My "Wonderful" Life

[sheeplady]

Thanks sheeplady!
My bank is Chase. The Fraud Department did not want to speak to me on the phone "because of how strange this situation is" (their words), so I have been directed to go to my local branch in person today and rehash the entire store, and then it will be up to them to file a claim. The only thing in my favor is that I am friendly with my branch manager so hopefully she has enough pull to get this thing going.
Feeling like a failure in life is hard enough, but then being made to feel that I was somehow responsible for this theft is just a little much.

You're not responsible for this, and the employee who you spoke to on the phone wasn't doing their job by suggesting it was you. There are a hundred different ways they could have said, "You need to go to your local bank. Unfortunately we can't help you over the phone in this case, because with a breach of security, your local branch can identify you." It really angers me for your situation- it was unprofessional and lacking in humanity. I'm hoping your local branch is easier to work with; in my experience knowing the branch manager is very helpful in these kinds of cases.

Regardless of how this works out, you need to report Chase the the NYS AG, if only for the sake of others who are probably getting badly treated too. I'd recommend no matter what they tell you to follow the instructions on the federal website for reporting identity theft- you don't need these jerks racking up credit cards in your name.

I've never dealt with Chase and unfortunately I don't have any contacts on the customer banking side of things that could help you. I know people who work in other departments at the parent company, but with large corporations like this they might as well be separate organizations. Perhaps someone else here works at Chase, or has a family member/ friend who works at Chase- hopefully high enough up to make some calls. We're a big enough community we might get lucky.

You're not a failure in life. Seriously. I've known people who are failures in life, and they are people who checked out a long time ago and stopped caring about anyone (including themselves, but also their family, friends, etc.). You still really care, which is why you feel so badly. The suggestion for the Employee Assistance Program is a good one- they can help you not only with counselling but with other things as well.

Also, I know that you said that you aren't considering suicide, but if you feel like things are getting out of control, please call one of the national suicide hotlines. This is not worth taking your life over. They are monitored 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. The nationalHope Hotline is: 1-800-784-2433. The National Suicide Prevention Network is 1-800-273-8255. If you're considering hurting yourself, the best thing to do is to call one of these numbers.

Again, there are tons of people who are thinking about you. Please let us know how you're doing.

 

[AmateisGal]

So sorry you're dealing with all of this, flat top! Like Scott said, things will get better - hang in there.

 

[Tango Yankee]

Flat-Top,

I'm sorry to hear of all this happening to you. I've not had the same sort of situation that you or Scott have had to deal with, but I do know from experience that while a series of blows can knock you down with help you can get back up again. There are some good words of advice here, and I'm glad that you'll be able to discuss the identity theft with a Chase representative that actually knows you and won't assume you perpetrated your own ID theft. (That bit sounds like Chase trying to avoid their own culpability here.) Take it one step at a time. It takes time, but as others have assured you, it gets better.

Please remember to take care of yourself. You mentioned a 20-hour shift--those are rough! I don't know what kind of work you do that requires such, and family obligations and having to be awake and available to deal with the ID fraud will interfer with getting rest, but it's very important that you do continue to eat well and do your best to get enough rest. Just being physically exhausted from lack of sleep can be enough to make everything look hopeless. It certainly interferes with being able to view things objectively.

The best of luck to you in a quick resolution of the ID fraud and the return of your funds, as well as for your job hunt. And remember, you're one of the Good Guys out there.

Take care,
Tom

 

[flat-top]

Thanks to all of my wonderful friends out there! You all earned your wings in my book!
I have some very good news! The staff at the bank were INCREDIBLE!! They never once even questioned my story and instantly assured me that it would be rectified. Even they were perplexed at how easily my account was compromised; apparently when you have a "low risk" account, the security questions are faily easy to answer. For example, not "What is your Social Security Number?", but "What state was your Social Security Number issued?".
Crazy. It seems that all the theives may have actually had was my debit card number.
I can happily report that the funds have already been restored!
On the other hand, the job situation actually got worse today. I recieved 2 phone calls from my superior: the first to tell me that I would be documented for working too many hours (as if I actually wanted to do that), and the second call was to berate me and tell me that I was "unfit" for my position. I'm not sure if I will last the week at this point, which may be exactly what they want.
I did have some contact with another employer today that may turn into something. Keep me in your prayers guys!

 

[Touchofevil]

Thanks to all of my wonderful friends out there! You all earned your wings in my book!
I have some very good news! The staff at the bank were INCREDIBLE!! They never once even questioned my story and instantly assured me that it would be rectified. Even they were perplexed at how easily my account was compromised; apparently when you have a "low risk" account, the security questions are faily easy to answer. For example, not "What is your Social Security Number?", but "What state was your Social Security Number issued?".
Crazy. It seems that all the theives may have actually had was my debit card number.
I can happily report that the funds have already been restored!
On the other hand, the job situation actually got worse today. I recieved 2 phone calls from my superior: the first to tell me that I would be documented for working too many hours (as if I actually wanted to do that), and the second call was to berate me and tell me that I was "unfit" for my position. I'm not sure if I will last the week at this point, which may be exactly what they want.
I did have some contact with another employer today that may turn into something. Keep me in your prayers guys!

Congratulation on your financial situation's rectification! Try to focus on one problem at a time and you will find that life tends to work itself out for the better. And remember baby steps and patience are essential to attaining success. Best of luck!

 

[AmateisGal]

Thanks to all of my wonderful friends out there! You all earned your wings in my book!
I have some very good news! The staff at the bank were INCREDIBLE!! They never once even questioned my story and instantly assured me that it would be rectified. Even they were perplexed at how easily my account was compromised; apparently when you have a "low risk" account, the security questions are faily easy to answer. For example, not "What is your Social Security Number?", but "What state was your Social Security Number issued?".
Crazy. It seems that all the theives may have actually had was my debit card number.
I can happily report that the funds have already been restored!
On the other hand, the job situation actually got worse today. I recieved 2 phone calls from my superior: the first to tell me that I would be documented for working too many hours (as if I actually wanted to do that), and the second call was to berate me and tell me that I was "unfit" for my position. I'm not sure if I will last the week at this point, which may be exactly what they want.
I did have some contact with another employer today that may turn into something. Keep me in your prayers guys!

flat-top, I can't tell you how happy I am for you that your finances were restored! Whew! What a sigh of relief for you!

Y'know, maybe leaving that job is exactly what you need to do in order to move on to better things. Will keep you in my prayers.

 

[rue]

I'm so sorry Flat-top.... all I can do is offer you a hug :hug: and wish you the best.

 

[Sharpsburg]

Flat top - Even those who hate the evil "obamacare" can now benefit from it by being able to change jobs and keep insurance even with pre-existing conditions. If you are keeping the bad job because of your child having a preexisting condition, you may be able to keep insurance AND change jobs, so that may make your decision easier.

Just a thought!

 

[sheeplady]

I am so glad to hear that your funds were restored! Thank goodness.

Sorry to hear about the job. Keep your eyes open and your network informed that you're looking. I hope the best for you!

 

[Carl Miller]

I have been watching this thread. We have a great community of people here willing to help a "stranger" on the other side of the country.

flat-top, I will keep you and yours in my thoughts. There are any number of cliche sayings I could post but I'll spare you except for this one which has helped me get through the rough times.

"If you're going through hell, keep going." - Winston Churchill

 

[flat-top]

"If you're going through hell, keep going." - Winston Churchill

Very wise words there.
I'm literally taking each day one hour at a time. Living in fear is no way to live, and I've been living this way for months. I've tried to correct my situation, but my staff is not equiped to assist me.
I'm not perfect--maybe I actually am "unfit" for my position, but then under my circumstances, I'm not sure who would be "fit". Blood, sweat and tears is not enough.

 

[Feraud]

It's great to read the stolen funds in your account will be recovered!
One way or the other your work situation will be resolved. I'd guess most of us have employment horror stories. I know I do! One day you will look back on this and, if not laugh, take a life lesson from it.
I've learned as much from bad supervisors as I have from good ones.
Hang in there!

 

[BigFitz]

Glad to hear your bank situation has been resolved! About a dozen years ago I was seriously considering leaving my job because of the boss just being an unbelieveable jerk. However, one day I came to work and the boss was gone. Retired without a word. So we got a new boss who wasn't a complete jerk and things got better. Hang in there, things will work out for you.

 

[Benny Holiday]

Hey buddy, I missed this thread earlier. You're a much-loved, valued and highly esteemed part of our world. We're all thinking of you and praying for you. I've been through similar rough patches and I have some good friends who have too, especially with scumbag employers who treated them with undeserved rudeness, so I can empathise with you big-time. Stay true to yourself and your family (I couldn' t imagine you doing anyhting else) and know that we're all behind you.

 

[Mr. Hallack]

It almost seems like your boss is doing this just to see you squirm. I've had shitty bosses and I believe your situation 100%, but he/she almost sound like something from a weird movie or something. This is what I would do (I am NOT saying you should do this, but I don't know anything else to do) Stop showing fear or being subservience to them) When you meet with them and they have their list of complaints about you, causually look at them, say "OK, what do you want me to do about this? What I am doing is obviously not good enough for you, despite me putting in 110% in my end. YOU tell me!!" Be very calm, but direct and very direct, take notes too, written notes. At that point they may fire you. And you may have to collect unemployment and get state medicare, but depending on NY state rules, might be easier to get than if you quit the job. You may also qualify quickly since your in the process of looking for another job. I've had to do this myself, and i know people don't want to ask for help legitimetly because of pride issues. For me, taking care of my family any way I could means a lot more than worrying about what what others think of me cause "I'm on welfare" Screw them!! Taking care of family comes first.

I hope you find something else for work quickly, when you do rub it into your boss's face, what he's gonna do, FIRE YOU?? And I am happy the bank situation is cleared up, but get your self to another bank pronto, one a little more secure!!

 

[Flicka]

Very wise words there.
I'm literally taking each day one hour at a time. Living in fear is no way to live, and I've been living this way for months. I've tried to correct my situation, but my staff is not equiped to assist me.
I'm not perfect--maybe I actually am "unfit" for my position, but then under my circumstances, I'm not sure who would be "fit". Blood, sweat and tears is not enough.

I'm glad your bank seems sensible after all. As for your work situation, I feel for you. I've been there too, and yes, you are right, living in fear is no way to live. I really hope you hang in there until the situation's resolved itself, one way or another, and that a few months from now you will look back and think "pheew, so glad I'm not in that place anymore!"

 

[sheeplady]

Just as an FYI, you can only collect unemployment if you are let go/ laid off because of no fault of your own. If your supervisor can come up with a reason (fault or cause) for firing you, you cannot collect unemployment. If you get "terminated for cause" that means you have been fired for a specific cause related to misconduct on the job, which could include talking back to your boss or really anything that can be labeled that way. If you outright quit, you cannot collect unemployment.

It's a fine point, but if your boss has it in for you and has the right connections, it's very easy to get HR to go along with a ruling of misconduct, especially since the company can have to pay more unemployment tax if their reserve is low due to laying off lots of people, giving them motivation to "fire" rather than "lay off" as many people as possible. Granted, the weight is on the employer to prove that you were terminated for cause (normally at a hearing) but that is an extra stressor people don't need and there is always a chance they can be proven to be correct.

Even if you do get unemployment, you don't automatically get health care benefits and COBRA can hideously expensive depending upon where you work and how much your former company will pay for you- you can be required to pay over 100% of the entire cost of the plan or just your premiums, which is a wide gap.

Now, of course, most places don't just fire people on whims. But given the economy and the irate stupidity of flat-top's boss, I can understand why he is hesitant to say anything to his boss, as anything he did could be misconstrued as misconduct. (I am speaking about NYS, just to clarify, although it is similar in other states as well.)

 

[flat-top]

It simply incredible how crazy life can be and how things can change in an instant. I can't believe that I am even typing this, but I got a job offer today and accepted!!! It's MORE money and LESS hours!! I submitted my resignation with no notice (that company does not accept 2 week notices. Shocking, huh?) and I start the new job on Monday!!!!!! My staff was in tears, but they totally support me and understand.
I really want to thank my Fedora Lounge family for all your positive vibes and support. This little thread saw me go from the lowest of lows to my current state of euphoria. It all happened so quickly, but when you are so far down, you really can't see any glimmer of hope.
Well you guys did, and I thank you with all my heart!

 

[lolly_loisides]

Wonderful news flat top. Congratulations.

 

[sheeplady]

That is just so wonderful! I am glad things are working out for you!