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Miss, Mrs. or Madam? The demise of Ms?

Solid Citizen

Practically Family
Messages
922
Location
Maryland
Baltimorese

I remember when I came to Maryland over 30 years ago a women at the bank in a beehive hairdo with cat woman glasses called me HON. a term of friendly greeting.

Every year they have Hon Festival in Baltimore to honor the phrase & the stereotypical woman who delivered it & is fast vanishing :(

SC :D
 

carebear

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,220
Location
Anchorage, AK
I like to call women "kitten".

Typically women I know well enough that they won't necessarily like it but won't hit me more than once or twice in retaliation. Thrice if I pop off with an "Ow, kitten has claws."

Typically I wear them down and they grow to appreciate it, or at least get tired of hitting me, which is close enough in my book. lol
 

carebear

My Mail is Forwarded Here
Messages
3,220
Location
Anchorage, AK
Because I dig Ann Margaret. <duh> :D

Like I said, not to strangers, friendly acquaintances at worst.

Most people end up with pet names throughout life, women get called "baby", "honey" and such all the time. "Kitten" is throwing a change up.

Given the only reference most people have of it, Ms. Margaret in Elvis flicks, it denotes sexy, sassy and not to be taken lightly. Nobody called Ann Margaret "kitten" as a diminuative.
 

Chef

New in Town
Messages
2
Location
New Mexico
Always Maam and Sir

Howdy, New her and this is my first post. I was always brought up by my parents to refere to anyone you do not know, anyone who is older, or anyone you wish to show respect to with either Sir or Maam. i have gotten hollered at a few times by women that are in their 20's and 30's for doing it. I swear I meant it as respect, no I swear you do not look old, ow please stop hitting me. :eek:fftopic: I do hope to get to know all of you on heresoon and well.
 

VaderSS

New in Town
Messages
17
Location
Houston, TX
Back when I was waiting tables, I called every woman miss. The ones who needed to be called miss, did not mind, and the ones that were more properly called maam enjoyed it, being treated as younger. The ones more properly called mum or grandma always smiled real big at beeing called miss. I always flirted with them as well. Nothing better than seeing an elderly woman acting like she was 18 again.
 

MrNewportCustom

Call Me a Cab
Messages
2,265
Location
Outer Los Angeles
Miss, Mrs. or Madam?

Where have they gone?

While watching The Solid Gold Cadillac (1956) on TCM, today, Laura Partridge (Judy Holliday), is called "Madam." She responds by standing up and saying, "I'm not a Madam, I'm a Miss." That line got me to thinking: Where have these gender-specific titles for women gone? Have they become obsolete? Have they fallen victim to political correctness? The Internet?

In the late '60s and well into the '70s (as I remember the time frame) many women were requesting, if not demanding, that they be referred to as "Ms." rather that Miss or Mrs. Now it's rare to hear any titles at all, except in billing statements, if even then.

Are gender-specific titles for women disappearing, or am I just not as observant as I used to be?

And one more question: I know what Miss, Mrs. and Ms. mean, but what, exactly, is "Madam"? (No, I'm not asking about the woman who runs a brothel.) And how about "Ma'am"?


Lee
 

Gingerella72

A-List Customer
Messages
428
Location
Nebraska, USA
We've become such a casual society that the only place I'm aware of where gender titles are still used faithfully is in school, by students addressing teachers. Or by telemarketers.

I think most people think of it as prissy or old fashioned. I know a lot of women who get mad when people call them "ma'am" because they say it makes them feel old. They don't see it as a sign of respect, they see it as an insult.
 

Inky

One Too Many
Messages
1,743
Location
State of Confusion AKA California
I prefer the use of Miss, Mrs. or Ma'am. I never did much care for "Ms." but I know that some women do prefer it. When I worked in the banking system from 1980 to 1997, that was the salutation I used with female customers and co-workers alike, unless we were on a first-name basis.

Now I transcribe for a city official department, and I do notice they commonly use sir, ma'am, Mr. and Miss/Mrs. when referring to their co-workers, subordinates and supervisors alike. It's rather nice to hear it, actually, because I agree, it's gone mostly by the wayside.

I really don't hear it at all in common everyday encounters now that I think about it.

As for me, I do cringe a bit when called ma'am, because it does make me feel older, but I do appreciate the civility of it. I always use "Mrs." when necessary on any documents.
 

dhermann1

I'll Lock Up
Messages
9,154
Location
Da Bronx, NY, USA
Back about 1800 any woman who was emancipated, in other words responsible for herself, was called Mrs. A single lady setting up to be a school marm, or something along those lines, would advertise herself as Mrs. So Miss and Mrs. were the equivalent of Master and Mister. We hardly ever hear the word Master used to describe a little boy any more, but until maybe the 60's it was still quite common.
Of course the contraction Mrs. stands for Mistress, as in the Mistress of a household. How the word got its more illicit implication I don't know, just another irony of language.
Personally I've always found the term Ms. to be awkward and annnoying. I've always thought it made much more sense for adult women who were emancipated members of society to style themselves as Mrs.
I think keeping the term Mrs. only to married women perpetuates the concept of wives as property.
Madame is a French word, meaning "my lady". You use it to speak to a woman you assume to be an adult. As in "Madame, I'm Adam." I think Ma'am is a totally proper equivalent. When you talk to the Queen of England, the preferred form of address is "Ma'am".
It's a dicey issue tho whether using "Miss" or "Madame" would be appropriate at all times in direct address. Over the last 200 years that old usage of Mrs. has become so extinct that Miss is proper fior a single woman. I mean you can call a woman Ms Smith, but you would never say, "Oh, Ms, you dropped your hanky."
So there you are.
 

Caity Lynn

Practically Family
Messages
579
Location
USA
I call everyone Mr. or Mrs. or Miss or Ms. Depending if I know their marital status, until instructed not to. Likewise with ma'am. "Caity please pick that up" "yes, ma'am." It's now I was raised. Now once I get on a good basis, it drops, because I'm their friend but still....

I dated a boy from Texas once, He said yes ma'am, no ma'am, opened doors was very polite. Even while talking to me, he would occasionally say yes ma'am, it's drilled into him.

I also know a middle aged man, who's friends with my parents, he refers to me as ma'am, even though I'm only 16. I answer the phone and he says "how're you ma'am." simply because I'm female, It's sweet.
 

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