The Age of Entitlement

[PrettySquareGal]

When did we transition from making polite requests and working for what we have, to demanding and expecting things to come to us freely and or easily?

Of course not everyone thinks like this and it's not directed at any one group but culturally as a whole we're spoiled brats.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Some time in the 1980s. It was a gradual evolution, but I don't remember people in general being like that in the '70s, at least not around here. But by the '90s it was in full swing.

And it isn't just a matter of kids, either. I know far too many people in their 60s who say things like "but I don't WANT to wait in line, I shouldn't have to wait in line!" all the time. Makes me want to make them wait in line all the longer.

 

[ThemThereEyes]

I absolutely agree. People have come to feel that they deserve this or that or not to do this or that, etc. They have come to expect everyone else to bow out of their way. They are really bad when it comes to free things, discounted things, etc. I remember one woman coming to me and rudely demanding I replace her freebie lipstick with another one, because she'd left hers in the car (in Texas, hello). She became angry because we no longer had any of the freebies left, as the gwp had been over for over a month. She actually expected me, the sales clerk who could approve nothing beyond cut and dry transactions, to give her the same color in the actual live, $24, product. She also acted nasty about it and as if it were my fault, claiming that I should stand behind "my" product. Well, I was only a messenger so to speak. In any case, when companies give in to that they only create the monsters we have today.

 

[m0nk]

Some time in the 1980s. It was a gradual evolution, but I don't remember people in general being like that in the '70s, at least not around here. But by the '90s it was in full swing.

And it isn't just a matter of kids, either. I know far too many people in their 60s who say things like "but I don't WANT to wait in line, I shouldn't have to wait in line!" all the time. Makes me want to make them wait in line all the longer.

I would have to agree, that seems to be the time when people (at least in the US) stopped caring about anything except what they can get for themselves. If the human race doesn't return to a collective in some way, caring about others, etc, then we're doomed...

 

[Flicka]

Reminds me of a friend who during a work meeting got tired of all the whining and reluctance to perform actual work. In a staff meeting, she told her colleagues when they complained: "Right, but now this happens to be a place of business and not a recreation centre for middle class 30 years and above."

It didn't make her very popular, to say the least...

 

[LizzieMaine]

The age of entitlement is three: "mine! mine! mine!". The problem is a large swath of society that has never grown, emotionally, beyond that age.

The best thing you can say to a kid who wants wants wants something is "No, you can't have it." It's the most valuable lesson they'll ever learn.

 

[dnjan]

Tell me about it! I teach at a University, and a few years ago I had a student who was consistently late for an 8:00am class. I would frequently give un-announced quizzes at the beginning of class, and he got quite upset that he was missing them and was getting zeros for his grades. He told me that he had a long commute to campus, and the busses did not run very frequently from where he lived. He would have had to take a bus a whole hour earlier in order to get to my class on time. So he suggested that I should only review previous materials and not give quizzes or cover new materials until after he had arrived.

Dare I mention that he was a business major ...

 

[gear-guy]

I agree with everyone here but who and what is to blame? Is it a persons desire to want more than he or she needs?, is it the lack of moral fortitude?, Maybe I am just getting older and I am starting to think like my dad used too. My belief is that people are just getting lazy because many things have been handed to them growing up and they were not required to work for it. I hope that it changes soon, but I doubt it!!

 

[LizzieMaine]

It's the logical result of the whole package of postwar values pushed by the Boys from Marketing. You Are What You Consume, And You Deserve The Best.

 

[ThemThereEyes]

I agree with everyone here but who and what is to blame? Is it a persons desire to want more than he or she needs?, is it the lack of moral fortitude?, Maybe I am just getting older and I am starting to think like my dad used too. My belief is that people are just getting lazy because many things have been handed to them growing up and they were not required to work for it. I hope that it changes soon, but I doubt it!!

I think it is all of that combined with businesses that okay things because they don't want to "lose" that costumer's business. Then with the internet and reviewing, there is that problem of embellishing and lying when a customer doesn't get their way (when they should not have). It seems to be an endless cycle. What I really can't understand is when people's entitlement sense and actions cause danger to themselves and others. Mostly by that I mean really rude and reckless drivers.

 

[Baron Kurtz]

baby boomers and after

 

[gear-guy]

Well it sure looks like we found the problem but will we solve it?, or can we. The influence of money and the human desire to want everything seems to have an edge over morality and I will give something up for the greater good.

 

[PrettySquareGal]

Well it sure looks like we found the problem but will we solve it?, or can we. The influence of money and the human desire to want everything seems to have an edge over morality and I will give something up for the greater good.

But look at your signature: "An uneducated man will rob a bank, An educated man will own the bank and rob you{ T.R.}"

 

[gear-guy]

Well I probably won't stay up late trying to change people, but maybe I can start with myself. As I write and read on this thread I realize that maybe I am one of the people I'm complaining about. I get greedy, want more than I need, and I will be honest and say that if someone offers it I will more that likely take it. I know that I am not lazy and have worked very hard, but I still have faults that maybe some see as the problems we are talking about! Who knows. OK that's stupid, I'm better than this current generation and so are you so back to complaining.

 

[PrettySquareGal]

Well I probably won't stay up late trying to change people, but maybe I can start with myself. As I write and read on this thread I realize that maybe I am one of the people I'm complaining about. I get greedy, want more than I need, and I will be honest and say that if someone offers it I will more that likely take it. I know that I am not lazy and have worked very hard, but I still have faults that maybe some see as the problems we are talking about! Who knows. OK that's stupid, I'm better than this current generation and so are you so back to complaining.

This thread is seeking insight, not complaints.

 

[LizzieMaine]

baby boomers and after

The WW2 generation doesn't totally escape responsibility, either. Middle-class baby boomers didn't grow in a Petri dish -- they got whatever they screamed for, and somebody had to give it to them. An awful lot of the toxicity of the modern era got its start in the postwar world.

 

[gear-guy]

Insight is the ability to understand and see the inner nature of things, often intuitively. Penetrating insight suggests an ability to perceive what is going on usually via acute observation and the use of deduction. Although I feel that I have worked harder and did not ask for as much as the current generation, My father said the same about my generation, and his father before him, so is our insight one of hubris or true wisdom?

 

[Gregg Axley]

I'd have to say late 80's early 90's.
I grew up in the 70's and most of the kids I grew up with didn't have the latest gadgets, bicycles, clothing, etc.
In fact, if you look at some of the popular tv shows at the time, from what I can remember, there were lessons still taught about the difference between wants and needs, as in if you "want" it you "need" to work for it.
My nephew and niece grew up in the generation I mentioned at the start of this tangent, and yet they were taught the same values their parents have. So they don't have everything they want, they have what they can afford. They make sacrifices for certain items because that's how life works. Their friends that didn't receive these lessons early on have a lot of problems with debt, and a lot of unneeded stress.
Unfortunately this character trait goes past the 20's to 30's crowd, as Lizzie has stated, some never reached the point emotionally.

 

[nice hat dude!]

There is the possibility that in modern times when both parents have to work to make ends meet and they feel guilty about having to leave the kids alone or with a sitter so they lavish gifts and affection on them and make them feel like the world revolves around them they grow up having all they ever wanted just for being,they then grow up believing they are entitled.Possible?

 

[PrettySquareGal]

There is the possibility that in modern times when both parents have to work to make ends meet and they feel guilty about having to leave the kids alone or with a sitter so they lavish gifts and affection on them and make them feel like the world revolves around them they grow up having all they ever wanted just for being,they then grow up believing they are entitled.Possible?

I don't think a child can have too much genuine affection, because love wants what's best for the other and so would generally exclude creating a spoiled brat. Maybe too many undeserved/unrealistic statements ("compliments", "appraisals", "Special Snowflake" etc) I can see, absolutely. As far as maybe stemming from parents feeling guilty, I can see that. But I think it's more about parents who themselves act like children due to a culture that celebrates immaturity as a birthright.