So trivial, yet it really ticks you off.

[Trenchfriend]

And unchanged, many men are made to mummy's-boys, I think. I'm an only-child, but happily, I don't became that. I'm absolutely same distanced to mum and dad, living my own life.
Especially here, in East-Germany, the most middle-aged people have got still these "socialistic mind", very family-harmonic-orientated. BUT, the problem on education:
They still don't seem to comprehend, that their children have to live their own life, some day! And, that parents have to educate their children to autonomous adults.

And then, you see >40's, which got nothing handled in their life, sitting together with their >60's-parents in their allotment-garden. That's East-Germany, often.

 

[LizzieMaine]

You can pick your friends, you can even pick your nose, but, unfortunately, you can't pick your family.

I like to think that we all have two families -- the one we're born into and the one we create for ourselves. There are people I'm far closer to than I am to anyone in my actual blood family.

 

[Trenchfriend]

"Family" is there, where you do let you fall "in the arms of trust".

 

[2jakes]

There are no hard rules in family relations as Tolstoy so astutely noted about unhappy families, but I've noticed, a lot of the times, parents are harder on their children of the same sex (fathers on their sons and mothers on their daughters) than they are on their children of the opposite sex.

An overbearing mother & indifferent father can do a number on a growing child.

I like to think that if there is any sense of normalcy established, was the fact that
I was mostly raised by a loving uncle & grandmother in an environment of
values & respect for myself and towards others as well.

I have never been one to follow the crowd. I can count on my hand a few
friends that are closer to me than my own blood. I am blessed.

I always wake up, mostly grateful, I can still enjoy the many physical activities in life.
I’m always learning new things.

 

[V.C. Brunswick]

"Family" is there, where you do let you fall "in the arms of trust".

If he were black he'd be my cat Prince Louie because he does pretty much the same thing as soon as I sit down. Especially the kneading part which, in the spirit of this thread, actually does tick me off a little because his claws are so damn sharp. lol

 

[LizzieMaine]

From a cat's point of view, it's not that his claws are too sharp, it's that your lap is too soft. Would it kill you to put on a pair of sisal pants?

 

[Zombie_61]

My mother has loved me without ever asking...what’s in it for me ?

I like her already.

I like to think that we all have two families -- the one we're born into and the one we create for ourselves. There are people I'm far closer to than I am to anyone in my actual blood family.

I absolutely agree, but I think I have a somewhat different perspective on the matter because I was adopted and have never had any "blood relatives" in my life; none that I'm aware of, anyway. Long story short, at this point in my life I have one family--the one I've created for myself--and I couldn't be happier about it.

 

[GHT]

You can pick your friends, you can even pick your nose,

But you can't pick your friend's nose.

 

[2jakes]

I like her already.

I absolutely agree, but I think I have a somewhat different perspective on the matter because I was adopted and have never had any "blood relatives" in my life; none that I'm aware of, anyway. Long story short, at this point in my life I have one family--the one I've created for myself--and I couldn't be happier about it.

I haven’t done this since I was a kid, but growing up I would sit at the kitchen table for supper.
My mother's memory is diminishing, but I know as God is my witness...
She would've set a plate at the table for you any time & made you feel welcomed !

 

[Zombie_61]

I haven’t done this since I was a kid, but growing up I would sit at the kitchen table for supper.
My mother's memory is diminishing, but I know as God is my witness...
She would've set a plate at the table for you any time & made you feel welcomed !

That's the way my family was as well, and my wife's family too. There was always room for one more without fanfare or fuss. As far as they were concerned, you were already part of the family.

 

[Stearmen]

My mother has loved me without ever asking...

what’s in it for me ?

Cherish the relationship while you can, it will be gone in a blink of an eye!

 

[sheeplady]

I haven’t done this since I was a kid, but growing up I would sit at the kitchen table for supper.
My mother's memory is diminishing, but I know as God is my witness...
She would've set a plate at the table for you any time & made you feel welcomed !

That is one of my goals for my children: that their friends are always welcomed at my table.

I know some adults that get upset and feel "taken advantage of " because their kids never eat at a friends house while they host the friends on occassion. I think (as long as you can put food on the table and you're not raising the other people's kids) that's a bit petty. If it's no more than once a week, and they are good to your kid, and you can feed them, I don't get what the big deal is. Chances are there's a good reason your kid doesn't go over there, and if you knew the reason you wouldn't want them there.

 

[scottyrocks]

But you can't pick your friend's nose.

You can if it's a really good friend.

 

[2jakes]

You can if it's a really good friend.

I have two friends that I can count on.
I am indeed lucky !

 

[scottyrocks]

I have two friends that I can count on.
I am indeed lucky !

Well, that's four fingers accounted for.

 

[2jakes]

Well, that's four fingers accounted for.

Took me a few seconds...
and I have to give you a “thumbs up” for making me laugh.

Not sure if what you meant is the way I interpreted,
but it was funny nevertheless!

 

[TimeWarpWife]

I still have the doll I got for my very first Christmas in 1961. She's obviously been "loved" and somewhere along the line her head, arms, and legs ended up on another doll body, but she's one of my most cherished possessions. A lot of other dolls came and went, but I always ended up making sure "Nancy" never got thrown away - I have no idea what her real name was, but she had several different names over the years, Nancy being the last one. I also have the musical teddy bear my dad bought for me in June 1968. I remember when it was because he bought it for me the same day Bobby Kennedy died and we ended up going to his parents' house that night, the TV was on, and I remember all of the adults being very upset. What a memory to have attached to a child's toy.

 

[tonyb]

That is one of my goals for my children: that their friends are always welcomed at my table.

I know some adults that get upset and feel "taken advantage of " because their kids never eat at a friends house while they host the friends on occassion. I think (as long as you can put food on the table and you're not raising the other people's kids) that's a bit petty. If it's no more than once a week, and they are good to your kid, and you can feed them, I don't get what the big deal is. Chances are there's a good reason your kid doesn't go over there, and if you knew the reason you wouldn't want them there.

Yup. Seems that some folks just gotta keep score.

My dad --scalawag that he was in many, many ways -- enjoyed feeding people. And he was good at it. It made him feel valued.

In the case of kids, the important consideration is that you got a kid here who needs to eat. You may not be in a position to help that kid in any of the other ways that kid could use some help, but you can put some food in his belly. And make him feel an equal part of a human community.

 

[JimWagner]

That is one of my goals for my children: that their friends are always welcomed at my table.

I know some adults that get upset and feel "taken advantage of " because their kids never eat at a friends house while they host the friends on occassion. I think (as long as you can put food on the table and you're not raising the other people's kids) that's a bit petty. If it's no more than once a week, and they are good to your kid, and you can feed them, I don't get what the big deal is. Chances are there's a good reason your kid doesn't go over there, and if you knew the reason you wouldn't want them there.

When our kids were young, and even ocassionaly now that they are grown up and not living with us, we've had our kids' friends over for dinner. We never "kept score" and were happy to have them. I can tell you that my wife and I are both good cooks from large families and an extra mouth or two at the table just keeps the leftovers under control.

Neither my wife nor I had parents who wanted other kids over for dinner and we're probably compensating in some way for that.

 

[sheeplady]

Yup. Seems that some folks just gotta keep score.

My dad --scalawag that he was in many, many ways -- enjoyed feeding people. And he was good at it. It made him feel valued.

In the case of kids, the important consideration is that you got a kid here who needs to eat. You may not be in a position to help that kid in any of the other ways that kid could use some help, but you can put some food in his belly. And make him feel an equal part of a human community.

Exactly. And if they are a good friend to my child, I *owe* it to my kid to make sure their friend doesn't starve. Honestly, I'd hope someone would do it for my kid if they were hungry.