Things You Learn as an Old Car Driver

[Stanley Doble]

"How do you gain access to the seat? Other than, with a great deal of difficulty."

If you take a close look you will see a step plate on the rear fender (wing). You open the rumble seat and climb in over the side. A good place for young couples to cuddle, not suited for the elderly, unathletic or broad of beam.

 

[GHT]

Who remembers crossply tyres, (tires) positive earth, distributors, carburettors, dynamos, brushes, the one inside the dynamo, exhausts that roared before all the chemical catching safety nets, leaded fuel, upper cylinder lubricant, in the UK they were known as shots, just don't down one like a whisky, a friendly pump assistant who checked your oil, cleaned the windscreen and filled your tank?

We had AA guys, on motorcycles, who saluted you when they saw your membership badge. And we never had seat belts, airbags, or speed limits on our major highways, the ones we call motorways. You were only over the alcohol limit if you couldn't walk a straight line. Did you know that Percy Shaw, the inventor of the cat's eye, only came up with idea after driving into a ditch whilst three sheets to the wind, and practically unable to stand? He still managed to get out of the ditch and drive home.

 

[Stanley Doble]

I remember all those things. I used to be the friendly pump attendant who filled your tank, washed your windows, checked your oil, and pumped up your tires. I even wore a clean blue shirt, a black leather bow tie and a cap. I was 13 years old when I had my first gas station job.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

That 6 volt systems and vacuum wipers stink out loud lol

 

[Tomasso]

the friendly pump attendant who filled your tank, washed your windows, checked your oil, and pumped up your tires.

Those were the days my friend,
I thought they'd never end........

 

[LizzieMaine]

That 6 volt systems and vacuum wipers stink out loud lol

Nah, as long as your wiring's good and your hoses aren't leaky they work fine. Of course, you might want to pull out your throttle knob a bit when you're stopped at an intersection.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

I've discussed doing such a thing at our shop, if the car end takes off.

It was a Sinclair Station/Car Dealership, built in 1951

Those were the days my friend,
I thought they'd never end........

 

[vitanola]

Who remembers crossply tyres, (tires) positive earth, distributors, carburettors, dynamos, brushes, the one inside the dynamo, exhausts that roared before all the chemical catching safety nets, leaded fuel, upper cylinder lubricant, in the UK they were known as shots, just don't down one like a whisky, a friendly pump assistant who checked your oil, cleaned the windscreen and filled your tank?

How about priming the petcocks with an oil can filled with gasoline first thing in the morning, putting neat's foot oil on the leather face of the cone clutch to keep it from getting grabby, using "tire spoons" to pry a flat clincher tire off of a non-demountable rim, adjusting the rheotomes on both (or all four) ignition coils, replacing "flat" batteries of dry cells, knocling loose stuck balls in the carburator, scraping carbon, lapping valves, staking loose cages for Hyatt bearings, lining transmission bands with cotton belting or hickory wood, filling grease cups, "total loss" oiling systems...

 

[Talbot]

Nah, as long as your wiring's good and your hoses aren't leaky they work fine. Of course, you might want to pull out your throttle knob a bit when you're stopped at an intersection.

Being a bit of a purist I agonised a little over converting to 12V, but I have to say I'm glad I did it. It is not obvious to the naked eye and you get more pep in starting.

A 6V horn on 12V has an arresting sound and gets a lively response from fellow motorists.

I'm going to stay with vac wipers, but I have to say they are not my favourite. They seem to work their slowest when you need them most.

 

[vitanola]

That 6 volt systems and vacuum wipers stink out loud lol

I've always thought of them as luxuries for the lazy.

 

[Stanley Doble]

Vacuum wipers and 6 volt electrics worked well for years and are still adequate if not sensational. But 50+ years of use take their toll and old cars do require maintenance.

 

[Stanley Doble]

"I've discussed doing such a thing at our shop, if the car end takes off.

It was a Sinclair Station/Car Dealership, built in 1951"

OK but this time I want more than 90 cents an hour.

 

[Warbaby]

At our local gas station they still pump the gas, check your oil and wash your windshield.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

Deal lol

"I've discussed doing such a thing at our shop, if the car end takes off.

It was a Sinclair Station/Car Dealership, built in 1951"

OK but this time I want more than 90 cents an hour.

 

[LizzieMaine]

"I've discussed doing such a thing at our shop, if the car end takes off.

It was a Sinclair Station/Car Dealership, built in 1951"

OK but this time I want more than 90 cents an hour.

"You'll get 80 cents, and like it. Now stop fahtin' around an' reline the brakes on Mrs. Pendleton's Hudson!"

 

[KILO NOVEMBER]

vacuum wipers

This reminded me of something from my driver's ed class in high school back about 1970. This was not a course you studied for, it was a course you took so your dad could get a discount on his car insurance once his sixteen-year-old son got a driver's license.

On a written test, one of the questions was, "What are the two types of windshield wipers?" As I learned later, the answer was "vacuum" and "electric", but I hadn't done the homework, so I drew a picture. You can play along at home. Hold your arms straight out directly in front of you. Now move them so that each points at roughly 30 degrees, left arm out 30 degrees to the left and right arm out thirty degrees to the right. Got it? OK!

Now bend your elbows 90 degrees so your hands point upward. Now we get to the answer I wrote on the exam.

Bend your arms to the left and then to the right, repeat. That's the first kind of windshield wiper.
Next, bend your arms from the vertical position toward the center-line of your body, so the fingers almost touch.
Return your hands to the starting position, repeat. That the second kind I illustrated on my exam paper.

That answer was marked as incorrect, but I still feel that I should have got style points.

 

[Zemke Fan]

Things you learn as an old car driver.

* Your reflexes ain't as good as they was when you was 80.
* That tinglin' in your bottom ain't from a protrudin' spring.
* Turnin' your blinkers *off* really is optional.
* The use of *one-finger* hand signals should be avoided unless you're packin' heat.
* As long as your eyes are at least 1 in. above the steerin' wheel you're A-Okay.
* It's okay to check out pretty gals, but only if you keep your gear-shift in *park*.
* The term *old fart* really does have more than one meanin'.
* If someone asks if you've got a monkey wrench in the jockey box, you know what they're talkin' about.

 

[Stanley Doble]

"You'll get 80 cents, and like it. Now stop fahtin' around an' reline the brakes on Mrs. Pendleton's Hudson!"

If I showed up at Trotter's B/A station in 1968 looking like that I would have been fired on the spot. I am not kidding.

We wore uniforms which we paid for ourselves. They had to be clean and pressed. Black bow tie and cap. Shoes shined. Washrooms cleaned twice a day. Lot swept and flowers watered every day. We had flower pots made of old tires turned inside out, remember those?

Every Saturday we moved the welders and other equipment outside and scrubbed the shop floor with kerosene or Red Stalllion floor cleaner. If a job ran long too bad, you stayed until the shop was cleaned and spotless, and no overtime pay.

We had the best garage and the best service in town and were proud of it.

 

[GHT]

* Your reflexes ain't as good as they was when you was 80.

* The term *old fart* really does have more than one meanin.'

If you put those two points together, can I add a word of advice?
Never trust a fart.

 

[tonyb]

Vacuum wipers and 6 volt electrics worked well for years and are still adequate if not sensational. But 50+ years of use take their toll and old cars do require maintenance.

Out here, where it is quite hilly (downright mountainous, once you get more than a few miles out of town), and where it has been known to rain on occasion, vacuum wipers will have you affixing a plastic Virgin Mary statuette to the dashboard. Pulling those long uphills in a downpour, when the wipers won't flap at all, is a wholly faith-based undertaking.