LizzieMaine
Bartender
- Messages
- 33,726
- Location
- Where The Tourists Meet The Sea
("Magine 'nat," marvels Joe between sips of his egg cream. "Penicillin. Y'know, I read'n awrticle'na magazine said t'ey make it f'm moldy oranges a' sump'n. We got a moldy orange inna ice box at home. I otta donate it." "We live in an age'a wondaaars," agrees Ma. "Y'know," continues Joe, "las' winteh Leonoreh had awlem eeh infections an'ney jus' hadda let'm drain out. Pooeh kid was mis'r'b'l. I wonneh if t'is winteh wec'n get some'a t'is penicillin? I mean, if t'wawr is oveh by Chris'mas, maybe we c'n get some." "Thaaat's a big *if*, Joseph," warns Ma. "Sure, aaan' it looks good roit now, but ye shouldn't count ye chickens..." "I was read'n'a'nut'teh awrticle in a magazine," Joe resumes. "Populeh M'chanics, a' one a' t'em kin'a magazines. An' it was tawkin' 'bout television. Y'know, like at t' Woil's Faieh. Hey, l eveh show ya t'is?" Joe opens his billfold to produce a small pink card declaring that on June 25, 1939 Jos. Petrauskas was TELEVISED at the RCA Pavillion. "See t'eh?" he continues. "I been *televised.* An' inna fut'cheh, t'is awrticle says, television's gonna be ev'ywe'h! Bawlgames on television ev'ry day, fights, hawrse races -- hey, 'magine'nis -- someday ya gonna be able to wawk in a place an' see awl kin'sa hawrse racin' f'm awloveh t'country, getcha bets down, an' see t'winnehs right onna spot." "Remarrrkable," muses Ma. "Yeh," declares Joe. "But, y'know, I bet t'at's gonna put a lotta canny stoehs outa business." "What?" "Al'tough," he demurs, "I s'pose t'ehs awrways bingo.")
A report over the Rome radio broadcast today stated that the Italian Government has asked the Vatican and Switzerland to notify the Allies of orders that the city be stripped of all military works in order to make the Italian capital an open city. The dispatch from the Italian Stefani News Agency stated that all German and Italian commands are being shifted out of Rome along with all operational forces, save a small garrison retained to preserve public order. Defense installations in Rome were ordered put out of operation, direction was given for all anti-aircraft batteries to withhold all fire, and for fighter planes not to engage any Allied aircraft spotted over the city. The Stefani report further stated that the Rome railroad junction will no longer be used to supply the military or for the loading, unloading, or storage of any military trains.
The Chinese Central News Agency reported today that Admiral Mineichi Koga, successor to Admiral Isoruku Yamamoto as commander-in-chief of the Japanese navy, was killed at sea last month during an Allied bombing raid in the Southwest Pacific. The Chinese dispatch quoted a Chinese military source in reporting that Koga died aboard his flagship during an attack by Allied planes in the New Ireland-New Britain Island area north of New Guinea,
Allied ground troops have seized a bridgehead across the Francisco River, tightening the siege
of the Salamaua airdrome on the New Guinea coast, it was announced today. The crossing was carried out as aircraft pounded steadily the Japanese-held base and warships ranged up the New Guinea coast to shell for the first time the Finsch Harbor area. The crossing put Australian forces in strength approximately two miles from the airdrome.
(Now that's what I call a HERO.)
Stringent new regulations intended to crack down on the health menace posed by black market meat in the city go into effect September 15th, when an amendment to the Sanitary Code approved this week by the Board of Health establishes a rigorous local inspection system requiring that the originating source and destination be specified for all meat sold anywhere in New York City. "The situation has become so critical," Mayor LaGuardia declared today, "that it constitutes a health problem. In normal times we have known sources of origin and it is easy to check with Federal authorities. But now, meat is coming from all sources, there are many new slaughterers, and there is so much diversion to illegitimate channels that there is no means of telling whether meat is sanitary or not." Under the new code, no meat may be sold in the city that is not clearly identified at every point in ts processing and sale, from the slaughter house to the butcher block, by means of certificates spelling out each step in the process.
Meat industry officials, meanwhile, reported an increase in cases of evasion of ceiling prices at the wholesale level, with many small distributors reported to be selling meat on an under-the-table cash-on-the-side arrangement with the slaughterhouses that supply them, and with the local retailers they supply to. Corroboration of this situation was seen in reports from the Federal Market News Service indicating that prices of such small wholesalers "could not be confirmed."
Queens detectives and FBI agents have joined today in the hunt for burglars who used an electric drill and a sledgehammer to crack a safe in the office of the Jamaica War Rationing Board, escaping with ration coupons good for over 1.3 million gallons of gasoline. Stamps from the A, B, C, and TT ration classifications were stolen in the robbery, but the B and C coupons are of the type that will become invalid on September 1st. The burglars left behind their sledgehammer beside the broken safe.
Fathers in "least essential" jobs can expect to be called into military service before 1944, according to the latest indications from Maj. Gen. Lewis B. Hershey, head of Selective Service. Figures included in a letter by Gen. Hershey to the nation's 6500 local draft boards specify that a draft defecit of approximately 446,000 men will need to be made up before the end of 1943, and that fathers in "least essential" employment constitute the most likely group of eligible men available to meet this need. Gen. Hershey directed local boards to carefully review all fathers in their files and determine each man's current contribution to the war effort thru his employment in order to take first the fathers who "contribute least."
("I ain' goin' noweh," declares Sally. "Me nie'teh," affirms Alice. "Woul'n hoit my feelins none if Mildred Kelly lef' t'ough," Sally adds. "Oh, she ain' so bad," argues Alice. "Once ya get t'know 'eh. She gimme t'is lit'l white pill 't utteh day when I was runnin' down, poiked me right up. I give one t' Sid las' night. Poiked him right up too." "Krause??" snorts Sally. "Poiked up??" A wrinkle of her Pert Irish Nose is Alice's enigmatic reply.)
(KIDS TODAY)
A 35-year-old Williamsburg deckhand is in the Raymond Street Jail on a charge of simple assault for beating his 7-year-old son, who was, according to the child, "too slow" in picking up papers off the floor. William Deveny was convicted yesterday after his son Wilfred testified in Special Sessions Court that his father had kicked him to the floor and then punched him in the face, head, and body when he did not act as quickly as desired in picking up papers scattered on the kitchen floor. It was Deveny's second arrest in connection with harm to his son. Earlier this year, Deveny was brought into court on charges that he broke Wilfred's arm while the child was in bed with the German measles, but that charge was dismissed. Deveny will remain jailed pending sentence on August 31st.
("We must draw 13,300 a game for the remaining games on the schedule to meet our quota!" declares Mr. Rickey. "In ordinary circumstances this would be the work of an instant, but now, alas, it requires extraordinary measures, extraordinary measures I say!" "Yes dear," yawns Mrs. Rickey. "If I might offer a suggestion," she continues, sipping a tall lemonade, "wouldn't the people here appreciate a Dolph Camilli Day?" "Oh yes," nods Mr. Rickey with excessive enthusiasm. "Judas Priest, what a wonderful idea. A Camilli day. We could fete the man, deliver speeches, award him a fine prize horse for his ranch, there would be no limit to the excitement and goodwill such an event might generate. No limit, I tell you! Hmm. How late do you suppose the slaughterhouses in New Jersey are open?")
("And don't try climbing up the fire escape. You're no Dude Hennick.")
("But before I get more coffee, I need to get a new shower curtain.")
("Raselane? But you can't dance!" "I *WON'T* dance! Don't ask me!")
(AMERICA'S NUMBER ONE HERO DOG IS ALWAYS GRATEFUL FOR SMALL MIRACLES.)
(Peg leg, eye patch -- you've got to admire his committment to the bit.)
