Things I'm Sick of Hearing at Job Interviews...

[Paisley]

Things I'm Tired of Seeing from Applicants

I haven't interviewed people, but I've observed coworkers go through the process of hiring.

A few years ago, we advertised for an two admin people. We got 200 resumes. The vast majority of them were from people who were clearly unqualified. Many of the resumes were full of spelling and grammatical errors. Out of 200 resumes, maybe three people were qualified. We hired two people, one of whom quit a few days after we sent her out of town for training. The other one doesn't have any aptitude for what she was hired to do and blames other people for her mistakes, but since she made friends with the boss, she's still around.

The way applicants show up for interviews doesn't always inspire confidence. We've had people call us and say, "Is my interview today?" We've had women show up with uncombed hair, wet hair, and sleeveless shirts. Keep in mind, they were interviewing at a major CPA firm downtown.

So, I don't have sufficient backup to take a two-week vacation. However, that makes me the only game in town at my job. And it's great that I don't have any qualified people trying to take my job.

 

[Warden]

I once went for a job at the House of Lords, 15 minutes of my 20 minute interview was the panel of 8 people trying to decide on what tea to drink. It went something like : -

"Earl grey everyone?" Ho I don't know its a bit early, how about Darjling? and so on. I just said a cup of Tyhoo would do me.

I did not get the job and I often wondered if it was the tea question that cost me the job?

Harry

 

[Twitch]

On the other side of the desk, much of the problem lies with the interviewer. I once worked for Snelling & Snelling placement services and learned taht beyond the slick resume the interviewer should have proper training in interview technique. With many smaller firms this is lacking and it becomes an off the wall, seat of the pants decision.

Even larger places that have large amounts of employees with an actual personnel department get carried away with psychological tests and obtuse questions.

Many resumes are received from people with no experience in the field the job is for and they're hoping to switch careers. A one page resume consisely worded is best too. Forget 2-3 page novels extolling your virtues. You can elaborate on key points in the interwiew.

Make sure you basically ask for the job if you want it by making certain the interviewer knows you are interested. After you leave he could have a doubt of your sincerity and you become a resume again instead of a person.

 

[Maj.Nick Danger]

I hate the whole one sided, you need us more than we need you attitude that the majority of employers and interviewers have. That game totally sucks!
If I ever have to go for an interview again in my life, I will turn it around and in effect interview them.
"Why should I spend my time here and use my valuable talents working for you?!" :cool2:

 

[Michaelson]

I guess the oddest situation I ever found myself in happened not once, but TWICE in the interview process.

I went through all the process, jumped through all the hoops, and after (in one interview that lasted almost 4 hours) everything had been said and done, had the main interviewer say 'well, thanks for coming in. We have no openings at this time, and really needed the practice in interviewing folks whenever we DO have an opening. Your resume was so interesting, we HAD to have you in to meet you. Thanks for dropping by!":rage: :eusa_doh:

Regards! Michaelson

 

[Daisy Buchanan]

I guess the oddest situation I ever found myself in happened not once, but TWICE in the interview process.

I went through all the process, jumped through all the hoops, and after (in one interview that lasted almost 4 hours) everything had been said and done, had the main interviewer say 'well, thanks for coming in. We have no openings at this time, and really needed the practice in interviewing folks whenever we DO have an opening. Your resume was so interesting, we HAD to have you in to meet you. Thanks for dropping by!":rage: :eusa_doh:

Regards! Michaelson

That is just wrong! How horrible. I would have gone off on them for wasting so much of my time!

 

[Senator Jack]

Something I've always wanted to do:

1. Go to an interview for a job I really didn't want.
2. Be spectacular at the interview.
3. Nab the job.
4. Go to my first day of work dressed in a full admiral's uniform complete with medals and a bicorne hat just to see how they would go about firing me.

 

[Michaelson]

Honestly, I was to tired either time, and didn't feel like wasting any MORE of my time on them....let alone giving them ammo should a future interviewer call them to ask how THAT interview had gone, only to discover I had read them the riot act.

Not exactly a good plan for future employment.:eusa_doh:

Regard! Michaelson

 

[Kt Templar]

I would have been sorely tempted to bill them for wasting my time. If they were slow in paying I'd take then to the small claims court. That's for having the gall to admit that they'd called you in under false pretenses.

I too have never got a job through an interview, usually I've ended up temping and before too long has passed they've asked me to become permanent.

 

[Michaelson]

Works in theory, but all they'd have to say is 'we interviewed him. No job was promised, and none was offered.' End of case.

Ah well, it was educational though. Sort of....[huh]

In the long run, the one position disappeared a few months after the department was dissolved (at a television station), and the other company has gone belly up, as technology has passed them by, and they had to close their doors. It's just as well I didn't land either job.

Regards !Michaelson

 

[imoldfashioned]

Oh, I feel for you Lizzie. I’ve had some grade A idiot comments made to me while interviewing too. That is, if they bother to acknowledge that they got your resume at all—which is one of my pet peeves.

My favorite was back when I was just out of college. I had a screening interview where I was told the lawyer I’d be working for had been known to “infrequently throw chairs” while his secretary read aloud from the Bible. I needed the job so badly I didn’t bother to ask if the two actions were related, said I didn’t mind and got an interview with the man himself.

After about 5 minutes of the most belligerent questions he asked me, accusingly “why are you applying for this job, you should be a paralegal!” By this point I knew there was no way I was working for this jackass, so I became emboldened and said “do you have any openings for a paralegal?” He seemed taken a aback and answered no. “Do you know of any openings for a paralegal?” I pressed. He sputtered a bit and began backpedaling that he had lots of friends who were probably looking. “Well, give me their names then and I’ll try to get a job from them.” And he did! I never called them because I had no interest in or training to become a paralegal but it cracked me up nonetheless.

Some people are crazy, that’s all I can say.

Something good will come your way Lizzie, I just know it. Hang in there!

 

[LizzieMaine]

Thanks -- I'm sitting by the phone right now waiting for a call back on an interview I did last week. It was the interview where all the guy wanted to do was talk about the theatre -- "wow, what kind of projectors do you have?, etc. etc" -- but there were opportunites to do some writing, so I'm hoping for the best. Called and left a message this morning, and if I dont hear back soon I'm gonna try again...

 

[Paisley]

Lizzie, if you end up needing something temporary, you might try an accounting firm. Between audits and taxes, many of them need extra help this time of year.

 

[s7eng]

My worst experiences in interviews.

2 Hour interview that ended in a 30 question exam, only to find out they were offering less than the fast-food joint down the street.

Being passed off to an employee that had never done an interview in her life, because the owner took one look at me and said "No way would I hire him".

Interviewing for a management position within the company I worked for turned into a grilling/witch hunt of things being done wrong.

Asked if I ever had any problems with any other employees to which I responded... personally no, but when someone cannot do their job properly and I have to clean up their mistakes yes. They hired the woman I was talking about over me.

 

[John in Covina]

I guess the oddest situation I ever found myself in happened not once, but TWICE in the interview process.

I went through all the process, jumped through all the hoops, and after (in one interview that lasted almost 4 hours) everything had been said and done, had the main interviewer say 'well, thanks for coming in. We have no openings at this time, and really needed the practice in interviewing folks whenever we DO have an opening. Your resume was so interesting, we HAD to have you in to meet you. Thanks for dropping by!":rage: :eusa_doh:

Regards! Michaelson

*************
In the past 2 years i have had the same situation 2X and also have a number of times had where they did not read my resume and interviewed me for something totally outside my experience. I have had where i came in and asked enough questions of the people running the place that they figured out they were not ready to do what was need to be done to do the job right.

Many businesses focus on daily crisis management with no plans to become proactive. Many have a lack of focus, and i have even worked in places that had departments sabotaging each other. The main thing is the horror show only becomes apparent after you have been there for a while. So not getting the job may have been a blessing.

 

[Paisley]

The "crisis management" observation is true of most places where I've worked. That's what led me to start doing a little interviewing of employers during job interviews. "What happened to the last person who had this job? And the person before that?" "Have you ever been late making payroll?" "Have you laid off anyone in the past three years?" "How many clients do you have?" I see the management letters (i.e., list of accounting suggestions) for a lot of companies. Although those companies are our high-quality clients, it's surprising how many businesses operate so close to the edge: three clients, two suppliers, one person doing the bookkeeping (hello embezzlement), zero growth. And everything they have is mortgaged.

Of course, sometimes it never got to the interview stage. When I was an engineer, 22-year-old guys from temp agencies would call and say, "So, you're an electrical engineer with 10 years' experience and you know CADD?" "Uh, I'm a mechanical engineer with two years of experience and I don't do drafting."

 

[redavis001]

Part One

I: Why do you want to work here?

Me: I would prefer not to work at all but you see you own the means of production as well as the capital. I don’t. Thus I have to trade my labour for the access to the means of production. You will pay me he lowest wage possible so that your surplus labour can be turned into profit in order to purchase more of the means of production and capital in order to increase your labour surplus.

I: We’ll call you…


Part Two

Once I had to take a math test for a job an advertising sales agency. It was mainly cost per point and things like that but it also had long division, something I had not done in oh, I don’t know ten years. I sat in a room by myself “calculatin” for two hours. When I finished the interviewer said “Wow, you took longer than anyone” I said, “Well I have not done long division by hand in years.” The interviewer said “Oh, we meant to give you a calculator” I said “that would have helped” The job was not offered to me.

 

[Tango Yankee]

Still waiting for my first "real" interview

I've not had much experience with job hunting. After I retired from the AF I tried my hand at truck driving but there wasn't a sit-down interview for that.

I'm an IT manager by training, education, and experience. Unfortunately, I live in an area where there are very few opportunities for IT professionals. I did submit resumes for a while but heard nothing back. I don't know if it was because of my lack of technical certifications and experience or the fact I live 1 1/2-2 hours from where the decent jobs are. I decided to go get my certifications to go with the degrees. After wrapping those up I'll get serious about job hunting again and hopefully actually get to an interview!

I did find a well-paying network admin position near where I live and applied at the end of November, but they've yet to start interviewing. (I followed up with a couple of phone calls.) Keeping my fingers crossed on that on! I'm hoping that the fact the job calls for a security clearance and I happen to have one helps to get me invited for an interview.

Heck, I wish SOMEONE would call for an interview--I could use some practice!

Cheers,
Tom

 

[Spitfire]

Something I've always wanted to do:

1. Go to an interview for a job I really didn't want.
2. Be spectacular at the interview.
3. Nab the job.
4. Go to my first day of work dressed in a full admiral's uniform complete with medals and a bicorne hat just to see how they would go about firing me.

Reminds me of one of my fellow ad-people - a copywriter, who had long blond hair. He went to a jobinterview and got a job at the agency, where I also worked. Now, what none of us knew, was this guy had suffered from some kind of illness, that had left him with no hair at all. And he had carried a toupe for many years.
At his first day at the new job, he came in bald as a newpolished egg.
After some time, the CO asked him: " 'cuse me, but didn't you have hair, the last time we spoke?" And this guy answered:
"Year, but I thought it was me you hired, and not my hair!!!":eusa_clap :eusa_clap

 

[thetankw/ahat]

my interview for the zoo went like this.

i: why do you want to work here?
me: i need a job.
i: yes but why the zoo?
me: i like animals.
i: you're aware you wont be working with the animals?
me: yeah i dont really care though. i need the experience.

oddly enough that got me the job where i get to see animals all day.