Want to buy or sell something? Check the classifieds
  • The Fedora Lounge is supported in part by commission earning affiliate links sitewide. Please support us by using them. You may learn more here.

SUFFERING For Your STYLE

flat-top

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,772
Location
Palookaville, NY
If you are a vintage purist, like myself, you've got to accept that you may not find someone with the same interests. And sometimes, that's a good thing! My last girlfriend was into all "this", and yet, we just didn't get along. I tried to make it work simply because I felt that I wouldn't find anyone else with interests so similar to mine. It was not meant to be, yet I thought it was the end of world when we broke up. On the other hand, my current gal is the OPPOSITE of vintage, yet we think exactly alike and have the same ideals. She thinks the way I am just "me", and even though she has no interest, she will go with me to things like The WWII weekend, or a Rockabilly show here and there.
You've gotta look beyond style when it comes to relationships. You might be missing out on that special someone!
 

Wild Root

Gone Home
Messages
5,532
Location
Monrovia California.
Marc Chevalier said:
.


Stop suffering for your style, Root. Take a chance and give LizzieMaine a PM call. I'm serious. You've got nothing to lose.

.

Nah, I think I'm out of her league. ;)

I have dated some who don't share common interests... it was murder. We both got board... she didn't like my music and I'd have to suffer her music... it was depressing... also, I'm a swing dancer and she didn't want to learn to do that... I was dieing inside.

Yep, who I might marry doesn't have to be a carbon copy of me, just has to have some of the similar tastes and an appreciation for the style, that's all. Because, if not, soon as the wedding is over, some how they’ll get me to sell my old car and clothes… no thanks!

=WR=
 

Marc Chevalier

Gone Home
Messages
18,192
Location
Los Feliz, Los Angeles, California
More and more, my wife is finding this vintage thing a bit silly and pretentious. She doesn't enjoy going to events where lots of people dress in vintage clothing. I tend to go alone. Luckily, I have friends who do like this stuff, so all's well.

.
 

VintageJess

One of the Regulars
Messages
249
Location
Old Virginia
Wild Root said:
I have dated some who don't share common interests... it was murder. We both got board... she didn't like my music and I'd have to suffer her music... it was depressing... also, I'm a swing dancer and she didn't want to learn to do that... I was dieing inside.

Yep, who I might marry doesn't have to be a carbon copy of me, just has to have some of the similar tastes and an appreciation for the style, that's all. Because, if not, soon as the wedding is over, some how they’ll get me to sell my old car and clothes… no thanks!

=WR=

Root,

First of all, let me just say that although I have never met you, you seem to be an incredibly wonderful, warm and genuine person. It sure will be one lucky lady who ends up as Mrs. WR!!!

I believe that there is someone out there for all of us! This is a big country, a big world with lots and lots of women. Your lady is out there somewhere just waiting to make you happy for the rest of your life. She will be well worth the wait.

I applaud you for being true to who you are, both on the inside and out. I agree that the best relationships are the ones where you have a true match with similar values, morals and ideals. To me, the rest is all gravy.

I know your vintage lifestyle is an enormous part of your life, rather than just a casual hobby. In many ways, it really is WHO you are. I would also encourage you (if I may be so bold) to look beyond the immediate vintage world, as you just might be surprised what you will find. You may find a lady who is not presently into vintage, but just waiting for a swell guy like you to introduce it all to her! (Look at some of us ladies here at the Lounge...I'm guessing that many of us haven't been always been into vintage, although we've found a home in it now.) I hope that makes sense.

I might also add that, like you said, you may not ever find a partner that completely and utterly embraces your love of the Golden Era as you do, but she should at least respect it and be supportive. For example, my husband and I aren't exactly into the same eras. He is a Civil War reenactor, and I love WWII and the Golden Era. Although we both share an interest for those two eras, he is more into one and I am more into the other. Together, we do attend events for both, read books on both, talk about both, but at the end of the day he would rather listen to Fife and Drum music than Glenn Miller. And I would rather look at vintage swing dresses than hobnail brogans. Somehow it all comes together though, because the deep commonality is that we share a love of history and of the past--he just goes a little further back than I.

I really do wish you all of the very best,

Jessica

P.S. Please no offense to anyone intended, but have you thought about moving or exploring the prospects in parts of the country other than CA? Maybe the Midwest or the South? I think you might find lots of ladies who share your same value system!
 

Wild Root

Gone Home
Messages
5,532
Location
Monrovia California.
VintageJess said:
Root,

First of all, let me just say that although I have never met you, you seem to be an incredibly wonderful, warm and genuine person. It sure will be one lucky lady who ends up as Mrs. WR!!!

I believe that there is someone out there for all of us! This is a big country, a big world with lots and lots of women. Your lady is out there somewhere just waiting to make you happy for the rest of your life. She will be well worth the wait.

I applaud you for being true to who you are, both on the inside and out. I agree that the best relationships are the ones where you have a true match with similar values, morals and ideals. To me, the rest is all gravy.

I know your vintage lifestyle is an enormous part of your life, rather than just a casual hobby. In many ways, it really is WHO you are. I would also encourage you (if I may be so bold) to look beyond the immediate vintage world, as you just might be surprised what you will find. You may find a lady who is not presently into vintage, but just waiting for a swell guy like you to introduce it all to her! (Look at some of us ladies here at the Lounge...I'm guessing that many of us haven't been always been into vintage, although we've found a home in it now.) I hope that makes sense.

I might also add that, like you said, you may not ever find a partner that completely and utterly embraces your love of the Golden Era as you do, but she should at least respect it and be supportive. For example, my husband and I aren't exactly into the same eras. He is a Civil War reenactor, and I love WWII and the Golden Era. Although we both share an interest for those two eras, he is more into one and I am more into the other. Together, we do attend events for both, read books on both, talk about both, but at the end of the day he would rather listen to Fife and Drum music than Glenn Miller. And I would rather look at vintage swing dresses than hobnail brogans. Somehow it all comes together though, because the deep commonality is that we share a love of history and of the past--he just goes a little further back than I.

I really do wish you all of the very best,

Jessica

P.S. Please no offense to anyone intended, but have you thought about moving or exploring the prospects in parts of the country other than CA? Maybe the Midwest or the South? I think you might find lots of ladies who share your same value system!


Thank you so much! You’re so sweet to say all those things… You know me with out even meeting me… you read people very well. Bless you!

I have thought of moving to another part of the US… things are always different out side CA… but, the cash is lousy right now and I’m not at liberty to up and move… it’s not fun.

Great advice… Solid! You’re one swell dish!

=WR=
 

Tony in Tarzana

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,276
Location
Baldwin Park California USA
Some enchanted evening
You may see a stranger,
you may see a stranger
Across a crowded room
And somehow you know,
You know even then
That somewhere you'll see her
Again and again.

Some enchanted evening
Someone may be laughin',
You may hear her laughin'
Across a crowded room
And night after night,
As strange as it seems
The sound of her laughter
Will sing in your dreams.

Who can explain it?
Who can tell you why?
Fools give you reasons,
Wise men never try.

Some enchanted evening
When you find your true love,
When you feel her call you
Across a crowded room,
Then fly to her side,
And make her your own
For all through your life you
May dream all alone.

Once you have found her,
Never let her go.
Once you have found her,
Never let her go!


- Oscar Hammerstein II



Yeah, I know, what a load of bull. lol
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
Messages
33,835
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
Wild Root said:
Nah, I think I'm out of her league. ;)

***blushing fiercely***

Root, you're a true gentleman. A lot of guys would've said something like "aw, she's old enough to be my mother!" But you're too classy for that, and I'm going to run into the other room now and put a hat on, just so I can take it off to you.

Everyone here's had some good advice, and I hope you'll pay them mind. I agree with Jess's suggestion that you might do better away from California. I lived out there myself back in the early '80s and felt terribly out of place -- I can only imagine what it's like now.

But wherever you are and wherever you end up, keep in mind that there really are women out there who are looking for just the type of guy you are. In a world full of overripe frat boys, self-obsessed emo whiners, and flea-bitten hippies, clean-cut fellows like you are all too few and far between.
 

Pilgrim

One Too Many
Messages
1,719
Location
Fort Collins, CO
ortega76 said:
I work in retail management and I have a uniform (polo and khaki pants). The only vintage people see are my hats (I usually wear a driver's cap or stingy fedora).

Ortega, I think that's a pretty cool look, myself. I work at a university and summers are golf-shirt or sport-shirt time. Hats look good with 'em.

And I encourage Wild Root to take his time and enjoy looking. More people make mistakes by getting married too early than they do by waiting. The older you get, the better the decisions you will make in that department.
 

mysterygal

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,667
Location
Washington
Marc Chevalier said:
More and more, my wife is finding this vintage thing a bit silly and pretentious. She doesn't enjoy going to events where lots of people dress in vintage clothing. I tend to go alone. Luckily, I have friends who do like this stuff, so all's well.

.
Well, hopefully she'll come around and in the very least, humor you. Going through the same thing with the hubby..he doesn't really like vintage dresses and thinks the whole thing is silly and just a 'phase'.
I have seen some light at the end of the tunnel though...MK has given him a couple of nice hats (the hubby is purely a baseball cap wearer) and lately, he's been wearing them.:eusa_clap
 

J. M. Stovall

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,152
Location
Historic Heights Houston, Tejas
Marc Chevalier said:
More and more, my wife is finding this vintage thing a bit silly and pretentious. She doesn't enjoy going to events where lots of people dress in vintage clothing. I tend to go alone. Luckily, I have friends who do like this stuff, so all's well.

.

Just put the Pod next to her while she's sleeping, and when she wakes up she'll be one of us, mwa ha ha ha ha!
 

matei

One Too Many
Messages
1,022
Location
England
No suffering here - except for my bank account ;-)

Sometimes I get the odd comment - usually about my hat or tie. There have been times where miscreants have tried to rob the hat off me head, but in general people don't notice that I'm any different than they are. Then again, this is London - so often anything goes.

I have to admit that my sudden headlong plunge into vintage style and all that entails did freak my wife out a bit. I had to explain that I was making up of 20 years of wasted time. :p She has come to accept it and encourage my *ahem* classic and refined tastes.

I've worn hats to job interviews, and oddly enough I was offered the job each time! I wear what I wear to my job now and, aside from some good natured slagging, no one seems to mind or notice.
 

Paisley

I'll Lock Up
Messages
5,439
Location
Indianapolis
Wild Root said:
I have thought of moving to another part of the US… things are always different out side CA… but, the cash is lousy right now and I’m not at liberty to up and move… it’s not fun.
=WR=

Root, I know a number of Californians who have moved to Colorado because it's much more affordable to live here. They really like it here. People here aren't very stylish, but they do tend to be down to earth. You can swing dance nearly any night of the week, too. Just something to consider.
 

Wild Root

Gone Home
Messages
5,532
Location
Monrovia California.
LizzieMaine said:
***blushing fiercely***

Root, you're a true gentleman. A lot of guys would've said something like "aw, she's old enough to be my mother!" But you're too classy for that, and I'm going to run into the other room now and put a hat on, just so I can take it off to you.

Everyone here's had some good advice, and I hope you'll pay them mind. I agree with Jess's suggestion that you might do better away from California. I lived out there myself back in the early '80s and felt terribly out of place -- I can only imagine what it's like now.

But wherever you are and wherever you end up, keep in mind that there really are women out there who are looking for just the type of guy you are. In a world full of overripe frat boys, self-obsessed emo whiners, and flea-bitten hippies, clean-cut fellows like you are all too few and far between.

Well, I'd never say any thing smart or hurtful to some one as nice as you Miss, I respect ya and well, know you're a rare member of the vintage world and consider you a valuable comrade. After seeing photos of your kitchen and the great style you have, I'm just impressed by it all!;)

Yes, CA is an overly worldly place... old fashioned values aren't very common among the average. I have so many friends here, it be very hard to leave... but, who knows what's in store for ol' Root.

Thanks again for all the kind words!

=WR=
 

Wild Root

Gone Home
Messages
5,532
Location
Monrovia California.
Paisley said:
Root, I know a number of Californians who have moved to Colorado because it's much more affordable to live here. They really like it here. People here aren't very stylish, but they do tend to be down to earth. You can swing dance nearly any night of the week, too. Just something to consider.

I've only been to Colorado a few times... and it was just the Denver Airport.lol So, I guess that doesn't really count... I've wanted to check out Colorado... never had the chance! I'm sure I'd dig it but, moving is something I really cant do as of yet. Finding a job in another place is hard... my specialties are limited so, that narrows the field down a great deal. Also, finding a place that can work on my '46 is another challenge.

I wont rule it out but, a move for me isn't the right thing right now.;) To many responsibilities and obligations I'm afraid.

=WR=
 

Caledonia

Practically Family
Messages
954
Location
Scotland
What is this, a Root appreciation society?! ;) Maybe you need to think bigger and be on the other side of the Atlantic. Get your water wings on and kick those legs! :) Seriously though, you are a "knight of my heart", but don't let Husband in on that :D

On topic.... there may be a benefit to getting to, ok past 40. You've learned who you are, what you are, and you're progressively more happy with it. I'm really just paraphrasing LizzieMaine here, and can't say it better. The only personal addition would be that I think if you're are happy with who you are, and that teensy bit older (really, really teensy), adverse comments don't tend to happen as much because you (1) don't care, and (2) have developed a "Freezes the Clyde" (insert whatever big river you have) look that really stops it dead! But I admit, apart from my faithful Tilley hat, I am still really nervous about wearing hats in public.
 

mysterygal

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,667
Location
Washington
And another thing about getting a teensy bit older is that the teeny bopper clothes just don't look quite right on ya anymore! Unless you are going for the 'hey I'm 40yrs old...lookin' for a 20 something boyfriend' ;)
I love how classy it makes me feel and the compliments and nods of approval are just an added bonus! I'm sure the mister will come around...one of these days :rolleyes:
 

Forum statistics

Threads
109,667
Messages
3,086,316
Members
54,480
Latest member
PISoftware
Top