The Era -- Day By Day

[LizzieMaine]

"Hah!" scoffs Sally. "HAH! That Kampowitz! He's a bum! He wuzza bum when he'uzonna Giants an' he's still a bum! Petey got nutt'n ta worry 'bout f'm'im! B'sides, Petey don' waste no, you know, ennagy, on no spring trainin', he's savin' it faw'ennit mattas! An' he ain' no ol' man like 'at Billy Hoiman neita! Now lemme 'lone, I'm busy!"

And with that Sally returns to the pile of small packages on the kitchen table and continues unwrapping 48 cents worth of bubble gum she just bought in hopes of getting a new picture of -- somebody -- to replace the one she's been carrying in her pocketbook since last year that's gotten all wrinkled.

"Dammit!" growls Sally.

 

[ChiTownScion]

What crime did Harold commit? "A matter for the police?" Ma Lovewell is definitely one of those "I Need to Speak to Your Supervisor/ Manager " types that we now label as Karens.

 

[Fading Fast]

What crime did Harold commit? "A matter for the police?" Ma Lovewell is definitely one of those "I Need to Speak to Your Supervisor/ Manager " types that we now label as Karens.

I thought the same thing, what law? I am not sure about this at all, but back then, in the UK, breaking an engagement could be a legal issue, but I don't think it ever was in the US.

 

[LizzieMaine]

It would depend on the state -- "Breach of Promise" used to be a big deal but there were so many notorious high profile cases of it that states started doing away with the relevant laws in the '30s. We don't know for sure what state Harold lives in, but it's probably Illinois -- where Breach of Promise suits will be legal until 1947. But even then it's not "a matter for the police." Lena needs to shut her fat face, and hopefully that's exactly what her long-suffering daughter is about to do.

Comic strips got a lot of mileage out of breach-of-promise actions. Back in 1922, Uncle Bim got sued for B-of-P by a scheming widow who lived far beyond her means, and the storyline became a national mania. But there isn't much point of suing Harold, because what could they collect? A pocketful of IOUs from Shadow Smart?

 

[Fading Fast]

It would depend on the state -- "Breach of Promise" used to be a big deal but there were so many notorious high profile cases of it that states started doing away with the relevant laws in the '30s. We don't know for sure what state Harold lives in, but it's probably Illinois -- where Breach of Promise suits will be legal until 1947. But even then it's not "a matter for the police." Lena needs to shut her fat face, and hopefully that's exactly what her long-suffering daughter is about to do.

Comic strips got a lot of mileage out of breach-of-promise actions. Back in 1922, Uncle Bim got sued for B-of-P by a scheming widow who lived far beyond her means, and the storyline became a national mania. But there isn't much point of suing Harold, because what could they collect? A pocketful of IOUs from Shadow Smart?

And here's what I learned today: "breach of promise" was a thing in the US at one point, at least in some states. It seems, Lizzie, you're implying it wasn't criminal, so was it fought out in civil courts?

 

[Harp]

It would depend on the state -- "Breach of Promise" used to be a big deal but there were so many notorious high profile cases of it that states started doing away with the relevant laws in the '30s. We don't know for sure what state Harold lives in, but it's probably Illinois -- where Breach of Promise suits will be legal until 1947. But even then it's not "a matter for the police." Lena needs to shut her fat face, and hopefully that's exactly what her long-suffering daughter is about to do.

Comic strips got a lot of mileage out of breach-of-promise actions. Back in 1922, Uncle Bim got sued for B-of-P by a scheming widow who lived far beyond her means, and the storyline became a national mania. But there isn't much point of suing Harold, because what could they collect? A pocketful of IOUs from Shadow Smart?

A promise to marry is not a contractual matter, and its breach will not lead to recover objective loss; also, minors
may void promise to marry without fear of suit for breach, including after attainment majority. An engagement ring
is legally considered a conditional gift, and if not returned upon request may initiate civil legal pursuit.
A contract to marry pursuant to specific reason, community property, or antenuptial division can occur
and breach said avail recover.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Yep. Among the most famous breach of promise cases of the early 20th Century was that faced by Coca-Cola Company president Asa Candler, who got hit with a $500,000 "heart balm" suit in Georgia in 1923...

(Atlanta Constitution, 2/1/23)

The whole thing actually read like something out of a comic strip, especially when old prune-faced Candler had to sit and writhe in his seat while the plaintiff's lawyer read aloud fruitier passages from his passionate love letters to Mrs. De Bonchel. Uncle Bim himself didn't have it any worse.

It took over a year to resolve this case, by which time old Asa had become a national laughingstock, and that he actually won and didn't have to pay the damages was seen as small comfort.

"I have no comment."

 

[Harp]

Yep. Among the most famous breach of promise cases of the early...

The whole thing actually read like something out of a comic strip, especially when old prune-faced Candler had to sit and writhe in his seat while the plaintiff's lawyer read...."

The evolution of law as pertains above example and in general matrimonial engagement has been to focus
a more precise light upon "promises made, promises kept" in human affairs. Of interest is that said plaintiff was
married ? and defendant had social intercourse or sexual relations with her; and, if married, then committed
what the law terms Criminal Conversation if carnal relations with plaintiff. Since above resulted in a pyrrhic victory,
negligible was probable breach and cost, amounting to comic embarrassment.

 

[ChiTownScion]

But there isn't much point of suing Harold, because what could they collect? A pocketful of IOUs from Shadow Smart?

"There are two sayings you'll always hear around a law office.

#1. 'Sue the bastards!' And..

#2. 'Ya can't get blood from a turnip!' "

My Pre- Law Advisor

 

[Harp]

"There are two sayings you'll always hear around a law office.

#1. 'Sue the bastards!' And..

#2. 'Ya can't get blood from a turnip!' "

I believe Harold will pay a life long cost for his foolishness and suffer a far higher penalty exacted by conscience
for the love lost unnecessarily.

 

[LizzieMaine]

President Roosevelt today extended American protection to Greenland, under an agreement with Denmark which will permit the establishing of U. S. air bases and other military fortifications on the vast island. White House press secretary Stephen Early indicated that the decision to seek the agreement was made after Nazi planes were observed flying over Greenland, out of concern that the island may become a staging point for German attacks on the American continent.

Radio reports from Zagreb stated today that German troops have swept into the Croatian capital city, with indication that the arrival of the Nazi forces was preceded by fifth-column activity by extremist Croatian elements who have gained control of the radio facilities. The broadcast proclaimed the formation of a "Free Croat State" led by followers of exiled extremist Croat leader Ande Pavelic under the leadership of Slavko Kvaternik. Kvaternik was described in the broadcast as having taken over "full power" in the province.

The CIO United Auto Workers have agreed to the three-point plan put forward by Michigan Governor Murray D. Van Wagoner in an effort to settle the strike against the Ford Motor Company's River Rouge plant which has shut down all Ford production. Under the terms of the peace agreement, all workers will be returned to their job without prejudice, and three of the eightunion men whose firing on April 1st precipitated the strike will be rehired immediately, with seniority intact. The cases of the other three dismissed union workers will be personally mediated by Federial conciliator James E. Dewey. Grievance procedures established before the strike will be resumed, and a special commission will be appointed with company and union representation to address further grievances which may arise pending a certified NRLB union vote, and both parties agree that that vote will be held as soon as possible with full cooperation by the company. The agreement marks the first acknowledgement of the UAW's standing by the Ford company, the only carmaker without a union contract.

Meanwhile, the Dies Committee claims that up to $300,000 in "sabotage" was committed inside the River Rouge plant during the strike, including sledgehammer damage to precision instruments, jigs, dies, and machine tools. Acting committee chairman Rep. Joseph Starnes (D-Alabama) alleges that these acts were committed by "foreign agents."

The Amen Grand Jury has been investigation charges that up to $20,000 a month in "protection money" has been paid to Brooklyn police by racketeers involved in policy games, bookmaking and other illegal gambling activities. According to a presentment handed up to Supreme Court Justice John McCrate this afternoon, Patrolman John Kelly of the Bath Beach precinct refused to sign a waiver of immunity when summoned to testify before the grand jury yesterday, in violation of both the City Charter and the state constitution. A copy of the presentment has been forwarded to Police Commissioner Lewis J. Valentine.

The two "mad dogs" who turned Manhattan's Fifth Avenue shopping district into a battle zone reminiscent of the Wild West on January 14th go on trial today for the murder of linen-company executive Alfred J. Klausman. Brothers William and Anthony Esposito are accused of shooting Klausman in a 34th Street elevator and robbing him of a $640 payroll. Also killed in the ensuing shootout was Patrolman Edward F. Maher, but the Espositos are presently on trial only for the Klausman murder, for which, if convicted, they will face the electric chair.

(From the shadows, a tall man dressed in colorful East Indian garb and carrying what appeared to be a rolled carpet conferred quietly with a small thin man dressed entirely in black.)

A 23-year-old Flatbush woman has been fined $1 for allowing her poodle dog to run into the street without a muzzle. Miss Elsie Bruchman told Magistrate Jeanine Brill that the incident was purely accidental, but Patrolman Robert Boothby of Vanderveer Park precinct testified that the "accident" occured when Miss Bruchman opened her door to laugh at the plight of the patrolman and an ASPCA dog catcher who tripped and fell while chasing three loose dogs along Avenue T. Miss Bruchman's poodle took advantage of the confusion to scamper into the street and was apprehended by Patrolman Boothby, who did not appreciate being laughed at.

An Australian lecturer yesterday told the Brooklyn Rotary Club that famed aviatrix Amelia Earhart may still be alive. Explorer Keith Douglas Young of Melbourne told the club that he was the "last white man" to speak to Miss Earhart on July 2, 1937, before she took off from Lae, Guinea on the first leg of a flight back to the United States. Mr. Young stated that there are a great many uninhabited, but habitable islands in the South Pacific where a person could survive for years on fruits and other wild foods, and he believes that the aviatrix is living on one of them.

(And this isn't even the *only* serious musical work dealing with the Dodgers -- composer Robert Russell Bennett's "Symphony in D for the Dodgers" will be out later in 1941. I wrote a Dodger-themed script myself years ago, for a competition dealing with vintage baseball themes, called "One Wednesday Afternoon In Section 37," but I never thought of setting it to music. What's a good rhyme for "Coscarart?")

(Note that you get twice as much Pepsi as you do Coke for the same price. That's why socially-ambitious but financially-shaky housewives would buy Pepsi and then pour it into empty Coke bottles before serving it to guests.)

Bob Hope, Bing Crosby, and Dorothy Lamour are back at it again in "Road To Zanzibar," now showing at the Times Square Paramount, and Herbert Cohn says it's more riotous fun along the lines of last year's "Road To Singapore." The plot is different, but not by much, there's some good songs, but the outlandish shenanigans of the comic and the crooner are really the only point, and in a picture this funny, that's enough.

Reader George Durst says there's no time like the present for the many unemployed persons over the age of forty to get organized. The defense industry offers plenty of opportunity for the middle aged, especially since every job given to an older person frees up a younger man for more vital work.

(Nah, with a head of hair like that he's gonna be a businessman.)

(Earl Graser played the Lone Ranger three nights a week for almost nine years, and never once in nearly fourteen hundred broadcasts was he ever given on-air credit. When he went to see WXYZ president George Trendle about a raise, Trendle laughed in his face and said "you're no radio actor. I could replace you tomorrow and nobody would know.")

Leo Durocher won't be at second base when the Dodgers open their regular season on Tuesday, but it's possible he might be at shortstop, depending on how quickly Pee Wee Reese recovers from an injury to his left ankle -- the same ankle broken to end the young star's rookie campaign last summer. Reese's spikes caught as he was sliding across home plate at Oriole Park in Baltimore yesterday during a barnstorming contest against the Yankees, and you could hear whispers from the Brooklyn bench to the effect of "there goes the pennant." The chief bone surgeon at Johns Hopkins Hospital -- where Pee Wee's 1940 injury was treated -- happened to be in the stands for yesterday's game and rushed onto the field to offer assistance. Dr. George Bennett, after examining the ankle, ventured the cautious opinion that it hasn't been re-broken, and x-rays seem to confirm that. But Dr. Bennett wants Reese kept off the ankle for three or four days at least. If after that Pee Wee is able to play, he can, but the Dodgers seem willing to err on the side of caution given the boy's value to the team.

The injury does expose one significant weakness to the 1941 Flock -- with the roster now slimmed down for opening day, there is precisely one substitute available for each infield position. Jimmy Wasdell backs up Camilli at first, Kampouris for Coscarart at second, Lew Riggs caddies for Lavagetto at third, and only Durocher is available to fill in for Reese, unless Pete Reiser is brought back into the infield, which is a move no one wants to make.

Durocher says he has yet to make a final decision on whether Coscarart or Kampouris will open the season at second, but if Leo plays short on opening day, that's only to the good for Pete. Coscarart thrived with Leo playing next to him at shortstop during the 1939 season, and while he and Reese made a good keystone combination last year, Pete admits he missed Leo's on-field mentoring.

("As long as he don't take ya out ta play gin rummy," growls Sally. "Or any o' t'at nightclub stuff! Allat drinkin' an' carryin' on -- ya ain't Mungo, ya know!")

(Fortunately for Sparky, Doc doesn't seem the type to press his pants regularly.)

(Like the sun draws its energy from its seething inner core, so too does Josephine Bungle.)

("Croup tents" were still a thing when I was a tot, but we used an electric vaporizer instead of a boiling teakettle. And by the way, Mary, nice try, but everybody can see that this "Doctor" of yours is just Bill Biff with glasses and a drawn-on moustache. He'll do anything for you, won't he?)

("There isn't anything I'm interested in!" Oh yeah? Wait'll you meet the FACE EATING DOG!)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Pfff, enough with all this war junk. Where's the streamlined sex countess?

Those better be SOLID rabbits, or it's all off. Those hollow ones are for chumps.

Hey Hugo, been to Brownsville yet?

You'd think, after his last underground experience with that weird professor guy, that Tracy would know how to get out of holes in the ground. BUT DOES HE LEARN?

BALD HEADED OLD GANDER! BALD HEADED OLD GANDER!

Eagle? Don't you mean BALD HEADED OLD GANDER?

Wait, how'd they get the kid off the raft before the torpedoes went off? Did they have him tied to a rubber band?

That's all well and good, Lil, but you still need to kick your mother down a flight of stairs.

Word of advice, son. It's possible to outlast a boss who wants you gone and will stoop at nothing to get rid of you, but it's going to drain the life out of you. Just how badly do you want to keep this job?

Ann Sheridan says "Look what *I* have to do to keep *MY* job!"

 

[Fading Fast]

...The two "mad dogs" who turned Manhattan's Fifth Avenue shopping district into a battle zone reminiscent of the Wild West on January 14th go on trial today for the murder of linen-company executive Alfred J. Klausman. Brothers William and Anthony Esposito are accused of shooting Klausman in a 34th Street elevator and robbing him of a $640 payroll. Also killed in the ensuing shootout was Patrolman Edward F. Maher, but the Espositos are presently on trial only for the Klausman murder, for which, if convicted, they will face the electric chair....

We see it regularly, but it is still stunning how much faster things moved to trial back then. If this happened today, that January crime would probably not come to trial until late this year or, more likely, next year, or, sometimes, even later than that.

... View attachment 325766
(From the shadows, a tall man dressed in colorful East Indian garb and carrying what appeared to be a rolled carpet conferred quietly with a small thin man dressed entirely in black.)...

... (Note that you get twice as much Pepsi as you do Coke for the same price. That's why socially-ambitious but financially-shaky housewives would buy Pepsi and then pour it into empty Coke bottles before serving it to guests.)...

I wonder if any of those Thoro-bake picture set National Defense cards are on eBay, etc.? Considering how everything seems "collectable," I can imagine a "complete set" being worth something. Or, they were made on such cheap material that none of them survived.

...("As long as he don't take ya out ta play gin rummy," growls Sally. "Or any o' t'at nightclub stuff! Allat drinkin' an' carryin' on -- ya ain't Mungo, ya know!")...

Said as Joe collects his night-school books and, as quietly as possible, leaves.

... (Like the sun draws its energy from its seething inner core, so too does Josephine Bungle.)...

"...a woman who's been married so often that, I know, she has a charge account at the marriage license bureau." I love that Jo gets wittier when angry. A lot of people lose their thought process when angry, but not Jo.

... ("There isn't anything I'm interested in!" Oh yeah? Wait'll you meet the FACE EATING DOG!)

Lizzie, don't forget to write in your journal the date and time when you had your thought about the FACE EATING DOG! as you promised the school counselor you would do for your next meeting.

... Pfff, enough with all this war junk. Where's the streamlined sex countess?...

Separately, "The Neighbors" reverses the standard Golden Era joke about the husband insensitively buying his wife an appliance for their anniversary versus taking her out for a night on the town.

A... Those better be SOLID rabbits, or it's all off. Those hollow ones are for chumps...

And a related kudos to Maine chocolate shop Len Libby, I have, over the years, received both a chocolate moose and chocolate Easter bunnies from the shop and they were always solid. Otherwise, as you note, you feel cheated. Favorite Len Libby candy: toss up between Bangor Taffy and Needhams (chocolate-covered coconut).

...[
Hey Hugo, been to Brownsville yet?...

What the heck? It took some effort and money to write and send that in.

.. Wait, how'd they get the kid off the raft before the torpedoes went off? Did they have him tied to a rubber band?...

I wondered the same thing. From the illustration, the raft looked pretty darn close to the ship.

Hu Shee is my favorite (she's everything PLUS a Hollywood stunt driver), but Burma has pretty much knocked Raven out of the number two slot.

... That's all well and good, Lil, but you still need to kick your mother down a flight of stairs....

ATTENTION - (STOP) -WASP WAIST ALERT - (STOP) - PANEL FOUR - (STOP) - REPEAT - (STOP) - WASP WAIST ALERT - (STOP) - PANEL FOUR

... Word of advice, son. It's possible to outlast a boss who wants you gone and will stoop at nothing to get rid of you, but it's going to drain the life out of you. Just how badly do you want to keep this job?...

Word

 

[ChiTownScion]

I'm not convinced.

To me Lillums Lovewell is one of those "All's fair in love and war" types.... and it isn't. I smell ulterior motive.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Lil's expression in panel three is - enigmatic.

THe real tragedy for both Harold and Lillums is that they're toxic to each other -- each brings out the absolute worst in the other, and they don't have either the sense or the maturity to realize it. This is , dramatically speaking, some pretty heavy stuff to write into what's generally seen as a light 'teen humor" comic, and it has the potential to get even darker. I wonder if Ed realizes he's written himself into a corner with these two?

 

[LizzieMaine]

British expeditionary forces have gone into action today against German blitz troops in Greece, as Nazi panzer divisions knifed thru the vital Monastir Gap and drove toward Greek northwestern road centers. The British reports do not identify the point at which the two sides clashed but it seems likely that the forces engaged in the vicinity of Florina, just north of the Yugoslav border.

Meanwhile, German reports claim that Yugoslavia is expected to capitulate to Nazi forces within the next forty eight hours, with authoritative Nazi military sources stating "it is no longer possible to say that there is a Yugoslavian army. It is smashed and melting apart, with Yugoslav forces surrending by the tens of thousands." Informed German quarters also state that the Greek front continues to hold, although "a wholesale Greek retreat" is in progress.

A state of emergency was declared in Hungary today as Hungarian troops marched into the Bacza region of Yugoslavia between the Danube and Tisza Rivers, a territory formerly held by the old Austro-Hungarian Empire before it was ceded to the newly-formed Yugoslavian state following the World War. The march into Yugoslavia comes not quite four months after Hungary and Yugoslavia signed a treaty pledging "constant peace and perpetual friendship" between the two nations.

Two Amen grand juries are sifting evidence of police corruption and connivance in connection with Brooklyn gambling rackets, on the heels of Assistant Attorney General John H. Amen's proclamation of a new crusade against organized gambling dens in the borough. One patrolman has already been suspended and twenty others are being subjected to rigorous questioning over charges that hoodlums have paid an estimated $20,000 per month for police protection in connection with bookmaking, policy games, pinball machines, dice games, and similar gambling operations. Mr. Amen states that more than a thousand locations in all sections of Brooklyn have been identified where such games are conducted, including candy stores, saloons, garages, small restaurants, and pool rooms, although some of the operations take place out in the open, on busy street corners.

("What?" bellows Joe. "Reeza's HOIT? 'At's it, wait'll nex' yeeah!" "WHAT?" bellows Sally. "KAMPORELLI? 'At's it, I'm goin' downa canny stoah an' call 'at MacPhail! He ain't gettin' away wit'tis!" "You goin' downa canny stoah?" says Joe. "Don' go neah t'em pinballs! Amen'll getcha!")

Henry Ford himself may be the final stumbling block preventing resolution of the strike by the CIO United Auto Workers that has shut down the entire Ford Motor Company. The union has fully accepted the three-point plan proposed for settling the strike by Governor Murray Van Wagoner of Michigan, but it is now reported that Ford himself "has reservations" about aspects of that program, which requires the rehiring of employees fired for union activity and that the company permit a vote by employees on union representation.

Mad dog killers William and Anthony Esposito went ape yesterday as their trial opened in Manhattan General Sessions Court yesterday. The two accused slayers appeared in the courtroom for the start of jury selection conducting themselves in the manner of circus chimpanzees, swinging their arms and wagging their heads as they hooted and screeched at spectators. Bailiffs prodded them like zookeepers to force them to their seats, and when seated the two continued with their monkeyshines, with Anthony wrapping a soiled undershirt around his head like a turban and gnawing at his fingers, while William ate paper napkins and scratched his head against the edge of the table. The two are expected to pursue an insanity defense.

(I seem to remember a teenage girl writing in to "Voice Of The People" in the News last year to complain about the same problem, and she found that a big hatpin was an even more effective weapon, especially when aimed at a vital area.)

(Easter dinner doesn't seem like as big a deal this year as it was last year. I dunno exactly what the 10 cent difference between the Pierrepoint and the Midwood amounts to, but I'm willing to bet that Eddie isn't serving "Easter Eggs Stuffed With Caviar.")

(Or visit any one of our 1,000 branch offices in Brooklyn! There's One Near You!)

The Eagle Editorialist renews his crusade to save the sugar refining industry in Brooklyn, and urges that every possible action be taken to stop plans by the beet sugar industry in Congress to increase its subsidy by 20 percent. That plan, promoted by the beet-sugar states of Louisiana and Florida, should be seen as a direct threat against the livelihoods of 2000 local men and women employed in sugar-cane refineries in Brooklyn, and as a serious blow toward efforts by the United States to build a strong friendship with Cuba and other cane-growing Latin American nations.

The EE also urges all people, regardless of religious faith, to stand with the Jews of the world as the Passover holiday begins tonight, at a time when millions of Jews are prisoners in concentration camps, are degraded in ghettoes, and are branded as outcasts in nations that have fallen under the domination of a force more powerful than that which oppressed them in Egypt. "If ever there was a time," the Editorialist declares, "when it behooved all men of honor and courage and decency to realize that they are all brothers -- whatever their faith -- it is today. If ever the non-Jew needed to look at the ability of his Jewish brother to survive persecution and death through the sheer power of the spirit, it is today. That is the lesson of this Passover season for all of us."

(Parents Today.)

Pee Wee Reese didn't play yesterday as the Dodgers beat the Yankees in Wilmington, Delaware 3-2 to close out their barnstorming tour, but the young shortstop was in uniform for the game and, with his injured left ankle heavily taped, was able to get out onto the field for a pre-game pepper session. He is not expected to appear in the final three pre-season games against the Yanks this weekend at Ebbets Field, and it is still doubtful that he will be cleared to play in the regular season opener against the Giants.

Pete Reiser's injury in yesterday's game may mean that Dixie Walker will open the season in center field. The young outfielder pulled a muscle in his side taking a murderous cut at the plate yesterday, and he is likely to be out until after the season begins.

Eight new Dodgers make their first appearance in Brooklyn livery at Ebbets Field this afternoon to kick off the three-game Yankee series. Wearing number 15 will be Kirby Higbe, hard-throwing former Phillie who is expected to be the Flock's number-two starter this year behind Whit Wyatt. Number 10 will adorn the broad back of Mickey Owen, former Cardinal backstop who is expected to resolve the Dodger catching problems that have lingered since the departure of Al Lopez. Number 37 will be worn by Big Poison himself, and the number on his back corresponds to his age, with Dodger fans needing no introduction to Paul Waner, longtime Pirate star who has long bedeviled Brooklyn with his hard hitting and his fine fielding. Number 31 is Alex Kampouris, who is giving Pete Coscarart a serious run for the second-base job. Al was considered all washed up until he hit 36 home runs for the Newark Bears last year and attracted the notice of the ever-alert Mr. MacPhail. Number 46 is Bill Swift, much-traveled right hander picked up from the Bees' system in the minor league draft, number 18 is Lew Riggs, who is expected to fill in from time to time for Lavagetto at third base, number 49 is left-handed tobacco farmer Kemp Wicker, who was 18-10 with Montreal last summer, and, finally, number 48 is Howard Mills, a lanky Yankee from Massachusetts who went 0 and 6 for the St. Louis Browns this year. The Dodgers are taking a chance with Mills, who is, at least, happy to be out of St. Lousi.

(Henny Youngman wasn't the first "meta-comedian," where the rapid-fire corniness of his jokes was in fact the point of the act, but he certainly stands as one of the most successful. Read this article in his voice for best results.)

(Sixteen years before "The Incredible Shrinking Man." Bring on the giant pencil!)

(George himself was one of these prospective husbands, first encountering Mrs. Dardanella in the 1920s while under the influence of one of his many spells of amnesia. Jo, of course, never, ever gets amnesia.)

(Sue auditions for a role on "Our Gal Sunday." Not bad kid, but you gotta stretch out those pauses a bit. "Oh---Ted. How--foolish we've BEEN -- not to -- RECOGNIZE HAPPINESS when we -- HAD it.")

(Not bad, not bad at all. Let's see you lick your finger and stick it in a light socket to see if it's live. Here, get up on this aluminum stepladder first.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

It's not often that the Eagle does better than the News with a Page Four story, but the monkey angle was funnier.

I've been wearing this style of specs for many years, and it's very rare to have them crack at the mounting points. What usually happens is that metal fatigue causes a split at the bridge, and you only notice it when you start getting headaches because the frame is bent out of alignment because you rolled over on it when you fell asleep with the glasses on your pillow because you had to take them off to read in bed.

Well, if it bothers you so much, you could always read the Mirror.

Jeez, Pete, is that a newspaper you're reading or an old couch cushion?

And Burma is all ready to knock Kiel off with -- a reefer? Don't bother, he's obviously already smoking one.

Shouldn't the power have gone off in the cistern by now? Why are the lights still on?

Like a lamb to the slaughter.

Hey, stock swindler -- when you've cleaned out Andy, why not come see this guy?

Wait, Willie used to be a clown? Didn't they want the suit back?

Come on, you can kick harder than that.

 

[Fading Fast]

...Two Amen grand juries are sifting evidence of police corruption and connivance in connection with Brooklyn gambling rackets, on the heels of Assistant Attorney General John H. Amen's proclamation of a new crusade against organized gambling dens in the borough. One patrolman has already been suspended and twenty others are being subjected to rigorous questioning over charges that hoodlums have paid an estimated $20,000 per month for police protection in connection with bookmaking, policy games, pinball machines, dice games, and similar gambling operations. Mr. Amen states that more than a thousand locations in all sections of Brooklyn have been identified where such games are conducted, including candy stores, saloons, garages, small restaurants, and pool rooms, although some of the operations take place out in the open, on busy street corners....

I believe they forgot to put barber shops on the list.

... (Sixteen years before "The Incredible Shrinking Man." Bring on the giant pencil!)...

And I'll bet if we researched hard enough, we'd find an earlier version of the shrinking-man story somewhere. It seems like whenever you think you have the "original" version of something, an earlier version eventually pops up.

... It's not often that the Eagle does better than the News with a Page Four story, but the monkey angle was funnier.....

I was disappointed there was no picture of Roosevelt's new bride. If others were too, here's a pic of the happy couple:

... I've been wearing this style of specs for many years, and it's very rare to have them crack at the mounting points. What usually happens is that metal fatigue causes a split at the bridge, and you only notice it when you start getting headaches because the frame is bent out of alignment because you rolled over on it when you fell asleep with the glasses on your pillow because you had to take them off to read in bed....

Maybe the technology is just that much better today, as I have a pair with almost that exact set up and have not had a single problem with them in the seven or eight years I've owned that frame.

...
Well, if it bothers you so much, you could always read the Mirror....

Apparently, he's mistaking Lichty's illustrations for pictures of the Eagle's editorial staff.

...
Like a lamb to the slaughter....

"Kermit, hi, we hate to bother you on a Sunday, but your services are really needed...what's that, 'of course you'll do it,' you're a good frog my man, thank you."

 

[ChiTownScion]

The "here we go again" look on Pop Lovewell's face. Priceless.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Nazi legions clashed today with combined Greek and British legions beyond the northern stronghold of Florina today in the opening battle of a decisive struggle for control of Greece. In a radio broadcast to the Greek people, Press Minister Theologos Nicoloudis offered an assurance of victory in "a conflict of morale and liberty against dark materialism." Meanwhile, sixteen successive waves of Nazi bombers pounded the port of Athens, and the city itself endured its longest air-raid-alert of the war. It is reported that a Greek hospital ship was destroyed by German bombs.

The possibility that President Roosevelt may suspend the Neutrality Act to allow American ships to carry munitions into war zones was raised today after he declared the Red Sea open to American vessels. Representative Sol Bloom (D-NY), chairman of the House Foreign Affairs Committee, stated today that the President already has full authority to take that action under the Lend-Lease law, and he dismissed the possibility that the President will seek to further secure that power by an amendment to the Neutrality Act itself.

The fate of J. Richard "Dixie" Davis, prominent attorney disbarred for his role protecting the policy empire of the late hoodlum Dutch Schultz, may be shared by a number of additional Brooklyn lawyers, according to Assistant Attorney General John H. Amen, whose investigation of police corruption connected to the borough's gambling rackets has now extended into the legal sector. Mr. Amen indicates that he intends to go after lawyers who act as "mouthpieces" for gambling racketeers if those attorneys refuse to disclose the names of the "big shots" who run those rackets from the shadows. A number of such attorneys, according to Mr. Amen, have been reluctant to reveal who is paying them to represent "small timers" brought in on gambling charges, and such lawyers can expect to be subpoenaed to appear before an Amen Grand Jury in the near future.

A expected crowd of 30,000 persons will be on hand today for the opening of the new and expanded grandstand at Jamaica Race Track. The $1,000,000 renovation of the facility will provide seating for 16,000 spectators and standing room for up to 34,000 more.

An explosion at the Hercules Powder Company works in Belvedere, New Jersey early today was termed "an industrial accident." The blast in a small dehydration building killed one worker and injured four others.

A football star of bygone days is dead along with his two children and his dog, and police are investigating the circumstances of the deaths. Thirty-four-year-old Malcolm Bleecker, star of the 1929 Columbia University football team, was found asphyxiated by gas in his Bayside home yesterday near the bodies of his six-year-old daughter and his two-year-old son and their cocker spaniel. Mrs. Bleecker returned home from a visit to a friend and collapsed upon learning of the deaths. She could not explain any reason why her husband, who worked on commission as an insurance salesman, would commit suicide, but police stated that all four jets on the kitchen gas range had been opened.

Production at the Ford Motor Company's River Rouge plant in Dearborn, Michigan will resume at full blast by next week, with the settlement of the strike against the company by the CIO-United Auto Workers. Employees will return to their jobs on the condition that the company cooperate in every way with an NRLB-supervised election to determine union recognition for the company. The agreement by Ford marks its first acknowledgement of the union.

(One of my all-time-favorite character comedians. He'll have a big hunk of his prime years robbed from him by the blacklist, but he'll rebound and thrive in the '60s, '70s, and '80s. And he lives on Midwood St.? I bet he knows Sally's ma. You know, that loud Irish lady that doesn't think much of actors.)

(LaGuardia running as a Democrat??? The most anti-Tammany mayor the city ever had? Are you sure about this, Cliff?)

The Yankees snapped the Dodgers' pre-season winning streak yesterday, opening the annual three-game April series at Ebbets Field by edging the Flock 7-6 before 13,097 cash customers. Whit Wyatt, who will likely open the regular season next week against the Giants, was a little bit wild but otherwise highly effective over three innings, and Fred Fitzsimmons was his usual jovial and baffling self for the next three. The Yanks, however, got down to business against Tex Carleton and Bill Swift, and that was that. There was, however, plenty on the good side from Joe Medwick, who went three for four, and young Alex Kampouris made an auspicious debut before the home folks by sliding into Yankee second sacker Gerry Priddy so forcefully that the game had to pause while inventory was taken on the youngster's body parts.

("Get one fa ya ankle," growls Joe. "'At Kamposki, he's a doity playa," frowns Sally. "Petey woul'na gon'afta t'at kid. He'da knocked him ova, but wouln'a messed 'im up 'a nutt'n.")

Babe Ruth has accepted Ty Cobb's challenge to a game of golf for charity. The two faded baseball favorites will meet at courses yet to be selected to play thirty-six holes on behalf of a war charity yet to be designated. It's expected that one round will be played in the Boston area, and another at Detroit, with the third round to be played at an undecided location.

(John 2:10.)

(Yes, there were Protestants in Brooklyn, "the Borough Of Churches.")

The new Lone Ranger actually knows how to ride a horse and shoot a gun. The late Earl Graser, who played the Hi-Yo-Silver man for nine years, was skilled at neither, but his replacement, Brace Beemer -- who until last week was the nameless announcer who sold bread to the Ranger's legion of radio followers -- is highly adept at both disciplines. Mr. Beemer is a large, brawny man with a deep baritone voice, who was so large, brawny, and baritone as a young man that he was accepted into the Army without question at the age of 14. His age was not discovered until he was wounded in France and sent home. Mr. Beemer will be "eased into" his new radio role, with the program now running a story continuity in which the Ranger is wounded and able to communicate only in grunts and moans, while his Indian companion Tonto carries the action of the story. It is hoped by the program's producers that this device will help to obscure the change in voices for the leading character.

Incidentally, the Ranger will have a new sponsor next month, as the program begins selling breakfast cereal instead of sliced bread.

("Finally!" exults the Turtle. "Something to DO!")

(Funny how we never see Peggy smile.)

(I still say this is the biggest newborn I've ever seen. Poor Sue.)

(When Irwin's cigar sets his moustache on fire, I for one will laugh and laugh.)