Respecting dresses too much?

[wahine]

I recently noticed something weird about myself. Instead of wearing my vintage pieces, I choose one of my few modern outfits. One reason clearly is laziness, like when I don't feel like doing my hair or got prickly legs, I prefer a modern jeans outfit.

But, another reason is, as it seems now, that I'm afraid of ruining my vintage wardrobe! When it stays in the cupboard, it stays nice, whole and clean. I'm not exactly the collector type (or at least I always thought so), and I don't even have real old or pricey stuff.
But I always seem to think "When it's ruined, will I get another one like this?" (prices are rising and I don't have too much money).

I got at least twice as many different vintage outfits than modern ones. Sewing dress shields in many dresses helped a bit, but I'm still so reluctant to use the vintage stuff on an every day basis.
How silly am I?! :eusa_doh:
How can I get this out of my system?

 

[Stormy]

I kinda have this problem too; I'd much rather preserve all my vintage stuff than wear it. I have so many outfits that have gotten way too small now, but I won't part with them. I've come to realize that having vintage clothes is not always about sporting them. Sometimes it's merely about hoarding little bits and pieces of history. This way we are able to create bonds between ourselves and the best that the past had to offer.

 

[scarlett]

Wahine I don't know if you can get it out of your system. I have a the same issue when I'm getting dressed. I tend to save my best vintage for special occasions. I am not afraid of wearing my lovely things, I just worry that if I wear them too often it results in cleaning and wear and tear. I try to find a balance between wearing and preserving.

 

[wahine]

Good to know that I'm not the only one with this kind of thinking. I guess it's good to preserve the items that are really special, like if they're of a very delicate fabric, or a special designer, or something we inherited from someone. But most of the things I have are none of that. A few things are from my grandma, but besides one or two dresses, there's nothing really special about them. So I don't really see a reason not to wear them. About half of my wardrobe can even be washed in the washing machine (although I love the fifties, a lot of my things is from the seventies since the fifties stuff is hard to get or too expensive for me).

Well, it seems that I almost got myself convinced to wear my things more often

Today, one other reason to refrain from wearing those clothes came to my mind. Whenever I dress up, I usually feel great and pretty. But often it seems I'm the only one who sees it this way. I hardly ever get compliments. One reason is that my friends and family aren't really the type to make compliments at all (let alone people on the street - the Northern German usually isn't exactly the outgoing type).
And if someone ever does bring himself to make a compliment, then it's something like: "Some people surely would say you look like a grandma, but I think you got your own special style, and that's better than looking like everybody else." It usually doesn't get any better than that. I must admit that it sometimes depresses me a little when I think I look great while everybody else gives me the feeling that they don't notice or even see it differently.

 

[Fading Fast]

There is no perfect answer, but the older I get, the more I am leaning to wearing the clothes, enjoying them and if something becomes threadbare, et al. - then you can put it in the closet collection. I would not advocate indiscriminately wearing the clothes in all weather or to go to the supermarket, but on good days and for fun events wear and enjoy them. I find that I have better memories and more fun from the clothes when I wear them than when I "save" them. Again, within reason, clothes were meant to be worn and enjoyed. To another point, if no one else appreciates them or compliments you, so be it, the joy should be intrinsic to you. You have chosen a niche hobby; the fun is what you get from it, not what others do. Think of it as an old book - which I love: I read them, enjoy that they are x number of years old - I love the smell, feel and history of them - and I understand but don't care that most people think of them as junk. Enjoy your clothes.

 

[sheeplady]

The question I would ask anyone who does this (and I do this too) is: If you knew you were dying in a years time, would you wear it?

If the answer is "yes" I suggest you pull it out of the closet and wear it. Life is too short to save stuff for no purpose. You're not going to get a second act, you're on stage right now and this is the life you've been given. You'll be a lot sorrier to find out that you didn't wear something you loved than you wore something you loved and it got worn out.

Take pictures of yourself in it, be happy while wearing it, and live your life.

 

[wahine]

Thank you ladies, I think you are very wise! Life is short and we're supposed to make the best of it. So why keep anything for a time that might never come or for some heir who might just throw it in the trash. Maybe I should put a paper sign on my wardrobe, saying "Life is short" or something similar.

Of course it's true as well that it doesn't really matter if somebody else likes my stuff or not. Usually I do think and feel that way. But sometimes it'd just be nice to know that I'm not alone in my eccentricity. Well, the next time someone else is not appreciating my style, I'll think of you ladies.

 

[Miss Sis]

I do understand what you mean about not wanting to 'wear things out', which will happen if you wash and wear vintage constantly. I personally don't wear it all the time, because I have to wear a uniform for my job and even if I didn't, I still couldn't wear vintage anyway (I am a Nursery Nurse/Early Years Educator looking after children and get *very* messy!), but I also think it would take away from the 'specialness' if I wore it every single day.

I occasionally mix vintage with more modern, but I like wearing it top to toe in the main, so making an occasion to wear it, such as going up town, to an event, out for the day or to a dance works in my mind, as it gets worn and enjoyed, but not put under too much stress. Best solution I can find.

There is of course the option to buy or make reproduction clothing that'll stand up to harder wear. Don't let your worries stop you from enjoying your clothes!

 

[katiemakeup]

The question I would ask anyone who does this (and I do this too) is: If you knew you were dying in a years time, would you wear it?

If the answer is "yes" I suggest you pull it out of the closet and wear it. Life is too short to save stuff for no purpose. You're not going to get a second act, you're on stage right now and this is the life you've been given. You'll be a lot sorrier to find out that you didn't wear something you loved than you wore something you loved and it got worn out.

Take pictures of yourself in it, be happy while wearing it, and live your life.

RIGHT-O

We blink our eyes and 5 years pass. WEAR IT and ENJOY Every day should be a special occassion

 

[Miss Moonlight]

This is why I like repro and vintage inspired clothing. You can preserve your vintage pieces for special occasions, but you can still look the way you prefer instead of modern.

But- I've only got a few vintage items these days, and if I wore them all the time, they'd be worn out by now.

 

[LizzieMaine]

If you wear them, damage them, and then repair them they'll be even more authentic. Resewn seams, rewoven fabric, camouflaged stains were all an everyday fact of life in the Era.

 

[Idledame]

I have a 1920s beige silk dress that is in wearable condition AND fits me! But I haven't worn it yet because I don't want to sweat in it or spill anything on it. That age dress might mean only one wearing. I started to put it on at the Art Deco Society weekend on the Queen Mary last year, but instead decided to wear a dress I made from a 1920s pattern so I wouldn't have to worry about it. Wouldn't you know it, a waitress spilled a whole drink on me! I was so glad I wore the homemade one! It was silk but I had prewashed the material so I knew it would be fine. Whew! Maybe I'll get brave and wear it this year.

 

[wahine]

LizzieMaine, you got a point there. Only that I'm unsure if I'm able to do a real good repair job. I'm pracitising quite a bit, mending my socks and underskirts and such.

 

[Lady X]

It's difficult to get over the awe factor at first, but in the long run, clothes are simply clothes and their function is to be worn, to make you look good, and to be admired. The more you dare to wear your pieces, the less worried you'll be - start thinking "oh, I'll wear my blue thing tonight," instead of "Oh, my god, do I dare to wear my vintage, very rare, cost me this much, irreplaceable" thing. It'll also make your look more natural - if you're comfortable in what you're wearing, you look more natural; somebody whose gingerly going around, worried about stains or damage looks like an actor in a costume. To get comfortable, you can try just wearing your vintage things by yourself in your bedroom; get used to putting it on, taking it off, walking, sitting, turning - like breaking in a pair of new shoes, the more you interact with and get to know it, the more comfortable you'll be wearing it out and about.

To put it in perspective, I recently had to go through my grandmother's things after she passed away. The sheer number of clothes she owned, never worn, carefully hung away in the back of the closet, was heartbreaking - she was constantly saving them for "a special occasion," and never thought anything was special enough. Wouldn't it be better to have worn something once, looked stunning and ruined it and have had a great time and a story to tell than to never have worn them at all?

More perspective: your vintage pieces DID last this long. They're pre-owned. Some lady DID wear them back in the day. Wore them indoors, outdoors, to parties, danced, sweated, made out on a sopha, possibly lost a button, sewed it back on, washed them, ironed then .... who KNOWS where they've has been and what adventures they lived through. Give them some more stories.