Movies you wished you had never watched.

[1961MJS]

...It's why I'm always skeptical of film-adaptations of books. They're never as good.

Television adaptations of books (or book-series) are often much better.

Hi

There's good points and bad about that. If you read the James Bond books, then watch the movies, you have twice the plot since the movies "based" on the books don't follow the book (at all in a few cases). "The Spy Who Loved Me" was the furthest from the book, both were worth the trouble, but COMPLETELY different.

I work with a guy whose son is one of the "stars" of "Darkness, the Vampire Version" labeled as the bloodiest horror movie of all time. Budget of $5,000.00. Unfortunately its being re-released, but the stars, director, and producer aren't getting any of the money because they didn't copyright it.

Later

 

[ButteMT61]

"Bag of Bones" episode 1/2 last night. Not awful, not great. Brosnan does a typical Brosnan job. We'll watch part 2 tonight...

I'd wager most books are better than the films. "Water For Elephants" was an awesome book, and a so-so movie. Pretty typical. Sometimes a movie is better - I really liked the last "Girl With The Dragon Tattoo" movie better than the books or original films (sorry, I know I'm not the majority there)

 

[LizzieMaine]

Of all the movies I've screened over the years, the one that annoyed and irritated me the most was "Babel." Three hours of talk talk talk without a thing to say.

 

[fortworthgal]

Seven. We were all disturbed walking out of the theater that night. Wished that we saw A Walk in the Clouds instead.

I completely agree with you about Seven, but I don't know that A Walk in the Clouds was much better. Less disturbing, yes, but hardly worth the price of admission (I saw both films in the theater.)

I dunno, even in my small town school, I was pretty well schooled in the birds in the bees by 7 or 8 years old.

All too well do I remember the day I came home from first grade having learned to flip the bird, and - not fully realizing the implications - proceeded to show my mother and older sister... in the middle of the grocery store. :lol:

 

[katiesparkles]

"Bag of Bones" episode 1/2 last night. Not awful, not great. Brosnan does a typical Brosnan job. We'll watch part 2 tonight...

I'd wager most books are better than the films. "Water For Elephants" was an awesome book, and a so-so movie. Pretty typical. Sometimes a movie is better - I really liked the last "Girl With The Dragon Tattoo" movie better than the books or original films (sorry, I know I'm not the majority there)

The thing with BOB is that they just left out a LOT of the things from the book, but to be fair, it would have just been a lot more "nothing" adding to a possible 3rd episode. There already was enough of that "Pierce sitting at his desk, thinking" or "Pierce pacing through the kitchen", and that's just because the book has a lot of inner monologues or stuff you just can't put on screen. At least in my opinion, and I'm probably biased too

Thank you. I knew there was a fairly recent movie that I couldn't think of that fit this category. In fact, I didn't even see it. Some of my teenage staff were talking about it at camp this summer. When I got more than an inkling of what it was about, and the graphic nature of what was shown, I told all of them that I didn't even want it discussed in my presence. I'm fairly easy-going, but that was over my edge.

Yeah, I didn't expect it to be as... straight foward.. as it was myself. Though maybe it would just show the "thing" for a total of 5 minutes max, near the end... but oooooh no: 25 minutes in and then it's just that for another hour or so. Ugh.

Oh, I thought of another one: The Haunted Airman. I WANT MY ALMOST TWO HOURS BACK.
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0810892/

 

[Mocheman]

I saw The Phantom Menace at the first midnight showing. I actually waited on line for half a day just to get tickets for my brother and I.(We were that excited) When the movie ended there was not a word spoken and everybody sort of looking around wondering what had just happened. I've never experienced that at a movie before or since. Usually when something is crap there is talk afterwords about how bad it was but this was stunned silence. People just filed out of the theater and made their way home.

After hearing all the hoopla made about The Wild Bunch over the years I decided to borrow my brother's dvd and give it a watch. What a disappointment it was. Probably one of the most overrated films I've seen.

 

[AtomicEraTom]

Oh, my. I bet that went over well!

All too well do I remember the day I came home from first grade having learned to flip the bird, and - not fully realizing the implications - proceeded to show my mother and older sister... in the middle of the grocery store. :lol:

 

[V.C. Brunswick]

For me it would be almost any "blockbuster" film. The more hyped it is the greater the disappointment factor.

 

[Bluebird Marsha]

I saw The Phantom Menace at the first midnight showing. I actually waited on line for half a day just to get tickets for my brother and I.(We were that excited) When the movie ended there was not a word spoken and everybody sort of looking around wondering what had just happened. I've never experienced that at a movie before or since. Usually when something is crap there is talk afterwords about how bad it was but this was stunned silence. People just filed out of the theater and made their way home.'...

You weren't in a theater in New Mexico by any chance? Because that was the exact same reaction that happened. We were all just so excited, and when the end came... I don't think there's a word in the English language to describe it. "I was supposed to have enjoyed that. Is it just me? Did everyone but me like it?" *Look at the rest of audience*No, they don't look happy either. Dang. I need a drink." For what it's worth, I saw an action figure of Jar-jar encased in carbonite. I don't think it was Lucas approved.

Near the top of my list of movies I wish I had skipped is Gettysburg. The Killer Angels is one of my favorite books, and prior to seeing that film I complained loudly and bitterly about movies that cut out chunks of books. After Gettysburg, I have never uttered that complaint. Four hours long from a thin book. I could've watched the movie, had the book in my hand, and slooowwwly turned each page, matching age by page to scene by scene. It was excruciating.

Most of the actors- uggh. Stupid beards, stilted dialogue, repeated panning shots of cannon going off, filmed from different directions. Close-up of Ted Turner as a Confederate, dying. AND, I know with that many extras needed, the reenacting community would be involved, but maybe they should've found men under the age of 50 for closeup shots. I did Civil War reenacting at the time. At least I could play "spot the people I know".

Maybe I'm still a little bitter

Two exceptions, the actors playing General Pickett and General Armistead- Stephen Lang and Richard Jordan. I thought they were marvelous! Sometimes I think about watching Gods and Generals, just to watch Lang play Stonewall Jackson, but I twitch whenever I start to reach for the DVD.

 

[Edward]

I saw The Phantom Menace at the first midnight showing. I actually waited on line for half a day just to get tickets for my brother and I.(We were that excited) When the movie ended there was not a word spoken and everybody sort of looking around wondering what had just happened. I've never experienced that at a movie before or since. Usually when something is crap there is talk afterwords about how bad it was but this was stunned silence. People just filed out of the theater and made their way home.

Star Wars truly died for me the day Greedo shot first, but any potential I even had to enjoy the untampered with originals was destroyed by this rubbish. I saw it twice in the cinema. I had low expectations, very low, but still booked two screenings in advance - not midnight ones, though. A couple of days in so as to avoid the sort of hardcore fanboy that would watch three hours of a five minute video game clip and proclaim it genius because it was George Lucas' offering. Truly dreadful... I only went back the second time because I'd already paid - I still regret doing that. Should have just written off the money. Awful stuff. I ended up also seeing the second episode a couple of years later as a friend of my then girlfriend wanted to go for her birthday. I wish I'd found an excuse not to, as it was even worse. Still not seen the third one, and no desire to. Actually, there is a cinema five minutes from my house: at the time the third one came out I could have seen it there for free at any time during its run, and I had no interest. I went to several other things during those weeks, but not the Lucas product.

 

[Chasseur]

Sometimes I think about watching Gods and Generals, just to watch Lang play Stonewall Jackson, but I twitch whenever I start to reach for the DVD.

Wow somehow I had wiped Gods and Generals from my mind... While Gettysburg is far from perfect, and I do not think it was a good movie, it does have the dubious saving grace of being better than Gods and Generals. I remember dragging my wife to see that in a theater and is the only time I've heard an usher tell the audience at intermission, "Sorry folks its not over yet, you've got another hour or more..." Again Stephen Lang was good as Stonewall Jackson, but the rest of the movie... yech...

 

[Bluebird Marsha]

Ouch! Thanks for the heads up. It never crossed my mind that "G & G" could be worse.

Did I mention the bad Southern accents? The accents were atrocious. I've never heard anything even approaching a resemblance to those accents.

Oh, did I mention that I'm still bitter?

 

[Chasseur]

It never crossed my mind that "G & G" could be worse.

Oh yes... how about bad CGI, bad script, wooden dialogue, bad editing and camera work, and perhaps worst of all a obviously older and more rotund Jeff Daniels playing a supposedly younger Col. Chamberlain while channeling high school Shakespeare while having a long reading of Caesar crossing the Rubicon?

At the 40 second mark when they are supposedly looking over the river valley at the town the matting of the CGI is so bad it looks like they are about to give a weather report...

I think it took my wife about three years to forgive me for dragging her to this in the theatre...

[video=youtube;CtEzSn40SEw]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CtEzSn40SEw[/video]

 

[frussell]

I couldn't get past the first 30 minutes of Gods and Generals. Nothing makes my skin crawl like fake southern accents, unless it's Americans doing fake British/Irish/Australian accents. On the other hand, I might sit through G&G again before I'd re-watch "J. Edgar." All the comments in that thread about crummy makeup were spot on. I kept waiting for some of those kids from "Jackass" to come in on their Rascal scooters wearing fake old-folks makeup. Tolson's character had such spectacularly overdone makeup my wife got the giggles, which spread to me. I love Eastwood-directed films usually, and like Leo and Naomi very much, but this one made me want to contact Movies On Demand and get my money back. Maybe Clint's eyesight is going, that could be the only explanation for such shoddy work getting past him. I could have possibly overlooked the amateur special effects if the story had been better. A waste of a complex subject, and a superb cast, right down to the extras. I kept getting the feeling that Eastwood wanted to make his own "Brokeback Mountain," but with old makeup left over from Captain Kirk-era Star Trek villains. Just my opinion, surely others loved it. Frank

 

[Romy Overdorp]

Oh how I wish I had never seen Jackass the movie....
The things you do when you're a kid :eusa_doh:

 

[MisterCairo]

OFF TOPIC:

I've always thought Gwyneth Paltrow in "Emma" and Renee Zellweger in Bridget Jones's Diary did well, along with Jennifer Ehle in Pride and Prejudice and Gillian Anderson in Bleak House.

Now, Dick Van Dyke in anything by Disney, THAT is cringe-worthy!

Nothing makes my skin crawl like fake southern accents, unless it's Americans doing fake British/Irish/Australian accents.

 

[frussell]

Gillian Anderson spent at least seven or eight years of her childhood in England, if I recall, so she gets a pass. Same with Jennifer Ehle. We'll have to agree to disagree on Zellweger. We are in definite agreement on poor old Dick Van Dyke. I'd still rather watch "Mary Poppins" than see "J.Edgar" again, though. Frank

 

[Widebrim]

Gillian Anderson spent at least seven or eight years of her childhood in England, if I recall, so she gets a pass. Same with Jennifer Ehle. We'll have to agree to disagree on Zellweger. We are in definite agreement on poor old Dick Van Dyke. I'd still rather watch "Mary Poppins" than see "J.Edgar" again, though. Frank

Jennifer Ehle was fantastic in P & P, and she did spend part of her youth in England.

On the subject of Jane Austen, I wish that I had never seen "Lost in Austen." Ridiculous take on P & P, with Darcy falling in love with a 21st century Londoner who is culture-less and constantly uses the word "bloody." In addition, Bingley runs off (temporarily) with Lydia, Mr. Collins marries Jane, Mr. Wickham is actually a good guy, and Miss Bingley turns out to be a lesbian...Worse than the P & P version with Keira Knightley.

 

[Chasseur]

Worse than the P & P version with Keira Knightley.

ohh that's got to be bad...

 

[Atomic Age]

What year was that? Interesting... I've never known Starbucks as anything other than a corporate giant. Sure looks like one in the film, but that could be retrospective, I suppose.

Starbucks was started by 3 teachers in Seattle in 1971, and was considered the little guys who were trying to make good coffee. They didn't build a Starbucks outside of Seattle until 1988. The first Starbucks outside of the U.S. was built in 1996 in Tokyo, Japan, and didn't enter the U.K. market until 1998.

The ironic part is that Starbucks makes some of the WORST coffee every made by the hand of man! I mean I have no idea what it was like when they started, but today they burn the crap out of the beans and just make the worst crap anyone ever drank!

Doug