The general decline in standards today

[sheeplady]

... one extremely vulgar man ate everything on his plate and then demanded that it be comped because it wasn't very nice. The waiter was in tears, the restaurant closed within a couple of months. How is that an OK way for anyone to behave?

One casual (but very good place) we used to eat, we had one of our regular waitresses. This one table seemed to be giving her problems, because she kept running back and forth. Turns out that this woman was complaining about everything. Not enough of this, too much of that, too hot, too cold. I heard the waitress talking to the manager, and the manager was saying that the woman demanded a free meal, and that she does this every Thursday when she comes in. The manager wouldn't give her one this time, because she had been doing it for months. She didn't look like she was so destitute that she needed to do this to feed herself or her son, either.

I've only ever complained about service once, in a JC Pennies. I even told the supervisor I complained to that I was 26 and had never complained before about service to someone. I haven't done it again in the past 4 years. I just don't get how these people think it's ok to make a fuss over nothing.

My parents would have slapped me if they ever got that call...

It I was caught shoplifting as a kid (I never shoplifted, so no reason to get caught) I don't think I'd be here. My parents would have locked me in the cellar and neglected to feed me, after my mother near beat me to death. (My mother never hit me, but in this circumstance, she probably would have.) There would also be all sorts of shaming involved, probably for the rest of my life, in public.

 

[scooter]

I, on the other hand, try to be overly generous when tipping a decent server. Both my daughters were waitresses, and I know how important tips are to these folks. I just figure they need that extra dollar or two more than I do, and I always go out of my way to be polite and friendly.

I once walked into a Dunkin Donuts for a bagel and a cup of joe. At the counter ordering in front of me, was a gorgeous young blonde. The young lady behind the counter was a "plain jane" and probably new at the job. The beauty was haranguing "Jane" mercilessly, and it appeared she was intentionally misleading her in order to ridicule her for a "mistake". This went on for several minutes, and a line formed behind us. The beauty finally completed her order, and snatched it from "jane", who stood helplessly with tears forming in her eyes. As "beauty" turned to walk away,I stepped up to the counter, smiled at "jane"and in a booming voice, said, "Man, she was a rude b!tch, wasn't she!" My comment delivered peals of laughter from the line behind me, a huge smile of gratitude from "jane", and I sincerely hope a dose of humiliation to "beauty".

 

[Chas]

Oh, man.

I have been working as a Psychiatric Nurse for 20+ years and can't tell you how many "oh, that's so wonderful. You must be a special person to be able to do that" I have heard.

My stock answer is "well, thank you for that but I have to tell you, I could never go back to waiting on tables. The general public are much harder to deal with than the insane".

 

[Mr. Hallack]

I've worked in both a retail job and a mental health group home. The people in the group home were a lot more pleasing to work with. A lot of the general public are completely whacked!!

 

[V.C. Brunswick]

One casual (but very good place) we used to eat, we had one of our regular waitresses. This one table seemed to be giving her problems, because she kept running back and forth. Turns out that this woman was complaining about everything. Not enough of this, too much of that, too hot, too cold. I heard the waitress talking to the manager, and the manager was saying that the woman demanded a free meal, and that she does this every Thursday when she comes in. The manager wouldn't give her one this time, because she had been doing it for months. She didn't look like she was so destitute that she needed to do this to feed herself or her son, either.

 

[Widebrim]

I've only ever complained about service once, in a JC Pennies. I even told the supervisor I complained to that I was 26 and had never complained before about service to someone. I haven't done it again in the past 4 years. I just don't get how these people think it's ok to make a fuss over nothing.

I worked at Penney's (about the time you were born :eusa_doh as a very young salesman. Usually the customers were okay, but one woman in particular became increasingly irritated when I insisted that I could not accept a credit card without proper ID (how that has changed!). She ended up getting so mad, that she picked up a fairly weighty and sharp sign holder, and threw it at a very delicate spot on my body. Fortunately, the angle of the sign holder's trajectory was off just a bit, so I didn't fall down on the ground in pain. I instead walked around the cash wrap, stood up straight, nose-to-nose with her, said, "They don't pay me enough to take that," and (I'm sorry to say) pushed her. I then proceeded to walk into a stockroom, trying to compose myself. After returning to my cash wrap, the store manager (an old-fashioned stickler, under whom my mother had worked), came to me and said, "I heard what happened, Lee. I don't blame you." and walked away...

 

[MikeBravo]

Would you like to know what's really horrible? I could tell them that and they would say, get ready, "I don't know them, so I don't care." I'm not even kidding, that's how bad it is.
So many of the people my age just have this disrespect that's really disgusting. I'm not trying to say I'm better than any of them, because I'm not, but when I see the way some of them act...

This may come as a surprise to you, R.G., but you actually are better than them!

Get some nice friends, because their behaviour will be associated with you, because you are associated with these people. The best thing you can have in life is good friends above all else

 

[AtomicEraTom]

I hear ya. I was management at K-Mart, my brother worked there, and my sister still does. We could tell you horror stories about the things that have been done to us, said to us, etc. I've seen many employees badgered to tears. People have no heart nowadays.

I've worked in both a retail job and a mental health group home. The people in the group home were a lot more pleasing to work with. A lot of the general public are completely whacked!!

 

[Puzzicato]

(A bit off topic.) I can understand your reaction to what this "religious" individual did, Puzzicato, and there is no excuse for his actions. However, we are greatly limiting ourselves if we judge the validity of a religion/philosophy based on the contradictory actions of someone claiming to be a practitioner of said religion/philosophy. (If such were the case, we wouldn't be able to adhere to the ideas of any organized or collective group.) Although to those around him, that particular youth pastor would be viewed as a representative of his faith, he obviously was not following its teachings, and therefore dis-qualified himself of such identification. The validity of any religion or philosophy does not, then, hinge upon the acts of someone clearly not in accord with its teachings, and therefore should not be judged based on the hypocrisy of said person(s). Any set of beliefs needs to be judged by what its actually teaches or proposes, and by whether the claims that it makes can be empirically validated.

-Lee

Lee, as I said it was only the beginning of the end. I have known many other religious people who walk their talk, and those people are a joy to know.

 

[sheeplady]

I long ago decided that "Customer Service" jobs were some of the hardest jobs on this earth. I don't know where people get the idea that you should treat someone behind the counter/ waiting on you/ etc. like they are scum. Granted, I have to say that I have sometimes run into people who make a very bad name for others in these professions. Some might deserve a harsh warning, dock in pay, or even being fired if it is long running; but physical or verbal assault is out of the question. Their punishment for being unprofessional is something that is decided by their boss, not the customer. (This is true in every profession, there are "hacks" in my profession that should get tossed too.)

I won't eat out at places that have high server turnover. To me that is a bad sign that they treat their employees poorly. I'm very picky about going places where the staff are treated well. I also won't eat at a place again where I see the manager yell at a server(s) in front of the public. That's unprofessional and uncalled for. Some of the places we eat out most frequently aren't "high class" but we "know" the servers, most of them have been there for 3-5 years, and they are professional and friendly. The food's good, too.

I believe if you don't have the money to tip, you shouldn't go out to eat, because you can't afford to eat out.

 

[scotrace]

Conversely, I've learned that being very pleasant with all the service people one encounters will make them just about turn inside out to help you if you ask. The jerk across the way who is grunting and demanding has a hard time getting more coffee. But smile and say please and thank you and your cup will never be less than half full. People will break a good sweat looking for something in the stock room in your size if you ask courteously.
And it has always been a test of mine with friends or dates. If I see them treat service people (especially in restaurants) the least bit curtly... well. It's not a good omen.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

Funny you mention that. I once got asked out by the McDonald's drive-thru girl, because I was so nice, polite, and used my please/thank you.

Conversely, I've learned that being very pleasant with all the service people one encounters will make them just about turn inside out to help you if you ask. The jerk across the way who is grunting and demanding has a hard time getting more coffee. But smile and say please and thank you and your cup will never be less than half full. People will break a good sweat looking for something in the stock room in your size if you ask courteously.
And it has always been a test of mine with friends or dates. If I see them treat service people (especially in restaurants) the least bit curtly... well. It's not a good omen.

 

[ScionPI2005]

And it has always been a test of mine with friends or dates. If I see them treat service people (especially in restaurants) the least bit curtly... well. It's not a good omen.

That is very true...

 

[LizzieMaine]

I think the most important thing to remember in dealing with service personnel is that *you aren't their superior.* They're working for a living the same as you do, and are every bit as entitled to your respect as you would be if someone visited you at your workplace.

If you go up to a clerk or waitress or counter person and try to give them the high hat, don't think they won't pick up on it. And you won't be spoken of with respect when you leave.

 

[C-dot]

If you go up to a clerk or waitress or counter person and try to give them the high hat, don't think they won't pick up on it. And you won't be spoken of with respect when you leave.

Sometimes it will come back to get you before you leave. Working as a supermarket cashier in high school, we did some pretty sneaky things to people who were rude to us: Tax the tax, press our nails into their meat, "accidentally" put holes in their bags...

(Be kind to people who handle your food.)

 

[R.G. White]

This may come as a surprise to you, R.G., but you actually are better than them!

Get some nice friends, because their behaviour will be associated with you, because you are associated with these people. The best thing you can have in life is good friends above all else

You're right, honestly. That's why I can't wait to start college. New beginnings.

 

[Old Rogue]

I imagine they hired him to speak because a presentation that followed corporate HR guidelines would be no better than asking everyone to review the company handbook. Like Rambo, or like the A-Team, he was brought in to do things the suits couldn't do and still be eligible for promotion. That's my hunch. Sometimes I get thanked privately for saying things people in certain positions in a group want to say but can't. The only difference is, this guy is getting paid for it. Unfortunately, his message was lost on a not insignificant portion of the audience.

I think your hunch is dead on, and you are right that what was a very powerful message was somewhat obscured by the delivery.

 

[Mojito]

Conversely, I've learned that being very pleasant with all the service people one encounters will make them just about turn inside out to help you if you ask. The jerk across the way who is grunting and demanding has a hard time getting more coffee. But smile and say please and thank you and your cup will never be less than half full. People will break a good sweat looking for something in the stock room in your size if you ask courteously.
And it has always been a test of mine with friends or dates. If I see them treat service people (especially in restaurants) the least bit curtly... well. It's not a good omen.

Absolutely. I remember being startled one morning when I was having breakfast with an aquaintance (couldn't really call her a friend)...I didn't want to do the big breakfast option, so I asked the young waiter very politely if I could just have beans on toast. He went and checked and came back with a smile, saying they could do that for me. After a few more pleasant interactions that were fairly run of the mill, the girl I was with said suspiciously "He has a crush on you! He's so intent to look after you!". I was very surprised, as that wasn't the case at all - I'd just been polite since he'd shown us in and hadn't treated him like he was invisible. My request was phrased in such a way that I indicated I knew it wasn't on the menu so he was doing me a kindness, but at the same time it wasn't an outrageous request. But she thought he was helping me because he fancied me. Nope - he just appreciated something that was requested politely.

 

[Tomasso]

And it has always been a test of mine with friends or dates. If I see them treat service people (especially in restaurants) the least bit curtly... well. It's not a good omen.

That's so true.



Reminds me of the......


[video=youtube;xEjRPSWO2i0]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xEjRPSWO2i0&NR=1&feature=fvwp[/video]

 

[Lincsong]

I believe a significant number of factors are at play.New, more potent drugs are certainly an issue, and another contributing factor is the ease with which we can access information. In other words, we are made aware of incidents much more readily now. Something happens in Maine and in minutes, I am aware of it in Arizona.

My personal belief is that we started down this slippery slope with our propensity to try and legislate civility. There was a time in this country when a man could expect to pay a price for insulting a lady. I'm old enough to remember these days. It simply wasn't tolerated and any gentleman in the area would enforce this. Today, should someone insult my wife, and should I administer corrective action; he walks away smiling and I GO TO JAIL! Ridiculous! Kids are being shot in our schools because administrators are afraid to confront the troublemakers, and would rather suspend everyone involved in an altercation than root out the real problem and deal with it. Once upon a time, evil-doers were dealt with, now assailant and victim are treated the same, until something blows. We have somehow come to the conclusion that we can legislate ourselves into civility and we are paying price for our foolishness.

Excellent point. That's the end result of when some insist that every society on the planet is equal and that the primitive societies are just as equal as the developed nations.