LizzieMaine
Bartender
- Messages
- 33,728
- Location
- Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
("Stop squoimin'!' commands Sally, as she applies iodine to an angry-looking gash on Joe's forehead, atop a rising lump. "I'm gonna kill 'at lan'lowrd," growls Joe. "I ain' one t'defen' no lan'lowrds," counters Sally, "but f'oncet it ain' his fawrlt. Ya jus' can't get t' erl!" "Well, it's bad enough we gotta sleep in ovehcoats," grumbles Joe," "but now it's ovehcoats an' a full suit'a cloes on unnehneat' it, an' ya can't even sit up t'get outta bed! I roll outa bed, fawl out, an' slam my head 'gainst a COLD RADDIATEH!" "Well," shrugs Sally, slapping a bandage on the cut, "you woulda yelt even moeh if it was HOT." "Now look at what Leonoreh's doin'neah," interjects Joe. "She's puttin' beets in'neh eaeh. Lookit t'eah." "Leonora, what'm I gonna do wit'..." begins Sally, before coming up short as she realizes that the red around her sniffling daughter's ear is not beets. "Wait a'minnit. T'is is -- blood! I bet she's got a eeah infection f'm sleepin' innis cold! I'm gonna KILL 'at lan'lowrd!")
United States and Australian troops have wiped out the last Japanese resistance in the Buna area of northern New Guinea by smashing a small enemy pocket inland from the captured area, reports from the front stated today. About 50 Japanese bodies were found in the pocket area as mopping-up parties combed cocoanut groves for possible stragglers from the force that defended the pocket to the death. Both American and Australian troops are now moving toward Sanandana Point, two and a half miles from Buna Village, to attack the last remaning organized enemy troops in the Papuan area of New Guinea.
British heavy bombers pounded Germany's industrial Ruhr for the second straight night last night. Only two bombers were reported lost out of the 100 planes taking part in the raid on the heart of Nazi industry.
United States war industries may continue to do their own hiring so long as they adhere to the official policies of the War Manpower Commission in doing so. WMC Chairman Paul V. McNutt warned, however, that if firms violate those policies, it may become necessary to confine their hiring, solicitation, and recruitment to the United States Employment Service.
(This will go over well...)
The meat shortage has taken its toll on the proud Brooklyn tradition of the beefsteak dinner, with members of the Men's Club of the Union Church of Bay Ridge forced to announce that chicken will be served instead of the customary beef at their upcoming annual beefsteak party. It was agreed that beefsteak parties featuring beefsteak "just aren't patriotic" at this time.
The publisher of the New York Inquirer will stand trial on sedition charges in Washington, it was ordered today. Forty-four year old William Griffin was among 27 other men and one woman -- Mrs. Elizabeth Dilling of Chicago -- indicted last July on charges that they conspired to undermine the morale of the Armed Forces of the United States. The Inqurier was listed as one of 30 publications, along with 28 organizations including the now-defunct America First Committee, as being agencies thru which American military morale was being attacked. Griffin had fought against removal to Washington for trial, arguing that he suffers from a heart condition, and that the trial would be too much of a strain.
(It's gonna be a long long winter.)
The Times Square Paramount Theatre reports "record breaking crowds" for the first five days of its present screen feature, "Star Spangled Rhythm," accompanied by a stage presentation featuring Benny Goodman and his Orchestra and extra added attraction, vocalist Frank Sinatra. The show set an all time record by drawing 25,000 persons for its opening day performances on December 30th, 34,000 for its New Year's Eve performances, and another 32,000 on New Year's Day. It is estimated that total attendance for the first week will reach 175,000. The Paramount is following a new policy of a special low admission price of 28 cents for all men in uniform. Approximately 2100 servicemen turned out for the New Year's Eve performances.
The Eagle Editorialist responds to Sir Thomas Beecham's recent criticism of Brooklyn's culture by acknowledging that "it may hurt, but is worth consideration." "It may ruffle civic consciousness to be spoken to thus," he admits. "Perhaps we have relied too much on our Gershwins and our MacMonnies. Maybe because Walt Whitman once stomped our streets we feel we must be sufficiently civilized. We think of our Academy of Music and forget to fill it." He further points out that the war has brought many new people to the borough, "who must judge us by what we are, not what we have been or what we have earnest plans for becoming." "Brooklyn must give them subtler nourishment -- food for the heart and soul. Nothing does this more readily than good music."
("It's too late. She says they've already made her a foreman.")
(My oh my, I hope Col. MacPhail has learned a valuable lesson -- never reveal your secrets in front of a Parrott. Meanwhile -- spring training under glass? Remember that "indoor baseball" league in 1939? AHEAD OF ITS TIME.)
(Ahhhhh, a Mystery Woman out of someone's sordid past! But WHOSE? Odds are running Doc Ballard 1-1, Bill Biff 2-1, Governor Blackston 5-1, Slim Worth 50-1, Mary Worth herself 100-1.)
(Yeah, here we go, Mr. Smooth Talk is the obvious villian. NEXT STORY.)
(The Scottish Sweepstakes? Hoot mon, thot's the woon where therrrre is nooooooooo prize a'tall.)
(YEAH YEAH IN A MINUTE I'M POSING FOR MY NEW HEADSHOTS. GOT THE RIGHT PROFILE, BOYS?)
(You'll get it soon enough.)