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Suit etiquette: What would you do?

Babydoll

Call Me a Cab
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2,483
Location
The Emerald City
I posted this question elsewhere, but didn't get an answer. So, I'm re-posting.

Gentlemen, I have a "what would you do" question to pose.

Recently on myflight home from Portland, I noticed a young man (early 20s) across the aisle and up a row from me. The young man was wearing what appeared to be a modern suit and shiny Italian loafers that showed off his fancy socks. He appeared to be quite well put together as the colors he had were complimentary to one another, but had enough contrast in patterns of fabric that it was interesting to look at.

But then I noticed "IT"! The collar of his jacket was folded up in back.... exposing the raw, unfinished lining of his suit collar. I was mortified for him. Here he went to the extent of dressing so nicely, only to have it spoiled by the collar betraying how much his suit really cost him.

The mother in me wanted to reach over and fold down the collar for him, but I kept reminding myself that although I think that's a "normal" thing to do (I don't even flinch about tucking in someone's tag), he might think me a freak, and therefore I didn't do anything. The last I saw of him, he was making a mad dash for the train to take him to another sattelite of the airport to make his connecting flight.

So, for the big question: Would you have told him that his collar was up? And then promptly given him your tailor's card?
 

vonwotan

Practically Family
Messages
696
Location
East Boston, MA
I think you reactied in much the way I would - had the urge to point out / fix the problem but hesitated. I would hesitate to point things out these days because I seem to be completely out of touch with fashion and what is fashionable. Recently someone posted photos from fashion week and the men's suits on display. While I do appreciate the more fitted slimer line - I can't say that I would buy any of those outfits.

I've seen men wearing suits with collars up, sleeves and pants too short, IMHO, with t-shirts (nothing new), etc. So I'm always afraid that I would be criticising someones personal fashion choices.
 

patrick1987

One of the Regulars
Messages
295
Location
Rochester
The rule is that if it is something that can be remedied at once then you should tell the person. Lipstick or spinach on the teeth, a lady's slip showing, a label sticking to the back of the sleeve, a pice of lint, etc. I would hate to be the guy who had something weird turned around on my clothes and wail "Why didn't someone TELL me?" when I next looked in a mirror or whatever. I can always answer "Oh thanks but it's supposed to be like that" if it is the case for some strange reason. Most of the time it would be "Oh thanks most people are too timid to say anything to help another guy out and otherwise I wouldn't have known." Tell, yes. Touch, no. Tailor's card, no. That might be an insult.
 

Jack Straw

New in Town
Messages
8
Location
The Cascades
I think I probably would've just mentioned it to him by saying something like "Did you know your collar is up?" I guess he could say "Whoops, and thanks" or "Uh, yeah it's supposed to be like that!", at which point I would say "Oh, yes. How stupid of me."

It's hard to know nowadays with all the malarkey that passes for fashion. One person's embarrassment is another's pride I suppose. ;)
 

scotrace

Head Bartender
Staff member
Messages
14,393
Location
Small Town Ohio, USA
Some of us do wear them up like that on occasion, on purpoose - just about any suit jacket will expose an unfinished underside.

My vote is you did the right thing by saying nothing. If it is something that is almost 100% certainly accidental (no one has spinach on their teeth on purpose) you can safely say something. But a collar up has at least a 50-50 chance of being intentional, in which case you don't want to point it out.
 

Tomasso

Incurably Addicted
Messages
13,719
Location
USA
Babydoll said:
But then I noticed "IT"! The collar of his jacket was folded up in back.... exposing the raw, unfinished lining of his suit collar...... betraying how much his suit really cost him.
As Scotrace noted, most collar undersides are not finished unless they're intended to be popped, such as with country jackets. Self lining or suede is often used.



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carebear

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,220
Location
Anchorage, AK
scotrace said:
Some of us do wear them up like that on occasion, on purpoose - just about any suit jacket will expose an unfinished underside.

Why?

Assuming it isn't blustery and you need the neck warmth, why would you pop a suit collar?
 

Feraud

Bartender
Messages
17,188
Location
Hardlucksville, NY
carebear said:
Why?

Assuming it isn't blustery and you need the neck warmth, why would you pop a suit collar?
When I want to look like a suspicious cad, I pop up the suit collar and pull down the brim of my hat. :)

This look works also for having spent all night carousing with the boys, avoiding bookies, and certain dames.
 

Jovan

Suspended
Messages
4,095
Location
Gainesville, Florida
I would have told him. But why was he wearing loafers? :eek: I don't like loafers at all, but it's another crime entirely to pair them with a suit.

The oddest detail I ever saw was on a basic J. Crew blazer... it had a blue/red repp stripe fabric on the underside of the collar. I'd wear that as a tie, but not there.
 

carebear

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,220
Location
Anchorage, AK
Jovan said:
Something about them just looks slobbish and not very polished at all.

Somewhat unrealistically, part of my footwear decision making process involves the question, "What if I had to run for it?"

If the answer ends with the shoe coming off in deep mud and the like, leaving me in stocking feet, those shoes don't get boughten.

No easy slip loafers or unsecured sandals for me, ever.

But I'm "eccentric". :D
 

Cacklewack

One of the Regulars
Messages
270
Location
Portland, OR
carebear said:
Somewhat unrealistically, part of my footwear decision making process involves the question, "What if I had to run for it?"

If the answer ends with the shoe coming off in deep mud and the like, leaving me in stocking feet, those shoes don't get boughten.

No easy slip loafers or unsecured sandals for me, ever.

But I'm "eccentric". :D

You live in Alaska. At all times you must be prepared to run from a grizzly bear.

Matt
 

Orgetorix

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,241
Location
Louisville, KY...and I'm a 42R, 7 1/2
Baron Kurtz said:
i can see why loafers would be good for plane travel. Slip on/off without laces.
bk

True, but feet can swell during flights because of the change in pressure, and loafers don't have a lot of room to give. Some people will take their loafers off when they get on a plane, and then find they can't get them back on again when it's landing time. I usually wear bluchers when I'm flying.
 

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