Pregnancy when your "older"..

[Vintage Betty]

Congratulations are in order! I'm sure your doctor will advise about folic acid and vitamins , but in addition, try to get her to stop smoking or drinking coffee, if either of those are her vices. And to stop drinking alcohol too.

Those three things have negative effects during the pregnancy if used on a frequent basis. Type in coffee and pregnancy into a search engine and you will immediately find the latest study that was just released - it's very interesting.

Best wishes to you and your family, and how sweet of you to be worried.

Vintage Betty

 

[Lady Day]

Have you talked to your Mom about how you feel?

Go with her to see the Dr. Ask questions.

Its pointless to worry from the crass comment from an ill informed 'friend'.

LD

 

[Mike in Seattle]

...when I told my friend the news the first thing that popped out of her mouth was that my mom was too old to be having kids and that the baby would be sick..so now I feel much more scared then excited.

In simple terms, not to use your description, your friend's an idiot. Considering your own description of your "friend" - get some other friends.

Your mom's seen her doctor, and there are no concerns outside of the normal for a woman her age and condition. Who has the more valued opinion - your friend or the doctor your mom's apparently been going to and knows something of her history and whether there's any cause for alarm?

My grandmother was mid 40s when she had my mom. Outside of the fact my uncle (who was just married and 22 at the time) and my aunt (19) thought it absolutely appalling that their strict, God-fearing, church matron mother was pregnant (and, of course, knowing the cause of the condition) and their church deacon father to have taken part in it, everything was fine. That was in the late 20's, and medical science has grown by leaps and bounds since then.

My opinion - relax. Don't try to create a problem where none exists. The doctor's paid to consider that sort of thing and keep tabs on it.

 

[jayem]

Having children in your 40s is not so much a complication as it has been in the past. Technology has made huge improvements on this, and 8 out of 10 times the baby if born with no defects other than maybe being slightly premature.

My mom had my brother when she was 41 and everything went fine. It's not the pregnancy itself you should be worried about.. it's the after effects. My brother is now 9, and I have to say I pretty much raised him. My mom wasn't neglectful, she was just tired. I don't blame her. She had my older brother and myself in her 20s (me, just before she turned 30), and still had enough energy to do all the numerous tasks in order to properly raise a child. I was 11 when my brother was born, and a good chunk of my teenage years were spent taking care of my baby brother.

 

[goldwyn girl]

My friend is 44, her baby is due next week and there have been no problems, she was just a little more tired. Congratulations to your mum it's very exciting.

 

[dollydaydream]

I think the worst thing you can do is worry about some stupid remark your friend made!

Be excited!! My step mother had her youngest when she was 45. It would seem that we're all late starters in my family, my mum had me at 27, which was considered old at the time apparently!! My Grandma had her youngest when she was 39, and everything's turned out ok.

You seem like a lovely girl to be concerned, goodness knows I'd be worried sick, but it seems like you're doing your best to find out the facts which should help you and your mum both.

Good luck to everyone, let us know how it goes

 

[Drea]

Congratulations are in order! I'm sure your doctor will advise about folic acid and vitamins , but in addition, try to get her to stop smoking or drinking coffee, if either of those are her vices. And to stop drinking alcohol too.

Those three things have negative effects during the pregnancy if used on a frequent basis. Type in coffee and pregnancy into a search engine and you will immediately find the latest study that was just released - it's very interesting.

Best wishes to you and your family, and how sweet of you to be worried.

Vintage Betty

My mom has never smoked a ciggarette..or has ever drank any kind of alchohol or has done any drugs!!actually I think she drank champagne at a wedding once or twice..but thats it. and I think she only drinks coffee sometimes but i'll make sure she doesn't!!

I think I just worry about her because shes from a different country and you know where shes from they don't have the information or know certain facts..when she had my brother she only went to the doctor ONCE the DAY before he was born!!! and he turned out fine thank goodness...maybe it's just a much bigger deal to me because there's lots of people who are my age that have kids..it feels almost like I'm having one!!! since my sister was born when I was so much younger I couldn't understand what my mom was going through but now that I'm older I deffinitly notice the changes!!

thank you guys all so much for your advice and your kind words..I did much more research and I had my mom read tons of stuff and learn things she didn't know before so I feel more excited again..thank you all!!! and she says she'll take me to the doctor with her next appointment!!! and I'll be sure to attack the doctor with questions hahahaha but I'll keep you all updated

 

[Paisley]

I re-read my post and it sounded more negative than I intended. I guess I was miffed for you about your friend's remarks.

Being 39 years old myself, and having parents who were about that age when I was born, I agree with what others have said about having less energy than when you're young (even if you're in good shape). But when you're 40-ish, you probably have more money, more patience, and more wisdom.