Claybertrand
One Too Many
- Messages
- 1,548
Here before you gentlemen, I offer you a peak inside the most genius invention this side of the ThighMaster: Boys, this is my secret, personally engineered, cheap guy hack for jacket hangers. Instead of patenting it and making millions so I can be wealthy, I say, "Screw that!!! I'm gonna share it with my fellow Loungers for FREE!!!!!"
This insanely complex jacket hack allows for you to hang your jacket without fear of it developing "points" or otherwise becoming misshaped because of its weight hanging on commonly used hangers. This is beneficial for leather and non leather jackets but super especially leather jackets
Ok here goes:
After years of development using wind tunnels, zero gravity testing, monkeys, stealth technology and the like, I stumbled upon the concept that purchasing Pipe Insulation from the Home Depot and using zip ties to affix it to wooden hangers also purchased at Home Depot can result in a hanger that is effective and cheap. Sure you can urinate your dinero away on some FANCY SCHMANCY over priced heavy duty hangers if you have one or two nice jackets. But when your collection hits triple digits, maybe you'd rather have a realistic and reasonable hanger you can DIY on the cheap. Am I right???? Of course I am!!!!!
SO, look no further. Here's the skinny:
1.) Hangers--Wooden Hangers in the Closet Organizing section of Home Depot come in I believe 5 paks and they are cheap. Are they the BEST hanger you've ever held in your hand??? I'll be honest: I don't know what you've held in your hand. But the hangers are OK. Not supremely excellent--but workable and better than plastic or wired basic hangers. You can also use higher end jacket or suit hangers plastic or wood you already own. See that, savin you EVEN MORE money already!! Hot Damn!!
2.) Pipe Insulation-- Grey Foam pipe insulation in the Plumbing section of Home Depot comes in 6 ft lengths for cheap. It comes in different diameters and I believe I used 3/4". I used what fit best on the hanger which when you think about it, is just genius on my part--no gettin around that. Spoiler Alert: You end up cutting the pipe insulation in about 10" lengths and use 2 per hanger.
3.) Small Zip Ties--(Not the big ones you use in your Sex Dungeon) These can be purchased anywhere but Home Depot has them in various amounts in the Electrical department. You only need them to be big enough to tightly bind the foam pipe insulation around the hanger--you'll cut off the rest so get the smallest ones you can use.
Directions:
Ok, the deal is, you cut the pipe insulation into 10" (10 inch) pieces with scissors. Then you take one piece of the foam, and one hanger. Now find roughly on the descending angled part of the hanger where the thickness of the wood thins to a consistent size. Slip the hanger into the pipe insulation starting at this point and insert the entire hanger letting the foam insulation extend beyond the end of the hanger 2.25-2.5". It should fit snugly.
Then, making sure to keep the opening in the pipe insulation on the underside of the wood of the hanger, wrap a zip tie around the pipe insulation 2-3 inches down from the top end. Take care to ensure that your zip tie lock area, once cinched, will end up on the underside of the hanger close to or on the slit opening of the insulation. This will ensure when you cut off the zip tie, you don't leave a sharp barb at on top of the hanger to dig into your jacket (See, ain't my first Rodeo). Now once you have cinched your zip tie to the Max, you can clip off the remaining plastic from the zip tie. Repeat this process on the other symmetrical side of the hanger and then, have a beer because you're a freakin' LEGEND!!!!
This hanger might LOOK kinda over sized and weird. But looks aren't everything (thank god). The design is such that the soft foam envelopes the hard surfaces of the hanger that would normally dig into a heavy garment like leather and cause it to stretch and permanently misshape. The Key though is the revolutionary over extension of the foam beyond the hanger end which ensures that shoulder areas will be properly, softly and roundly shaped while hanging mimicking the fit the jacket would have around a human shoulder like yours and mine as much as possible--while still not taking up a wide berth in your closet.
Your jacket will fit better because its hung and stored better and in a shape closer to that of your body. Now you don't have to be "that guy with the pointy ill fitting leather jacket" that everybody in the bar/club is snickering about (you just KNOW people must snicker at that kinda thing).
Please see the attached photos that were taken during production of the final prototype and are the only photos known to exist in captivity.
Am I a genius?? Well I am in an exclusive club for geniuses. Not bragging or anything.....but I am a member of Mentos its only for geniuses and you gotta be invited........so.......
Now go.......Go and make these hangers and teach others to make these hangers and spread happiness around the world. Like the cure for Polio, I am giving my genius invention to humanity itself. This is the gift I give to you all
brothers.
This insanely complex jacket hack allows for you to hang your jacket without fear of it developing "points" or otherwise becoming misshaped because of its weight hanging on commonly used hangers. This is beneficial for leather and non leather jackets but super especially leather jackets
Ok here goes:
After years of development using wind tunnels, zero gravity testing, monkeys, stealth technology and the like, I stumbled upon the concept that purchasing Pipe Insulation from the Home Depot and using zip ties to affix it to wooden hangers also purchased at Home Depot can result in a hanger that is effective and cheap. Sure you can urinate your dinero away on some FANCY SCHMANCY over priced heavy duty hangers if you have one or two nice jackets. But when your collection hits triple digits, maybe you'd rather have a realistic and reasonable hanger you can DIY on the cheap. Am I right???? Of course I am!!!!!
SO, look no further. Here's the skinny:
1.) Hangers--Wooden Hangers in the Closet Organizing section of Home Depot come in I believe 5 paks and they are cheap. Are they the BEST hanger you've ever held in your hand??? I'll be honest: I don't know what you've held in your hand. But the hangers are OK. Not supremely excellent--but workable and better than plastic or wired basic hangers. You can also use higher end jacket or suit hangers plastic or wood you already own. See that, savin you EVEN MORE money already!! Hot Damn!!
2.) Pipe Insulation-- Grey Foam pipe insulation in the Plumbing section of Home Depot comes in 6 ft lengths for cheap. It comes in different diameters and I believe I used 3/4". I used what fit best on the hanger which when you think about it, is just genius on my part--no gettin around that
. Spoiler Alert: You end up cutting the pipe insulation in about 10" lengths and use 2 per hanger.3.) Small Zip Ties--(Not the big ones you use in your Sex Dungeon) These can be purchased anywhere but Home Depot has them in various amounts in the Electrical department. You only need them to be big enough to tightly bind the foam pipe insulation around the hanger--you'll cut off the rest so get the smallest ones you can use.
Directions:
Ok, the deal is, you cut the pipe insulation into 10" (10 inch) pieces with scissors. Then you take one piece of the foam, and one hanger. Now find roughly on the descending angled part of the hanger where the thickness of the wood thins to a consistent size. Slip the hanger into the pipe insulation starting at this point and insert the entire hanger letting the foam insulation extend beyond the end of the hanger 2.25-2.5". It should fit snugly.
Then, making sure to keep the opening in the pipe insulation on the underside of the wood of the hanger, wrap a zip tie around the pipe insulation 2-3 inches down from the top end. Take care to ensure that your zip tie lock area, once cinched, will end up on the underside of the hanger close to or on the slit opening of the insulation. This will ensure when you cut off the zip tie, you don't leave a sharp barb at on top of the hanger to dig into your jacket (See, ain't my first Rodeo
). Now once you have cinched your zip tie to the Max, you can clip off the remaining plastic from the zip tie. Repeat this process on the other symmetrical side of the hanger and then, have a beer because you're a freakin' LEGEND!!!!This hanger might LOOK kinda over sized and weird. But looks aren't everything (thank god
). The design is such that the soft foam envelopes the hard surfaces of the hanger that would normally dig into a heavy garment like leather and cause it to stretch and permanently misshape. The Key though is the revolutionary over extension of the foam beyond the hanger end which ensures that shoulder areas will be properly, softly and roundly shaped while hanging mimicking the fit the jacket would have around a human shoulder like yours and mine as much as possible--while still not taking up a wide berth in your closet. Your jacket will fit better because its hung and stored better and in a shape closer to that of your body. Now you don't have to be "that guy with the pointy ill fitting leather jacket" that everybody in the bar/club is snickering about (you just KNOW people must snicker at that kinda thing).
Please see the attached photos that were taken during production of the final prototype and are the only photos known to exist in captivity.
Am I a genius?? Well I am in an exclusive club for geniuses. Not bragging or anything.....but I am a member of Mentos its only for geniuses and you gotta be invited........so.......
Now go.......Go and make these hangers and teach others to make these hangers and spread happiness around the world. Like the cure for Polio, I am giving my genius invention to humanity itself. This is the gift I give to you all
