Dating: Do's and Dont's (1949)

[avedwards]

avedwrds your perspective regarding kissing is well noted. I, however, subscribe to the following:

"As Time Goes By"

"You must remember this
A kiss is just a kiss, a sigh is just a sigh.
The fundamental things apply
As time goes by."

© 1931 Warner Bros. Music Corporation, ASCAP


Se back then in the days before the mating ritual was conceived ( oops did I say 'concieved') people were kissing. Even in movie theaters. *yucky*

I may not have clarified. I see nothing wrong with two people who like each other a lot kissing. It's people on a first date making out at a cinema that bothers me, as they presumably don't even know each other that well if they are only on their first date, so perhaps they should talk instead.

Of course modern teenagers will disagree with me here, but unlike with silly fashions which I can accept I will consider them say they are wrong in this matter.

I thought making out at the movies is what all teenagers want to do?

Change the all to most. There are still some teenagers who spend dates more constructively.

 

[Carlisle Blues]

I may not have clarified. I see nothing wrong with two people who like each other a lot kissing. It's people on a first date making out at a cinema that bothers me, as they presumably don't even know each other that well if they are only on their first date, so perhaps they should talk instead.

Of course modern teenagers will disagree with me here, but unlike with silly fashions which I can accept I will consider them say they are wrong in this matter.


Change the all to most. There are still some teenagers who spend dates more constructively.

Is it acceptable if when the date is concluded a gentleman gives his date the most gentle, sweetest kiss on the cheek or even her hand if he has permission?? [huh]

 

[Sertsa]

This is a pretty enlightening conversation. Thanks. I've always felt I've been socially awkward, too, and overly shy about many things. That's kind of odd sounding to a lot of people who know me, because I can also be very funny, talkative, witty and even charming, particularly if it's in a setting in which I'm fairly comfortable.

But that extra step in dating and realizing that I may actually have a woman's interest seems difficult. I'm not sure why. I'm typically confident enough, and when I'm getting to know someone, I'm good at the conversation, especially asking questions (since I'm fascinated with people and what makes them smile), but it may stem from my lack of confidence when I was a teenager (I had some surgeries and was overweight). Maybe I'm just kind of a goof.

At any rate, the best dates I have had have been doing things where we mainly had time to talk or wander around. My best memories are driving and then walking around looking at Christmas lights, sitting on a fence under the moonlight, and winding up at the top floor of a building and watching the sunrise (in college, at a music convention, after being out all night). Come to think of it, I never had a real movie date. Movie groups, sure, but not a movie date.

OK, I wrote far more than planned, so I'll shut up.

 

[Foofoogal]

I think dating is a nightmare, too! I recently went on a second date with a guy who hasn't tried to kiss me yet, and I couldn't help but think that he's just not that interested. On the one hand, I have always hoped to just go on a few friendly, low-pressure dates with a guy I barely know without him getting handsy right off the bat. On the other hand, I have not heard from him since. Hmm...

Cannot say for sure but will say he may be more crazy about you than you think but scared.
My husband told me I was the only one that told him "NO" (though it was tough.)lol
When my son first started dating our DIL he ran scared and dropped her like a rock. I had always fended off girls calling our home for him but for some reason when she called and told me he broke up with her I told her it was ok that he was just scared. I still to this day do not know why I did that with her. Moms instincts or something. They have been married over 10 yrs.

 

[avedwards]

Is it acceptable if when the date is concluded a gentleman gives his date the most gentle, sweetest kiss on the cheek or even her hand if he has permission?? [huh]

I would say so, unless he is as unromantic and unconfident as I am in which case he leaves it at a hug. Before I sound like someone who thinks they know it all, I do not pretend to. I have been on very few dates, so maybe my opinions are completely wrong.

 

[JennyLou]

Come to think of it, I never had a real movie date. Movie groups, sure, but not a movie date.

I realized I have never been on a movie date either which surprise me because thats usually a big thing to do when dating. I prefer talking and getting to know a new guy and watching a movie isn't the ideal situation for that.

 

[Carlisle Blues]

I would say so, unless he is as unromantic and unconfident as I am in which case he leaves it at a hug. Before I sound like someone who thinks they know it all, I do not pretend to. I have been on very few dates, so maybe my opinions are completely wrong.

Rest assured you do not sound like a "know it all". In this journey called life, we are just asking questions trying to find ourselves and sharing with each other.

You seem like a nice person who is very respectful. Just wanted to know your perspective.

fftopic: BTW how is your leather jacket

 

[JennyLou]

Is it acceptable if when the date is concluded a gentleman gives his date the most gentle, sweetest kiss on the cheek or even her hand if he has permission?? [huh]

I think its ok. I would have thought it was sweet if a guy gave me a kiss on the hand. It's never happened to me, not a lot of guys do that anymore.

 

[FinalVestige79]

I may not have clarified. I see nothing wrong with two people who like each other a lot kissing. It's people on a first date making out at a cinema that bothers me, as they presumably don't even know each other that well if they are only on their first date, so perhaps they should talk instead.

Of course modern teenagers will disagree with me here, but unlike with silly fashions which I can accept I will consider them say they are wrong in this matter.


Change the all to most. There are still some teenagers who spend dates more constructively.

I agree here...it think its rather distasteful for teens to be making out, neckin', or what have you in a theater...well any place that anyone in public can watch you. Its just to me disrespectful. Of course, kids will be kids, hormones and all, hell I'm one of 'em! HA! There still has to be a sense of class especially at the theater...BUT Drive-ins thats a horse of an entirely different color lol.

 

[avedwards]

Rest assured you do not sound like a "know it all". In this journey called life, we are just asking questions trying to find ourselves and sharing with each other.

You seem like a nice person who is very respectful. Just wanted to know your perspective.

fftopic: BTW how is your leather jacket

I just made sure not to sound like a "know it all" as I did apparently when I gave a friend relationship advice, only to have my own relationship at the time fail, proving that I really don't know much.

You also seem a nice person and equally repectful, from the posts I have seen on other threads. Fatherly I could almost say, especially to Metropd .

fftopic: Thanks for asking. The jacket's still got the mark on it, and I have done nothing as I still find it wearable, even for casual smart occaisions. Now that I've got used to the jacket not being pristine, I find that the mark is hardly noticable.

 

[Brooksie]

This is a pretty enlightening conversation. Thanks. I've always felt I've been socially awkward, too, and overly shy about many things. That's kind of odd sounding to a lot of people who know me, because I can also be very funny, talkative, witty and even charming, particularly if it's in a setting in which I'm fairly comfortable.
But that extra step in dating and realizing that I may actually have a woman's interest seems difficult. I'm not sure why. I'm typically confident enough, and when I'm getting to know someone, I'm good at the conversation, especially asking questions (since I'm fascinated with people and what makes them smile), but it may stem from my lack of confidence when I was a teenager (I had some surgeries and was overweight). Maybe I'm just kind of a goof.

At any rate, the best dates I have had have been doing things where we mainly had time to talk or wander around. My best memories are driving and then walking around looking at Christmas lights, sitting on a fence under the moonlight, and winding up at the top floor of a building and watching the sunrise (in college, at a music convention, after being out all night). Come to think of it, I never had a real movie date. Movie groups, sure, but not a movie date.

OK, I wrote far more than planned, so I'll shut up.

What you stated above in red is me, except replace the word women with men

Brooksie

 

[Edward]

If I may be frank, I really don't see why it all has to be as complicated as y'all make it sound. I can honestly say that I have discovered the ultimat secret to avoiding those first-date nerves: simply never be attracted to anyone who actually is interested in you, then you don't need to worry. Simples! lol I don't think I've been on an actual bona fide date date type date since... eh..... well..... My dating history was between the ages of about 25 and 31, and I'm more than happy to leave it back then, thanks very much! lol

The only exception to a no-movie-first-date rule is Rocky Horror. Period.

Ah, but then dear Rocky is an exception to so many things in life....

I agree here...it think its rather distasteful for teens to be making out, neckin', or what have you in a theater...

Never understood it, myself.... call me cheap, but why spend the money on going to the cinema if not to watch the film? [huh] But hey, I much prefer them snogging than chatting on mobile phones or to each other.... For someone with over a decade's worth of experience in Rocky Horror circles, I am perhaps ironically increasingly intolerant of people talking in the cinema. In the theatre proper, it's a mortal sin in my book.

 

[avedwards]

If I may be frank, I really don't see why it all has to be as complicated as y'all make it sound. I can honestly say that I have discovered the ultimat secret to avoiding those first-date nerves: simply never be attracted to anyone who actually is interested in you, then you don't need to worry. Simples!

I've got to disagree there. With nerves I would say just be yourself. As in don't fuss about appearance any more than on an ordinery day (I can do this because I make sure to always look presentable even if I'm only at home all day). Wear what you normally wear, in my case I wore a suit and hat, no T-shirt and jeans as I don't usually wear those, in fact I haven't for about two years. Make the same sort of conversation you would with any other friends. That way you won't just try to be yourself but you will actually be yourself.

Again, I don't mean to sound like a know it all, but for me it worked.

 

[Carlisle Blues]

You also seem a nice person and equally repectful, from the posts I have seen on other threads. Fatherly I could almost say, especially to Metropd .

Thank you for saying that. I hope my 3 year old will feel the same way one day.

 

[Edward]

I've got to disagree there. With nerves I would say just be yourself. As in don't fuss about appearance any more than on an ordinery day (I can do this because I make sure to always look presentable even if I'm only at home all day). Wear what you normally wear, in my case I wore a suit and hat, no T-shirt and jeans as I don't usually wear those, in fact I haven't for about two years. Make the same sort of conversation you would with any other friends. That way you won't just try to be yourself but you will actually be yourself.

Again, I don't mean to sound like a know it all, but for me it worked.

I'm somehat more of a cynical bent than your good self, I believe.

 

[avedwards]

I'm somehat more of a cynical bent than your good self, I believe.

My good self? I'll let you off for that comment as you don't know me personally, but I am what defines a cynic. I just try to hide it a little bit here on the lounge as I think it would eventually annoy loungers as it does my friends. That doesn't stop there being moments when dating turns out successfully amongst the failure.

 

[Lady Jessica]

Mmm... I guess I'm just a nervous person. I can't usually understand why a guy would be interested in me, anyway. Not that it happens often (honestly), but it's nice when it is, even if I am skeptical. When I was younger my friends used to invite me places and then... not show up. So I get nervous it will be like that, and work myself up over it. I figure I'll get over it soon.

avedwards- You sound like a real gentleman.

 

[Brooksie]

Mmm... I guess I'm just a nervous person. I can't usually understand why a guy would be interested in me, anyway. Not that it happens often (honestly), but it's nice when it is, even if I am skeptical. When I was younger my friends used to invite me places and then... not show up. So I get nervous it will be like that, and work myself up over it. I figure I'll get over it soon.

avedwards- You sound like a real gentleman.

Lady Jessica - you do not give yourself enough credit, a guy would be interested in you because you are sweet, intelligent, sensitive, and you are very pretty plus it is obvious you have a great sense of fashion.

Aw... when I was younger I used to get invited to places too and sometimes they would show up and sometimes not which is most discouraging and those are the kinds of friends we can all do without - drop em like a hot potato.

Brooksie

 

[Foofoogal]

When I was younger my friends used to invite me places and then... not show up.

sorry hon. they were not your friends. kids can be so cruel. :eusa_doh:

 

[Sertsa]

JennyLou and Brooksie - Thanks. It's good to know I'm not all that odd in those respects.

Lady Jessica - When was young, I had some friends pull something similar. Despite being from a very small town, I kept them at a distance after that. I doubt anyone would do that know (to either of us) but if they would, they're probably not worth the bother.