Longtime Loungers...do you think the Lounge has changed a great deal?

[reetpleat]

I have come back to this thread repeatedly all day and refrained from posting any response. However, I believe the three sentences highlighted in red above do deserve a response.

I fail to understand how someone can write "I knew that this subject would incite a lot of hard feelings" and "If I offended new folks, please know that it wasn't my intention." in the same post and expect that to make sense. If the intent was not to offend "new folks", why was this posted in a public forum?

And, why is there the implication [above] that we need to be brought "to the table to talk about this great place and how we can make it better"? I, for one, see a lot of excellent discussion done in a polite and mutually-respectful manner in most of the posts by over seven thousand members in hundreds of threads. Perhaps it would be better to start a thread about whatever it is that you would like to see that doesn't currently exist.

I particularly appreciate the "new folks" who have responded, [even though they were not invited to] and taken the high road in doing so.

FedoraGent, I agree with you. I hope all who were offended will accept that you did not intend to be offensive.

In this season, gentility and grace, for which the Fedora Lounge is known, would seem to be in order for all of us.

I kind of agree. While Fedoragent I am sure did not mean to offend anyone or criticize, it seems a given it would change over time, pointing that out might suggest that there is something wrong with that and that it somehow shouldn't change or was better.

There are still many traditional posts, and anyone wanting to red up on the details of a 1939 jacket can look up old posts or revive a new thread. Anyone wishing to discuss a heretofore unmentioned element of said jacket cna always start a new one.

As morepeople join there are bound to be more posts of general interest and not of interest to any particluar member. But I imagine any member can find at leas some threads every day that are of interest.

So I don't see there is much more to discuss. Nothing to change except maybe the reminder to be nicer and more welcoming if we want to keep new members cominig back.

 

[M Tatterscratch]

"hey,you kids get off my virtual lawn"

lol

People talk around my posts still. I don't take it seriously,I just assume that I must have written something again that makes me look like an ass.

If it's something about velcro flies or booty calling-cards, no problem, but if it's something on the topic of Vintage, that's EXACTLY when I'd want someone - old or new - to stop me before I kill again!

Please don't talk around my Vintage ignorance - your sentences will end up going MILES out of their way!

T.

 

[FedoraGent]

While a newbie to the forum perhaps, as someone who knows who you are from way back (we have met once or twice and I know who you are by reputation and events, although you may not really know me) I can assure you and anyone else who may care, you are cetainly no newbie and are a most deserving and welcome member on this board.

I'd have to agree with this. Folks back at home know of your involvement in the Norcal vintage scene and ADSC. You're definitely not new at all.

FG.

 

[M Tatterscratch]

Merry Christmas, FedoraGent.

T.

 

[scotrace]

We just don’t want to have to stand there for thirty minutes before the bartender takes our order.

With 7000 customers, sometimes it's just easier and faster to point to the nearby table laden with what you are trying to order.

FWIW, I still feel like a new member, trying to make myself heard, and still get PM messages from more senior members calling me a Thread Killer because my innocuous post has halted a thread in its tracks.

Has the Lounge changed? Good Lord yes. Hitting "New Posts" used to get me a half page of new reading a day. Now it's two or three pages of posts to read every HOUR!


Baron Kurtz's suggestions are, as usual, on the mark.

 

[Rooster]

I have to say thanks to all the "old timers" that have taken the time to teach me about vintage clothing and the wearing of it.:eusa_clap I'm sure they have answered my questions for other people a hundred times before me. The biggest problem for new people trying to find out about vintage clothing is they expect to ask a question and have THE definitive answer immediately. Mostly there are no definitive answers to these questions, and that's hard to accept when you're new. Three of the giants of the board really helped me out in the beguining. Baron Kurtz, Marc Chevalier, and Wildroot. They gave me some basic info and a good shove in the right direction so I could beguine my journey for my own answers. The best advice they gave me was see and handle in person as much vintage clothing as possible. Then, look at all the old adds and movies you can, and pay attention to details. Now I'm finally to the point where I know just enough to be dangerous.lol But, I feel I can now participate in threads with out looking like a complete idiot like I did when I found a 1970's disco suit and was convinced it was from the 30's.....I again thank the old timers for being gentle.lol
Do boards change? Of course. If they didn't they would stagnate and die.
Now, the Observation Bar. Odd place. I like it, and it has also been a great learning place for me. All of my internet experience up to this point has been on gun boards and game chicken boards...... both worlds I'm very secure in and understand the people, mostly men. The OB on the other hand has alot of big city folk and Ideas that I've never been directly associated with before. I must say it's been an eye opener. Nothing wrong with that though.

 

[Senator Jack]

With over 4,000 members joining in the last two years, the odds are everyone is going to find their 'bad neighbor', and all it takes is one of them to make you put the 'For Sale' sign out on the lawn. I think a lot of the old members simply found their bad neighbor. Of course, I, myself, am someone's bad neighbor, too, but as a life-long apartment dweller, I do try to respect the rights of my neighbors. I think I know when the stereo's too loud and I try not to stomp my feet while I walk around.

I'm not faulting the change of the FL on the bulk of new members here - there are a lot of them I'd I'd really like to have exchanges with- but, unfortunately, there is a new upstairs neighbor who has his stereo at full volume and it has me covering my ears with a pillow. Perhaps the cops should have a few words with him.


Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[Twitch]

Change is inevitable in all things. As some one who has begun topics about vintage and non-vintage subjects alike all I can say is that people do not live by vintage alone. No site I visit has only threads on only site topics. All threads go astray just like conversations do when some says, "speaking of..." and it segways.

I have never alluded to having the interest in procuring a house full of vintage clothes beyond a few fedoras and a couple 'old style' but not vintage jackets. For those that are mostly all about clothes here they have their threads and I usually have little deep interest in like how an ascot should fit or whatnot.

I'm one of few that owns a real vintage car but there are like 2 poorly participated in threads that have meandered along for over a year. Should there be a vintage auto topic header? Why not if there is decent participation.

This site is generally participated in by mannerly folks instead of high school aged web trolls. That is the main reason I cntinue to come here. There are people with many interests to stimulate posting on my part so I'm happy with the variety.

Of course I don't like that the very few jerkos are compelled to horn into discussions that were going along quite nicely for pages and start trouble. If you aren't interested in a topic there is no need to challenge the participants as to why they chose to discuss it. THIS is a problem that has recurred many times. They stir up what was a leisurely discussion and a bartender closes the thread instead of just erasing the horn in persons' comments.

I don't see any problem with a topic like "This season's TV shows" any more than I do with "where to find vintage suspenders" because there are people interested in both subjects. As long as one group doesn't come along and make fun of the other for their comments we're OK.

I visit some very specific topic sites like a Packard mechanical
site. People there still have comments and discussions that stray well beyond the mechanical aspects of Packard automobiles. I hit some stuffy archeologically based sites concerned mostly ancient humans and civilizations and people on those have a "non-site topic chat lounge" as such. EVERY site has a vesion of the Observation Lounge, that "non-site topic chat lounge," yet I still see people getting chastized for talking about non-vintage stuff.

In the past 2 years I have been plagued with medical problems to where about a full year has seen me stuck in my house. I look forward to stopping by the Lounge more than any site due to the fact that there are a variety of people with myriad interests. Even if I am not invloved in all of them I like hearing about many of them well beyond just vintage stuff.

If it wasn't for some of the off the wall and fun topics it would all be incredibly dull paraphrases of "look at this cool hat I won" and "is vintage underwear a little too far to go?" Boorrriiinnnggg!

 

[FedoraGent]

Happy Holidays!

T,

Merry Christmas pal, and to everyone else, Happy Holidays!

With 7k worth of folks, there's got to be more than Christmas for some folks.

FG.

Merry Christmas, FedoraGent.

T.

 

[Samsa]

This site is generally participated in by mannerly folks instead of high school aged web trolls. That is the main reason I continue to come here. There are people with many interests to stimulate posting on my part so I'm happy with the variety.

[...]

If it wasn't for some of the off the wall and fun topics it would all be incredibly dull paraphrases of "look at this cool hat I won" and "is vintage underwear a little too far to go?" Boorrriiinnnggg!

Very well said.:eusa_clap

 

[Foofoogal]

I thought The Observation Bar was what other forums call the "off topic" or life lounge. The one where people meet & greet and talk about personal (or even non-serious) topics that do not relate to the subject of the forum's main title. I've never seen a forum that didn't have such a lounge, and it is almost always the one that gets the most posts.
__________________

This is what I thought also. Like a moth to a flame I keep coming back here as it is the most active place I know on the web.
At this point and not trying to sound rude I think religion altogether should be banned. As someone pointed out to me privately it is not a place to evangelize and this is how I was evidently seen.
I found this place because of selling vintage clothing and a natural progression. Thru my blog and my sites and sales I have suggested this place for those interested in all things vintage not completely understanding the emphasis on clothing.
I would like to think many of these 7000 people came at my invitation and would also like to think as newbies they would be welcomed. Though since I also do not hide my Christianity to my customers I would feel safer if religion was not discussed altogether where I send them as they may be expecting or not expecting certain criteria.
No way is a place of 7000 going to have the same type of people but fairness should be expected.

 

[pdxvintagette]

As one of the newest members to post to this thread, I'd like to admit that I may not know what I'm talking about!

However. It took me a long time to come to Fedora Lounge after hearing about it. I met MK at a vintage shop's charity event just about a year ago. At that time, I checked the site out and it looked positively terrific - but I was going through a divorce, and didn't have the mental or emotional capacity for building new ties. I put it out of sight, out of mind while making my recovery.

I signed up in August, and started really digging into threads. I believe I posted just a couple replies, but there was little I could share, in terms of makeup, hairstyle, etc. that hadn't already been discussed. The Powder Room threads were chock-full of information - some of which I knew already, much of which was new. I felt overwhelmed. Despite my relative lack of shyness, I didn't quite feel I could just suddenly "drop in" and feel comfortable in the midst of these very knowledgable women with their well-established ties.

While tied to the computer working the other day, I suddenly decided to check it out again. After just those few months, my perception was that there were more "casual" threads than there had been when I peeked in this summer. It seemed it would be a smoother transition, getting to know people. So I jumped in, and participate where I'm comfortable. I don't usually ask for information, because I can research almost anything I need - questions like who makes the best high-waisted jeans, how to roller set your hair for the 40's and what are the best reference books, etc - have already been talked to death. If I'd been here some years back, I could have contributed my experiences to those threads, but I was simply unaware of their existence.

The fact is, I've been involved with the world of vintage for years. I started (like many here, I'm sure) collecting in high school. My tastes have evolved over time, and I've gained a fair amount of knowledge on my own, from research, experience and connections. Actually, I've rather felt recently that my knowledge-gathering stagnated, and so now is the perfect time to begin participating in the forum and jump start that process again.

The forum has actually (in a very roundabout way) inspired me to finally stop talking about traveling and do it. The fact that most cities of reasonable size have some community of FL'ers gives me an excuse to be elsewhere, and for at least one gathering, not feel completely lost and alone somewhere new! I'm best at building ties in person, anyway. First stop is AZ, to meet with the vibrant ladies there!

I don't expect to be treated like "one of the regulars" until I truly am one. But I'm not "just a drunk" as was earlier described, simply because I'm finally showing up daily and interacting with this fairly well-established group. I just came late to the table. Terrible manners, I know.

I still don't know how I managed NOT to hear about it for so very long, or why I let myself be intimidated when I finally had. I am truly sorry that I missed out on "the good ole days" here on the Lounge. But that doesn't mean that more good days aren't to come, or that new members won't be a part of creating them!

xo
Julie

 

[Quigley Brown]

Since I've been here there has been only one case...that I'm aware...of a member being kicked out for bad behavior. One out 7000 isn't too bad.

 

[Undertow]

I understand completely, but I’d also hope that if a new person...comes into a bar regularly, buys rounds for the house, gives members who have had too much to wear – er, I mean, to drink - a ride home, takes pains to give a sympathetic ear to Mabel the Barmaid and her floundering marriage, and generally tries to be a friendly, useful, and entertaining member of said bar, that the old-timers may say, “Gee, this kid has really taken the old firetrap to heart – Let’s warn him not to ask Joe the Owner’s Son about his stutter…"

I don’t think anybody’s asking for the keys to the door, or even a barstool. We just don’t want to have to stand there for thirty minutes before the bartender takes our order.

Your first point: If I was a regular at a bar, I knew the owner, I used to date his cousin, I've seen the place empty and watched it get full, I helped put decorations up during the holidays, I occasionally threw in a few extra bucks to keep the register open some nights...and some guy walks in trying to blow the doors off...

He's either a fast-talking con artist or a spy. No, I'm not implying you or anyone else are these things, but just consider, in your imagination, being in the shoes of those regulars. It's not that they don't like you, it's not that they don't want you around, but as I said in the previous post, some things take time.

Your second point: When there's 3000 members, 5000 members, or 7000 members - as is our case - don't worry about being served, just be patient. You'll get your drinks come hell or high water!

 

[FedoraGent]

Interesting enough...

Interesting enough, instead of posting his/her own comments to the thread a Lounger called me on the phone. They weren't irate, they just wanted to talk for a bit. This Lounger, who has asked to remain anonymous said something that just made me laugh a bit that I had to share.

"...the thread is beginning to sound like a healthy therapy session..."

I guess it is because we're all sharing our views, and that's what I've appreciated the most about the Lounge. This thread has been very healthy and civil and that just proves that the Lounge has a great sampling of intelligent folks. In talking about the Lounge and reading everyone else's posts it brought up a question for me. Why do I keep coming back to the Lounge? What keeps me? The only answer I keep coming up with is that the people are just grand and honestly for awhile I was thinking that there weren't enough of us out there. Now with 7k + people that seems to not be the case.

The Lounge personally has brought me many things that I've been rather thankful for. I count my lucky blessings that I've been so fortunate for not only the information and friendships gathered here...but Magneto and I met here. If it hadn't been for that one Lounge get together that I put together in San Francisco almost two years ago, I would not have met her or other Loungers. And think, I almost cancelled it the night before! Yes, the Lounge means different things for different people. My original post really wasn't intended to make it sound like I dislike the changes that the Lounge has gone through in the last two years. I just woke up one day and realized, doggone this place has changed quite a bit. I wonder what the others think, I thought. So in figuring that the folks that have seen most of the changes would be the Longtime Loungers, that's why I posted to get a different perspective. I like Jack's analogy about the apartment and the neighbor. It's somewhat befitting, but I know that although there have been some folks that have been a bad neighbor, for the most part it's been swell. I myself am not going anywhere.

And folks, you are right that some of us need to start posting more and sharing what's in our heads. I know that for me, what originally brought me to the Lounge was my love for all things Golden Era. Things like the music, the people, the history, and styles are what originallly brought us together. However, the scope has grown and so has the taste in decades and I'm not afraid of that, in fact I appreciate it. I've grown closer to some of the people here than I do some of my friends offline. There's something to be said for being able to share your thoughts, questions, meanderings and such with like minded people. For new Loungers, I like it when you guys ask questions (sometimes I have time to answer and sometimes I don't due to that pesky thing called work.). Some of the new Loungers here, like the young couple that I've met from Orange County are so excited, so peppy and have a HUGE willingness to learn. New and young Loungers show me that it's possible for people to the distinct difference in between just being gangsta and some of the hip hop styled fedoras and that schlock. As someone that was a teacher once, that part does bring a great deal of joy to me. You guys are a whole new generation of vintage interested people. That's just awesome in so many ways.

Admittedly when I posted the original post, I suppose that I was looking at the Lounge in a whole different light. The great thing about this place is that sometimes you find yourself thinking differently after reading the thoughts of others. My perspective has definitely changed. I know that I myself am going to take a great deal from this thread and put it to good use. I have a bunch of projects that I've been working on that I think I should share and get your thoughts on. Have a great holiday.

Jon aka FG.

 

[Ada Veen]

And god bless every one of us!

 

[PrettySquareGal]

The FL has aged and changed a great deal. I, however, am exactly the same as two years ago. I haven't aged one bit and I still like to talk about food and neat old things. [huh]

fftopic: In fact today is my two year FL anniversary!

Join Date: 12-18-2005

 

[FedoraGent]

Congrats!

PrettySquareGal,

Congrats!

FG.

The FL has aged and changed a great deal. I, however, am exactly the same as two years ago. I haven't aged one bit and I still like to talk about food and neat old things. [huh]

fftopic: In fact today is my two year FL anniversary!

Join Date: 12-18-2005

 

[reetpleat]

With 7000 customers, sometimes it's just easier and faster to point to the nearby table laden with what you are trying to order.

FWIW, I still feel like a new member, trying to make myself heard, and still get PM messages from more senior members calling me a Thread Killer because my innocuous post has halted a thread in its tracks.

Has the Lounge changed? Good Lord yes. Hitting "New Posts" used to get me a half page of new reading a day. Now it's two or three pages of posts to read every HOUR!


Baron Kurtz's suggestions are, as usual, on the mark.

Are you serious. Unles they are joking or you said something really innapropriate (which I am sure you don't) it seems pretty rude to accuse someone of being a thread killer. I think it is more of joke than a reality. Every thread has an off topic or lame post or two. People just ignore it and keep talking. Can someone actually kill a thread? Or do they just have the bad luck of beign the last post on a thread that has petered out.

 

[Miss Neecerie]

Are you serious. Unles they are joking or you said something really innapropriate (which I am sure you don't) it seems pretty rude to accuse someone of being a thread killer. I think it is more of joke than a reality. Every thread has an off topic or lame post or two. People just ignore it and keep talking. Can someone actually kill a thread? Or do they just have the bad luck of beign the last post on a thread that has petered out.

Having killed many a thread myself.....it does happen.

but yes...things move along right past it...