Is Hat Ettiquette Obsolete?

[hatguy1]

I take my hat off at church and dinner that is it. My hat stays on otherwise

Hey, bud. FYI, Your inbox is too full to send a message to you.


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[bowlerman]

Kids these days...

I don't wear my hats with any "due worship" to days gone by, but often with a nod to them. I don't like to wear my hats at dinner, or even sitting at the pub. Sitting, conversing with a lady-- my hat comes off unless I'm outside. Not for traditional decorum but because I feel like I'm hiding from them, which just simply feels wrong... to me...in any kind of formal or informal conversation. However, I also believe that a person has an obligation to live aesthetically as (s)he pleases, without the pretense of believing the world revolves around him(her).

It's a true privelege that we can do that in this country. Individuality and free thinking as opposed to buying into predetermined crowd philosophies and behaviors (the lazy way of thinking) are still valued, though I agree that there are a variety of situations in which people will feel pressured to give in or give up.

I'm also fairly certain that younger generations have traditionally rebelled in some way against their preceding generations, so if they didn't, I guess that would be rather non-traditional.

As for the aspirations of "them" (I'm unsure as to who "they" are, but would guess that today's American youth are implicated here), I can attest that "they" in fact are not all aspiring to be thugs and/or stoners. I have the honor of raising three beautiful offspring, whose aspirations couldn't be further from getting high or participating in group crimes, and I'm confident that I won't be eating my words later in life.

 

[Mystic]

Is hat etiquette obsolete?

According to my dictionary definition of obsolete. I would have to answer ....yes.

Just a thought on doffing one's hat. From what I have observed recently. People are so absorbed with staring at their iphones and other little gadgets they run into light poles, trash cans, doors, other people, and parked cars. They scarcely are even aware there are other people around them.

So, maybe they would "doff" their hat to women........if they were aware that these people existed.....

 

[fedoracentric]

Well, Florida_Marlin, you've essentially proven the point Abe Lincoln once made when he asked of his suspension of the Writ of Habeas Corpus. He criticized those who said that he should not suspend the writ because it was "the law," but he countered asking if they wanted "the government itself go to pieces, lest that one be violated?" In other words, don't follow etiquette so blindly that you destroy the whole reason for etiquette and that is a genteel code of human conduct.

 

[jlee562]

Personally I miss the etiquette and manners as well as the style. I believe a great deal of what's wrong with society today is the breakdown of etiquette and refinement. Seems like in the "good old days" even those who weren't very refined at least aspired to be. Nowadays they aspire to be nothing more than thugs or stoners.

It's all cyclical.

Complaining about the younger generation is what the older generation does.

To wit, see if you can tell if these quotes were written about millennials, or some other generation. (Spoiler alert: of course you can't, because people are always complaining about the young folks).

What's wrong with society is that this generation (of Americans at least) is the first generation who can not expect to be better off than their parents (as an average, of course). And however you want to allocate blame politically, the one thing you can't say is that it was the young people's lack of etiquette which caused the housing collapse, financial malfeasance in the private sector, or the ballooning student debt that previous generations never had to deal with.

Yeah, I'm sure we can fix everything if everybody my aged simply doffed their hats at women, wore high waisted pants, and double breasted suits.

And oh, not that I'm promoting the use of any illicit substance, but marijuana is demonstrably less harmful to the individual and society, and in fact, has been shown to have legitimate medical benefits in many avenues (widespread abuse of "medical" marijuana laws not withstanding). If I were a parent, I'd rather have a stoner kid than a drinking kid. Just sayin.

 

[CRH]

"Yah, I think we should keep the guv'mnt out of hat etiquette", he slurred.

 

[fedoracentric]

Good points, Jared.

All but this...

And oh, not that I'm promoting the use of any illicit substance, but marijuana is demonstrably less harmful to the individual and society, and in fact, has been shown to have legitimate medical benefits in many avenues (widespread abuse of "medical" marijuana laws not withstanding). If I were a parent, I'd rather have a stoner kid than a drinking kid.

Total nonsense.

Still, your point is taken. Though I don't think anyone here was saying that the world has gone to hell because kids don't know anything about etiquette.

In fact, I sort of said that the worst generation was MY generation: the woeful Baby Boomers.

If any generation destroyed this country it was them.

 

[MothPrey]

Not obsolete, and if you think there's no consequences you're fooling yourselves. Just because people don't say anything doesn't mean they don't notice.

When I was younger I lived for awhile right behind an enclosed shopping mall. It used to amuse me to gauge people's reactions to how I dressed- I'd cruise the stores, browse, come back wearing a sports jacket and do the same thing again, and get a lot more attention, more deference, and get called "Sir" a lot more. People weren't doing it consciously, it's just that many of our unconscious reactions go back in history, like it or not. Actually, if they WERE conscious of the reaction they might suppress it.

I see the habit of wearing either cowboy hats or caps just about anywhere, but I still find it jarring, and it's often hard not to assume it's deliberately rude. My father almost never wore a hat, he hated them, but he solemnly taught me the basic rules. His father, my paternal grandfather, was a real cowboy, and he followed the rules of hat etiquette very strictly indeed, probably more strictly than most city men.

Sometimes it's not entirely clear cut. I noticed that I had lapsed in wearing my hat in the elevators at work, and just last week determined to correct that. I don't take it off if I'm alone in the elevator (seems ridiculous), but certainly in the presence of ladies. Just this morning, honestly, I got on a fairly crowded elevator, last person on, turned around next to a dignified elderly lady and took my hat off, and she turned around and GRINNED at me. She didn't need to say anything.

So, keep your hat on if you want, but don't kid yourself- you won't see that grin. People notice, even if nobody ever says a word.

 

[Matt Crunk]

Yesterday I was in the sitting area of a crowded restaurant, sitting at a table with my hat on the table across from me. I had taken the last table, a small table for two, in the restaurant. A man came in, looking for a place to sit, looked like he had been working all day. I picked up my hat, put it on my head, and invited him over...
Manners, politeness, and caring for those around you don't have anything to do with frivolous, superficial things like wearing a hat in a dining area...or not.
Regards, Florida Marlin

Sounds like you were having LUNCH in a crowded DINER type environment, in which case it would have been much more acceptable even in the '40s or '50s to leave your hat on.

 

[suitedcboy]

"In fact, I sort of said that the worst generation was MY generation: the woeful Baby Boomers.

If any generation destroyed this country it was them. "

I'm right in the middle of the BB'ers era and I wear my hat in church! It is a cowboy church and everyone else does too including the pastor. Hats are off for prayers and if you are the person being baptized by dunking in the shimmering galvanized water trough up on the dais.

If cowboy churches with men wearing hats during sermons isn't the end of the world then what is? Yes, the folding chair rows are staggered so you are looking between the hats of the persons in the row in front of you. Hat wearers are clever and devoted people.

(The church burned. One has to wonder is all the hat-based blasphemin' was to blame....)

 

[fedoracentric]

Sounds like you were having LUNCH in a crowded DINER type environment, in which case it would have been much more acceptable even in the '40s or '50s to leave your hat on.

Here ya go.... customers in a diner with hats...

 

[CRH]

The past was always as ugly as the present. The good old days never were.

Just ask someone who was actually there.

 

[gtdean48]

Here ya go.... customers in a diner with hats...

View attachment 12043

Always heard - hats on eating at the counter but not at a table....

 

[hatguy1]

From what I have observed recently...People are so absorbed with staring at their iphones and other little gadgets they run into light poles, trash cans, doors, other people, and parked cars.

All the more reason to wear hats - wide brimmed hats are now a personal safety item. When the hat brim makes contact with something, the iPhone blares a warning "STOP!" lol

 

[VetPsychWars]

I wonder how much hat etiquette was followed in its supposed heyday. Right now I'm watching House of Strangers, a 1949 film set in 1932. There's a scene in it in an indoor stadium for a boxing match. At least half of the people watching are wearing their hats, men and women included. I just found it curious, because of this thread I not only noticed all the nice hats, but I began to wonder why they were wearing them. Anyway, I just thought I'd mention it.

In that locale, women would not have removed their hats unless it was a tall monstrosity. In fact, women in general kept their hats on whenever their coats were on. It was part of the ensemble.

Tom

 

[suitedcboy]

The safety factor of hat wearing is HUGE.
If I am in a low overhang area with a hat on I am ever watchful of anything touching the hat. Take that hat off and I'll bump my head into things multiple times. My head is much more valuable with a hat on it.


I think we're giving hat etiquette a good and decent thrashing.

I think we're down to hats off for:

1. prayer
2. sleeping if no accommodations for hat are available
3. going through a car wash if the top on the convertible will not go up
4. food fights
5. being in the presence of mean people who believe in the expired version of hat etiquette
6. changing the oil in your truck or car
7. showering if you have high mineral content water
8. high speed motorcycle riding
9. in an audience with the Pope (it would be awful to cause his holiness to be covetous of your hat)
10. if you are about to face a firing squad (those of us left behind bid lower on blood stained lids)

 

[Flat Foot Floey]

I think one should handle hat etiquette like rel****n. Do it for yourself, be proud of it but stop complaining about others. [huh]

 

[MothPrey]

8. high speed motorcycle riding

Funny you should mention that. I was trying to remember why my last period of hat-wearing came to an end, and I think that's it.

Sports bike, no real storage. Helmet laws. There's just no way...

 

[Joao Encarnado]

Always heard - hats on eating at the counter but not at a table....

On fast food restaurants I eat at a table but do not remove my hat. It's a place usually crowded and were I stay little time.

 

[hatophile]

Here ya go.... customers in a diner with hats...

View attachment 12043

Those guys look like cowboys/ranchers too, which makes it even more appropriate.