"Wives with Beehives" coming to TLC

[hailey greenhat]

...if Dollie had not been edited to be the villain, would she have spoken out at all?

I think that anyone with a blog would have told their side on their space regardless of how they were cast. In the case of Dollie she now has the job of defending herself and "setting wrongs right".
Personally i thought that everyone knew by now that if a camera comes into your life to just say no if you only want the real you portrayed (it's been 20 years since the first Real world).

 

[PrettySquareGal]

Have any of the other participants spoken out about their experience, or do they have blogs? I'm curious about their take, too.

 

[sheeplady]

The whole thing kind of smacks of women hating, and I really think that is the path reality tv has taken. It's rare to see a woman on reality tv who isn't protrayed as (insert choice sexist slur here). I think anyone expecting anything different (and I'd include that review that seems to take more issue with the ladies than the producers in that) has failed to pay attention.

Btw, that review really gets under my skin, becuase it takes less issue with the show than the women, whom the writer seems to believe are totally to blame for having some very human traits.

 

[Oh lala!]

Apparently they didn't hear about what happened to the ladies on "Time Warp Wives".

What happened to them?

 

[LizzieMaine]

They were savagely attacked by bloggers and message-boarders in the so-called "vintage community" for being "delusional" and "anti-feminist" among other jumped conclusions. Turns out that show was just as manipulated and creatively-edited as this one.

 

[matrioshka]

Why doesn't someone do a show on "1940's-type Women Who Take Your Patronizing Crap And Jam It Right Down Your Throat." I think there's probably a few of us here who'd be up for that.

Huzzah!

 

[tonyb]

Thanks for the heads-up on what else to avoid in the vast and wondrous universe that is cable TV.

I hope I never become one of those delusional and self-satisfied old cranks who professes that he doesn't give one hoot about what any other person thinks of him. Still, I don't much concern myself with what most others might make of my choice of attire (a fair amount of old stuff) or household furnishings (ditto), because I like it, and the people whose opinions on such matters matter to me seem to like it well enough, too.

My current home dates from 1993. It is furnished in pieces dating from early in the 20th century to early in the 21st, with the emphasis on the middle of that range. Same for my clothing. People less well-versed in old stuff (that's most people) can be counted on to call it "vintage," which is OK by me, seeing how that's at least factually accurate, or "retro," which isn't OK by me, because the stuff isn't retro, at least not by my definition. It's the Real McCoy, the genuine article, and not some more recently made piece of whatever contrived to evoke the style of a bygone era.

I have yet to encounter the assuming types that I hear some folks here complain about. All that my clothes and home and all of that stuff says about me is that I wear certain clothes and live in a certain home. It doesn't make me a better person, nor a worse one. It doesn't say that I long to live in an earlier time, or that I don't, for that matter. And to the best of my knowledge, no one I know makes such assumptions.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Men don't have to worry about being attacked as "traitors to feminism" and other such things -- but any woman who chooses to follow the so-called "Vintage Lifestyle" has to be prepared to be on the defensive every step of the way: especially if she isn't being ironic about it.

 

[tonyb]

We've noted here before that any "reality" TV show that realistically portrayed the lives of its subjects would be a very short-lived show.

Truth is, the day-in, day-out lives of guys who deal in antiques and collectibles, or the offspring of B-list celebrities, or people who happen to have a fondness for the styles of the 1950s, are no more interesting to the vast majority of the potential TV audience than are mine or yours or Bob's around the corner. So the creators by necessity inject a narrative into the proceedings.

By the sounds of it, in the case of this "Beehives" show (which I've mercifully been spared), that narrative gives offense. If that's a common view in a larger world than our little one here, it'll either take another tack or die.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Thing is, it isn't the outsiders who are the issue, by and large -- it's more often the "vintage community" itself that does the attacking. When "Time Warp Wives" came out in 2008, there were some truly vicious attacks made on the participants by members of the Lounge itself -- most of them women -- and it got really nasty really fast, only to lead to a lot of "oh, uh, we didn't know" backpedaling when the truth came out: that show was as much a hyped-up fiction as the current one is.

Basically, there are two factions in the "vintage world" -- those who collect the clothing and the styles and leave it at that, and those whose interests are more atavistic than aesthetic. There are far more collectors than there are atavists -- even here on the Lounge, I'd estimate there's probably less than a dozen regular posters who fall into the latter category -- and when these shows come along they're produced by people who don't understand the difference: "Oh, you're into the fifties, or whatever decade -- so let's emphasize the clothes and the furniture and all that, and oh yeah, we notice you have a computer and tattoos and all, so we're going to play up this contrast for all its worth and make you look really shallow and delusional. Oh, and you enjoy being a stay-at-home mother because it's a role you're comfortable in? Great! That'll really get people fired up."

I don't know any of these gals personally, so I don't really know what their personal slant is, but whatever it was that kind of approach does them a disservice. But more so, it emphasizes what I said earlier: the only way there will ever be an honest, sympathetic documentary about 'the vintage life' is if actual 'vintage people' produce it. And that's never likely to happen because they'd never buy it.

 

[PrettySquareGal]

Men don't have to worry about being attacked as "traitors to feminism" and other such things -- but any woman who chooses to follow the so-called "Vintage Lifestyle" has to be prepared to be on the defensive every step of the way: especially if she isn't being ironic about it.

I read this comment about the show on jezebel.com and was floored by the viciousness of it:

GastonGastoff 3 days ago

Everyone, just **** off with your "I choose my choice" malarkey.

Feminism does NOT mean that we are forced to support the choices of anyone in possession of a va****. Some choices work against the greater good of woman kind and serve to dismantle the gains made by the feminist movement. Some women choose to internalise misogyny and all that is negative about the patriarchal system. Some women's choices have wider societal implications.

Your crappy "but it's their choice" faux feminism does nothing but give women who willingly hyper feminise themselves within the traditional patriarchal model a weak ass excuse for their actions. Worse still it takes away from the important fight we have undertaken to secure bodily autonomy for all women, for the vindication of women's rights. Choosing to willingly subjugate yourself to your husband has no place in this fight. As a feminist I will not support you in this endeavour. You chose your choice, deal with it.

http://jezebel.com/5971904/tlcs-wives-with-beehives-is-kind-of-really-depressing?post=55674826

 

[LizzieMaine]

Exactly. "Freedom for me, but not for thee," the cry of the fundamentalist no matter what the stripe.

There's a reason why these shows never focus on men. You never see, and will never see a "Time Warp Husbands," "Husbands With Brylcreem" type of show, because the stir-the-pot factor isn't there. They focus on women in these shows specifically to hold the women up to implied ridicule because of their life choices, not simply as a function of plot. It's a viciously, viciously misogynistic attitude -- put forward by exactly the sort of people who stand up and cry "we've come so far!"

 

[tonyb]

I can't say with any confidence that I know who this "vintage community" is, or if I would be a self-identified member of it if I ever found it.

Sure, it's nice to have things in common with folks. Birds of a feather and all that. But beyond an interest in old stuff, I don't know that I have one whole helluva lot in common with folks here, or that I don't, for that matter. And I prefer it that way. The ban on political discussions keeps things tolerable for people of all political stripes (although some folks are more mindful of that rule than others). I am quite appreciative of those who did (and do) the heavy lifting around here, and of those who so generously share their particular knowledge on these matters.

I'm a bit taken aback to learn how some members of some "vintage community" or "rockabilly community" or whatever community rip into others in those very communities for some sin against just what I couldn't say. Vintage purity? Beats me. And I'm left to wonder why a person would remain in such a "community" if that's how they treat one another.

 

[tonyb]

Exactly. "Freedom for me, but not for thee," the cry of the fundamentalist no matter what the stripe.

There's a reason why these shows never focus on men. You never see, and will never see a "Time Warp Husbands," "Husbands With Brylcreem" type of show, because the stir-the-pot factor isn't there. They focus on women in these shows specifically to hold the women up to implied ridicule because of their life choices, not simply as a function of plot. It's a viciously, viciously misogynistic attitude -- put forward by exactly the sort of people who stand up and cry "we've come so far!"

It's apparent, then, that the "reality" show isn't really about people with a taste for 1950s styles. The producers are interested in capturing and holding an audience, so whether they build their narratives around curvy rockabilly chicks or fat ladies with yippy little purse-size dogs doesn't matter one whit to them.

And you're right: It's women made to look frivolous. There are plenty of oafish male characters in TV land, but not in these "reality" shows, at least none of which I'm aware.

 

[V.C. Brunswick]

I read this comment about the show on jezebel.com and was floored by the viciousness of it:

GastonGastoff 3 days ago

Everyone, just **** off with your "I choose my choice" malarkey.

Feminism does NOT mean that we are forced to support the choices of anyone in possession of a va****. Some choices work against the greater good of woman kind and serve to dismantle the gains made by the feminist movement. Some women choose to internalise misogyny and all that is negative about the patriarchal system. Some women's choices have wider societal implications.

Your crappy "but it's their choice" faux feminism does nothing but give women who willingly hyper feminise themselves within the traditional patriarchal model a weak ass excuse for their actions. Worse still it takes away from the important fight we have undertaken to secure bodily autonomy for all women, for the vindication of women's rights. Choosing to willingly subjugate yourself to your husband has no place in this fight. As a feminist I will not support you in this endeavour. You chose your choice, deal with it.

http://jezebel.com/5971904/tlcs-wives-with-beehives-is-kind-of-really-depressing?post=55674826

Owwww! My ears are ringing from the shrillness.

 

[Memo]

http://www.facebook.com/pages/Wives-with-Beehives/549653451730390

 

[Fletch]

Men don't have to worry about being attacked as "traitors to feminism" and other such things...

Some of the more sartorial among us would obviously draw homophobia. But gay guys deal with that every day. So we straights would just have to put our big boy pants on and sally forth. (Small s on sally, please. )

 

[PrettySquareGal]

Owwww! My ears are ringing from the shrillness.

I have a vintage themed blog and have had a couple of people leave me comments like this one although not as vile. It's astonishing to me that some so called feminists seem to think they know what's best for all women, and would in an instant take away other women's freedoms to placate their own insecurities and ideas about how women should lead their lives.

 

[sheeplady]

I read this comment about the show on jezebel.com and was floored by the viciousness of it:

GastonGastoff 3 days ago

Everyone, just **** off with your "I choose my choice" malarkey.

Feminism does NOT mean that we are forced to support the choices of anyone in possession of a va****. Some choices work against the greater good of woman kind and serve to dismantle the gains made by the feminist movement. Some women choose to internalise misogyny and all that is negative about the patriarchal system. Some women's choices have wider societal implications.

Your crappy "but it's their choice" faux feminism does nothing but give women who willingly hyper feminise themselves within the traditional patriarchal model a weak ass excuse for their actions. Worse still it takes away from the important fight we have undertaken to secure bodily autonomy for all women, for the vindication of women's rights. Choosing to willingly subjugate yourself to your husband has no place in this fight. As a feminist I will not support you in this endeavour. You chose your choice, deal with it.

http://jezebel.com/5971904/tlcs-wives-with-beehives-is-kind-of-really-depressing?post=55674826

Ouch. I really don't like the presumption that a woman who stays at home is subjugating herself to her man... I've known a number of women who work who unfortunately really are doormats for their "partners" and a number of women who stayed at home that ruled the roost. I do think there is a problem if you raise your children to believe that there is "one right way" or preach that there is "one right way" to others.

I love the faux feminism comment.... someone needs a refresher on first, second, and third wave feminists and should be sent to his or her room until they are finished.

 

[RockabillyHolly]

My friend was an was a hired extra on a prank show years ago, so reality TV has always been "tweaked".
I do have to wonder though...if Dollie had not been edited to be the villian, would she have spoken out at all?

Hi, I'm friends with Dollie and can assure you from her Facebook posts that she spoke out quite a bit during filming. She even got in trouble with the producers for putting it on Facebook. She stated plainly that they were editing it to be something it wasn't. I live in the area and heard tons of grumbling about the show over the summer. I knew it was going to be bad.