The Era -- Day By Day

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

The Case Of The Swallowed Key takes an interesting twist.

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzt!

He enjoys reading The News because THEY DON'T CALL HIM "FAT".

Boy, old Gramp here is lucky Axel is otherwise occupied at the moment...

"Uh, that's fine, but this is a steamship office. Lieutenant, either sell this man a ticket, or usher him off the dock."

This is what happens when you have lax security at the airport.

They don't need air-conditioning in this office, not as long as they've got Snipe's face in panel two.

Yeah, well, don't count on the Invader to be quite so understanding.

You don't wanna go to Hollywood anyway, Gee-Gee's probably about to marry Artie Shaw.

I'm assuming that box is the cake, and I am absolutely shocked he hasn't eaten it yet.

 

[Fading Fast]

... (But two million would buy an awful lot at Sears.)...

"Curtain stretcher?"

Perhaps Sears is feeling some heat from Davega.

... (Joseph Ignatius Breen might not let them use the word "Nazi" in the film title, but they found a way to get it in the ad! Wonder what color shirt he wears?)...

"Carefully cooled?"

Lloyd Nolan, Maria Ouspenskaya and Otto Kruger are all outstanding less-well-known actors.

...The Dodgers have long griped about the Giants' providing a canopy over the home bullpen at the Polo Grounds, but none for the visitors, and a group of Dodger fans from the Lefferts Grill on Flatbush Avenue decided to do something about it -- bringing along a canvas awning from the restaurant to shade the Dodger hurlers from the rays of the August sun....

How'd they get that past the turnstile?

... (If you own a cabin in the woods in 1940, you probably make a pretty good living renting it out to itinerant bands of petty hoods.)...

No kidding, heck, one height-challenged criminal bought outright an entire cabin camp (of course, he then stole the money he used to buy it back, but hey, a criminal's gotta criminal).

And sorry Sparky, but you seem (in the three days or so that we've been reading you) to tell everyone about your cosmic rays, so no, I bet they know about them.

That said, big points for trolling the kidnappers in panel four.

...
(Point of order: that elephant did not belong to Uncle Zip. Tootsie, whereabouts yet unknown, belonged to Uncle Zip. Not-Tootsie belonged to that guy you rented her from, and you can count on not getting your deposit back when he finds out what's going on. All this will eventually come out in court.)...

Tuthill's lost track of the characters in his own story. We might be closer than we think with our musings about his psychedelic indulgences as short-term memory loss is a known side effect.

... (Somewhere a little boy named Francis Gary Powers is reading today's "Dan Dunn" and saying "Gee, that's what I wanna do when I grow up!")

Good connect Lizzie.

Also, did we know about the small bombs?

And, just sayin', what exactly are we paying the Army to do?

... The Case Of The Swallowed Key takes an interesting twist....

Yes it does. Her story gained some credibility today, but man, swallowing the key is some serious devotion to your job as a stewardess.

...
Zzzzzzzzzzzzzt!...

"Good idea young man, but allow me to introduce 'the Duchess' to you and see if you can sell it to her." (Sotto voce: "Good luck with that.")

...
He enjoys reading The News because THEY DON'T CALL HIM "FAT"....

No doubt the Eagle is banned from that home. "I don't want to see that rag in this house ever, EVER!" "Yes dear."

... This is what happens when you have lax security at the airport....

The scale is all over the map, but still, you can feel the Art Deco-ness of the airport.

...
They don't need air-conditioning in this office, not as long as they've got Snipe's face in panel two....

Apparently, it was pattern day at the office and Skeezix didn't see the memo.

 

[LizzieMaine]

I imagine working the turnstiles during a Dodger series is a great trial for the Polo Grounds staff. One reason all those crazy banners and such showed up there when the Mets played at the PG is that all the old Dodger fans were well-experienced in sneaking them in.

I'd like to see a bit of legal analysis of what authorization there is for sending a team of "secret operatives" on an overtly military mission to "observe" activities taking place within a neutral country. Some would call that "espionage," but officially, the US in 1940 didn't even have an "espionage section." *Officially*, that is.

Sparky still seems to be pretty new to this superhero business, and I imagine he lives in a universe where there are no other super-powered types. But certainly they must have comic books he could consult to see how it's supposed to be done? (Incidentally, all those fanboys who complain when spinoff media don't take superheroes seriously enough don't understand that the "campy" angle was already there pretty much from the beginning. Nobody but eight year olds took superheroes seriously in 1940 -- and not even the eight year olds, really...)

A curtain stretcher is a framework you stretch your curtains on while they dry so they don't end up all wrinkly. Assuming you wash your curtains, that is. Mine just sort of hang here turning gray with age, sort of like I do myself.

 

[Fading Fast]

I imagine working the turnstiles during a Dodger series is a great trial for the Polo Grounds staff. One reason all those crazy banners and such showed up there when the Mets played at the PG is that all the old Dodger fans were well-experienced in sneaking them in.

I'd like to see a bit of legal analysis of what authorization there is for sending a team of "secret operatives" on an overtly military mission to "observe" activities taking place within a neutral country. Some would call that "espionage," but officially, the US in 1940 didn't even have an "espionage section." *Officially*, that is.

Sparky still seems to be pretty new to this superhero business, and I imagine he lives in a universe where there are no other super-powered types. But certainly they must have comic books he could consult to see how it's supposed to be done? (Incidentally, all those fanboys who complain when spinoff media don't take superheroes seriously enough don't understand that the "campy" angle was already there pretty much from the beginning. Nobody but eight year olds took superheroes seriously in 1940 -- and not even the eight year olds, really...)

A curtain stretcher is a framework you stretch your curtains on while they dry so they don't end up all wrinkly. Assuming you wash your curtains, that is. Mine just sort of hang here turning gray with age, sort of like I do myself.

But sneaking in an entire awning is still pretty darn impressive.

Irwin as a secret operative on an espionage mission to save the United States is quite a lot to take in (heck, it's a lot to take in even if you think only of Dan on the mission).

Good points on Sparky, but he won the day anyway with this full-on troll.

I have never owned a curtain in my life.

 

[Haversack]

It is interesting to note in these day-by-day newspaper stories hints of the activities of British Security Coordination. (This was the semi-covert organization the British ran to stymy Nazi activities in the Western Hemisphere and to influence the US government and population to side with Britain in the war. It operated out of Rockefeller Center in New York under the direction of William Stephenson). The story the other day about Noel Coward arriving in America to do propaganda work reflects a small portion of BSC's work. Another was the exposure of the Nazi commercial envoy Westrick via planted newspaper stories. The mention today of the confiscation of mail aboard the Excalibur when it docked in Bermuda is yet another hint. The BSC ran a massive mail and cable intercept operation out of the basement of the Princess Hotel in Bermuda.

The benefit of 80 years of hindsight.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Administration leaders today turned a cold shoulder toward talk of a compromise in the Senate debate over the conscription bill. Democratic Floor Leader Sen. Alben W. Barkley argued that conscription and voluntary enlistments could not be linked successfully in such as system as that proposed by Sen. Francis T. Maloney (D-Conn.) as an alternative to the Burke-Wadsworth Conscription Bill. Maloney's plan would require the registration of all men between the ages of 21 and 31, but would delay conscription itself until January 1st, allowing an interval of voluntary enlistment in an effort to meet the Army's quota. If that quota is not met, a draft would then be held. As of July 31st, the Army's strength stood at 270,183, with a goal of 322,922 by the start of 1941.

As the Senate continues its debate on the draft, the Brooklyn Marriage License Bureau saw its busiest day since 1917, with over 500 couples swamping the Brooklyn Municipal Building by 11 this morning, requiring a squad of police patrolmen to keep order. While most of the couples jostling their way to the counter just giggled when asked about their reasons for wanting to get married, one man, Murray Selvin, a "communications specialist" from Hempstead, was frank in his acknowledgement of wanting to get married to beat the draft, and he suggested that the majority of those at the Bureau this morning agreed with that view. "It's very significant that young people don't want the draft," he maintained. "I work in radio and would probably get a good job in the Army, but I'm opposed to conscription."

The Brooklyn Chamber of Commerce has announced its opposition to proposals to rigidly tax the defense industry as a block against wartime profiteering. The Chamber's Federal Taxation Committee today issued a statement claiming that "an arbitrary application of any formula on collecting excess profits taxes would work a hardship on a number of businesses," and called on Congress to consider separating the question of taxation from the amortization of the cost of defense facilities. The statement noted that a "sizable number" of Brooklyn's five thousand factories would be involved in some way with the national defense buildup.

The great British munitions works at Faversham, the Pobjoy aircraft works at Rochester, and government shipyards at Sheerness and Chatham-on-Thames were struck by Nazi bombs today as the German High Command announced a new wave of air raids on Britain. "Great damage" was also reported done to the docks at the English port of Newcastle, and a runway at Bristol airport was said to have been destroyed.

Former Postmaster General James Farley has taken a job as the chairman of the board of the Coca-Cola Export Corporation, and will be in charge of all export business and foreign expansion of the soft drink concern, which operates in seventy-six foreign countries. Farley's position with that company will not interfere with his new duties as President of the New York Yankees baseball club, with his confirmation in the latter job awaiting final approval of the sale of the team by the heirs of Jacob Ruppert to a new combine headed by Farley.

Air stewardess Rosemary Olive Griffith of Flushing issued an angry denial of a story published in a Nashville newspaper that claimed the story that someone slugged her while her American Airlines plane was en route to that city from New York was "a hoax," and that she had admitted as much in a letter written to "a sweetheart with whom she had had a quarrel." Also denying the story was American Airlines co-pilot W. C. Jakeman, reportedly the lover in question. Miss Griffith returned to New York today by air, and was whisked in a taxi past a crowd of reporters who had been awaiting her arrival at LaGuardia Field.

Roman Catholics make up the single largest religious denomination in the United States with 19,914,937 members, according to the 1940 Census. The Census Bureau report identified a total of 256 religious denominations in the country with a total of 55,807,366 members. Approximately half of all Americans belong to a religious organization. Following Catholics come Jewish congregations, totaling 4,641,184 members; Negro Baptists at 3,782,464; the Methodist Episcopal Church at 3,509,763 members; the Southern Baptist Convention at 2,700,155; the Methodist Episcopal Church - Southern at 2,061,863; the Presbyterian Church of the USA at 1,797,727; the Northern Baptist Convention at 1,329,044; the United Lutheran Church of America at 1,286,612; the Disciples of Christ at 1,196,315; the Lutheran Church - Missouri Synod, at 1,192,553; and the Congregational/Christian Church at 976,938. The smallest organized religious body in the US was listed as the Friends (Primitive), with 14 members.

Republican Presidential candidate Wendell Willkie may be whipped into shape soon by Artie McGovern, physical conditioning specialist for the Dodgers. So reports Clifford Evans, who says the candidate needs a conditioner to "keep him in trim" for the election.

Helen Worth is confined to her home with illness. Her column should resume "shortly."

(Well, I dunno 'bout your reading habits there, toots, but if you lean over any further you're going to roll right down this hill.)

Despite anemic support from his teammates, who seem to have forgotten to pack their bats for the trip to Boston, Wasp-Waisted Whit Wyatt threw another gem in Boston yesterday, taking less than two hours to horsecollar the Bees 1-0 for his second consecutive shutout. Babe Phelps brought in the only run of the game with an RBI single in the eighth inning, with the run scored by none other than Wyatt himself, who had opened the inning with a base hit.

Durocher is unsure who will start today's game in Boston. Tex Carleton had previously been announced as the starter, but it's possible Lee "Li'l Abner" Grissom might get the start instead. Manuel Salvo will stand on the mound for Boston and laugh at the Dodgers' futile attempts to hit.

The Bushwicks beat the Black Yankees 6-4 at Dexter Park last night, and face next another powerful Negro American League club, the Memphis Red Sox, in a doubleheader tomorrow. Memphis made short work of the Black Yanks when they met at Yankee Stadium last week, and will furnish formidable opposition.

When Edgar Bergen and Charlie McCarthy return to the air this fall, Charlie's sketches will offer a new twist -- a continuing storyline. Bergen figures a touch of cliff-hanger suspense will give the program a fresh approach, and he's also considering giving Charlie a continuing love interest -- or interests, to be played by live actresses and not by dummies.

(Somebody needs to show Sparky the right way to wear his socks. The sanitary goes under the stirrup, not over it.)

(When threatened, George has the ability to withdraw his head into his neck, just like a big turtle. You'd think, speaking of circuses, that he could figure out a way to monetize this unique ability.)

(SPOT BLACKSTON IN PURPLE SHIRT AT BEACH -- "I Bought It At Davega," Says Candidate.)

(Bad choice for a cover. All the real wealthy oil operators will wonder why he didn't show up at that meeting in Scarsdale.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

And out in Hollywood, John Barrymore seethes. "Windsor!" he hisses. "That punk! What's he got that I haven't got?"

And in a lonely hotel room, George Magerkurth reads the News as a single tear trickles slowly down his florid cheek.

Bim Gump, Father Of The Revolution.

Watch out for the third rail!

This chase is oddly unsatisfying. Better he should be attacked and torn limb from limb by a horde of hypnotized clubwomen he finds he can no longer control.

Getting a bit territorial, are we there, Snipe? Miss Glip has done nothing especially hussy-like in the few days we've known her.

Has anybody given any thought as to how you're going to get away after you do whatever it is you're supposed to accomplish here?

OK, now, wouldn't the reasonable thing be for the newsie to say "HEY SHORTY, HERE'S THE GUY YOU BEEN LOOKIN' FOR!" Except the newsie seems to have conveniently abandoned his post. Probably he's gone to find a cop to complain about some gink leaving banana skins around his corner.

Moon is the regular fashion plate of the funny pages, but let's give a big hand to Mamie today for her snazzy strappy-sandals and black wool stockings combination.

 

[Fading Fast]

...Former Postmaster General James Farley has taken a job as the chairman of the board of the Coca-Cola Export Corporation, and will be in charge of all export business and foreign expansion of the soft drink concern, which operates in seventy-six foreign countries. Farley's position with that company will not interfere with his new duties as President of the New York Yankees baseball club, with his confirmation in the latter job awaiting final approval of the sale of the team by the heirs of Jacob Ruppert to a new combine headed by Farley....

While Coca-Cola wouldn't have been my second choice, President of the Yankees and Chairman of the board of the Coca-Cola Export Corp is not a bad combo. You could do worse in life than to get free Yankee tickets and free Coca-Colas. Since he seems to have room to do many things, maybe Childs could hire him as a marketing advisor.

....Wasp-Waisted Whit Wyatt....

"%$#*&! -" FFF

...When Edgar Bergen and Charlie McCarthy return to the air this fall, Charlie's sketches will offer a new twist -- a continuing storyline. Bergen figures a touch of cliff-hanger suspense will give the program a fresh approach, and he's also considering giving Charlie a continuing love interest -- or interests, to be played by live actresses and not by dummies....

Just remember to keep your elephants straight.

...[ (Somebody needs to show Sparky the right way to wear his socks. The sanitary goes under the stirrup, not over it.)...

Yes, that looks odd. But I'll forgive it as Rogers opened his strip with an attempt at the very difficult double troll. Would have been better if he hadn't let us in on it in the middle, but "Sparky Watts" is coming out of the gate running hard.

... (When threatened, George has the ability to withdraw his head into his neck, just like a big turtle. You'd think, speaking of circuses, that he could figure out a way to monetize this unique ability.)...

Fanetta (really?) should do a crossover with "The Gumps" just so that she can have a conversation with the new Mrs. Jones - maybe they'd understand each other's English.

... (Bad choice for a cover. All the real wealthy oil operators will wonder why he didn't show up at that meeting in Scarsdale.)

Also Matzan seems like a bit lazy fictionalization of Mazatlán.

... And out in Hollywood, John Barrymore seethes. "Windsor!" he hisses. "That punk! What's he got that I haven't got?"...

Re The Duke and Dutches: Their country is on the brink of invasions and all these two self-absorbed idiots can do is talk about sightseeing in NYC. I believe evidence has come out since that they held out hope that, had the Nazis defeated England, they would return him to the throne. Could they be that venal, in a word, yes.

Re The Neighbors: As if you needed another reason not to buy a young boy white shoes.

...
Bim Gump, Father Of The Revolution.....

Basically, it's the "tax as fairness vs. the tax as stealing" argument writ small.

... Watch out for the third rail!....

They invented the luggage cart, but with those roller-skate wheels, unless they have them spinning around freely, it's going to be a bear to handle.

... This chase is oddly unsatisfying. Better he should be attacked and torn limb from limb by a horde of hypnotized clubwomen he finds he can no longer control.....

Agreed. I also thought there'd be a lot more to the story before Tracy caught him: further scams, close escapes, an exposing of the nose cones (Tracy uses his own set to catch Yosee in the act), etc.

... Getting a bit territorial, are we there, Snipe? Miss Glip has done nothing especially hussy-like in the few days we've known her.....

Agreed again. Holy Cow, she decided to fire the howitzer just before going on vacation.

Also, classic '30s/'40s luggage except don't the stripes usually go up and down not across?

... Has anybody given any thought as to how you're going to get away after you do whatever it is you're supposed to accomplish here?...

Not just saying it, I was thinking the same thing yesterday as I'm sure they've impounded Raven's boat.

That said, right now, I'm impressed with Hu Shee. And since she's planned this out brilliantly so far, maybe she's got an exit strategy as well.

Also, today's comment about the transmitter (gun hung) could be part of an escape plan by Pat.

... View attachment 253039 OK, now, wouldn't the reasonable thing be for the newsie to say "HEY SHORTY, HERE'S THE GUY YOU BEEN LOOKIN' FOR!" Except the newsie seems to have conveniently abandoned his post. Probably he's gone to find a cop to complain about some gink leaving banana skins around his corner....

Coordinating with the news guy has been clear solution all along, but I guess these guys aren't the brightest bulbs. That said, this joke is now over - Carl Ed's got to have them meet or not, but the near misses have worn out their welcome.

 

[LizzieMaine]

You be the judge.

And speaking of which, I wonder, if after Professor Artie McGovern gets done with him, if we'll be reading about "Wasp-Waisted Wendell Willkie."

Never mind the unlikelihood of Shadow tracking down Harold in a city of seven million people, all Harold needed to do is ask the newsie for a description of who it was that had been asking about the Covina paper, and he'd instantly know who it was. WAKE UP KID AND SMELL THE BANANA SKINS.

(Oh and somebody should tell Leo his fly is open.)

 

[Fading Fast]

View attachment 253068
You be the judge.

And speaking of which, I wonder, if after Professor Artie McGovern gets done with him, if we'll be reading about "Wasp-Waisted Wendell Willkie."

Never mind the unlikelihood of Shadow tracking down Harold in a city of seven million people, all Harold needed to do is ask the newsie for a description of who it was that had been asking about the Covina paper, and he'd instantly know who it was. WAKE UP KID AND SMELL THE BANANA SKINS.

(Oh and somebody should tell Leo his fly is open.)

Freddie's a stocky guy, but "fat," sincerely, doesn't seem right and Whit is no wasp-waisted anything.

From Leo's days running around with Sinatra, he found it was easier to keep it that way. And I'm only half kidding - those guys were hounds and if they couldn't coax it, they bought it with not an ounce of shame.

 

[LizzieMaine]

A call to send the question of conscription to a public referendum was sounded yesterday by Senator Burton K. Wheeler (D-Montana), a leader of the Senate opposition to the Burke-Wadsworth conscription bill. "If the proponents of conscription feel that it is necessary to have the draft to save democracy, as they have repeatedly said," said Sen. Wheeler, "they ought to be willing to submit the question to the people, because that would be the democratic way to ascertain the public viewpoint." Wheeler acknowledged that there would be "practical difficulties" in conducting such a vote, but he believes they should not be insurmountable.

Although bombing raids continued to strike across Britain with renewed ferocity, British military men are expressing the belief that the threat of a blitzkrieg invasion by Germany is dwindling by the day toward a vanishing point at the end of September. British experts declared their belief that the continued bombing by Nazi planes amount to "terror raids," rather than acting as the vanguard of a coming invasion.

The nation's First Army maneuvers now underway near the upstate town of Ogdensburg have developed into a regular "Alice In Wonderland" situation, as the spectacle of troops training without adequate equipment leaves experienced officers shaking their heads. Gas-pipe howitzers and explosions created by bags of flour dropped from airplanes give a peculiar flavor to the proceedings.

The honeymoon isn't yet over for the Duke and Duchess of Windsor, who landed at Pier F in Jersey City yesterday aboard the liner Excalibur. Stewards aboard the liner report that the Windsors call each other "darling" and "dear," and that they share a taste for the color pink -- sleeping on pink linen, with the Duke in pink pajamas that match the Duchess's pink nightgown. The Windsors are, however, stingy with tips. One steward reported that the Duke tipped him $30, and his assistant got $10. "We usually get twice that," he grumbled, "when ordinary people occupy those rooms."

Yesterday's conscription-fueled surge in applications for marriage licenses yielded a city-wide total of nearly a thousand, with half of those in Brooklyn. Deputy City Clerk James B. Allen of Brooklyn set a new record by performing fifty-six marriage ceremonies in less than three hours. Probate Judge Nelson Brewer, observing the proceedings at the Municipal Building shook his head and warned of a similar crowd in divorce court once the present panic is over. "It is a most unpatriotic display," grumbled the Judge.

Air hostess Rosemary Olive Griffith spoke to reporters at her home yesterday, but the details of exactly what happened to her aboard that American Airlines flight from New York to Nashville remain unclear. The 24-year-old stewardess continues to insist that she was struck from behind by a man she didn't know after he cornered her and demanded the key to the airliner's baggage compartment. She also insists that she swallowed that key on purpose to keep the man from getting it, stating that she got the idea from something she once saw in a pirate movie. "I had to swallow my gum to keep it down," Miss Griffith added.

"Hot Potato" Hamlin, king of National League home-run pitchers, threw up another fat one yesterday and Chet Ross made a grand slam of it to propel the Bees to a 4-3 victory over the Dodgers in Boston. Lee Grissom was going along just fine with a 3-0 lead until he allowed three consecutive singles to load the bases in the bottom of the sixth. Durocher pulled him in favor of Hamlin, figuring that Ross, who had a 1 for 23 streak going, having struck out in his last five at-bats, was no longball threat. Ross, however, had other ideas and took advantage of Lonesome Luke's famous speciality to break up the game. The Dodgers were optimisitc up to that point in the contest -- with Dolph Camilli having hit the first Dodger home run at National League Field in at least four years with a dramatic fly deep into the right field "Jury Box" -- but all that went up the flue with Hamlin's gopher ball.

The Dodgers and Bees play two today, with a delegation of Brooklyn fans having made the run to Boston by train to witness the festivities.

("Hah!" says Joe. "Buncha saps!" "Less go to th' Fair again," says Sally.)

The longest winning streak in sports continued yesterday with Queen Alice Marble, first lady of tennis, winning the Eastern Grass Court title in sensational style. When the busy blonde beat off Helen Jacobs 6-1, 6-0 at the Westchester Country Club, it marked the 97th consecutive match won by Miss Marble since 1938 without a defeat.

The proposed purchase of the Dodgers by fight promoter Mike Jacobs remains on the table, despite a general sense that it isn't going to happen. Mrs. Edward McKeever, owner of a 25 percent interest in the club, has stated that her shares are for sale, and the Brooklyn Trust Company, which controls the Ebbets family shares, has said that the estate is willing to sell at any time "if it can." But Mrs. James Mulvey, daughter of the late Stephen McKeever, and owner of the remaining twenty five percent, is adamant that she won't sell, and Jacobs has made it clear that his purchase must be an all-or-nothing proposition. But an even greater obstacle may be the longstanding court battle between the Ebbets and McKeever families over club finances, with the Ebbets faction having accused the McKeevers of mismanagement and needless expenditures in a lawsuit dating back to 1930, a case which has developed into one of the bitterest Surrogate Court battles the borough has ever seen. That situation must be resolved before any stock in the club can change hands. The Ebbetes and the McKeevers have been at each other's throats since the death of both Charles Ebbets and Ed McKeever in 1925. The split in ownership dates back to 1912, when Ebbets had been forced to sell a half interest in the team to the McKeever brothers in order to finance the construction of Ebbets Field.

Old Timer H. K. remembers back when he quit school in 1877, students were obligated to buy their own textbooks, and that there wasn't a single public high school in all of Brooklyn. He's very glad that children today are spared this humiliation.

On the front of the Trend section this week, we find the Senate's most vociferous opponent of the draft -- a man born to political nonconformity.

After 2847 performances, Jeeter Lester will eat his last turnip. "Tobacco Road" will close this week, ending its run at the Forrest Theatre after nearly seven years on Broadway.

Actor Alan Hale has a profitable sideline -- if his Hollywood career ever falters, he's got plenty of ideas for clever inventions. He recently patented a new kind of theatre seat that moves back and forth on rails, making it easier for patrons to move between rows with forcing other spectators to stand up, and he's currently working on an all-new process for making greaseless potato chips.

(In the Red Ryder universe, there's one thing you can count on: all sheriffs are evil. Who says the funnies aren't educational.)

(Eleanor's horse doesn't look too happy about it. Probably a Liberty Leaguer.)

(And please welcome our special guest star today, the late Mr. Robert Woolsey.)

(FACE EATING DOG ACTION!)

(We all have our little rituals to get us thru life's dull moments...)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Somebody get on the ball and make a movie about this churchly organ-playing murderess.

Hey, leave the comics out of this. Well, OK, maybe Gould is depraved and frustrated, but leave the rest of 'em out of it.

Bridge? Phooey. Now, Gin Rummy, that's a game....

Ahhhh, now THAT'S MORE LIKE IT.

Kindly Sam IS Nick Gatt, CONFIRMED.

Sparky Watts is outside, and he's sore that you're muscling in on his racket.

Best Sunday page EVER. "Enjoy your cheese, you rat!"

Wait, what? Shadow is short like Mickey Rooney, has a nose like Jimmy Durante, has buck teeth like Milton Berle, and is losing his hair like Jack Benny, but his ears? Perfectly conventional.

Thanks a lot, kid. Where'd you get that dinky umbrella, out of a drink?

Please make this parrot a regular.

 

[Fading Fast]

...Although bombing raids continued to strike across Britain with renewed ferocity, British military men are expressing the belief that the threat of a blitzkrieg invasion by Germany is dwindling by the day toward a vanishing point at the end of September. British experts declared their belief that the continued bombing by Nazi planes amount to "terror raids," rather than acting as the vanguard of a coming invasion....

Interesting to see this view as it was, what, all of a week or so ago that the invasion was considered all but a given.

.... Gas-pipe howitzers and explosions created by bags of flour dropped from airplanes give a peculiar flavor to the proceedings....

Umm, guys, we could use that flour today.

...The honeymoon isn't yet over for the Duke and Duchess of Windsor, who landed at Pier F in Jersey City yesterday aboard the liner Excalibur. Stewards aboard the liner report that the Windsors call each other "darling" and "dear," and that they share a taste for the color pink -- sleeping on pink linen, with the Duke in pink pajamas that match the Duchess's pink nightgown. The Windsors are, however, stingy with tips. One steward reported that the Duke tipped him $30, and his assistant got $10. "We usually get twice that," he grumbled, "when ordinary people occupy those rooms."...

On big or small issues, there is nothing to like about these two.

...Air hostess Rosemary Olive Griffith spoke to reporters at her home yesterday, but the details of exactly what happened to her aboard that American Airlines flight from New York to Nashville remain unclear. The 24-year-old stewardess continues to insist that she was struck from behind by a man she didn't know after he cornered her and demanded the key to the airliner's baggage compartment. She also insists that she swallowed that key on purpose to keep the man from getting it, stating that she got the idea from something she once saw in a pirate movie. "I had to swallow my gum to keep it down," Miss Griffith added....

I'm glad they've stayed with this story and I want to believe the "air hostess," (when did "stewardess" come into use?), but I'm still a tiny bit suspicious that there isn't something more here than she's telling.

...("Hah!" says Joe. "Buncha saps!" "Less go to th' Fair again," says Sally.)...

Good for Sally and Joe - once bitten twice shy. Also, darn it, we have to beat teams like the Bees.

...The longest winning streak in sports continued yesterday with Queen Alice Marble, first lady of tennis, winning the Eastern Grass Court title in sensational style. When the busy blonde beat off Helen Jacobs 6-1, 6-0 at the Westchester Country Club, it marked the 97th consecutive match won by Miss Marble since 1938 without a defeat....

Alice in winning form:

... Somebody get on the ball and make a movie about this churchly organ-playing murderess.....

No kidding, one of the better stories we've read in a long time and I can't think of a movie that really riffs on it.

The union president embezzling story, sadly, is the opposite - it happens all the time.

...
Hey, leave the comics out of this. Well, OK, maybe Gould is depraved and frustrated, but leave the rest of 'em out of it....

She's probably the only person on earth enjoying the new "Little Orphan Annie" storyline.

... Kindly Sam IS Nick Gatt, CONFIRMED....

First, Re W.G. Jabara, QED.

Second, Re Nick as Sam, God let's hope so.

... Best Sunday page EVER. "Enjoy your cheese, you rat!"...

T&TP is on fire. Hu Shee takes this guy apart a second time. She's cooler than Raven. Also, it seems Pat might have an escape plan.

... Wait, what? Shadow is short like Mickey Rooney, has a nose like Jimmy Durante, has buck teeth like Milton Berle, and is losing his hair like Jack Benny, but his ears? Perfectly conventional.....

There is a subset of both sexes that have some peculiar tastes.

... Thanks a lot, kid. Where'd you get that dinky umbrella, out of a drink?....

This is what happens if you don't have a fresh idea, but still need to deliver to your editor a Sunday strip.




Also, no "Sparky Watts" today - no room for him to muscle into Sunday's comic-strip real estate? I miss the guy and his crazy cosmic rays.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Sparky doesn't have a Sunday page yet, but if/when one shows up we'll certainly add it. As you have discovered, he had a pretty substantial presence in comic books as the 40s wore on, so the feature seems to have staying power.

Doctor Static looks disturbingly like Larry Fine of the Three Stooges. An odd choice for a model.

I have a pretty good idea who the prisoner Hu Shee and company are out to free has to be -- hello, Dragon Lady -- but I'd be satisfied if Hu Shee herself sticks around a while. And if she doesn't end up killing this bootlicking Invader puppet, Connie most certainly will.

Meanwhile, I imagine April and that Crispin guy must be married with a kid or two by now.

Alice Marble is one of my favorite forgotten women of the Era. Tennis champion, assistant editor of the Wonder Woman comic book, crusader against segregation, and OSS super-spy. Where's her movie?

 

[Fading Fast]

Sparky doesn't have a Sunday page yet, but if/when one shows up we'll certainly add it. As you have discovered, he had a pretty substantial presence in comic books as the 40s wore on, so the feature seems to have staying power.

Doctor Static looks disturbingly like Larry Fine of the Three Stooges. An odd choice for a model.

I have a pretty good idea who the prisoner Hu Shee and company are out to free has to be -- hello, Dragon Lady -- but I'd be satisfied if Hu Shee herself sticks around a while. And if she doesn't end up killing this bootlicking Invader puppet, Connie most certainly will.

Meanwhile, I imagine April and that Crispin guy must be married with a kid or two by now.

Alice Marble is one of my favorite forgotten women of the Era. Tennis champion, assistant editor of the Wonder Woman comic book, crusader against segregation, and OSS super-spy. Where's her movie?

I only discovered Sparky's comic books when I went looking today for an image of him to post with my comment. But as you said, it argues he had some sort of career. Odd, just from the images I saw, it seems baseball didn't stay a big part of his story.

April is a good character, but she's not made of the hearty stuff that Raven, Hu Shee and Pat are - hence, she's gotta sit a few missions out. Also, she needs to have a marriage to some regular Joe (not creepy Crispin) for five or ten years, then, after she gets divorced and is single for several years, Pat should be about ready to settle down. Thus, when those two accidentally meet (at Raffles in Singapore) after being apart for half a decade or more - well, they should both be ready then.

I'm not just glomming on to your comment, when I read Alice's Wikipedia page, I thought there was a fantastic book and, then, movie waiting to be written.

 

[LizzieMaine]

Missing-persons specialists and Nassau County police are investigating the disappearance of an airplane-company executive who has not been seen for three days. Thirty-eight-year-old Bert M. Harvey, a personnel executive for the Fairchild Engine and Aircraft Company of Farmingdale was last seen on Friday afternoon, when he left the plant complaining of noise from engine testing. Harvey was reported to have gone to lunch at a nearby German restaurant, but did not to return to his office after, nor did he return to his home in Lynbrook. His wife reported him missing on Saturday. Police are considering the possibility of foul play related to the fact that part of Harvey's job involved the denial of employment at the plant to aliens. Company officials say Harvey was careful to reject all job applications from persons of foreign birth who had not obtained citizenship papers, and that he refused to permit any German person entry to the factory grounds.

The only serving senator who voted against the United States' entry into the World War in 1917 will oppose the conscription bill, claiming that the measure would "lead the nation into the realm of dictatorship. Senator George W. Norris (I-Nebraska) argued in Senate debate over the measure that "if the spirit of militarism becomes dominant in the United States, the nation must reconcile itself to losing its freedom."

British fighters roaring out over the English Channel today prevented all but 55 of 200 German planes from reaching an unnamed southern port. RAF fighters sent four Messerschmitts spinning into the sea, as British fliers broke up the Nazi formations and turned dozens of planes back.

Nazi business agent Dr. Gerhard Alois Westrick has left New York for an undisclosed destination after the state Department of Motor Vehicles revoked his driver's license and automobile registrations for lying on his applications for those documents. The German Embassy in Washington today refused to reveal Dr. Westrick's current whereabouts. The personal envoy to American business of Adolf Hitler had conferred recently with American oil company executives at a rented estate in Scarsdale.

The names of retired Brooklyn gangster Augie Pisano and Jimmy Kelly, well-known Brooklyn nightclub operator were read off today among the potential witnesses to be called in the trial of former labor executive George Scalise. Scalise will be tried on a 60-count indictment charging that he embezzled a total of $60,000 in union funds from the Building Service Employees International Union while serving as that organization's president.

The president of the Brooklyn Trust Company today issued a statement denying that the bank directly approached fight promoter Mike Jacobs about purchasing the Brooklyn Dodgers. George V. McLaughlin emphasized that the bank did not offer to sell Jacobs or anyone else any stock in the team, since the bank owns no stock to sell. McLaughlin stressed that the bank merely acts as trustee for the half-interest in the club owned by the Ebbets family, and that on that basis, the bank would naturally be interested in speaking with anyone with an interest in buying those shares -- but it is in no way actively seeking a purchaser. McLaughlin acknowledged that the bank has spoken with Jacobs, and that the promoter mentioned the names of "two highly respected and financially responsible individuals" willing to finance a purchase, but stated that no price has been proposed.

Shoppers at Loeser's Department Store will soon notice improvements designed to make the store more convenient and beautiful. Loeser's president Joseph F. Pridday announced today that a new and modern florescent lighting system will be installed, along with frosted-glass signs guiding shoppers to the store's various departments. A new soda fountain and luncheonette will open on the main floor, along with a large bakery department. All of the apparel departments on the second floor will be renovated, with the addition of new bridal and maternity departments.

This week at the AIR COOLED Patio, it's Dorothy Lamour and Robert Preston in "Typhoon," paired with Wallace Beery in "Twenty Mule Team."

The Gay Nineties ambience of Gage and Tollner's restaurant at 374 Fulton Street will not be disturbed by the addition of a new air-conditioning plant. Diners will be served in cool comfort on the same red-velved carpets by the same service-striped waiters, amidst the same Mauve Era decor as always.

This week is Farm Week at the World's Fair, and rural hi-jinks will be in evidence all over the grounds. The Court of Peace has been strewn with hay for square-dancing, and will host a monster moonlight dance on Friday. Major farm organizations including the Grange and 4-H will offer presentations thruout the week, and livestock and farm produce will be available at a special barter market where fair guests may dicker with actual farmers for their purchases.

(Wars may come and wars may go, but there'll always be fish cakes and spaghetti on Friday at H&H.)

In Hull, Massachusetts, a man who mistook a floating beer keg for his wife is in hot water. The man, whose name was mercifully not revealed, summoned lifeguards after spotting the keg in the water off Nantasket Beach, and demanded they rescue his wife. When she appeared from another part of the beach, he realized his error. The fate of the keg was not disclosed.

(Joe and Sally look at each other, and though they exchange not a word, the looks say it all.)

Bandleader Jack Teagarden says Brooklyn's the breeding ground for the finest musicians in the country, and he ought to know since he hires as many of them as he can. Four Brooklyn boys now play in the Teagarden swing ensemble, and vocalist Marianne Dunn says they're all fine gentlemen.

(The divorce rate in 1940 stands at 20 percent, and is rising. Be prepared.)

The Boston Bees play in a big, wind-swept park -- and every time the Dodgers blow into town, those breezes blow the bats right out of their hands, with ineffectual hitting contributing to yesterday's doubleheader split. The Flock fell in game one by a score of 3-2, before rebounding to a 3-0 shutout on strong pitching by Vito Tamulis in the nightcap. The wind didn't benefit the Bostons either, with only sixteen hits total for the two clubs across both games of the twinbill. The Boston series thus concludes with an even split, and the Dodgers return to Ebbets Field for a short homestand no better off than when they last left.

Whit Wyatt will open the homestand tomorrow, as the Dodgers hope to fatten up a bit against the woebegone Phillies. Three games against Philadelphia will be followed by a series against the Bees before the Flock heads out for its final western tour of the season.

As a preliminary to this week's final night game of the season at Ebbets Field, Pee Wee Reese will attempt to break the world speed record for circling the bases. An A. A. U. timekeeper will keep track as the fleet-footed rookie tries to smash the mark of 13.25 seconds set in 1929 by Cincinnati outfielder Evar Swanson.

Bobby Riggs may clown it up on the courts when it suits him, but when the chips are down he's all business, as the Chicago tennis star with the Charlie Chaplin feet retained his number 1 position at the Westchester Country Club, blasting to his fourth straight Eastern Grass Court championship by defeating No. 3 ranked Don McNeill 6-2, 3-6, 7-5, 6-4.

(Wouldn't this fracture every bone in the catcher's body? Superhero physics always baffled me.)

(Real-Tootsie has long since blown home, and Zip is here to congratulate these two bozos for taking such good care of her.)

("OK, I do have a pair of purple SHORTS. But that's not the same thing! Is it?")

(Yes, the Fat Man *IS* boss! He's what, 11-2 on the season now?)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Oh, and by the way, he went to a GERMAN RESTAURANT. You know, where you might reasonably expect to meet GERMANS.

"Yeah, don't get any ideas, fresh guy. I ain't THAT green!"

The Time Traveling Hipster gets a job as chef at Childs.

Kindly Sam is a master manipulator.

"Gone?"

You'd think with all his network of informants that Bim would know what's going on and perhaps rethink his strategy.

Spectacular.

Oh put your tongue back in your mouth, grandpa.

Panel One Mamie looks exactly like my seventh-grade English teacher.

AT LAST!

 

[Fading Fast]

...
(Wars may come and wars may go, but there'll always be fish cakes and spaghetti on Friday at H&H.)...

Well, it was just yesterday that we learned that Roman Catholics make up the single largest religious denomination in the United States and we know Brooklyn has its share, so H&H is just smartly meeting market demand.

I'm intrigued by the off-season iced ginger cake (chocolate icing on a ginger cake sounds like an odd flavor combo to me, but I'll give the vanilla-iced one a shot).

And heck, H&H is probably just trying to get out in front of the new luncheonette and "large" bakery-department competition at Loeser's.

...In Hull, Massachusetts, a man who mistook a floating beer keg for his wife is in hot water. The man, whose name was mercifully not revealed, summoned lifeguards after spotting the keg in the water off Nantasket Beach, and demanded they rescue his wife. When she appeared from another part of the beach, he realized his error. The fate of the keg was not disclosed.

(Joe and Sally look at each other, and though they exchange not a word, the looks say it all.)...

Please just tell us it's not Sugarfoot as he's already in enough trouble with Estelle.

...The Boston Bees play in a big, wind-swept park -- and every time the Dodgers blow into town, those breezes blow the bats right out of their hands, with ineffectual hitting contributing to yesterday's doubleheader split. The Flock fell in game one by a score of 3-2, before rebounding to a 3-0 shutout on strong pitching by Vito Tamulis in the nightcap. The wind didn't benefit the Bostons either, with only sixteen hits total for the two clubs across both games of the twinbill. The Boston series thus concludes with an even split, and the Dodgers return to Ebbets Field for a short homestand no better off than when they last left.

View attachment 253414
Whit Wyatt will open the homestand tomorrow, as the Dodgers hope to fatten up a bit against the woebegone Phillies. Three games against Philadelphia will be followed by a series against the Bees before the Flock heads out for its final western tour of the season....

Time is not the Dodgers ally if they keep losing to / splitting with mediocre teams.

Freddie Fitzsimmons' radar lit up on the "fatten up" comment, but seeing he wasn't mentioned, he ordered the fighter plane to stand down. If you were close enough though, you could hear him mutter sarcastically, "what, stupid Wyatt isn't 'wasp-waisted' anymore, heh."

... (Real-Tootsie has long since blown home, and Zip is here to congratulate these two bozos for taking such good care of her.)...

I'm hoping it's Tootsie at the door to announce that he's returned home, but in truth, I think Tuthill has forgotten that his story has two elephants and that Tootsie's still missing.

And in an emergency, couldn't we put Sugarfoot in an elephant costume to fool Uncle Zip - Sugar's not looking too slim right now.

... ("OK, I do have a pair of purple SHORTS. But that's not the same thing! Is it?")...

John should just be glad he's not mentioned in Mary Astor's Purple Diary as Leona would never forgive him for that:

Mary Astor's Purple Diary: The Great American Sex Scandal of 1936 https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/28789689-mary-astor-s-purple-diary

Although, if a scandal's going to kill your career and marriage, much better it's for banging Mary Astor than cuddling up to fascists.

.... (Yes, the Fat Man *IS* boss! He's what, 11-2 on the season now?)

Well Lizzie, if the Dodgers rally to make the playoffs, you just blew your chance at any of FFF's complimentary tickets.

... Oh, and by the way, he went to a GERMAN RESTAURANT. You know, where you might reasonably expect to meet GERMANS....

I noticed that little suspicious detail in the Eagle's story too. But to be fair, German restaurants were much more common back then.

...
"Yeah, don't get any ideas, fresh guy. I ain't THAT green!"...

I've been saying it for awhile, but H&H's talking pie is just one big double entendre and now H&H is taking it a step further: Note that the pie is no longer an actual pie with a mouth, but a woman, and the text - "taste the tang -" isn't subtle either.

...
The Time Traveling Hipster gets a job as chef at Childs....

Addled Childs marketing can't compete with the prurience of a talking pie. Hire the darn marketing person away from H&H and watch him sex-up your much beloved muffin.

... Kindly Sam is a master manipulator....

God let's hope so as I don't think I can take one more day of this Hallmark cr*p. Heck, I'm so desperate, I want the candy lady to move into town and open up shop - drugs, numbers, a stupid dress-stealing crime ring, something!

... "Gone?"...

Tracy's gonna need his own set of nose cones to bring this guy down.

... Spectacular....

Yes, fantastic.

... Oh put your tongue back in your mouth, grandpa....

When he passed on Ms. Efficiency and then hired Ms. Hottie, you knew a MeToo moment was coming.

 

[LizzieMaine]

A German blitzkrieg invasion of Britain is feared within seventy-two hours, as an estimated six hundred Nazi bombers pounded two hundred miles of the Channel coast today. British military authorities and neutral observers in Switzerland were in agreement that the attack most likely means that the long-anticipated invasion is imminent. At least thirty-one Nazi planes were reported shot down by British fighters and anti-aircraft batteries, at least five of them on the southeast coast. Today's attack marked the third consecutive day of the German "power assault" on the British coast.

Meanwhile, British planes struck in reprisal at German targets, pounding at objectives from Jutland to the Bay of Biscay.

Army Brigadier General William E. Shedd today told the House Military Committee that even with a high-powered advertising campaign and higher pay, the Army could not meet its needs for manpower thru voluntary enlistments alone. The General also declared that the proposed one-year enlistment program would be insufficient for National Defense needs, arguing that more than a single year is needed to properly train recruits. The General's remarks came even as Republican Senator Robert A. Taft, an opponent of the pending conscription bill, proposed a permanent "special system of voluntary military training" as an alternative to conscription.

Kings County Judge Franklin Taylor went off on a tirade today against "women bar hogs" following a ruling in a morals case involving six men charged with picking up a sixteen-year-old girl in a bar. Judge Taylor placed the defendants on probation, and then railed against women who "guzzle in bars" to the extent that "respectable men" are afraid to enter a saloon. "All hours of the day and night," blazed the Judge, "women can be found occupying the best places at bars," while "spilling beer and booze on expensive evening gowns." Judge Taylor ended his tirade with a call for a return to the pre-Prohibition days when women were forbidden by law from entering saloons, and demanded the repeal of that portion of the Alcoholic Beverage Control, or "ABC Law" which overturned that restriction.

(By the way, the proposed conscription bill gives no special exemption to married men.)

Nassau County police today continued their search for missing aircraft-company executive Bert M. Harvey of Lynbrook, missing since Friday afternoon. Airplanes have been dispatched to help search the woods in Nassau and Suffolk. Meanwhile, local authorities are dismissive of theories suggesting Harvey was abducted by German spies or saboteurs, and have so advised agents of the Federal Bureau of Investigation who have taken an interest in the case.

Borough President John Cashmore has made a personal donation to the committee making preparations for Fred Fitzsimmons Night at Ebbets Field this Friday. Contributions will be used to purchase an appropriate gift for the rotund righthander who is 11-2 for the Dodgers this season. Mayor LaGuardia will preside over the pregame ceremonies and will formally present the 39-year-old pitcher-coach with gifts donated by Dodger fans from all over the country.

The Flatbush Theatre, which ran a well-received vaudeville-and-picture policy last winter, is trying the legitimate stage this summer, presenting a new production of Claire Boothe's Broadway hit of a couple years back, "Kiss The Boys Goodbye," a rollicking assault on the various deficiencies of movie moguls, professional Southerners, news commentators, pseudo-intellectuals, and the highly-veneered suburban smart set. The new stage policy is expected to continue for the balance of the summer season, with vaudeville due to resume in the fall.

The long-simmering controversy between Mayor LaGuardia and the city's two largest milk distributors appears to be over, with Sheffield Farms Company and the Borden Company having sent the Mayor checks totaling $91,120 to be distributed to farmers. The Mayor last September accused the milk firms of conspiring to undercut by six and a half cents per hundredweight the price to farmers that had been agreed upon following the resolution of the 1939 milk strike. The money paid by the companies to the Mayor represents the difference between the two prices, and will be apportioned to affected farmers by the Federal Market Administrator for New York.

Miss A. writes to Helen Worth asking her to settle a point of etiquette. She argues that it's inappropriate for a young girl to give birthday and Christmas gifts to a young man unless they are formally engaged. But her friend Miss B disputes this, saying that if she feels like giving presents to her boyfriend it's nobody's business but hers. Helen agrees with Miss B, telling Miss A that there was a time when her view was the accepted one, but that time has long since passed. Times change, says Helen, and customs must change with them.

("That Johnny Bath Beach!" snorts Joe. "Whatta mug he is! I seen him around! If I ever get a chance, I'm gonna..." "Walk as fast as ya can in th' otha direction," says Sally. "Rememba, you ain't got no life insurance.")

(Times change, says Helen Worth, and customs must change with them.)

The chairman of the board of the Texas Company has stepped down following revelations of his relationship with Nazi business envoy Dr. Gerhard Alois Westrick. Captain Torkild Rieber today quit his $100,000 per year job as head of Texaco, a resignation accepted by the company's Board of Directors "with real regret." A press release issued from company headquarters stated that "under existing circumstances it seemed advisable to accept the resignation." Rieber insisted that his friendship with Westrick had no political significance, stemming merely from Westrick's position as Texaco's legal representative in Germany. Rieber further stated that the company has not had any "permanent investment" in Germany in twenty years, and that it had not sold "a single barrel of oil" to Germany since the beginning of the war.

Dr. J. T. Prothro, the energetic dentist who manages the Philadelphia Phillies, recently acknowledged that the Phils are officially out of the 1940 National League pennant race. But that doesn't mean that Doc's boys can't make trouble for the Dodgers, as they move into Ebbets Field today to open a three game series. The Phils may be in the cellar, but they have a couple of fine pitchers in Hugh Mulcahy and Kirby Higbe, and given the anemic bat-flailing displayed lately by the Flock, the Brooklyns will need everything they can muster to win these games. Whit Wyatt, the best the Dodgers have on this year's mound staff, will take the hill today in quest of his fifth straight shutout, while the Phils are expected to send out Ike Pearson.

The schedule helped the Dodgers pick up half a game on the Reds yesterday, with Brooklyn idle and Cincinnati dropping their game with Pittsburgh, 4-2.

Along with the celebrations in honor of Fat Freddie Fitzsimmons this coming Friday night, and along with Pee Wee Reese's attempt to break the speed record for circling the bases, the Dodgers and Boston Bees will send their senior staffs out to the field to compete in what figures to be a spectacular pre-game relay race. Leo Durocher and coaches Chuck Dressen and Van Mungo will run for Brooklyn, while Casey Stengel and coaches Johnny Cooney and George Kelly will run for the Bees. It figures to be quite an evening.

The Football Dodgers opened their training camp today at Princeton, New Jersey, and new coach Jock Sutherland looked upon his team and called it "the best looking squad of football players" he's ever seen. Thirty-three men have reported to camp so far, with four regulars and six rookies missing. Those players are expected to report once they have concluded their participation at special All-Star camps.

"Information Please," radio's popular stump-the-panel quiz, will move to Friday nights when it gains a new cigarette sponsor to replace the present ginger-ale manufacturer. The new schedule will also mean the end of making records of the broadcast for airing on the West Coast.

(BALK! Oh, and tell the groundskeeper to get out here and turn home plate back the way it's supposed to go.)

(Zip knows all about everything and is just here to troll. That's how this family works.)

(That's what you get for speaking before the Black Suits.)

(Well, gee Irwin, you ought to put your name in at Texaco. I hear they have an opening.)

 

[LizzieMaine]

And in the Daily News...

Pfft to this bum, and why drag Hedy's name into it? She has nothing to do with this story.

(Jinx will go on to become a popular radio personality, hosting a long-running morning talk show with her husband Tex McCrary, going head to head against the more popular Dorothy Kilgallen and Dick Kollmar. Dorothy also endorses Rheingold, which is called "hedging your bets.")

(And none of them, amazingly enough, ever endorsed Rheingold.)

Given what we know of Annie's skill at manipulation, I'd be terrified to have her in my house.

Wouldn't dry ice directly applied to a leather case make it so brittle it'd crumble to pieces unless there's some kind of protective liner? But even that, I'd expect, would make it too chilly to comfortably carry in a pocket. So what I'm saying is, Yogee must have a frostbitten backside. Be on the lookout for that.

Oh, don't even try with the knife. If Big Stoop doesn't tear you limb from limb, Connie will.

Well, then you should immediately turn yourself in. You'll be safer in jail anyway, once Mama finds out.

The first time ever that a desk drawer gets a makeover.

And to think he was once the unchallenged fashion plate of Covina High. He was wearing his letter sweater yesterday, but the letter was so embarrassed it fell off.

Vintage Things That Have Disappeared In Your Lifetime: Cooling hot coffee by pouring it into the saucer.