, and vintage for me means suits, shirts, shoes from the 30s/40s - a look which to me isn't really too stand-out in todays world ! BUT....... stick a hat atop that suit/shirt/shoes ensemble and its immediately 'different' I initially experienced a little trepidation at the thought of wearing a hat in public - I'd been to a couple 40s themed events - usually WW2 themed actually and always in USAAF gear. No big deal for me because everyone else is similarly attired or, if not, are expecting to see others so attired. 'Going public' though was a whole other issue for me but I was worrying unnecessarily because the first time I wore a fedora out in 'the world' no one took a damned bit of notice!!! I purposely adopted a "This is ME and I don't give a hoot whether YOU like it or not" attitude and strode purposefully around the city and in and out of shops etc, looking people in the eye as if I owned the place. It worked !! - I felt great and will never think twice again about wearing a hat or dressing however I choose.
Lets face it we live in a world where just about anything that CAN be done, HAS been done ( fashionwise) and I really don't think that people take as much notice as we think they do ! Back to the employment aspect though, as I said, to jeopardise your chances at a job interview it depends how far 'off the current norm' you look. I guess an illustration would be that a guy in a 40s suit/shirt/tie would stand out less than a guy in an extreme Rockabilly outfit with DA haircut and all the trimmings if you can imagine that. It goes without saying that the guy dressed like that shouldn't be discriminated against in any way but chances are he WILL be - and it is WRONG WRONG WRONG. How to deal with it ? I guess that's a question for each individual and how far they are prepared to compromise, back down or whatever.
If I were a prospective employer, I hope I would assess someone looking to work for me on the basis of their ability to do the job on offer, rather than the clothes they happened to be wearing.

 

[Twitch]

If you're applying for a tatoo artist job and you have un-illustrated lily perfect skin they'd wonder how serious you took tats wouldn't they? Can't show up to a job interview in the corporate world looking like Larry the Cable Guy either, no matter how many degrees and experience you have. You can play non-conformist later. Get the job 1st. Hey, ask if on-the-job dress is an issue at the interview. Most of the time it isn't unless you're physically meeting with upper echelon ivory tower types in the job. More and more owners and upper management dress casually.

Would you hire these guys before interviewing them just because they had suits on?

 

[jamespowers]

Would you hire these guys before interviewing them just because they had suits on?

No but they would at least get in the door.

Regards,

J

 

[Shimmy Sally]

As to the comments that Matei mentioned, what are some remarks all of you have received? I mostly just get the random compliments of "you look nice, why are you dressed up?" or "where can I learn to dance like that?"
Sometimes people come up with more interesting comments/insults. These are a few I can remember offhand:

"Are you filming a movie here?" -- from passersby of a dinner/dance event we were attending. I guess we all did a fantastic job to get that one.

"Is this some new fad or are you just weird?" -- I'm just weird. For now.

"Hey, check it out, it's Lurch. You rang?" -- directed towards my ex-beaufriend because he was tall, lanky, and wore a suit. He dressed more like Gomez actually.

"I like the heels and stockings, but your skirt is too long."

"I love your look. Where did you get an outfit like that? -- the answer is usually that I made it.

"Do you dress like this all the time? Even at work? What do your coworkers say?"

"I've never met a girl like you who didn't have tattoos before" -- you've never met a girl like me.

"I had a teacher who wore a dress just like that and I had such a crush on her" -- from a senior citizen of my favorite vintage dress.

"I love your outfit. I used to have one like that for my Barbie doll."

"What are you guys, Benny and Joon or something?" -- little did they know, Benny was the normal dressed brother in that movie.

"You look like you just stepped off the silver screen" -- my favorite so far. I got that compliment back when I was in high school in the eighties.

"I can't decide if you are ahead of your time or behind it."

"You look like Willie Wonka" -- towards my (ex)husband at our wedding. I can't really argue that, he did.

"What's wrong with your eyebrows?" -- yes, I have the scary type you all had been complaining about on another thread.

"Did you steal that purse off a dead clown?" -- if I saw a dead clown with a purse this cool, I would indeed steal it.

"I don't know if I can be seen with you in those shoes" -- of my 1930s brightly multicolored, flowered heels with rhinestone accents. Telling him they had been my grandmothers didn't help matters any. First date, last date

===================
Special bonus; most recent classic car tale:
The other night I was riding around in my friends '55 Rolls. I was being chauffeured in the back with the tray down. We got hungry and no restaurants were open, so we decided to drive through Taco Bell. Well, the steering wheel is on the right, so he had to pull up to get the back seat at the take-out window. He handed money back to me to pay for the order. The fast-food worker and I couldn't reach each other. Because of how the old Royce is built, you know, he couldn't pull us up close enough. I had to be a good sport, get out of the car to pay and get our junk food.
The line behind us was honking, laughing and making some pretty humorous remarks. It was fun. The worker seemed very annoyed that she had to deal with such characters slowing everything down. You could tell she hated her job (who wouldn't) and just wanted to close up and go home.

 

[ortega76]

"I've never met a girl like you who didn't have tattoos before" -- you've never met a girl like me.

I can kinda see this one. I see a lot of collectors in the chair rocking fedoras or other vintage pieces. These are the guys and gals that most frequently give genuine compliments on my hats and other vintage/vintagesque pieces.

 

[Baron Kurtz]

Suffer for style?

I can't say i really suffer for wearing what i do and carrying myself how i do. But then, i'm not too far from the norm.

Here's a man who certainly suffered for his style. He dared to be different. And was roundly criticised for it. A decidedly normal, but quirky, chap. RIP.

bk

 

[Shimmy Sally]

But then, i'm not too far from the norm.

Exactly; having curls in the hair, an unexposed navel, listening to your Granny's music and wearing heels more than most gals isn't going to upset many people. It's not new or extreme so people have a way to categorize it in their minds therefore it doesn't frighten them? I dunno.

 

[Miss_Bella_Hell]

I can't say i really suffer for wearing what i do and carrying myself how i do. But then, i'm not too far from the norm.

bk

I don't think anyone over 18 actually "suffers" for their style. If your style causes you pain, maybe you should change your style. The concept of suffering for style is the kind of thing some emo 14 year old would cry about. Big kids like us shouldn't be so self-pitying.

 

[Wild Root]

It's very interesting; I've suffered for style ever since I was a young lad. I never had clothes that were "IN" or trendy, the 80's I wore what ever my mother bought me... I didn't have much of a choice till I started to get older. Even then, my choice of dress was pretty dorky. When I became a teen, I tried to dress in popular trendy clothes, I tried to fit in but, it didn't work... so, I decided to jump off the trend train and do what I wanted to. I haven't ever regretted it!

I get more positive comments then negative... so many people are open minded here in CA, it's kind of nice. When ever I was interviewing for a job, I wore something vintage but, I left the hat at home. I felt that a fedora is just too much of a curve ball to most employers.

Now, what I wear is a major plus to my current job, I work full time at a nice quiet Antique shop in Down Town Monrovia. Its pretty kick back and quiet... and people always tell me how well I fit in with the store.

=WR=

 

[Miss_Bella_Hell]

It's very interesting; I've suffered for style ever since I was a young lad. I never had clothes that were "IN" or trendy, the 80's I wore what ever my mother bought me... I didn't have much of a choice till I started to get older. Even then, my choice of dress was pretty dorky. When I became a teen, I tried to dress in popular trendy clothes, I tried to fit in but, it didn't work... so, I decided to jump off the trend train and do what I wanted to. I haven't ever regretted it!

I get more positive comments then negative... so many people are open minded here in CA, it's kind of nice. When ever I was interviewing for a job, I wore something vintage but, I left the hat at home. I felt that a fedora is just too much of a curve ball to most employers.

Now, what I wear is a major plus to my current job, I work full time at a nice quiet Antique shop in Down Town Monrovia. Its pretty kick back and quiet... and people always tell me how well I fit in with the store.

=WR=

Well, you seem to prove my point. You had trouble when you were younger. Now you've come in to your own and wear what you like, and the suffering has greatly lessened.

 

[Marc Chevalier]

I started this thread as a result of my experience wearing vintage suits ('30s and '40s) in Santiago, Chile. I worked there for nearly a decade and my job often required that I wear a suit. (In Santiago, the 1950s never died. All office boys wear ties, and just about every man with a white collar job wears a suit, five or six days a week. Women wear suits, too: most offices provide dress suits as uniforms.)

Anyway, I got into a lot of trouble for wearing vintage suits. Chile is a very homogenous, socially conservative country, where people look very closely at your clothing to "measure you up" socioeconomically and even politically. Any detail that seems out of the norm is criticized. A wider lapel, a higher trouser waist: all indicate that you are a nonconformist ... and in Chile, nonconformism (and eccentricity) are considered dangerous to the social fabric.

The signifiers there are amazing. The first time I went out there with a pocket handkerchief in my suit jacket, I received some very cold stares. A Chilean friend later informed me that during the Pinochet dictatorship, members of the military Junta (and their supporters, in imitation) would wear white pocket handkerchiefs with their civilian suits. The handkerchiefs were subtle, unspoken indicators of a person's political leanings. I, of course, had no idea of all this.

Finally, spectator shoes are looked down on in Chile because they (along with fedoras and double-breasted pinstripe suits) are worn as a kind of uniform by Argentine tango dancers. A good number of Chileans despise (and envy) Argentines by reputation, so they don't like to see spectator shoes on their pavements. I wore my shoes anyway -- on the street, the subway and buses -- and never did I see so many eyes burning holes into me.

.

 

[Mojave Jack]

I find it very interesting that your vintage style serves as a kind of sieve. A signifier that lets others know whether they should approach or stay away ... thereby letting you filter others "out" or "in".

That's what all forms of fashion do, and always have. That old saw that "you can't judge a book by its cover" is pure bunk. Every one of us evaluates each and every social situation continuously through visual cues, and in fact, we depend upon the visual cues to make assessments every day all day.

What is unique today in the USA and some other Westernized nations is the phenomena of consciously cultivated personas, a unique hallmark of the post-modern era that evolved within the last thirty years. An unintended consequence of the television and electronic age is an increased isolationism and materialism, combined with disposable capital, which effectively means that people are no longer defined by what they do, but by what they own. Some people therefore adopt a persona that reflects his or her particular values; others let the crowd with which they affiliate dictate their persona. For the crowd here, it may be a desire to return to (what is perceived as) a less complicated, more polite, more stylish time. In fact, we are probably all nostalgic for a time and place that never really existed, like the Mayberry of The Andy Griffith Show, where there was no racism, no violence, and even the town drunk was a lovable character. We are, in effect, playing dress-up (just with a lot of class!). We simply have the disposable income combined with a greater degree of social anonymity that allows us to re-invent ourselves as we see fit, not to mention the social mobility to change our circumstances to a much greater extent than ever before.

 

[mysterygal]

I think it also helps being an adult. You get to a certain age where you start caring less about what other people think and start getting your own sense of style. Kids/teenagers on the other hand can be very cruel when it comes to anyone who looks 'different'.