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  1. LostInTyme

    Clean Jokes

    A great comedian Buddy Hackett.
  2. LostInTyme

    Clean Jokes

    I was gonna tell a joke about the U.S. economy and the trickle-down theory. But, 99% of you won't get it. Last night I lay in bed looking up at the stars in the sky and I thought to myself, “Where the heck is the ceiling?!” Learn from your parents’ mistakes; use birth control. We live in a...
  3. LostInTyme

    Clean Jokes

    I went to the toy store and asked the assistant where the Schwarzenegger action figures were located and he replied, “Aisle B, back.”
  4. LostInTyme

    Clean Jokes

    Teach your children. Ham comes from the store, not the hamster.
  5. LostInTyme

    F.S. Biltmore Homburg

    I have a Biltmore, fur felt, Homburg for sale. Size is 7 1/8 U.S. or 57 cm. May have been worn once. Color is a very light grey, I think they refer to it as Pearl. Condition is like new. No stains, bumps or bruises. This one was manufactured in Canada. Comes in original Biltmore box, and...
  7. LostInTyme

    Clean Jokes

    I went to the Doctor for a check up. He looked me over, took my check and said time was up. Now I'm wondering what he meant. I need a haircut. Time was when I needed a lot of them cut. Went out for dinner last evening. I found the waiter being deliberately obsequious whilst serving the...
  8. LostInTyme

    School Sandwiches

    And yet, we all seem to remember, albeit, perhaps not fondly, those lunches constructed and packaged by our Mothers and Wives each day. Most carried them off to school or work, and happily consumed them with relish. It was life, simple, as it were, and we lived it.
  9. LostInTyme

    School Sandwiches

    Spam-a-lot, a Monty Python favorite.
  10. LostInTyme

    Do you like to watch Mystery Shows on TV?

    Objects in the rear view mirror are closer than they appear.................
  11. LostInTyme

    Do you like to watch Mystery Shows on TV?

    We've watch most of the ones you listed. We use Acorn and BritBox through Amazon Prime. Outlander, although not a mystery is a pretty good series. Once we got started, we searched for more, and found them. They seem to be better written than U.S. shows. And, the acting is far and away...
  13. LostInTyme

    Do you like to watch Mystery Shows on TV?

    If you like mysteries on TV, I have several to recommend. First, there are three series that are related. Inspector Morse was the first followed by Lewis and again followed by Endeavour. Now, comes the hitch. Endeavour is actually a prequel to Inspector Morse, being the accountings of young...
  14. LostInTyme

    Clean Jokes

    ANGER! I am angry with misanthropic people. They just tick me off.
  15. LostInTyme

    Vintage Things That Have Disappeared In Your Lifetime?

    I used a slide rule for fifty years, even after electronic calculators came into being. Slide rules never needed batteries. And, blue prints stripped being blue around 1970. About the same time, project drawings started showing up being drawn by large format printers.
  16. LostInTyme

    Was Thesaurus The First Dinosaur?

    I have too much time on my hands. No matter what I use, I am unable to wash it off. Gotta go now, the Cable Guy is supposed to show up sometime between yesterday and Friday.
  17. LostInTyme

    Was Thesaurus The First Dinosaur?

    Just because it always happens the same way. I expect it will happen again. Wait and see for yourself. Non-believers are always astounded. If something changes, notify me at once, and I'll change this post immediately. I wouldn't want to be handing out untruths. That's a job that is WAY...
  19. LostInTyme

    Clean Jokes

    Do you know the last thing my grandfather said to me before he kicked the bucket? "Watch how far I can kick this bucket." Why shouldn’t the number 288 ever be mentioned? Because it’s two gross..... I thought the dryer was shrinking my clothes. Turns out it was the refrigerator all along. I...
  20. LostInTyme

    Clean Jokes

    Lawyers should never ask a Georgia grandma a question if they aren't prepared for the answer. In a trial, a Southern small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grandmotherly, elderly woman to the stand. He approached her and asked, 'Mrs. Jones, do you know me?' She responded...
  21. LostInTyme

    Vintage Things That Have Disappeared In Your Lifetime?

    My first wife..........(no picture)
  22. LostInTyme

    Was Thesaurus The First Dinosaur?

    Today followed yesterday, and will be forgotten by tomorrow. Keep in mind that the here and now is but a fleeting moment in time, and must be treasured, lest there be no measure of it in the future. Dance, before the music ends.
  23. LostInTyme

    School Sandwiches

    I do the same thing with mustards. When I see a new one, I buy it. My wife is always telling me that I already have enough mustards to carry them off in my coffin. I guess she intends to have me "take it with me".

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