The Art of Social Kissing.

[jamespowers]

My people reserve physical contact of any kind only for family and the closest of friends. My family's of Scottish descent and we don't like to be touched.

I don't even do that with the closest of friends. Anything beyond a handshake weirds me out. Yes, my family came from a Mediterranean clime but none of that handsy stuff was ever done.
In fact, last Saturday, I went to a birthday party for one of my sons' friends and I have known them for quite a while but they know better than to hug me. lol lol Shake hands is enough.
The funny thing is that my youngest son loves to hug everybody. It is embarrassing! :doh: My other son is more like I am. lol lol Maybe the youngest will grow out of it.
I never kissed my father---I knew better. My mother---usually when I left to go some place when I was younger. My grandparents on both sides were not big huggers etc. either.
My wife's family is a little different. Her brothers might be that way with my boys but they know better with me.

 

[LuvMyMan]

I don't even do that with the closest of friends. Anything beyond a handshake weirds me out. Yes, my family came from a Mediterranean clime but none of that handsy stuff was ever done.
In fact, last Saturday, I went to a birthday party for one of my sons' friends and I have known them for quite a while but they know better than to hug me. lol lol Shake hands is enough.
The funny thing is that my youngest son loves to hug everybody. It is embarrassing! :doh: My other son is more like I am. lol lol Maybe the youngest will grow out of it.
I never kissed my father---I knew better. My mother---usually when I left to go some place when I was younger. My grandparents on both sides were not big huggers etc. either.
My wife's family is a little different. Her brothers might be that way with my boys but they know better with me.

Geez...if I or Daniel ever have the chance to meet you (and a few other loungers) expect a hug at the least. LOL!

 

[Big Man]

In the South, it's good social etiquette to take your 'chaw of tobacco out before kissing.

 

[jamespowers]

Geez...if I or Daniel ever have the chance to meet you (and a few other loungers) expect a hug at the least. LOL!

Oh I can manage it. I am not like Felix Unger.

 

[jamespowers]

In the South, it's good social etiquette to take your 'chaw of tobacco out before kissing.

:eeek: :rofl:

 

[ChiTownScion]

Doesn't bother me one way or the other, really. I have a European, "when in Rome" attitude about the whole thing. I prefer a firm handshake from another man, but if a lady wants to kiss my cheek I'm more amused than intimidated. Heck, I've had women who are complete strangers come up to me and ask to run their fingers through my hair: I find it amusing. And if the President of France ever wants to welcome me in as a Chevalier into Ordre national de la Légion d'honneur with the traditional kisses, my fragile male ego will somehow survive and I'll still have a story to tell the grandkids.

 

[jamespowers]

Doesn't bother me one way or the other, really. I have a European, "when in Rome" attitude about the whole thing. I prefer a firm handshake from another man, but if a lady wants to kiss my cheek I'm more amused than intimidated. Heck, I've had women who are complete strangers come up to me and ask to run their fingers through my hair: I find it amusing. And if the President of France ever wants to welcome me in as a Chevalier into Ordre national de la Légion d'honneur with the traditional kisses, my fragile male ego will somehow survive and I'll still have a story to tell the grandkids.

Great then you can also tell them how you got herpes from some dunce kissing you too. :doh:

 

[ChiTownScion]

Great then you can also tell them how you got herpes from some dunce kissing you too. :doh:

Yeah. About as much of a chance of that happening from a kiss on the cheek as getting an STD from a toilet seat.

 

[Bamaboots]

O

Doesn't bother me one way or the other, really. I have a European, "when in Rome" attitude about the whole thing. I prefer a firm handshake from another man, but if a lady wants to kiss my cheek I'm more amused than intimidated. Heck, I've had women who are complete strangers come up to me and ask to run their fingers through my hair: I find it amusing. And if the President of France ever wants to welcome me in as a Chevalier into Ordre national de la Légion d'honneur with the traditional kisses, my fragile male ego will somehow survive and I'll still have a story to tell the grandkids.

Well, at least you have hair. I've had strangers approach me and attempt to rub my shaved head. Not gonna kill me or give me a communicable disease, it's just more about respecting my space and understanding we don't all think and feel as one.

 

[HoosierDaddy]

A friend of mine has had his head shaved for years since he was getting quite thin on top. I swear..most everywhere he goes (girl) friends are, for some reason, drawn to kiss him on top of the head. He just hates that and often turns red as a beet. Can't help but laugh....
HD

 

[Haversack]

I recall that when my grandfather took me to England in the mid-1960s to visit and show me off to relatives, (I was about 10), he told me not to think it strange when he and his elder brother kissed when we finished our visit with them. He was in his 70s then and said that he and his brother would likely never see each other again. Rather solemn, that.

That said, the Kiss of Peace has an extremely long history among Catholic and Orthodox Christians. It apparently is a pre-Christian social custom from the eastern Mediterranean that was adopted into the early church. The New Testament is full of admonitions for believers to greet each other with a kiss. It is part of several different liturgies still in practice.

 

[Zombie_61]

Great then you can also tell them how you got herpes from some dunce kissing you too. :doh:

That reminds me--I neglected to mention in my previous post that I have a strict "No tongues" policy when greeting male family members and friends.

Yes, I went there. Welcome to the gutter.

 

[GHT]

Im about as comfortable with it as I am the man-hug. Where in the hell did that come from and why has it persisted.

Curious, you mention a man-hug greeting, whilst social kissing has found favour again throughout Europe, I've never seen, or even heard of men greeting each other thus. That is, until I watched the finale of "The Masters" on tv late into Sunday night.

Jordan Spieth must have been hugged by every family relative and hanger-on going. What was that all about?

 

[GHT]

That reminds me--I neglected to mention in my previous post that I have a strict "No tongues" policy when greeting male family members and friends.

Would you be good enough to tell my neighbour's Labrador that please. I tell him he needs to be a bitch to be that familiar, completely ignores me.

 

[scottyrocks]

As stated above, here in the NYC area, social kissing is quite common.

For me, I take my cues from the woman's body language. When meeting a woman for the first time, there is no kissing, afaic, but if the encounter has been a pleasant one, more often than not, her body language at the conclusion of the evening warrants that light cheek to cheek thing.

I offer my hand first and foremost, and then yes, again as stated above, that gentle tug, combined with other body language, makes it relatively easy to know what to do or not to do.

Having been in the local motorcycling community for as long as I had been, kissing good male friends on the cheek, or receiving same (but not both together), combined with a handshake-hug is not unheard of, either. It's just a matter of getting over the whole homophobia thing.

 

[Bamaboots]

For me, it's not a homophobic thing. I grew up where one gave men a simple firm handshake and the same with ladies, if they offered their hand. Greeting close friends and family with a hug is not uncommon, I was referring to meeting people for the first time.

 

[V.C. Brunswick]

I think my Italian family was abnormal or something. They were all very distant (physically) around each other. Big family - eight brothers and sisters and the last one just died last year, so they all lived long lives. Always very close-knit and didn't like outsiders. But physical affection? I can't remember any of that. But there was definitely some weirdness going on. Three of the core family committed suicide (my great-grandmother and two of my great-uncles). Yeah, that's a novel I'd like to write, and maybe now that they're all gone, I can.

They're from Northern Italy, too - around the Turin area. I don't know if that makes a difference or not as far as showing affection...are Italians in southern Italy more prone to that than those in Northern Italy? I really don't have any idea.

I would guess that Northern Italy, being closer to Austria and Switzerland has a fair amount of a Central European (i.e. Germanic) cultural influence than, say, Naples, Calabria or Sicily, that makes them more reserved.

 

[pawineguy]

I would guess that Northern Italy, being closer to Austria and Switzerland has a fair amount of a Central European (i.e. Germanic) cultural influence than, say, Naples, Calabria or Sicily, that makes them more reserved.

Having visited both areas, and done business in each region, I totally agree with this assessment.

 

[Babydoll]

I don't have a consistent rule about social kissing. My friends and I usually hug hard and long, but there are a few (usually guys, go figure) that I'll smooch on the cheek.... usually someone I've known for a really, really long time.

My family.... we're not huge huggers, and definitely not kissers. I don't hug any of my siblings. (First time in 15+ years my next older brother hugged me was at my bro-in-law's viewing in January. I didn't cry that entire day until Bubba squeezed me and held on tight. Brought tears to his eyes, too.) I hug my dad occasionally (not often enough), and my mom almost everytime I see her. Aunts, uncles, cousins.... I rarely see them, so usually I hug them, but never kisses.

Lily, however.... she's a HUGE hugger, and a smoocher. She hugs her friends at storytime at the library, her favorite clerks at the grocery store, her ballet teacher, and she tackle hugs anyone that is remotely a relative. She gives her Grammie and Papa (my parents) hugs and kisses. I don't force her to do it, she just loves them and that is how she chooses to express her feelings for them. Little body, huge feelings, have to come out somehow.

We're headed to Hubby's family reunion in July down in Texas. We've been married almost 9 years (been together for 10 years as of tomorrow), and I've not met 95% of the people that will be there. From what I've experienced on previous visits, they are huggers/kissers. I'm not sure how comfortable I'll be with that. Lily will be fine. Hope they aren't offended when I wave at them, or offer my hand.

 

[jamespowers]

Yeah. About as much of a chance of that happening from a kiss on the cheek as getting an STD from a toilet seat.

All you need is skin to skin contact.