Families of the Lounge

[Big Man]

Thanks HD.
Today, for the first time, she cried and asked why her 'real' mother didn't love her enough to keep her. That is a difficult ****ing conversation to have with a child, in case you were wondering. Tore my guts out.

Good to know she's in a place now where she won't have to worry about that again. Hold them tight.

 

[jamespowers]

Thanks HD.
Today, for the first time, she cried and asked why her 'real' mother didn't love her enough to keep her. That is a difficult ****ing conversation to have with a child, in case you were wondering. Tore my guts out.

:doh: Well, at least you and your wife are there to take up the slack and give her a good home. Probably much better this way. I sure don't envy you in that conversation.

 

[dh66]

HD, Big Man, and JP - thanks for the kind sentiments.

 

[sheeplady]

One of my high school friends was adopted. When she asked her mother why her birth mom gave her up rather than keeping her (in similar terms to your daughter); her mother told my friend that her birth mom loved her so much that she knew that she couldn't provide for her. Her birth mother loved her enough to put her daughter's well being ahead of her own feelings.

My friend never quite understood that until she grew up and had her own kids. She said that once she did she understood that true love is doing what is best for your kids, not what's best for your own emotions. What little she knows of her birth mother (a closed adoption- she doesn't even know her birth mother's first name- she was young and in a bad relationship) indicates that she was ill prepared to raise my friend.

My friend hasn't stopped the quest to find her birth mother and father; as well as any siblings she has. But she hasn't had any luck with so little to go on. But it is more curiosity, and didn't really begin until after her adoptive father passed away, and isn't in the sense that she has anger or sadness. She just wants to know some basic medical history, her ancestry, and some other basic information.

So there is hope out there for your daughter someday healing from that.

Do you know anything about her mother?

 

[dh66]

Thank you for your thoughtful reply, Sheeplady. That is, in essence, how we explained things. I don't know how much, if any, of it sank in, but after three bowls of her favorite soup and "Mr. Peabody & Sherman" for the fourth night in a row all was well in her world. For the time being, anyway.

 

[1mach1]

Thanks HD.
Today, for the first time, she cried and asked why her 'real' mother didn't love her enough to keep her. That is a difficult ****ing conversation to have with a child, in case you were wondering. Tore my guts out.

Talk about testing your parenting skills. I am sure that was a tough one, man. She is a beautiful young gal, Dale. She's lucky to have you guys!

 

[dh66]

Thanks, Harv.

 

[Panadora]

How many children do you have? Seamus and the younger sister are those 'your own' children?

Nice sofa btw

 

[Babydoll]

Thanks HD.
Today, for the first time, she cried and asked why her 'real' mother didn't love her enough to keep her. That is a difficult ****ing conversation to have with a child, in case you were wondering. Tore my guts out.

The heartache a parent feels for their child when they are in pain, be it physical or emotional. I've felt it before with Lily. Wished I could take it away and make it all better. I'm sure you gave her lots of daddy love (a very special thing!). Listening and validating her feelings is a huge part of her processing this. And also, what Sheeplady said.

 

[dh66]

Thanks Babydoll.

 

[dh66]

How many children do you have? Seamus and the younger sister are those 'your own' children?

Nice sofa btw

Half a dozen.
And yes, the rest are all 'home grown'.


And thanks.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

Some photos from babysitting my nephew the other day. We had a lot of fun!

He got to dial his first rotary phone:

 

[HoosierDaddy]

He's a cutie like his Mommy,Tom..

 

[AtomicEraTom]

He's a great kid, and my sister just found out a couple days ago that she is expecting another.

He's a cutie like his Mommy,Tom..

 

[HoosierDaddy]

He's a great kid, and my sister just found out a couple days ago that she is expecting another.

Oops..she kinda went out of turn..didn't she..?? Big Brothers just get no respect...
HD

 

[AtomicEraTom]

I have no intention of having any of my own, any time soon. I'm nowhere near ready for that.

Oops..she kinda went out of turn..didn't she..?? Big Brothers just get no respect...
HD

 

[HoosierDaddy]

 

[dh66]

Cute kid, Tom.

If you wait until you're ready, you'll never end up having one, you know.

 

[Mid-fogey]

...ahhh. Babysitting a very young niece or nephew, the very best form of birth control.

 

[Babydoll]

When I was around 8 years old, my Grannie taught me how to crochet. It was always a hobby until I had Lily and started making hats for her. The hats became quite popular with my local mommy friends, and I've been selling them online for the past 2+ years. I received an order last week that made me tear up. A lady from Norway ordered one of my hats. Gran, who was a first generation Norwegian-American would have been absolutely tickled that this skill she taught me 30+ years ago kinda made it full circle in going back to where my family started. I could feel her smiling down on me!

My favorite photo of Gran, my Mom, and myself on a very special day.