drmaxtejeda
I'll Lock Up
- Messages
- 8,354
- Location
- Mexico City
[emoji815] I read that 4,153,237 people got married last year. Not to cause any trouble, but shouldn't that be an even number?
[emoji815] I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.
[emoji815] When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.
[emoji815]Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
[emoji815] America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote.
[emoji815] You know that tingly little feeling you get when you love someone? That's your common sense leaving your body.
[emoji815] My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that
[emoji815] I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been Googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
[emoji815] Money talks ... but all mine ever says is good-bye.
[emoji815] You're not fat, you're just easier to see.
[emoji815] If you think nobody cares whether you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
[emoji815] I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"
[emoji815] I can’t understand why women are OK that JC Penny has an older women’s clothing line named, "Sag Harbor."
[emoji815] Denny’s has a slogan, "If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us." If you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!
[emoji815] The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can go in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.
[emoji815] I think it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.
[emoji815] The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.
[emoji815] Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch!
Sent from my LG-H870 using Tapatalk
[emoji815] I find it ironic that the colors red, white, and blue stand for freedom until they are flashing behind you.
[emoji815] When wearing a bikini, women reveal 90% of their body. Men are so polite they only look at the covered parts.
[emoji815]Relationships are a lot like algebra. Have you ever looked at your X and wondered Y?
[emoji815] America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote.
[emoji815] You know that tingly little feeling you get when you love someone? That's your common sense leaving your body.
[emoji815] My therapist says I have a preoccupation with vengeance. We'll see about that
[emoji815] I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been Googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
[emoji815] Money talks ... but all mine ever says is good-bye.
[emoji815] You're not fat, you're just easier to see.
[emoji815] If you think nobody cares whether you're alive, try missing a couple of payments.
[emoji815] I always wondered what the job application is like at Hooters. Do they just give you a bra and say, "Here, fill this out?"
[emoji815] I can’t understand why women are OK that JC Penny has an older women’s clothing line named, "Sag Harbor."
[emoji815] Denny’s has a slogan, "If it’s your birthday, the meal is on us." If you’re in Denny’s and it’s your birthday, your life sucks!
[emoji815] The location of your mailbox shows you how far away from your house you can go in a robe before you start looking like a mental patient.
[emoji815] I think it's pretty cool how Chinese people made a language entirely out of tattoos.
[emoji815] The reason Mayberry was so peaceful and quiet was because nobody was married. Andy, Aunt Bea, Barney, Floyd, Howard, Goober, Gomer, Sam, Earnest T Bass, Helen, Thelma Lou, Clara and, of course, Opie were all single. The only married person was Otis, and he stayed drunk.
[emoji815] Money can’t buy happiness, but it keeps the kids in touch!
Sent from my LG-H870 using Tapatalk
