Is Hat Ettiquette Obsolete?

[Mr Oldschool]

Thanks, Frank! I love those old photos, and thanks for sharing your thoughts about them.

 

[Huertecilla]

Please do provide pics of your shopping trip with this fashionable woman if you can! Yes, a man should offer his arm to women to help them walk, even if they do not appear to be having a hard time walking. I would wager that only hard core feminists would take offense to such a gesture.

Mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa

I had forgotten my camera. Also the shop of Rosario Berrocal http://www.rosarioberrocal.com/2014/index.html was closed although it should have been open: this remains andalucia...

There will be another date with her. She LOVED the shop and was totally surprised too by a shop with vintage clothing. We will be back WITH camera.

Most surprisingly it turns out that the sister of her stepmother was a London milliner who usually took a hat for the kids whenever she/they visited. Those memories came back and she told wonderful stories. She was stunned that she had let life made her forget about it all and that she had no idea what had happened to the hats she had loved so much. No doubt that she will cable chase that.

I had a similar thing: I realised that I must somewhere have some photos of an exposition of over 300!!! vintage ladies hats I went to with a lady last year

http://www.museoautomovilmalaga.com/tag/sombreros-vintage/

That is btw about the ideal family museum: vintage cars for the boys and vintage clothes/hats for the girls.
As a bonus it is within sight of a marvellous mediterranean beach.

Back on topic I pulled all the stops and boy did she LOVE it.
She had appearantly been a bit early and very femininely had not been able to resist a pair of indeed seductive shoes. There you have a lovely woman with a handbag and a shop bag.
Yes I took my hat off, etc. AND offered to take the bag. Which she a bit surprised, cheerfully and gracefully accepted.
Was she capable of carrying this light bag herself? OF COURSE she was! It would have been plain rude though to have her walkabout with two bags while empty handed yourself.

She thoroughly enjoyed me holding doors, chairs, taking/holding coat, you name it. IT WAS FUN!
When she insisted on footing the bill I observed that her paying did not mean we would have sex as I am an emancipated man

We both REALLY enjoyed the 'role play'. Between brackets as it was genuine but out contemporary context. It is refreshing to show appreciation, feel appreciated without implications, just as a matter of good manners: A delightful experience of being courtuous and graceful.

 

[fashion frank]

Thats just what I'm talking about !

Back on topic I pulled all the stops and boy did she LOVE it.

Yes I took my hat off, etc. AND offered to take the bag. Which she a bit surprised, cheerfully and gracefully accepted.
Was she capable of carrying this light bag herself? OF COURSE she was! It would have been plain rude though to have her walkabout with two bags while empty handed yourself.

She thoroughly enjoyed me holding doors, chairs, taking/holding coat, you name it. IT WAS FUN!
When she insisted on footing the bill I observed that her paying did not mean we would have sex as I am an emancipated man

We both REALLY enjoyed the 'role play'. Between brackets as it was genuine but out contemporary context. It is refreshing to show appreciation, feel appreciated without implications, just as a matter of good manners: A delightful experience of being courtuous and graceful.

Thats what I'm talking about and way to go my good man .
People like doing it and having it done to them manners be it hat or othrewise
never "go out of style " !

Kodo's to you .

All the Best ,Fashion Frank

 

[Huertecilla]

Thank you for the compliment Sir.

Let me reproduce a quote I found:

'In your consideration of those who do not return your good manners, remember this: You can sink to their level and become like them, or you can maintain your self-respect by doing what you know is right.'

p.s. I wil try ad a signature quote covering the subject. It originates from the feudal days of chivalry.
On that subject I want to suggest reading the first few books of the 'Amadis of Gaul' series. These have been the base/core of chivalry for centuries, have been a foundation for the Romantics, was the direct motivation for Don Quichote and also for the orde with the signatue lema.

 

[Mystic]

Is Hat Ettiquette Obsolete?

WOW!!......Did this thread get off track.

 

[Huertecilla]

Is Hat Ettiquette Obsolete?

WOW!!......Did this thread get off track.

Not really.
Imo it kept dead on course. So it stopped at some quaint but ever so picturesque side line stations making the travelling more enjoyable.

What do YOU want?
'Yes it is, because I haven't got a clue nor does my world.'
'No, it is not because I say so'.
Or;
'Use the search function, topic closed.'

 

[CaramelSmoothie]

Thanks again Huertcilla!

I like the way you describe your outings with your friend! Keep the pictures and the stories coming. We appreciate it!

 

[CaramelSmoothie]

Not really.
Imo it kept dead on course. So it stopped at some quaint but ever so picturesque side line stations making the travelling more enjoyable.

What do YOU want?
'Yes it is, because I haven't got a clue nor does my world.'
'No, it is not because I say so'.
Or;
'Use the search function, topic closed.'

You have a way with words!

 

[Huertecilla]

You have a way with words!

Thanks for the compliment.

 

[fashion frank]

The $ 24,000.00 Question

So my good friend Shadomeg ,25 pages later do you think you got your answer to your original question ?

I know one thing ,speaking for myself I really enjoyed this Thread even if it was covered in eons past and took a left or a right now and then it was great to get everyone's different slant on it .

All the Best ,Fashion Frank

 

[Huertecilla]

Thanks again Huertcilla!

I like the way you describe your outings with your friend! Keep the pictures and the stories coming. We appreciate it!

You´re welcome

I will then.
The story hopefully continues; the continuance is not taken for granted. Hence too my efforts for applied courtesy & chivalry in the contemporary context.
And ofcourse there is my obligation to TFL for following up on the London millinary aunt. The world is a pañuelo and as this particular relation is filled with such coïncidances, the aunt may even have worked at Glyn´s! I take my responsibilities serious so will strive to see her again soon.

 

[Mr Oldschool]

So my good friend Shadomeg ,25 pages later do you think you got your answer to your original question ?

I know one thing ,speaking for myself I really enjoyed this Thread even if it was covered in eons past and took a left or a right now and then it was great to get everyone's different slant on it .

All the Best ,Fashion Frank

If any one answer can be derived from all of this, I think it would be that hat ettiquette has moved from what had been generally been expected behavior into the realm of a personal code of conduct, custom tailored to fit the desires of the individual as to how closely to follow the old requirement. I think we also found that one coloring influence on whether people still follow it seems to be the change in society's perception of courtesy, class, and chivalry. Also, apparently upward mobility is lower than it was a generation ago, and something about feminism...[huh]

 

[fedoracentric]

.... which, Shadomega, answers the first question. It IS dead as "etiquette" when it becomes the odd personal choice instead of a "generally accepted behavior."

 

[alanfgag]

I salute all your efforts.

 

[Huertecilla]

Also, apparently upward mobility is lower than it was a generation ago, and something about feminism...[huh]

The feminism thing is imo a debunked alibi but the other is seems very, véry true. Investing in an aspirational watch is far easier than investing in one´s chivalrous, courteous manners.

Whether obsolete or not is a bit academic.
Hattiquete has by and large gone down the drains with the hats and social aspirations.
I acknowledge that it suits me wáy more because of the threatened status than when it would be the norm.
By all means put it on the ´extinct´ list because of definition; chivalrous courtesy including hattiquette scores among 40 y.o. single women like being a western millionair with russian 25 y.old fake blondes; intelligent, capable, self confident women still totally appreciate the set ´because she is worth it´.

 

[Mr Oldschool]

I acknowledge that it suits me wáy more because of the threatened status than when it would be the norm.[/i].

To some extent, me too. It's a little funny, what used to be required, and was propably begrudged by some at the time is now the rebellious choice of the few who still participate.

 

[Huertecilla]

To some extent, me too. It's a little funny, what used to be required, and was propably begrudged by some at the time is now the rebellious choice of the few who still participate.

..and there is no doubt whatsoever that women recognise and appreciate courteous manners including hattiquette.
In romantic films and cheap love pulp selling HÚGE time it all is very much alive; the idealised heroe figure who gets the main character with whom the reader identifies herself, is always chivalrous, courteous, well mannered underlining that she is worth it.
Yes, that is probably because in real life the normal, attainable bloke with manners it is by and large threatened with extinction.
So Fedoracentric, I totally agree with that it is all but extinct but I remain that because of romantic women it is FAR from obsolete.

 

[CaramelSmoothie]

Whether obsolete or not is a bit academic.
Hattiquete has by and large gone down the drains with the hats and social aspirations.
I acknowledge that it suits me wáy more because of the threatened status than when it would be the norm.
By all means put it on the ´extinct´ list because of definition; chivalrous courtesy including hattiquette scores among 40 y.o. single women like being a western millionair with russian 25 y.old fake blondes; intelligent, capable, self confident women still totally appreciate the set ´because she is worth it´.

/Thread

Well, there you go Shadomega, here is your answer. Nothing more needs to be said as this is hattiquette summed up. Keep on keeping on and women with common sense will appreciate it while those who don't can just kick rocks, lol, for in the end you've lost nothing by carrying on the tradition.

 

[fashion frank]

Your Killing Me !

I salute all your efforts.

OMG Alan that has got to be the best post yet in this thread , I am rolling around on the floor ,peeing my pants ,that is just way to funny ,
I love your sense of humor,your a class act all the way :cheer2:

All the Best ,Fashion Frank

 

[-30-]

Just because of what the philistines say, this does not mean Hattiquette/Manners is/are dead; alive and well, blacksmithy, Cordwainers and Steam Fitting continues,

although at a reduced pace but a higher "pay scale"; "rock kicking", always being on the lower.


Regards,
J T