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any old-school housewives??

Real Swell Gal

One of the Regulars
Messages
277
Location
Ohio
Okay, remember how I said you should always have a back up plan???

Yeah well my husband got laid off from work last night!
:(
 

The Shirt

Practically Family
Messages
852
Location
Minneapolis
Ugh - I'm sorry to hear that. It seems to really be going around. I know that when my BF was laid off last fall, it was tough for me to shift gears and pick up the checks, help him out when I could, and keep his spirits up. Hang in there, re-group and try to focus on each other.

I'm not a SAHM but I hope that someday I am in a position to do it for a little while, a couple of years if possible. But it really takes some planning and some sacrifices. I know that my back-up plan is that I could always work in my chosen career. We talk a lot about how we plan to live together and what our financial expectations are. I just don't see a way that we could survive on one income in today's economy. Kudos to everyone who can make that work.

My mother stayed at home until we were well into elementary school - and I only have the best memories of it. Oddly enough - she went back to school and we both graduated with our masters within days of each other. I'm so proud of her. It was kind of fun to go thru the "girl on her own, making her way in the workforce" with her at the same time. Though now at 65 she hardly seems ready to retire because she loves working.

I think what I learned from it was that life doesn't always give you what you planned and you have to redefine yourself, your dreams, and what will make you happiest along the way in your life.
 

Real Swell Gal

One of the Regulars
Messages
277
Location
Ohio
Well to be honest right now I have to say I am proud of myself for keeping up with my certifications over the years.
I now work for the US Airforce as a dental assistant and I love my job.
It also pays about the same as my husbands job did. The difference was my insurance is much more expensive than his so I only had single coverage that I was pretty much forced to take. Meaning my kids have no insurance right now. I would have no paycheck left. Another difference is that he worked more hours than I do. I work 32 a week and he worked at least 40.
Matter of fact for the last few months he had been working every Saturday overtime. He goes from overtime to laid off.
WTF??

So my biggest worries are insurance for my kids and how long he'll be off.
 

Foofoogal

Banned
Messages
4,884
Location
Vintage Land
:eek:fftopic:
Wow Cherry Red. you do marvelous work on your dolls. I peeked at your profile. I cannot believe this but I spent 2 weeks in Ft. Smith in the Fall and the one thing I demanded to see was the Doll Collection at the museum. It was fabulous. I started in the antiques business by collecting dolls.
I didn't find a link to your etsy store though. How do I find it? Sandy
 

Joie DeVive

One Too Many
Messages
1,308
Location
Colorado
Real Swell Gal said:
Okay, remember how I said you should always have a back up plan???

Yeah well my husband got laid off from work last night!
:(

I'm sorry to hear that. Layoffs are always stressful situations. I'll keep my fingers crossed that things will work out soon.
 

Smuterella

One Too Many
Messages
1,776
Location
London
Real Swell Gal said:
Okay, remember how I said you should always have a back up plan???

Yeah well my husband got laid off from work last night!
:(

*virtual hug*

thats terrible, but I'm sure things will work out
 
Foofoogal said:
:eek:fftopic:
Wow Cherry Red. you do marvelous work on your dolls. I peeked at your profile. I cannot believe this but I spent 2 weeks in Ft. Smith in the Fall and the one thing I demanded to see was the Doll Collection at the museum. It was fabulous. I started in the antiques business by collecting dolls.
I didn't find a link to your etsy store though. How do I find it? Sandy

:eek:fftopic: Oh NO!! I wish I new you were here we could have gone to the museum together. I haven't been down there in a while. I had done some volunteering for them and help do a little re-organizing of the collection. It needs a lot of work but they haven't the funds to hire me to do it.

Be sure and PM me if you are ever going to be in town again!!

I will add my etsy store to my profile on here. Thanks for the reminder.;)
 

Honey Doll

Practically Family
Messages
523
Location
Rochester, NY
Dottie

Miss Dottie said:
;) This post is something that is on the tip of my thoughts recently.

I'd like to be a stay at home mother/housewife, but I make more money than my husband, so it really wouldn't behoove me or our hopefully burgeoning family to give up being the bigger breadwinner. It's just a bummer.

Right now my husband and I are trying to get pregnant and I wake up with these terrifying dreams that I've turned into that horrific mother that all of the other mothers gossip about because she buys cookies instead of making them by hand because she's working and has to put her child in daycare which will surely turn her sweet babies into obese drug-addled hoodlums. Eek!

Clearly it's a very sensitive topic for me. Please forgive me nerve-wracking confessions--clearly there's a lot to think about when having kiddies. I'll blame it on PMS (or potentially early pregnancy--crossing fingers...)

But I must remember that love and a good moral compass and willingness to put family before everything will hopefully steer me right as a parent.

All I know is that it's a very personal decision linked to more than just one's desire.


Oh my dear...that's a lot of fretting! I, like you, am the bread-winner so to speak of the family. I have two wonderful children... who (gasp) went to daycare and loved it (my little social butterflies)! You will be a wonderful mother because it clearly is important to you to be. Seek balance, put work limits in place and all will be well.

I've been thru all of those same fears and am here to report that it is at times hard, at times successful, at times not...but then that is the joy in living and its all worth it!

Honey Doll
 

MissMissy

One of the Regulars
Messages
101
Location
The sticks
I am a homeschooling mother of three. I have stayed home since before my first was born, eight years now. I can't imagine doing any different however if our situation changed I would gladly do what I had to do to feed my family.

It would make me very sad indeed to send my children off to daycare or school and have some other person get to see their smiles, hear their jokes, and dry their tears.

I love creating a relaxing environment for my husband. He works so very hard for us, the least I can do is have a clean home with a positive atmosphere and a hot meal waiting for him. He would never demand these things of me, that makes want to give them to him and much more.

So what do I get out of this? Everything, absolutly everything! My husband would move mountains to please me, not out of fear of rejection or neglect (I don't play that game), but because he isn't happy if I'm not. I feel the same way about his happiness. :)
 

AmateisGal

I'll Lock Up
Messages
6,126
Location
Nebraska
Real Swell Gal said:
Well to be honest right now I have to say I am proud of myself for keeping up with my certifications over the years.
I now work for the US Airforce as a dental assistant and I love my job.
It also pays about the same as my husbands job did. The difference was my insurance is much more expensive than his so I only had single coverage that I was pretty much forced to take. Meaning my kids have no insurance right now. I would have no paycheck left. Another difference is that he worked more hours than I do. I work 32 a week and he worked at least 40.
Matter of fact for the last few months he had been working every Saturday overtime. He goes from overtime to laid off.
WTF??

So my biggest worries are insurance for my kids and how long he'll be off.

Real Swell Gal, so sorry to hear about your hubby's job loss. My hubby was without work for about four months last year when he had a staph infection that landed him in the hospital for three weeks, plus about a month of treatment afterward. He couldn't go back to his old job, so needed a new one. We lived on my paycheck during that time and got behind on the mortgage. Thankfully, he is a veteran so our VA loan helped us get on a repayment plan.

RE: your kids' insurance, I know that here in Nebraska they have insurance specifically for children when the parents cannot afford it. Do you think maybe your state has something like that? I'd definitely check into it.
 

olive bleu

One Too Many
Messages
1,667
Location
Nova Scotia
olive bleu said:
i used to be untill my husband became too sick to work and i had to get back out there in the rat race.I miss it horribly.

I want to add to this that this has worked out ok as it has meant that my husband has been the full time stay at home parent, and someone has been there at the end of every school day.That being said, i believe no one should really be beating themselves up if they have to( or choose to) send your kids to a sitter/daycare.I think as long as you are doing your best to provide the safest,happiest and most love-filled upbringing you can, you are doing fine.My husband has a house full of kids several times a week at lunchtime because my kids drag home friends that have nowhere to go for lunch as their parents are not at home, and no other arrangements have been provided, so otherwise, they just wouldn't eat.And maybe they have no support system or resources to do anything differently, i am certainly not saying this to be judgemental..I am just saying that if you kids are in daycare or at a sitters house..at least you know where they are.
 

Real Swell Gal

One of the Regulars
Messages
277
Location
Ohio
imoldfashioned said:
So sorry to hear about your husband RSG--I'll be sending good thoughts your way.
Thanks. Thanks for everyones support.
I have to say he does an excellent job keeping the house.
Maybe he should be a stay at home dad?:eek:
 

Charbeau

New in Town
Messages
23
Location
Midwest USA
I am a housewife too. I stopped working as a hairstylist when my daughter was born 2 years ago. Now I have another baby, a 2 month old son, as well. My husband travels quite a bit for his job so the house and kids are primarily my responsibility. I actually find it more rewarding and more challenging than working ever was! I wish I were a more adventurous cook, though. I'm trying so that should count for something. ;)
 

BombshellBella

Familiar Face
Messages
64
Location
New York City
I never thought I would be a housewife, but here I am...

I do take occasional consulting jobs but they are short term. In the mean time, I take care of my home, husband, and darling one year old daughter. I enjoy it but I also miss interacting with adults all day. Ah.
 

KittyVonKirsche

Familiar Face
Messages
88
Location
Perth, Australia
I always wanted to be a house wife. growing up I never wanted to work, jut to be a singer and a housewife.
I was a single mum of one girl for ten years . Ive been married for two years now n we have another little girl. When she starts school Ill find a job but purely from necessity. Id much rather be home running the household.
The only thing I really hate about being a SAHM is , as others have said, the lack of adult interaction. I find I get incredibly lonely :(
 

kamikat

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,794
Location
Maryland
BombshellBella said:
I never thought I would be a housewife, but here I am...

I do take occasional consulting jobs but they are short term. In the mean time, I take care of my home, husband, and darling one year old daughter. I enjoy it but I also miss interacting with adults all day. Ah.

It gets much easier as they get older. That first year is tough. Once she gets into preschool, you'll be able to meet the other preschool moms, have playdates and get out more. I recommend http://www.momsclub.org/ to all new moms! It's a great way to get out and meet other women in your position.
 

MarieAnne

Practically Family
Messages
555
Location
Ontario
I am a stay at home mom. I have a 10 month old daughter, Valentine. I'm thankful I've had the chance to take care of her, and my husband and my home. But I feel so isolated. I have a degree and I am looking for a full-time 'career'. I feel like I need to get out of the house and make my own money. Having adult conversations would be perk.
 

MissAmelina

A-List Customer
Messages
413
Location
Boise, ID
I am gearing up to be a stay-at-homer, and I do admit, I am a little afraid........even though I wouldn't have it any other way.

My mother-in-law said that she signed up for art classes (woodworking, ceramics, etc) and attended those twice a week while my hubby and his brother were little. She said it saved her life-- that she met quite a few other women in her situation and it gave her the opportunity to have those "adult" conversations. :)
 

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