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Widebrim

I'll Lock Up
I'm your cousin Basil.:yo:
shempport.jpg
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Brilliant! Which also means that you get socked in the puss by a Christine McIntyre look-alike...

I guess I'd be the serious-looking, but amiable, suit-wearing uncle who instinctively reaches for his M1 Garand every time he hears a sudden, loud noise...and who is married to rue's sister.
 

amador

A-List Customer
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372
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Great thread!!
Need some Drama?
I want to be the uncle who authorized "pulling the plug" on Grandma. Now at family gatherings after a few drinks someone always points the finger and says "You're the one who killed grandma". That's why I only stay for one drink.
There's more...
 
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Miss sofia

One Too Many
Messages
1,675
Location
East sussex, England
OOh i like this thread, can i be the wildly appropriate old aunty who arrives at parties in extravagant hats, with a hip flask in her handbag and who teaches all her nieces and nephews how to swear in several different languages??
 

rue

Messages
13,319
Location
California native living in Arizona.
Great thread!!
Need some Drama?
I want to be the uncle who authorized "pulling the plug" on Grandma. Now at family gatherings after a few drinks someone always points the finger and says "You're the one who killed grandma". That's why I only stay for one drink.
There's more...

More? You already killed grandma.... what else could there be? :p
 

amador

A-List Customer
Messages
372
Location
Locum Tenens
Well I had the nerve to go to the funeral after all. I got the nerve from a bottle. I didn't mean to start a scene. I was also the one that had Grandpa declared incompetent. This had caused Grandma to do poorly. Two weeks after the funeral grandpa also died, heart broken.
Dark Evil Uncle, there is more...
I need another drink, things are starting to clear up...
 

rue

Messages
13,319
Location
California native living in Arizona.
Well I had the nerve to go to the funeral after all. I got the nerve from a bottle. I didn't mean to start a scene. I was also the one that had Grandpa declared incompetent. This had caused Grandma to do poorly. Two weeks after the funeral grandpa also died, heart broken.
Dark Evil Uncle, there is more...
I need another drink, things are starting to clear up...

Oh the shame.... how could you?
 

amador

A-List Customer
Messages
372
Location
Locum Tenens
That's another issue, I feel that I did the right thing. If gramps hadn't been declared then one of the distant cousins would have continued to cash the social security checks and the Veteran's benefits. Everyone wondered about "gainful employment" to support his kids.
After the gramps were gone, cousin had to hit on his relatives for money.
Gets worse....
 

rue

Messages
13,319
Location
California native living in Arizona.
That's another issue, I feel that I did the right thing. If gramps hadn't been declared then one of the distant cousins would have continued to cash the social security checks and the Veteran's benefits. Everyone wondered about "gainful employment" to support his kids.
After the gramps were gone, cousin had to hit on his relatives for money.
Gets worse....

I'm afraid to ask.....
 

amador

A-List Customer
Messages
372
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10,232, busy girl.
I didn't go to grampa's funeral, didn't want to create another scene. I stood out In the rain just close enough to hear the 21gun salute and taps. After all it was Grandpa that had given me my first Fedora, it held up pretty good in that rain. Have Sopie pour me one and I'll tell you about Grampa and the RAF.
 
Messages
13,467
Location
Orange County, CA
OOh i like this thread, can i be the wildly appropriate old aunty who arrives at parties in extravagant hats, with a hip flask in her handbag and who teaches all her nieces and nephews how to swear in several different languages??

How about Aunty's gramophone Sunday sing along in the parlor? Can't forget that! ;)

Cicely Courtneidge -- We'll All Go Riding On A Rainbow (1933)
featured, appropriately enough, in the film Aunt Sally :)

[video=youtube;5gjjTatHStc]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5gjjTatHStc[/video]
 
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Cricket

Practically Family
Messages
520
Location
Mississippi
I can be the cousin who drops in from time to time. Unsure still of where I fit in, I mingle from room to room, grabbing a snack until someone approaches me. But being the reporter, constantly is greeted by relatives who end every conversation with "the reporter is here," "you gotta watch what you say, she'll write a column about it," or what's happening in town."

Wait a minute, that's just happened at my own house this week. :)
 

amador

A-List Customer
Messages
372
Location
Locum Tenens
Grampa was a war hero, joined the RAF before US got into the war. Got shot down behind enemy lines. Rescued by Soviet agents from POW camp. Spent the rest of the war going from town to town. Told me that the Jerries wouldn't bust in if you were in the middle of getting it on. So he was able to elude capture by bedding sympathetic partisan babes across Europe. Grandma had no idea. He ended upwith a tattoo of a Balanese dancer across his chest, never talked about it.
He was faking symptoms so that the VA would give him more medicine , at no cost to him. He had been selling the extra meds to some pals who actually needed it. Cousin Jack found out and was blackmailing him for a cut from his social security check and his VA bennies. Jack started to take bigger cuts until Grandpa was selling his blood pressure meds for grocery money. Grandma found out and started giving him half of her meds. Uncontrolled blood pressure caused micro strokes leading to vascular dementia in Grandpa and eventually to heart failure in Grandma. I tried to help, too late.
 
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