Dating for Fedora Loungers?

[vintage68]

One of my favorite authors, Robert B. Parker, had a living arrangement with his wife where he had the lower half of the house, and she had the top half. It seemed to work out well for both of them and they were happily married until he passed away earlier this year.

 

[Amy Jeanne]

After reading all of this: Glad I'm HAPPILY married!! lol I've got tats and I'm pretty "nice". So glad my hubby likes them!!!

 

[shopgirl61]

Blast! Can't we just start a Fedora Colony or something? We'd most certainly be in the very best of company if we did.

I think that would be a splendid idea :eusa_clap

 

[Derek WC]

Jazzy Dame
Blast! Can't we just start a Fedora Colony or something? We'd most certainly be in the very best of company if we did.

How about a Fedoratlantis? :coffee:

AtomicEraTom
Being an old-fashioned guy, I've always hoped to get married, settle down, have a family, a station wagon, a color TV set, a yard, the whole American Dream thing haha. The only ones I've got is the color TV's and the Wagon. I find it tough to date because of being a vintage type guy in style and beliefs.

Seems most women aren't interested in anyone who is even the slightest bit eccentric, or that doesn't fit into one of the 'labels' of what women are looking for these days. If you aren't a 'country boy' or a 'prep' or a 'emo' or something along those lines, they don't want ya.

I also get tired of hearing "you're too nice" what kinda thing is that to say? Shouldn't you be nice and sweet to a woman whom you are trying to woo?

My thoughts exactly, word for word, except the part about the Color Television, Black and White for me.

 

[Paisley]

This thread had some good posts on the whole "nice guy" thing:

http://thefedoralounge.com/showthread.php?t=18891&page=4

 

[ScionPI2005]

I use OkCupid.com to get my dates. It works for me. I don't go out looking specifically for girls in old fashioned outfits, but I have seen a fair share of girls wearing fedoras there. As always, your mileage may vary. I'm dating someone I met on it now. See how that goes. Just gotta be insane. By insane, I mean, you'll have to do the same thing over and over again, expecting different results every time, and somehow remain optimistic while doing so.

Actually, that's very true. I've used online dating sites off and on, and your observation are right on track. When I see my optimism slipping, I know its time to back off the dating for a while and let the dust settle.

 

[bwildered]

I am not really into the vintage scene, just into hats....that's how I ended up here.
As far as meeting women is concerned, like the old saying goes, "there's one on every corner".

 

[vintage68]

"Livejournal, of all places, 6 years ago. We were both heavily into indie/emo and dressed the part too."


At the risk of dating myself, what or who is an "emo?"

 

[Marla]

Vintage Dating: A Guide

I think if you're serious about wanting to live a vintage lifestyle then it's better to stay single and wait for a vintage-loving partner rather than settle for someone who isn't into vintage. Even if you think it won't bother you that your partner doesn't dress or like vintage, it will eventually create a rift between you two. If collecting vintage is a big part of your life then that's a big part of your life that you can't share with your partner. And judging by the length of this thread, their are many vintage singles, so keep looking!

However, you can try to convert your non-vintage partner to vintage, but it is usually a long and difficult process with a low chance of success. You can expose them to vintage, but if your partner lacks enthusiasm then they will only go along with the charade to please you. There are essentially 4 types of people, in descending order of difficulty to convert:

1. The Vintage Lover--the ideal. Someone who is just like you as far as vintage is concerned.

2. The Collector--this type collects and is only interested in one area of the Golden Era, e.g. dancing, furniture, hats, music, cars, radios, etc. Introduce this type to other collectible areas of vintage. All this type needs is for you to spark their interest in collecting a wide spectrum of vintage items; once their collections expand they will quickly progress to the top tier.

3. The Appreciator--this type 'admires' vintage design and styles, but hasn't taken the initiative to 'take the plunge.' Give them a push in the right direction and sooth their fear of non-conformity.

4. The Average Joe-- this type has no interest in vintage whatsoever. Extremely difficult to convert and not an advisable undertaking.


NOTE: Converting an outsider to vintage is possible (after all, we are all converts!) but challenging, and should only be undertaken with full awareness that it may ruin your relationship if you push your partner along the echelons too quickly.

 

[LocktownDog]

I honestly couldn't care less if some woman I may or may not meet dresses vintage. It will most certainly bother me however, if she looks upon my so-called "style" with disdain and/or doesn't enjoy the same films and music as myself.

 

[Paisley]

While a dancer would be great for someone like me, a collector in the literal sense would not. I can't stand clutter and I'm not willing to pay for storage.

 

[reetpleat]

How about a Fedoratlantis? :coffee:



My thoughts exactly, word for word, except the part about the Color Television, Black and White for me.

Guys need to understand that women will go along with just about any type of guy if he is strong enough in being himself and owning his style, look, personality.

Sure some girls are superficial, and some are too hardcore into their own clique or style. but the majority of women are quite open to a man with the strength of his own self. i have dated so many different types of women and it has never been an issue.

 

[shopgirl61]

I honestly couldn't care less if some woman I may or may not meet dresses vintage. It will most certainly bother me however, if she looks upon my so-called "style" with disdain and/or doesn't enjoy the same films and music as myself.

My sentiments exactly!

 

[Diamondback]

Well, maybe having to share tastes is a little strong, but you do have to be able to tolerate each other's interests and to a degree support them in them.

Not related to "dating" outside of the "common values/tolerance" issue, but to illustrate that principle there tend to be huge conflicts between myself (I pride myself on being a professional and presenting myself accordingly including dress) and most of my relatives (who present themselves and dress like WalMartian refugees from Lower Slobovia and believe everyone else should too). I don't care that they don't hold themselves to my standard, the beef is that they refuse to accept that I will not hold to their lack of standards.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

I don't think it's a necessity to be involved in the vintage lifestyle for a woman to be ideal for me. The last woman I was involved with was a 'country girl' I guess you'd say. But we really clicked. Country folks have much of the same old-fashioned values, we enjoyed a lot of the same old country music (Johnny Cash, Conway Twitty, George Jones, etc.) We really clicked. I think if you hold out for someone vintage, especially if you live somewhere where there isn't much of that, as I do. You are going to be alone for a long time.

 

[vintage68]

While a dancer would be great for someone like me, a collector in the literal sense would not. I can't stand clutter and I'm not willing to pay for storage.

A woman after my own heart, though I prefer to say I live in Thoreauvian simplicity when it comes to having a clutter-free home

 

[bunnyb.gal]

I am not really into the vintage scene, just into hats....that's how I ended up here.
As far as meeting women is concerned, like the old saying goes, "there's one on every corner".

I think the ones hanging out on corners may not be the ones you'll be wanting to bring home to meet your ma .

The reason I began reading this thread, by the way, is that I'm fascinated to hear about Loungers who have/haven't vintage mates and how they feel about the situation in which they find themselves. I freely admit to being jealous of those of you who have found their "vintage soulmate"!

 

[tuppence]

I can out-sads you all.
My partners' passion is Hip Hop and his t.v. viewing focuses on W.W.E

 

[Edward]

I can out-sads you all.
My partners' passion is Hip Hop and his t.v. viewing focuses on W.W.E

There's no fair jury would convict you...

 

[Diamondback]

There's no fair jury would convict you...

Assuming that Justice weren't blind, deaf, stupid and whoring herself out to the highest bidder, that is.