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Why is bow on left side?

AbbaDatDeHat

I'll Lock Up
Messages
8,870
Recent Sociologic Historians have discovered the lost archives of hat bow thinkers.

Forward thinking hat makers realized that in the future the necessity to distinguish like-grouped individuals of biological and anatomical identities. In 1949 the Society of Human Intelligence Thinkers (SHIT), headed by George Orwell confirmed the future devolution of traditional identities necessitating a covert system whereby the human subject could be identified visually without violating new social assignments.
At the time the issue of hat bows was limited to two, left side or right side.
Since those at birth, biologically assigned male used the left side of their brain for reasoning, bows were assigned on the left, right brain and whole-brained reasoners were assigned right bows.

The Society (SHIT) concluded that future bow numbers and bow positioning would need to be determined by future Department of Internal Policy and Security of Human Invisibility Thinkers (DIPSHIT) in accordance with Doublespeak Initiative Counsel of Kindred Spirits (DICKS), regulated by Big Brother.

The Society (SHIT) concluded the devolution of the two bow system, necessitating covert display of unlimited bow numbers and placement as determined by unknown numbers of self assigning groups, thus leaving room around the bulk of the ribbon for public display of non-biologic/anatomic identifiers.
These enlightening new discoveries reveal to hat wearers the ability to appreciate those forward thinking hat makers and their vision to see how much hat’s speak….or double speak as it were.
These same historic archive discoveries have been found to have been edited out of the original Orwell novel as per the Decree of Enforcement by DIPSHIT and the Counsel, DICKS, regulations, leaving hat wearers much to ponder.
B
 
Messages
19,465
Location
Funkytown, USA
Recent Sociologic Historians have discovered the lost archives of hat bow thinkers.

Forward thinking hat makers realized that in the future the necessity to distinguish like-grouped individuals of biological and anatomical identities. In 1949 the Society of Human Intelligence Thinkers (SHIT), headed by George Orwell confirmed the future devolution of traditional identities necessitating a covert system whereby the human subject could be identified visually without violating new social assignments.
At the time the issue of hat bows was limited to two, left side or right side.
Since those at birth, biologically assigned male used the left side of their brain for reasoning, bows were assigned on the left, right brain and whole-brained reasoners were assigned right bows.

The Society (SHIT) concluded that future bow numbers and bow positioning would need to be determined by future Department of Internal Policy and Security of Human Invisibility Thinkers (DIPSHIT) in accordance with Doublespeak Initiative Counsel of Kindred Spirits (DICKS), regulated by Big Brother.

The Society (SHIT) concluded the devolution of the two bow system, necessitating covert display of unlimited bow numbers and placement as determined by unknown numbers of self assigning groups, thus leaving room around the bulk of the ribbon for public display of non-biologic/anatomic identifiers.
These enlightening new discoveries reveal to hat wearers the ability to appreciate those forward thinking hat makers and their vision to see how much hat’s speak….or double speak as it were.
These same historic archive discoveries have been found to have been edited out of the original Orwell novel as per the Decree of Enforcement by DIPSHIT and the Counsel, DICKS, regulations, leaving hat wearers much to ponder.
B

Pure Shakespeare.
 

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