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Young loungers

Kirstenkat

New in Town
Messages
38
Location
New Jersey
I don't find offering seats up or opening doors rude. I'm big on female independence and equality but that's one chivalrous thing I find timeless. I'm always surprised and happy when a man or anyone holds a door for me because so many people let it slam in your face.
I think it['s more rude to act angry when someone offers to be nice even if you don't agree with it. If someone has a problem with it they can just politely say no thank you.
Really people's attitude these days shock me
 

Derek WC

Banned
Messages
599
Location
The Left Coast
I believe I've posted on this thread before, but I'll do it again. I'm sixteen and a half, yet at the same time, one hundred ten.

Kirstenkat: I always hold open the door for girls at my school, and even walk on the outside of the sidewalk when I'm passing a gal, and I've only received thanks for it.
What doesn't make sense is why somebody would be offended by having someone do something kind for you?
 
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LordBest

Practically Family
Messages
692
Location
Australia
I will open doors and tip my hat, but I will not give up my seat on the bus, tram or train. Why? Because I've been spat at, verbally abused and nearly physically assaulted for doing so. By women young and old. You can only push a chap so far.
 

Pompidou

One Too Many
Messages
1,242
Location
Plainfield, CT
I believe I've posted on this thread before, but I'll do it again. I'm sixteen and a half, yet at the same time, one hundred ten.

Kirstenkat: I always hold open the door for girls at my school, and even walk on the outside of the sidewalk when I'm passing a gal, and I've only received thanks for it.
What doesn't make sense is why somebody would be offended by having someone do something kind for you?

I imagine it's because of the context of who else gets said treatment and most likely the why of it. There's a bit of "You're not as capable of doing such yourself as I am" behind it, being lumped in with age old expectations to protect the women, children and the elderly and other such bits from the past when people didn't believe women could take care of themselves. On one hand, it is just a well intentioned gesture, and 90% of the time should be interpreted as such because most people do it just because they were taught to, as a simple good gesture. On the other hand, because of its past, it could be interpreted as a bit condescending, and I think that's why it gets mixed reactions. I know when work needs to be done and I'm about to lift something, and another person comes up and says, "That's kinda heavy, why don't you let me take that?" it bugs me in about the same way, I imagine, though I just say, "Thanks, I've got it".
 

Derek WC

Banned
Messages
599
Location
The Left Coast
I open doors just to be kind. I am, however, very traditional and believe that men should look out for women, not saying that they are helpless, but I like giving girls a hand when the look like they need it, and they are usually grateful in the end. Pardon the run on sentence.

That's interesting, LordBest. I wouldn't think that somebody would be so aggressive about an act of kindness.
 

MissLaurieMarie

One of the Regulars
Messages
173
Location
Alberta, Canada
As a woman, I also open doors for others. Sometimes I even slow my step so I make sure I can hold the door. It's just nice. I'm a independent woman, but I don't get offended if someone does something for me. I just say "thank you" and accept or say "no thank you" and carry on my merry way. There's no need to make a fuss out of it. It would be like lashing out at someone for saying bless you when I sneeze (I'm an atheist), because they were just being polite.
I wouldn't lash out at someone for opening a door for me or offering a seat or anything like that. Why punish someone for being polite, which is becoming such a lost "art" in our society?

L.
 

Tiller

Practically Family
Messages
637
Location
Upstate, New York
I will open doors and tip my hat, but I will not give up my seat on the bus, tram or train. Why? Because I've been spat at, verbally abused and nearly physically assaulted for doing so. By women young and old. You can only push a chap so far.

What the hell? Seriously? Island of convicts indeed.
 

beth

Familiar Face
Messages
72
Location
Houston
Does anyone else find it harder to maintain your vintage lifestyle when your young?
I would like to start expanding my meager vintage wardrobe. I'm beginning to think it will take awhile, however. :) Back to the point, even if I don't wear dresses or vintage clothing, I stand out from the rest of the girls in my class, who wear ill-fitting tee-shirts, sweats or uggs. I always try to look neat and presentable, adding little things, such as heels or wearing lipstain. I don't like a lot of attention, but I also love vintage. As I incorporate more vintage into my wardrobe, I think it will get very difficult for me. It is nice to know I won't be alone.

I feel as though I just rambled, I apologize!


I will open doors and tip my hat, but I will not give up my seat on the bus, tram or train. Why? Because I've been spat at, verbally abused and nearly physically assaulted for doing so. By women young and old. You can only push a chap so far.

That is shocking and upsetting. :/
 

Romy Overdorp

One of the Regulars
Messages
275
Location
The Netherlands
Today at the bus stop I got some nasty looks from a girl who wore sweatpants tucked inside her uggs.
She looked at her friend and started to roll her eyes or something, I just figured they are jealous because I look like an actual woman.

The bus driver was quite an ass himself as well... He drove off but there was a woman running and waving him to stop because she wanted to come with the bus. He stopped (surprising because those Dutch drivers just leave you behind most of the times) and let her in. One minute later she yelled: OH crap my keys! I forgot my keys! Please let me out again! Whereto he replied: Geez woman you're such a pain in the ass!
I was kinda shocked.
 

Marla

A-List Customer
Messages
421
Location
USA
Does anyone else find it harder to maintain your vintage lifestyle when your young? I assume once I graduate and get an office job it will feel less awkward but in the environment I'm in now it's odd. Though It's easier in my main classes as I'm a graphic design major and art kids are more open to alternative styles.

There will always be pressure to conform to the norm, in an office or at school. At least in college there isn't a dress code everyone is expected to follow, and anything "goes". Thus, feathered vintage hats mingle freely with baseball hats and dainty heels trod the campus paths alongside the uggs.

In offices, there are official (and unofficial) workplace dresscodes that all employees are expected to conform to. In college, I can wear a frou-frou hat and heels to class and no one can tell me to stop. In an office, some degree of conformity is expected, and refusal to comply could put one in bad standing.
 

kyboots

Practically Family
Interesting thread as I have had this discussion many times with my brain over the past 10 years, and in attempting to teach my young son; plus we all work and there is business and pleasure travel. New York is bad, London is worse. Hard to find good examples anymore.
Prior to this thread my decision was: I will wait,hold and open doors; stand when a lady enters or leaves the room or table, be polite and still say yes and no mam ( or sir ); but the train and bus are entirely different as we all work for the equal pay, and we are all equally tired at the end of the day. The only exceptions are the handicapped and the elderly, and that is not sexist. An elderly man or a woman will still get my seat.---John
 
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englishrose

New in Town
Messages
5
Location
England
Hi! I'm 19 (20 next month) and have been interested in anything historical since birth pretty much. Devoured books/films/tv programmes on anything from the Georgians onwards. The last few years I've been concentrating mainly on the 30's and 40's. Find it amazing how people coped during the war and how everyone looked out for each other (whereas nowadays everyone is just out for themselves - as demonstrated this morning when a man just blatantly walked straight into me even though he saw me coming and just expected that I'd move out of his way).
I try to be as polite as possible as my parents brought me up not to swear, ask to leave the dinner table and generally be respectful to other people! Will always hold doors, give up my seat to an elderly or disabled person etc but am not too fussed whether a man does the same for me or not.
Try to live as 1940's as possible with regard to not wasting anything, saving as much energy as possible and eating seasonally and locally. Even tried living on rations for a week! Think I would miss cake too much to do it long term (I'm a bit of a baking addict). Don't really have the figure to fit into actual 1940's clothes (all so skinny from being on their feet all day/rationing!) but am looking into repro and love collecting vintage items and curios!
Sorry if I've rambled! Just so glad to have found this thread and so many other young people into vintage/history when I thought I was the only one!
 

RodeoRose

A-List Customer
Messages
415
Location
Vermont
Oh, I like this thread! I'm 18 and I have been wearing vintage almost exclusively since I was 16, though I've always been drawn to the past (mostly Edwardian through 1950s). I've never met anyone who does the whole vintage dressing and lifestyle thing my age before, so it's nice to know I'm not alone!

Does anyone else find it harder to maintain your vintage lifestyle when your young?

I think Marla summed it up much better than me, but I just wanted to chime in that I think it's much easier to be vintage as a youngster. Young people are given a lot more free reign to experiment with their looks, and can get away with much more. My red lips, novelty print vintage frocks, seamed stockings and four inch heels may be A-OK on my college campus, but I know once I've graduated and am thrust into the adult world I'm going to have to tone it down a bit.

Also: I can really relate on the roommate front. I can't tell you how funny it is; I'll be sitting at my vanity, setting my hair, wearing a 1940s floor length silk nightie and dressing gown, while they just crash into bed in the same sweatpants and t-shirt they wore all day with their makeup still on their face. To each their own, of course; but we are such contrasts, we've agreed it's like a sitcom or something lol.
 

GoldenEraFan

One Too Many
Messages
1,164
Location
Brooklyn, New York
I'll be 21 soon, and I've liked the Golden Era since the day I was born. Even at a young age in the early 1990's I prefered my dress shoes over sneakers, a flat cap over a ball cap and a sport coat over a wind breaker. Middle School was an era where I pushed my preferences aside in an attempt to "fit in", but in High School I went back to dressing the Golden Era way, and I continue to now in College. No matter what day of the week, I dress in the formal or casual style of any decade between the 1920's-1950's. In general I've always had a complete fascination with the 1890-1965 era, whether it be cars, clothes, architecture, music, movies, cartoons etc.
 

Maguire

Practically Family
Messages
619
Location
New York
I've probably posted in this thread here before, but interesting to see this thread is already 5 years old, some of the folks mentioned here are probably already way above the "under 25" now. I wonder how many still post here or still have this interest. I have since i can remember, and i always liked to dress neat and clean cut, but now i find it less out of place, being 23 instead of 17-18. a look at an old bread line photo or picture of folks at a movie theater or even just at a dance hall makes one teary eyed when one sees their equivalents today.
 

GoldenEraFan

One Too Many
Messages
1,164
Location
Brooklyn, New York
a look at an old bread line photo or picture of folks at a movie theater or even just at a dance hall makes one teary eyed when one sees their equivalents today.

I know exactly what you mean. Even in later years, I look at how people dressed in the '50s-'70s and comparing those decades to now makes one teary eyed. I understand how the styles change over the years, but how did fashion sense just get up and leave? I look at photo's of 5th avenue up in midtown in the '50s and everyone is dressed their best, compared to today, except for business people I see people dressed for the beach, yet they look at me like I'm out of place.
 

Juliet

A-List Customer
Messages
368
Location
Stranded in Hungary
Now, I don't want to offend anybody and this is not a attack on ANY alternative styles.

But isn't it funny, that it's more accepted if you have 25 piercings on your face and wear pants with holes in them (maybe only in Europe, but yes it is! Because it's personal freedom, don't you know) or a neckline down to the waist, and people feel that they have to tone down the red lipstick, frock, petticoat, hat, heels etc.
Just remarking, yes? :)
 
Messages
10,883
Location
Portage, Wis.
Isn't that a shame, Juliet. My ma hates and I mean HATES my fedoras and my vintage clothes and my response is always that I could look like all the other 20 year olds. Like a punk.
 

MissLaurieMarie

One of the Regulars
Messages
173
Location
Alberta, Canada
Now, I don't want to offend anybody and this is not a attack on ANY alternative styles.

But isn't it funny, that it's more accepted if you have 25 piercings on your face and wear pants with holes in them (maybe only in Europe, but yes it is! Because it's personal freedom, don't you know) or a neckline down to the waist, and people feel that they have to tone down the red lipstick, frock, petticoat, hat, heels etc.
Just remarking, yes? :)
:eusa_clap

I've also heard people comment that dressing vintage is anti-feminist, because you want to go back to an age where women had less rights, something I don't agree with at all!

I find the 20s-40s all about women gaining independence and finding a voice, all while looking good and supporting a family & country at war.
 

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