Thirtysomething woes

[John in Covina]

Hey gang...I just turned thirty. Well...like, on the 22nd.
I was excited at first, but now it's beginning to dawn on me that I'm only going to get older. And I'm not the person I want to be...I'm not doing the things I want to do...(although these are changing!) Anyone else have experience turning thirty and it being a good thing? I would love to hear some stories. Please.

If you feel like that now, try turning fifty!

 

[Miss 1929]

Yikes!

If you feel like that now, try turning fifty!

Don't remind me...

 

[Flivver]

Looking from the vantage point of 56, I'd give anything to be 30 again. At that age you can still accomplish almost anything you desire. But as you get into your forties and especially your fifties, doors of opportunity can begin to close.

And I totally agree with Imoldfashioned when she says that the older you get, the faster time passes. Why it seems like just yesterday that I was 30 like you! It *really* does!

 

[zaika]

i want to thank everyone for all that was said in this thread. i appreciate everything from the positive to the more wistful, and am taking it all to heart.
i think that part of my problem is the fact that i have been focusing on fulfilling social obligations that my peers have fulfilled. i.e. marriage and kids. it's not like i don't want that, i want it very much, just not now. if it happens, i won't stop it...but this isn't a dream i want to chase. it's just that i am really tired of the pitiful looks i get from the wedded and kidded in my circle. [huh]
however...i've realized that a door is open to me right now to realize a lifelong dream. i wouldn't be able to chase after it at any other time except for now. i am financially and emotionally stable...two important advantages i didn't have in my twenties.
so...thirties and beyond...look out.

 

[Miss Neecerie]

Bah....your life is all downhill and closer to over then ever before. 30 marks the start of the end.













*someone had to counteract all this sweet advice.

 

[epr25]

I struggle with the same feelings about turning 30. I know this awful to admit and terribly vain but I really really dread aging. I was a life guard and I am convinced that I am at the edge of turning into a prune at any given moment. As far as the aging aspect how difficult is that to handle?

 

[Edward]

it's just that i am really tired of the pitiful looks i get from the wedded and kidded in my circle. [huh]

Oh, I know that one alright. It's not such a big deal to me being on my own as I never wanted kids, and the older i get (33 now), the more comfortable i am with being myself and not caring about having a relationship. It does become incredibly tedious when other people can't get a handle on that and assume that I can't possibly be happy on my own, or otherwise define me by my relationship status. [huh]

Turning 30 wasn't a great time for me, but that was coincidental with a whole heap of other mess I had going on at the time. Genearally I'm much happier in my 30s than ever I was in my 20s.... the most liberating thing I ever did was to stop caring what other people thought of me, and I think the confidence to do that came with the 30s. I still find the annual birthday a singularly depressing occasion, but the actual experiences of being in my thirties is pretty good. Just wish I could stay here lon ger than I have left of them!

 

[Twitch]

I never felt old or unfullfilled at 30 or 40 for that matter. I was in good health then and couldn't have bothered thinking about all the health and med crap I have gone through in the past 3 years. For a couple years before that my Mom was failing in health and we had to look out for her care and constant transportation to doctors, buying food, meds and such for her.

Count your lucky stars you're in the prime of your life! :eusa_clap If find it strange in 2008 that something a benign as hitting the young age of 30 is in any way negative or involved with dred. Except for women who kidded they hit the big three-oh I've never heard of anyone lamenting about the fact.:eusa_doh:

 

[deadpandiva]

30 was awful for me. I had just moved back to Minneapolis after the worst year of my lif in California and I had no job. more than three years latter and I haven't really adjusted to life in my thirties. But truthfully I don't think it's being thirty that caused the problems for me, it was being born.

You seem to be very talented and you should be able to get to where you want to be in life. I think some people just get there later rather than sooner.

 

[AmateisGal]

Turning 30 was easy. But it was the next two birthdays that I had a hard time with. For some reason, hitting the thirty + one (two and soon to be three) mark really struck me hard.

I sometimes wonder how I got to where I am - owning (and driving!) a car, holding down a job, a mortgage, a husband, kids, two dogs and three cats...when did it all happen? When did I become, *gasp*, an adult?

 

[Paisley]

Hey gang...I just turned thirty.

Well...like, on the 22nd.

I was excited at first, but now it's beginning to dawn on me that I'm only going to get older. And I'm not the person I want to be...I'm not doing the things I want to do...(although these are changing!)

Anyone else have experience turning thirty and it being a good thing? I would love to hear some stories. Please.

If this birthday gives you a kick in the pants to start doing the things you've wanted to do, all for the better.

I went to Florida for my 30th birthday and had a great time. My 40th birthday is next year and I'm planning to go to Hawaii.

You mentioned that you want to get married and have kids, just not right now. I don't think it's a good thing to wait too long. I'm 38, and I haven't found very many men my age to choose from. Those who are available come with kids and exes, or they're ill at ease around women, or they're not marriage material. OTOH, I've heard several married people say they would love to trade places with their single friends (for a day or longer). I imagine your wedded and kidded friends haven't been wedded or kidded all that long.

 

[Rosie]

I've been 30 for a month and I feel basically the same. I've done everything or at least comparably everything I've wanted to do in so far as career, education, etc. but, haven't done the marriage and children thing yet. Sometimes, admittedly, I feel kind of sad about not fulfilling my goals in that part of my life but, overall, I have a good life. I'm healthy, I'm sane (seemingly), I'm financially okay, I'm happy. Believe me, life could be much, much worse.

 

[pretty faythe]

When I was younger I was always so self-conscience (sp?) of stupid things

Ya know what? I'm 33 and still do do stupid things...lol Its just me, who I have always been and who I always will be. It's part of my charm When I was getting ready to turn 30 the movie 13 Turning 30 or somethin like that was out, and a line from that was my motto, and still is to some extinct. "30, flirty, and thriving".