Old fashioned guys

[Lady Day]

I always appreciate a guy holding the door open, giving up his seat, etc. But I am ashamed to say one time I was trying to open a garbage bag full of clothes I was supposed to sort through for a charity. I was having a tad of trouble but I almost had it ripped open and a male friend of mine reached to help me and I said ‘'I’ve got it.” and was a tad annoyed he thought I couldn’t handle it but now that I think of it it was a very kind gesture and I should’ve said thank you and I wish I had.

No matter our silly reacting guys, we appreciate you're being a gentle man don't give up!

Yeah,

This superwoman/independent/equal rights thing has got a lot of women messed up. Maybe not really, but I too find it hard to digest a simple courteous act from a fella just being nice. So I commend you for realizing your actions and if you do tell your fella friend, I hope he smiles and says thanks

LD

 

[Miss Sis]

I don't know if this counts, but I met my husband at a historical reenactment.

Ditto - he doesn't remember the first time we (briefly) met but the next we hit it off.

That was at Biggin Hill Airfield and he lent me an original WAAF uniform. Now that's gentlemanly behaviour, lending some girl you hardly know a valuable original uniform! lol

 

[Ada Veen]

the women's lib/gentleman subject is interesting. I have had partners that did not open doors, carry bags etc, because of 'feminism' (in their words) yet treated me like an intellectual inferior who had nothing to add to a conversation.

My fiance, however, ALWAYS respects my opinion, yet will also carry heavy bags, open doors and prides himself on being the 'provider'. I think that appreciating a gentleman and being a feminist can go hand in hand... we know men are physically stronger than us, and biologically programmed to protect us, but we also know that we are their intellectual equals, and the motherly, nurturing instincts are in no way inferior to the more traditional masculine traits! The idea that they are is one of the problems of gender relations - kindness is seen by many men as weakness, and tenderness as sappiness.

I don't know about everyone else, but I think that being kind, considerate and tender is a necessity to being a gentleman, and I find it very attractive in the opposite sex.

 

[scotrace]

Ada Veen, I think we'll make your post required reading for every aspiring gentleman here.

 

[Ada Veen]

Scotrace, I have found that the men of the fedora lounge to have the most admirable of personalities and would not hesitate to describe each and every one as a gentleman!

 

[zaika]

the women's lib/gentleman subject is interesting. I have had partners that did not open doors, carry bags etc, because of 'feminism' (in their words) yet treated me like an intellectual inferior who had nothing to add to a conversation.

My fiance, however, ALWAYS respects my opinion, yet will also carry heavy bags, open doors and prides himself on being the 'provider'. I think that appreciating a gentleman and being a feminist can go hand in hand... we know men are physically stronger than us, and biologically programmed to protect us, but we also know that we are their intellectual equals, and the motherly, nurturing instincts are in no way inferior to the more traditional masculine traits! The idea that they are is one of the problems of gender relations - kindness is seen by many men as weakness, and tenderness as sappiness.

I don't know about everyone else, but I think that being kind, considerate and tender is a necessity to being a gentleman, and I find it very attractive in the opposite sex.

You have said what I've been thinking for quite a long time. Thank you!:eusa_clap

 

[VargasBaby]

the women's lib/gentleman subject is interesting. I have had partners that did not open doors, carry bags etc, because of 'feminism' (in their words) yet treated me like an intellectual inferior who had nothing to add to a conversation.

My fiance, however, ALWAYS respects my opinion, yet will also carry heavy bags, open doors and prides himself on being the 'provider'. I think that appreciating a gentleman and being a feminist can go hand in hand... we know men are physically stronger than us, and biologically programmed to protect us, but we also know that we are their intellectual equals, and the motherly, nurturing instincts are in no way inferior to the more traditional masculine traits! The idea that they are is one of the problems of gender relations - kindness is seen by many men as weakness, and tenderness as sappiness.

I don't know about everyone else, but I think that being kind, considerate and tender is a necessity to being a gentleman, and I find it very attractive in the opposite sex.

Thank you, I couldnt have said it better!

I love it when the doors held open for me and I always try to thank the person for doing so. I love it when the man waits for me to sit before taking his seat, etc.

There are times though, that I also find myself overlooking those traits in the men I know and I need to stop that. I hate to take it for granted.

And I still find it quite funny when I get to the door first and hold it open for smoeone else, male or female. Completely takes them by surprise!

 

[Jovan]

Is it bad that I'm "chivalrous" to both sexes as well? Oddly enough, I get more thanks in return when I hold open doors for other men. Strange. As someone said before, I don't do it for the thanks.

As far as women's lib goes, I don't see it as a reason to not be kind and courteous. Treating women as people and equals is a requisite anyways.

I would just say that I'm a nice guy, rather than old-fashioned. I'm sure there were many j*rkoffs back in the days of old as well!

 

[VargasBaby]

Is it bad that I'm "chivalrous" to both sexes as well? Oddly enough, I get more thanks in return when I hold open doors for other men. Strange. As someone said before, I don't do it for the thanks.

As far as women's lib goes, I don't see it as a reason to not be kind and courteous. Treating women as people and equals is a requisite anyways.

I would just say that I'm a nice guy, rather than old-fashioned. I'm sure there were many j*rkoffs back in the days of old as well!

I dont think it's bad at all!

and you're right it shouldnt be a reason to be courteous to anyone period. But so many women have taken it for granted or else scoff at it when it IS done to them because they feel we should be independant.

Being courteous doesnt mean you cant be independant too!

 

[Harp]

Old fashioned sure.
Too old fashioned no way!

there's a fair Sheila....

 

[HadleyH]

there's a fair Sheila....

I know Harp! lol

 

[imoldfashioned]

One of my favorite attributes of the old fashioned guy is courtesy, something sadly infrequent these days. Every so often an incident will present itself when I least expect it though.

Once a group of us were walking to an offsite meeting at work and I was chatting about a project with one of the older men in the group. The traffic light changed and most of the guys started charging across the street. Without drawing attention to his actions the gentleman I was speaking with moved to my left (the side with the oncoming traffic) and lightly took my arm as we crossed the street. A simple action but it made me feel very cared for. When we got to the meeting I mentioned it and thanked him. We had an interesting conversation about the different reactions his manners had evoked over the years. I've written on this before but my heart always goes out to guys who get their heads bitten off just for trying to be polite.

On a similar note, for me walking arm in arm with an old fashioned guy is one of life's great pleasures.

 

[VargasBaby]

On a similar note, for me walking arm in arm with an old fashioned guy is one of life's great pleasures.

Oooohhh..how I miss that so. Or even walking hand in hand. But on the arm would be LOVERLY.

 

[MrNewportCustom]

Why are you women who like gentlemen so few and far between?

But now that I've found the Lounge and am attending the occasional event, I'm sure I'll find there are more of you out there than I'd thought.


Lee
_____________________________

"They may talk of a comet, or a burning mountain, or some such bagatelle; but to me a modest woman, dressed out in all her finery, is the most tremendous object of the whole creation." - Oliver Goldsmith

 

[Jovan]

I'm always careful about that unless I know the person well. Some people are very turned off by any touching.

 

[Miss Brill]

Could someone tell me why a man I know will let the door slam in my face, unless other men are around & then he holds it for me? [huh]

 

[Jovan]

He's a j*rkwad?

 

[MrNewportCustom]

Could someone tell me why a man I know will let the door slam in my face, unless other men are around & then he holds it for me? [huh]

H. Jackson Brown, Jr. has a quote for this: "Our character is what we do when we think no one is looking."

I guess he doesn't think you're looking at his actions. Or thinks you're no one.


Lee

 

[Miss Brill]

Well, he is on TV sometimes.

 

[MrNewportCustom]

Seems to me he's acting for his friends but showing you his true self. [huh]


Lee