The value of Lady's friendship

[Lady Day]

Hi Ladies,

Over the past few days, I have been thinking more on how key friendship between women can be in ones life. I dont just mean women who you see on a regular basis, or women who you have something in common with, but real friendship that borders family ties.

Over my life, I have been fortunate to have had about three women with whom I consider a closeness that can rival family. I love them, and more importantly, I know they love me. No matter our agreements, disagreements, or what have you, there is a bond that can never brake weather it be a job, distance, or death.

Ive talked to my 86 year old Granny on this, and altho she had girlfriends, she would speak with a fondness of a few women that just made her glow.

I was wondering, Ladies, what are your tales of friendship? Do these women still shape your life? If so, how? Are you still in contact?

Please share

LD

 

[Paisley]

I just talked to her last night. We had a ball working at two different jobs together. We're very different, though; people who know both of us don't understand why we're friends. We just click.

 

[LizzieMaine]

The best friend I've ever had, or ever will have, lives in New Hampshire -- she understands me, I understand her, we both come from difficult backgrounds, we've both dealt with unusual challenges, and we share a common worldview. I think it's safe to say we're the sort of friends who are closer than sisters -- as it happens, my sister and I can't stand each other, and she's got four sisters who think she's the family oddball, so you can see we were fated to develop the sort of friendship that endures anything life can throw at it. If I ever catch hold of that winning lottery ticket, I'm going to buy us a duplex, where we can live happily ever after with a mess of cats.

 

[Vanessa]

My best friend has always been, and always will be, my mother. We may have gone through a rough patch during a couple of teenage years (that I'd like to forget), but I feel extremely lucky and continually blessed that I am so close to her. We travel together, we shop together, we talk to each other every day. Maybe it's a family tradition because I know she and my grandmother were just as close.

 

[Rachael]

I have been very blessed in the sister-friend catagory. There are three women who I would never want to be without and could never choose one over the other. I think of them as my graces, since each inspires me in a different way and each has her own strength.

One friend is my confidant, whom I could tell anything and no one could wring a single detail from her (they've tried). Another is the playful friend who is always planning excursions to the coast or, better yet, the fabric store. My third friend is many years my senior and very nicely fills the role of mother for me. She has been down all those roads that are before me, and I treasure her sage and honest advice.

Given that I was very lacking in the 'family' catagory, I have come to see these wonderful women as my true family. Holidays, birthdays, triumphs, losses, are all shared with these three. Other folks who don't bother to call can read about me in the paper.

 

[Inky]

Aside from my mother, my two best female friends are both far away now, but we touch base as often as we can.

I have found it's so much harder to make good friends the older I get and that makes me sad.

 

[Miss Molly]

I have many friends at the moment, but I would say I have 2 friends already who I just know will be there for me no matter what. I know I'm only young but we've been friends a long time, and we've already been through a lot together and I just know that above all the others they will be with my forever. And yes, I find they both have different roles for me. One's older and one's my age but they're both incredibley special.

 

[AmateisGal]

I met one of my closest friends while in college - and though we only live a few hours away from each other, we manage to see each other only once a year, if that. She is an extremely busy person - has always been that way and just thrives.

It's a testament to our friendship, however, that we can go for months without talking to each other and when we finally do connect, it's like no time has gone by at all. There's no awkwardness or anger at having not touched base for so long. Guess we just understand each other pretty darn well.

 

[Foofoogal]

Such a timely post. I was just thinking about friends today.
I still have a longtime friend from 1972. They befriended me at a time when I needed it. Though we have lived far away for years we still contact each other often.
I have a best friend of 17 years who I stopped talking to for 5 years. Still not quite sure why but now we are best friends again. Due to this fact I know how loyalty works now. I can trust this person.
I also have been very surprised to see how fast friends can come and go. Not just peers but people I really thought I could count on
I am in a new area and excited about finding my new best friend. I tell my grandbabies you may be one day or hour away from someone that will change your life forever as a best friend.
I moved alot as a child so knew I had to make friends fast as I would probably be moving on soon.
I have had a few older friends and am hankering lately for an older friend to get some tips on life from. (wish this was in the OB)

 

[pigeon toe]

Shelley, you actually met my best friend! The girl with me at the Vintage Expo, Lisette, and I have been friends since we were 16. I've only recently considered her to be my best friend, but she's been so important to me for as long as I've known her. We met at an arts summer program. She's definitely one of the smartest, most creative and outgoing people I know. I like to think that she brings those things out in me when I am with her.

My other best friend and I have been friends since the 7th grade. I still consider her one of my best friends, but she moved to New York a few years ago. We only see each other once or twice a year now, but we talk on the phone a lot. I can see it being one of those friendships that will just keep on going despite the distance. We are always there for each other through the hard times and that's what matters.

 

[Fleur De Guerre]

My best friend and I are very different. I am a single, independent, vintage-wearing, bookworm, internet addicted, media worker who grew up in a very boringly normal middle-class, nuclear family with 2.4 children and went to private school. She looks like a very typical, mainstream fashion following girl who has very few qualifications, has barely read a book in her life, has never opened or sent a single email to date but singlehandedly runs a very successful shop and works every hour god sends. She also grew up in the circus. Without going into too much detail she has had a horrendously hard life, and still does, with caring for her father, who has Alzheimers inbetween her 70 hour working week and being in a very, very complicated relationship. Not being big headed here, but I genuinely think that our friendship is one of the only things that keeps her sane.

We meet at least twice a week, going to yoga classes and swing dancing, and visiting each others' homes, where we ply each other with homemade food and cake. Despite appearing to be so different we actually have a lot of stuff in common, and can chat for hours, though I have to say it's usually her getting her heartache off her chest. But I am happy to listen and offer such comfort as I can, and she is such a strong person that I am filled with admiration for her. She is also an extraordinarily generous, loving and loyal person despite everything she has to deal with. We've been friends for 10 years, and I can't imagine ever not knowing her.

 

[Miss Sis]

I am very lucky to have so many friends who fill different needs. I have friends here in the UK and friends in New Zealand and also a few around the rest of the world.

My best friend lives in NZ. We met at our ballet class when I was 13 and she was 14, but it took us a while to really become friends - actually years! About 5, infact. I was very outgoing and she was shy. Our ballet teacher who has been teaching since the year dot said she has never had two girls become such friends and STICK at it after they left. Funnily enough, we both also consider that teacher a great friend.

It doesn't matter how long we haven't been in contact for (and sometimes it is months/years), as soon as we meet/e-mail/chat, it is like we only saw each other yesterday. That is REAL friendship. My other friend I met through my best friend is just the same, so I suppose she is my other best friend! And when the three of us get together, it is the best, funniest, heart-warming time.

I don't have any sisters, but they are as close to me as sisters could be.

 

[Barbigirl]

~

As I have gotten older I appreciate the female friends and the different roles they have played in my life. My oldest friend Kelley, I have known since 9th grade, we don't talk so much now due to life's busy-ness but she is like a sister to me, another aunt to my girls.

Two other long time girlfriends Andrea and Briana get very high honorable mention.

And my sister Becky, who in the past we have had a tumultuous relationship has in the last couple of years risen to the top of my best friend list. Her generosity and help have been far and above average.

Of late I have really been making a point to cultivate good girlfriends and thinking on it I have about 3 more that I see fairly often.

 

[Lauren]

I have a few girlfriends who have been there through thick and thin. They're always there to listen, to scold me when I need it (but in a loving way), and to help encourage and just have fun with. Although some of us have different perspectives on what may be going on in the world or different interests, we have a mutual respect that really makes our friendship grow and stay strong. I am so thankful for them. It's nice to have friends you can slum around with in grungy clothes and just be "real" with, and also play dress up with. My best girlfriends have seen me in nasty clothes and smeared eyemakeup and in my emotionally worst state and still love me despite that lol.

 

[Lady Day]

*bump*

LD

 

[Elaina]

I find it difficult to be friends with women. I've tried to be friendly with a few, and things were going on in my life that made it hard to maintain the friendship, and it failed, or I've tried to get to know women I'd like to be friends with and they're not interested in knowing me.

Not to say I don't have women friends, but my close friends are men I've known for 20+ years.

 

[Helysoune]

I've had two very close friends in my lifetime, and been sisterly with a cousin as well, but in all three cases, life has a funny way of intervening. Moving away, marriage, work and kids all seemed to slip in the middle of our friendships and kinda made us drift apart, though I can and still do talk to them online. I hope to make friends here in Ohio, but I haven't really been able to so far, and I feel that teensy bit of an empty spot for it. I think it's so important to have at least one good girlfriend to be able to gab with and though I've got a couple of work acquaintances, but couldn't go so far as to consider those "friendships". [huh] In due time, I'm sure...

 

[SayCici]

Maybe it's because I'm still really young, but I don't have friends like that. I have good girlfriends that have been around since middle school, or friendships I had during a time I really needed them, but no one that has 'shaped my life'. They are the kind of friendships though that can go weeks, months or longer unspoken, and then once you have 10 minutes, you've been caught up and you really never missed any time at all.. I'm a hermit so I don't make friends easily and once I have them, I'm not the kind to always be texting/calling/whatever.

I'm really lucky to have an amazing family, so I naturally have been able to have those indestructible bonds with them.

 

[i_am_the_scruff]

My mum is my best friend. But aside from her I don't have much in the way of friends.
I had a best friend, who wasn't female but a gay male, we were best friends since we were 11. We met in school and me and my family did alot for him.
Unfortunatly all throughout our friendship he did alot of hurtful things to me. The most recent thing and it seems the thing that has ended our friendship was I text him asking for some money he owes my mum and for some of my things back that he had borrowed. I got no reply so I called and he got a girl to answer saying it wasn't his phone even though I knew it was. Then one night I was woken up by a phone call with someone calling me fat and saying things like that and all along I could hear my "best" friend telling the person what to say in the background.

I have a couple of other friends I see occasionally.. well, rarely as I don't live in the area anymore. I don't get to speak to them much either.

As i'm jobless and I don't know anyone in the area I live in now I literally sit at home all day everyday on my own untill my boyfriend comes home.. and even then i'm pretty much on my own, apart from having the most beautiful dog in the world with so much personality. She's my world.

During and after school I think the reason all my friends drifted away from me and didn't invite me out was because I don't drink and sleep with anything that walks.

Sorry to depress you all!

 

[GlamourDoll]

I agree with SayCici. I'm still fairly young but I haven't had luck of experiencing such great friends. I have 2 women in my life that I have been good friends with since elementry school that keep in contact. We're all very different but for some reason we all just click when we see each other again. But for the most part I'm just very shy. So to meet people and be friends is just really hard for me.