Want to buy or sell something? Check the classifieds
  • The Fedora Lounge is supported in part by commission earning affiliate links sitewide. Please support us by using them. You may learn more here.

Anyone else ever feel like this?

Miss Scarlet

One of the Regulars
Messages
161
Location
Tring, Hertfordshire
This might sound strange, but what I find works for me is cleaning. If I've had a couple of down weeks and I've let my appearance slip a bit, I start to notice dirt and mess around the house and that really affects me. So I clean and tidy and because the house looks so nice, the next day I want to match the house and make myself look nice too.

I'm having a couple of down weeks and have been so lazy with my appearance, since I work from home and have no purpose to really try a lot of the time. Most of the time I do make an effort even at home, but it is hard keeping it up when you have nowhere to go. I haven't got round to cleaning yet, but I can feel it coming so I know change is just around the corner and I'll start making myself look nice again.
 

Amy Jeanne

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,858
Location
Colorado
Smuterella said:
Ten minutes a day just on eyebrows?

I happened to notice the time this morning when I got in the shower and the time when I was done putting on makeup and doing my hair and getting dressed: 13 minutes!!
 

MissHannah

One Too Many
Messages
1,248
Location
London
Smuterella said:
Ten minutes a day just on eyebrows?

I think with plucking and drawing-on I probably spend about 10 minutes a day on mine too. It does sound like a lot when you write it down! I also spend about 10 minutes, moisturising, sun-blocking and priming my skin before I even start my make-up. It all mounts up.
 

Drappa

One Too Many
Messages
1,141
Location
Hampshire, UK
Fleur De Guerre said:
:eek:fftopic: three words - old lady salon! Did my own side parting though, and really it was just about changing the structure of my hair - the setting is still down to me, but it holds much better!
Thank you!

About the actual topic, I gave up my job last year due to relocation and haven't found a new one yet, so have been a bit down. But I always make sure to wear make-up and try to wear a dress every day, even though I mainly just walk the dog. I am doing a bit of temporary work this week and have dressed down for the job, but will get back to my look once I finished. Even though my make-up and hair takes me a long time comparatively I do it to feel like I have some control over things I think. I have never, ever been outside in jogging pants unless I was actually jogging. I also do it partly because my husband nudges me. He gets completely confused when I wear modern clothing and usually knows something is up, so he encourages me to make more of an effort, even though he always compliments me even if I am in pajamas. In return me dressing nice encourages him, and he just bought himself some nice clothes so that he "can be seen with me" (his words, not mine, I don't mind if he isn't dressed up).
Maybe it also helps that I have compartmentalised my wardrobe/drawers, so that if I get dressed for the day I wouldn't even look into the drawers with "lazy" outfits.
 

dimples

New in Town
Messages
21
Location
UK
Its a scary amount of time to spend on one, not particularly large, part of your body isn't it?

But I usually break it down to a couple of minutes here and there throughout the day (I work from home). Its a routine - after I take a comfort break :) I spend a couple of minutes plucking and tidying. I find the different light throughout the day helps to see the pesky blonde hairs that I missed earlier.

If I am going out I can do makeup, hair and into clothes in 15 mins.
 

Retro Chick

New in Town
Messages
38
Location
Norwich, UK
I get down a lot, and can't be bothered to make the effort, but like some other ladies have said, forcing myself to make the effort at least to apply a bit of make up makes me feel so much better.

I don't have any sweat pants, so I wouldn't wear those and I don't find jeans very comfortable, so I mostly wear skirts and dresses, even if I feel rubbish, which seems to equal extreme glamour to most people anyway!

I can do basic make up in about 10 minutes, and I can't imagine going out without any! I have a few up dos that don't require a set that I can just do in the morning. I like my hair off my face anyway. So to me a dress, make up and an up do = I can't be bothered to do anything fancy lol

Am I the only person that finds the Helena Rubenstein quote inspirational? I think that it suggests that it doesn't matter in the slightest what you were given naturally, if you want to look a certain way and you don't you have only yourself to blame and you should just make the effort to get that look! Curly hair can be straight, straight hair curly, waists slimmed and arms toned by exercise, it's down to you.
 

Lady Day

I'll Lock Up
Bartender
Messages
9,087
Location
Crummy town, USA
"There are no ugly women, only lazy ones."
Helene Rubinstein.

This is a true statement, no matter who says it. It boils down to effort. Lack of it equals ugly. Trying equals not ugly. It cuts a little honest and that might make people offended by it.

This is across the board in anything. You have to try to get results. A lack of that equals a malaise.

As someone who was diagnosed with severe depression just a few years ago (yay medication and therapy!) I can honestly say that the only way to get yourself out of a feeling, a rut, or whatever is trying and effort.

Feeling blah, budget 5 extra minutes to get up a bit earlier to put on your face. Plan your outfit the evening prior. You deserve to take sometime to make yourself feel better. Its not always about spa weekends or getting away from the kids.

Before I got help I spent 5 consecutive days and nights sleeping. No work, no phone calls, no nothing. And I would have been content to keep doing that, but I knew it wasn't right. I had to make an effort. Im sure youre blah isnt as severe, but I remember my doctor telling me that me going to get help was a big deal and that most people never do.

Where was I going with this...oh yeah. Just make yourself put forth some effort.

LD
 

Mae Croft

Familiar Face
Messages
82
Location
Gentry County, Missouri USA
I've recently gone through a bout of this, it came with the realization that my hair wouldn't hold a curl even with setting lotion in the heat and humidity of NW Missouri and no air conditioning at all for two months, plus work, plus working for my mother, plus working on her new husband's political campaign, plus renovating a 1901 home (turning it into a vintage bed and breakfast!), plus feeding and 'training' both a rowdy German Shepherd pup and a rowdy 19 year old boy, plus, plus, plus! Things really pile up on you sometimes, and you can't beat yourself up about it, right?

But now that the weather is a little cooler (thank the gods!), the campaign is over (thank even more gods!) and things are slowing down just a bit here I finally had time to lop two feet off of my hair and cut it in a middy long with help from my sis. I find that made all the difference to me, it takes me 15 minutes tops to set it in pin curls or 20 for finger waves, wrap a bandanna around it and go to sleep.

I tend to sleep fairly soundly on pin curls or foam rollers, so no issues there, but I find that since my curl sets tend to last 3 or 4 days (I set again every night after a good brushing), it takes me no time at all to get ready in the morning because getting dressed is a 10 minute job for me.

I agree with the idea that vintage isn't necessarily any harder than any other look, it's just different. I find that since almost every item of clothing I own is repro or as close to 'vintage' looking as I could find in a modern store, it's easier to dress my era than it would be if I had a lot of modern clothes and only a few vintage-styled pieces. :)
 

Amy Jeanne

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,858
Location
Colorado
Lady Day said:
This is a true statement, no matter who says it. It boils down to effort. Lack of it equals ugly. Trying equals not ugly. It cuts a little honest and that might make people offended by it.

:eusa_clap
100% agree.
 

lareine

A-List Customer
Messages
309
Location
New Zealand
Retro Chick said:
I think that it suggests that it doesn't matter in the slightest what you were given naturally, if you want to look a certain way and you don't you have only yourself to blame and you should just make the effort to get that look! Curly hair can be straight, straight hair curly, waists slimmed and arms toned by exercise, it's down to you.
If that's what it's suggesting then it's complete bollocks. Let's say I, at a voluptuous 5' 8", want to be a petite boy-figured waif. Can any amount of effort or exercise ever give me that look? No. Can I have a 34/24/34 figure? No, my body type will not allow that. Can I have a 36/56/36 figure just because I want it? Again no, my body type will not allow that.

I find it offensive that anybody would suggest that my inability to have a particular look is down to laziness on my part. Sure, some things can be changed, but some things definitely can't. What you are given naturally obviously matters immensely.
 

Puzzicato

One Too Many
Messages
1,843
Location
Ex-pat Ozzie in Greater London, UK
Lady Day said:
Helene Rubinstein.

This is a true statement, no matter who says it. It boils down to effort. Lack of it equals ugly. Trying equals not ugly. It cuts a little honest and that might make people offended by it.

This is across the board in anything. You have to try to get results. A lack of that equals a malaise.

As someone who was diagnosed with severe depression just a few years ago (yay medication and therapy!) I can honestly say that the only way to get yourself out of a feeling, a rut, or whatever is trying and effort.

Feeling blah, budget 5 extra minutes to get up a bit earlier to put on your face. Plan your outfit the evening prior. You deserve to take sometime to make yourself feel better. Its not always about spa weekends or getting away from the kids.

Before I got help I spent 5 consecutive days and nights sleeping. No work, no phone calls, no nothing. And I would have been content to keep doing that, but I knew it wasn't right. I had to make an effort. Im sure youre blah isnt as severe, but I remember my doctor telling me that me going to get help was a big deal and that most people never do.

Where was I going with this...oh yeah. Just make yourself put forth some effort.

LD

I agree that if you are in a rut it takes effort to get out of it but lack of effort equals ugly is nonsense. There are many very beautiful people who don't make the slightest bit of effort with their appearance. But then, Helena Rubinstein made a lot of money out of making women feel inferior so I am not much interested in following her maxims.
 

Smuterella

One Too Many
Messages
1,776
Location
London
^ I'm with you on that. I met the most stunning woman yesterday and she wasn't wearing a scrap of make up. If she hadn't been so lovely I'd have wanted to sick in my mouth a little. ;)

This discussion reminds of that vile joke

"Why do women wear make up and perfume?"

"Because they are ugly and they smell"


Shouldn't we all know better, and treat ourselves better, than to assume a lack of effort means we are ugly?

I prefer myself when I've made the effort, but again that is surely more born from societal expectation and media bombardment than the fact that a lack of make up makes me hideous.
 

YesterdayGirl

One of the Regulars
Messages
111
Location
London
Smuterella said:
^ Shouldn't we all know better, and treat ourselves better, than to assume a lack of effort means we are ugly?.

We should know better, but personally because I have worn make up every day from about the age of 15, I do feel slightly hideous without it. I just don't feel myself. And I suppose that is quite sad really. But on the other side of things, I like spending time on myself and actually enjoy the process of getting ready. It's all become part of a routine, and it doesn't feel like a burden on my time. I enjoy knowing i've made the effort ;)
 

Honey Bee

One of the Regulars
Messages
204
Location
Northern California
Yesterday was one of those days for me....finally I went into the bathroom, and really looked...icky! So on goes the curling iron, on goes music to cheer me (not the dreamy music I had been listening to), a face wash, nicer looking yard clohes (yes, yard clothes can look stylish!) and back to work I went..and I did feel better :)
Now to address the WHY I got down? Focusing on what wasn't right in front of me, but rather on a storyline my mind was playing out...when I loose focus of whats right in front of me (and there is plenty good right there!), I get down.
Silly woman, FOCUS!!!

And to "YesterdayGirl"...you truly are lovely, can't imagine you 'hideous' at all!
 

LizzieMaine

Bartender
Messages
33,835
Location
Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
I think there's something to be said for both sides in the Helena Rubenstien argument, if you disregard her use of the word "ugly," which is frankly a bit too strong for my taste. What she was trying to get at is that anyone can be well-put-together if they try, that looking good isn't something that's only reserved for people who are "born gorgeous." The word "Lazy", however, gets my hackles up.

Me, I'm middle-aged, have chronic dark circles under my eyes, my waist is too big, my chest is too small, and I have unfortunate teeth. When I first get out of bed in the morning I look like hell on toast, and there are times when I couldn't care less if I do. I spent this morning scrubbing the floor, washing dishes, and going to the dump. I'm wearing a head rag, no makeup, a ripped housedress with a patch on the backside, and worn-out shoes, and I'm not about to get all primped up on the off chance that my dream man might be operating the garbage compactor, or might come to my back door selling magazine subscriptions.

It's not that I'm not trying, it's that I'm at the point in my life where I realize there *are* times where I don't *have to* bother. Doesn't make me lazy at all -- it just means I've arrived at the point in life where I'm comfortable picking my battles. When the circumstances mean it's important that I do try, I go at it as thoroughly as anyone, and given what I've got to work with I think I clean up pretty well.
 

Drappa

One Too Many
Messages
1,141
Location
Hampshire, UK
Puzzicato said:
I agree that if you are in a rut it takes effort to get out of it but lack of effort equals ugly is nonsense. There are many very beautiful people who don't make the slightest bit of effort with their appearance. But then, Helena Rubinstein made a lot of money out of making women feel inferior so I am not much interested in following her maxims.

Well said. Of course you'd say that if you were head of a huge cosmetics firm.
I also reject the notion that everyone has to make an effort with their appearance in some way. Some people just don't care about this and prefer to spend their time otherwise, which doesn't make them ugly. Then there are many, many people who put much effort into their appearance and the results are still disastrous.
 

Miss Peach

One of the Regulars
Messages
126
Location
Hometown
I think there's something to be said for both sides in the Helena Rubenstien argument, if you disregard her use of the word "ugly," which is frankly a bit too strong for my taste. What she was trying to get at is that anyone can be well-put-together if they try, that looking good isn't something that's only reserved for people who are "born gorgeous." The word "Lazy", however, gets my hackles up.

Me, I'm middle-aged, have chronic dark circles under my eyes, my waist is too big, my chest is too small, and I have unfortunate teeth. When I first get out of bed in the morning I look like hell on toast, and there are times when I couldn't care less if I do. I spent this morning scrubbing the floor, washing dishes, and going to the dump. I'm wearing a head rag, no makeup, a ripped housedress with a patch on the backside, and worn-out shoes, and I'm not about to get all primped up on the off chance that my dream man might be operating the garbage compactor, or might come to my back door selling magazine subscriptions.

It's not that I'm not trying, it's that I'm at the point in my life where I realize there *are* times where I don't *have to* bother. Doesn't make me lazy at all -- it just means I've arrived at the point in life where I'm comfortable picking my battles. When the circumstances mean it's important that I do try, I go at it as thoroughly as anyone, and given what I've got to work with I think I clean up pretty well.

And that is what we call a good dose of common sense, best applied generously and repeated.
 

HepKitty

One Too Many
Messages
1,156
Location
Idaho
Puzzicato said:
I agree that if you are in a rut it takes effort to get out of it but lack of effort equals ugly is nonsense. There are many very beautiful people who don't make the slightest bit of effort with their appearance. But then, Helena Rubinstein made a lot of money out of making women feel inferior so I am not much interested in following her maxims.

kind of sick isn't it?

ultimately, if you don't take care of yourself, who will?
 

Forum statistics

Threads
109,667
Messages
3,086,199
Members
54,480
Latest member
PISoftware
Top