Your favorite movie quotes

[Inkstainedwretch]

"If Superman and Mighty Mouse had a fight, who'd win?"
"Come on, Mighty Mouse is just a cartoon. Superman is a real guy!"
Stand by Me

 

[V.C. Brunswick]

"I think you got the wrong impression about me. In all fairness I should explain to you exactly what it is that I do. For instance, tomorrow morning I'll get up nice and early, take a walk to the bank, walk in and see you, and if you don't have my money for me I'll crack your f****** head wide open in front of everybody at the bank. And just about the time that I'm coming out of jail, hopefully, you'll be coming out of your coma. And guess what? I'll split your f****** head open again cause' I'm stupid. I don't give a f*** about jail. That's my business. That's what I do."

Nicky Santoro, Casino

 

[52Styleline]

"Away all Boats" Capt. Jebediah Hawks (Jeff Chandler): [at a Kamikaze about to crash into the USS Belinda] Get away from my ship! GET YOUR FILTHY PLANE AWAY FROM MY SHIP!

"The Young Lions" Michael Whiteacre Look, I've read all the books. I know that in 10 years we'll be bosom friends with the Germans and the Japanese. Then I'll be pretty annoyed that I was killed.

 

[rocketeer]

"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception". Has to be a Marx Bros film but I can't remember which

 

[Workhorse]

"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception". Has to be a Marx Bros film but I can't remember which


That is a Groucho quote. Most likely said to Chico. The Marx Brothers are pretty untouchable with regard to wit and one liners. W.C. Fields was pretty good too.

I can't remember which Marx film it was either. I'll see if I can find it.

Here is one from Horsefeathers:
Groucho: "In case I never see you again, which would add ten years to my life, what would you fellows want to play football?"
Chico: "Well first a we wanta football."
Groucho: "Well I don't know if we have a football, but if I can find one, would you be interested? I don't want a hasty answer, just sleep on it."
Chico: "I no think I can sleep on a football."

 

[Stearmen]

The station Agent:
Finbar McBride: I'm retired, actually.

Emily: Aren't you a little young to be retired?

Finbar McBride: No, dwarves retire early. Common fact.

Emily: Yeah, *lazy* dwarves.

 

[rocketeer]

"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception". Has to be a Marx Bros film but I can't remember which


That is a Groucho quote. Most likely said to Chico. The Marx Brothers are pretty untouchable with regard to wit and one liners. W.C. Fields was pretty good too.

I can't remember which Marx film it was either. I'll see if I can find it.

Here is one from Horsefeathers:
Groucho: "In case I never see you again, which would add ten years to my life, what would you fellows want to play football?"
Chico: "Well first a we wanta football."
Groucho: "Well I don't know if we have a football, but if I can find one, would you be interested? I don't want a hasty answer, just sleep on it."
Chico: "I no think I can sleep on a football."

I have actually used a couple of their one liners, most recently, "I'd like to help you out, which way did you come in". The victim was just speechless And the other was "Hello, I must be going" as someone arrived whom I did not wish to talk to.

 

[Benzadmiral]

From Billy Wilder's Witness for the Prosecution:

Elsa Lanchester's Nurse Plimsoll: "It's beddy-bye. We had better go upstairs now, get undressed and lie down."

Charles Laughton's Sir Wilfrid: "We? What a nauseating prospect."
*
*
Another exchange that I have to quote approximately:

Nurse Plimsoll: "I've never heard such language -- and I was a nurse in the war!"

Sir Wilfrid: "What war, pray tell, was that? The Crimean, no doubt?"
*
*
And yet, despite the sniping between them, Nurse Plimsoll admires Sir Wilfrid:

Nurse Plimsoll (watching at the trial, as Sir Wilfrid scores against the prosecutor): "Wilfrid the Fox! That's what they call him, and that's what he is!"

 

[Fading Fast]

From Billy Wilder's Witness for the Prosecution:

Elsa Lanchester's Nurse Plimsoll: "It's beddy-bye. We had better go upstairs now, get undressed and lie down."

Charles Laughton's Sir Wilfrid: "We? What a nauseating prospect."

Another exchange that I have to quote approximately:

Nurse Plimsoll: "I've never heard such language -- and I was a nurse in the war!"

Sir Wilfrid: "What war, pray tell, was that? The Crimean, no doubt?"

And yet, despite the sniping between them, Nurse Plimsoll admires Sir Wilfrid:

Nurse Plimsoll (watching at the trial, as Sir Wilfrid scores against the prosecutor): "Wilfrid the Fox! That's what they call him, and that's what he is!"

You are so right, she doesn't care that he's rude to her (and might even mean it), she knows he's a brilliant man and respects that so much that his personal rudeness isn't very important to her. It's a "touch the hem of his garment" motivation; she'll put up with whatever she has to to touch....

Rock stars, athletes, famous fill-in-the-blanks all have a certain number of touch-the-hem-of-his-garment fans that allow so many of them to be thoughtless, rude and even cruel in their personal relationships as some subset of the population will put up with all of it to just be in the orbit of their greatness.

Wilder does an outstanding job of capturing this.

Edit add: It was also a different time. Being nice - at least on the surface - is valued much more highly today than back when that movie was made. More exceptions were made for greatness then than now. It's a cultural shift - today most everyone tries to appear nice on the surface, back then it was less important for a superstar to also show that "common" touch.

 

[V.C. Brunswick]

"I can always guess how many jelly beans are in a jelly bean jar, even if I’m wrong" - Brick Tamland, Anchorman 2

"I love carpet. I love lamp."

 

[LizzieMaine]

"I never forget a face, but in your case I'll make an exception". Has to be a Marx Bros film but I can't remember which


That is a Groucho quote. Most likely said to Chico. The Marx Brothers are pretty untouchable with regard to wit and one liners. W.C. Fields was pretty good too.

I can't remember which Marx film it was either. I'll see if I can find it.

Here is one from Horsefeathers:
Groucho: "In case I never see you again, which would add ten years to my life, what would you fellows want to play football?"
Chico: "Well first a we wanta football."
Groucho: "Well I don't know if we have a football, but if I can find one, would you be interested? I don't want a hasty answer, just sleep on it."
Chico: "I no think I can sleep on a football."

"Sword-a-feesh!"

My favorite Groucho moment is in "Monkey Business," where a thick-headed ship's captain is on the trail of the stowaway Brothers. He confronts Groucho:

Captain: "One of them goes around with a black moustache!"

Groucho: "So do I, if I had my choice I'd go around with a little blonde."

The officer is clearly disappointed and unsatisfied by the poor, halfhearted quality of this joke, so he glares at Groucho and very carefully and deliberately sets up the straight line again.

Captain: "I said, one of them goes around with a black moustache!"

Groucho decides the only way to get rid of this oaf is to pull out all the stops:

Groucho: (in a sweeping, melodramatic tone) "Well you couldn't expect a moustache to go around by itself! Don't you think a moustache ever gets lonely, Captain?"

Chico: "Hey, sure, it gets-a-lonely. When my grandfather's beard gets here, I'd like it to meet your moustache."

Groucho: "Well, I'll think it over. I'll talk it over with my moustache. Tell me, has your grandfather's beard got any money?"

Chico: "Money? Why he fell hair to a fortune!"

The Captain asked for it.

 

[Trenchfriend]

Aliens (1986), Srgt. Apone and his "Marines-eulogy" for morning warm-up.

And I found Srgt. Apone so damn great. It seems, that Al Matthews didn't play Srgt. Apone. He just was Srgt. Apone, to me.

Just a further line:
"Hudson, come here. COME here!!"

Always gets me.

 

[emigran]

"I've pi$$ed my pants and I can't do anything about it..."
Deranged commanding officer to Kevin Costner in Dances With Wolves just before he's sent off to his Fort on the Frontier...

 

[V.C. Brunswick]

"I've pi$$ed my pants and I can't do anything about it..."
Deranged commanding officer to Kevin Costner in Dances With Wolves just before he's sent off to his Fort on the Frontier...

Played by the late John Vernon who is best known as Dean Wormer in Animal House.

 

[DesertDan]

The 13th Warrior
Ahmed Ibn Fadlan's (Antonio Banderas) prayer before the final battle.

“Merciful Father.... I have squandered my days with plans of many things. This was not among them.
But at this moment, I beg only, to live the next few moments well.
For all we ought to have thought and have not thought... All we ought to have said and have not said. All we ought to have done and have not done. I pray thee, God for forgiveness.”

 

[Workhorse]

"Sword-a-feesh!"

My favorite Groucho moment is in "Monkey Business," where a thick-headed ship's captain is on the trail of the stowaway Brothers. He confronts Groucho:

Captain: "One of them goes around with a black moustache!"

Groucho: "So do I, if I had my choice I'd go around with a little blonde."

The officer is clearly disappointed and unsatisfied by the poor, halfhearted quality of this joke, so he glares at Groucho and very carefully and deliberately sets up the straight line again.

Captain: "I said, one of them goes around with a black moustache!"

Groucho decides the only way to get rid of this oaf is to pull out all the stops:

Groucho: (in a sweeping, melodramatic tone) "Well you couldn't expect a moustache to go around by itself! Don't you think a moustache ever gets lonely, Captain?"

Chico: "Hey, sure, it gets-a-lonely. When my grandfather's beard gets here, I'd like it to meet your moustache."

Groucho: "Well, I'll think it over. I'll talk it over with my moustache. Tell me, has your grandfather's beard got any money?"

Chico: "Money? Why he fell hair to a fortune!"

The Captain asked for it.

That one is awesome Lizzie-

Monkey Business is one of my all time fave Marx Brothers films. They're all pretty good but I think that the older Paramount pictures don't get as much attention (comic genius credit) as some of the MGM ones. Shame too. The Paramount movies are beyond funny, and timeless wit. The timing on the older pre-MGM movies was off. There were too many jokes too close together in a row. The audience in the theater didn't have enough time to react, laugh and be ready for the next line/joke before they missed a few in between. Now that we can watch them at our leisure on DVD or what have you, we can stop and rewind to see the joke we missed while laughing so hard. You'll notice that the timing is better adjusted to the audience's reaction on the Thalberg pictures at MGM. The Marx's took bits of these scenes on the road to perfect the timing before the film was made. Thalberg was a genius in his own right, but all he did was give the Marx's timing a "tune-up" to make them even better than they already were.

Great quote.

 

[Inkstainedwretch]

From E.T.:
Elliot: He's a man from outer space and we're taking him to his spaceship.
Greg: Well, can't he just beam up?
Elliot: This is reality, Greg!

 

[Willybob]

"Well it's a nice, soft night, so I think I'll go and join me comrades and talk a little treason."
Michaleen Ol Flynn, The Quiet Man.

 

[Bigger Don]

From Billy Wilder's Witness for the Prosecution:

The opening of this movie is something I can watch over and again. It's great comedy by itself. To me it's reminiscent of 2 W.C. Fieldses going at it.

The movie is unusual in that it starts with this great humorous exchange then seemlessly drives itself to the tension of the court room, rather than using humor as "relief".

The early scenes are a prelude to the Billy Wilder movies that followed. Those are the movies that introduced me to him, then I finally saw this gem in its entirety, instead of just the last hour.

 

[Stearmen]

A warriors drink!