Love at first sight? What Balloney!!...or, does it really happen?

[Feraud]

Honestly speaking, isn't the term more accurately lust at first sight?

The only thing you can ever feel love for on sight is the birth of a child.

Everything else is lust, expectation, hope, etc.

 

[Baron Kurtz]

I think this thread implicitly points to the problem with English having only one word for "love." People can say, with a straight face, "I love my wife," "I love my dog," "I love my car," and "I love The Beatles." The Greeks had four words for love: eros, philia, agape, storge. When people talk about love at first sight, I think they are refering to "eros" or romantic love. I believe that this sort of love at first sight happens all the time. However, it is a fleeting sort of "love"; I think that many people have lost sight of the distinction between different kinds of love, and especially between romantic love and conjugal love; the former lasts only briefly, but the latter has the potential to last until death. I think it's absurd to suggest that someone can have conjugal love at first sight; but eros at first sight is another thing altogether.

An excellent point, and the reason i only use the word love in connection with the Baroness. I like the fact that English only really has the one word. It allows the realisation - for me at least - that i've only loved one person, though i've felt attachments to others, love is going a bit far to describe those other feelings. Interestingly, lust at first sight (almost - i was a little drunk at first sight - and add in a little bit of feeling intrigued by the person) describes quite accurately my initial feelings for the Baroness.

Lust at first sight? Sure thing. But love? Methinks not. It drives me nuts when i hear everyone yelling about "I *love* that guy . . . when in fact they mean they like him.

bk

 

[Baron Kurtz]

Honestly speaking, isn't the term more accurately lust at first sight?

The only thing you can ever feel love for on sight is the birth of a child.

Everything else is lust, expectation, hope, etc.

D*mn you! shakes fist 'cause 'e got in afore me . . .

frank

 

[GOK]

Lust, love, infatuation...call it what you will - for each of us it is different and only the people involved can truly know what is going on. We all view love differently, so why not love at first sight? When all is said and done, it's merely an expression for the effect someone has upon us. Sometimes it is fleeting, sometimes forever but neither is less or more valid an emotion than the other IMO.

 

[scotrace]

Lust. Yes, of course.

But sometimes there is also the sense of connection. Of immediate similarity of wavelength.

Which goes beyond mere want.

 

[Spitfire]

And oh year - I also believe in lust at first sight. It happens.
Again and again. But you get over it.

 

[Classydame]

Lust, love, infatuation...call it what you will - for each of us it is different and only the people involved can truly know what is going on. We all view love differently, so why not love at first sight? When all is said and done, it's merely an expression for the effect someone has upon us. Sometimes it is fleeting, sometimes forever but neither is less or more valid an emotion than the other IMO.

Well said! Thank you!

 

[Feraud]

Unfortunately the term Love is broadly defined by individuals. I have used the term to express feelings towards everything from hats to shoes.

For your consideration. A snippet on the ponderings of Love..

Brick Tamland: I love lamp.

Ron Burgundy: Do you really love the lamp or are you just saying that because you are looking at the lamp?

Brick Tamland: I love lamp.

 

[Ruby Slippers]

And my big romantic move was a post-it note on her cup of coffe saying: "You are the cream in my coffe" That settled it. We were in love...and had been so ever since our first meeting in the COs office.

That is adorable! Post-its are so effective in sending messages of love.
I too met my mister at the workplace. We used to leave post-its at our desks all the time. Its very sweet, and I will always have a special fondness for post-its.

My big move was during an afternoon watching Christopher Walken and Kattan do the Mango sketch on a DVD. I was laughing so hard and suddenly just asked, "will you be my Mango?" We've been calling each other that ever since.

 

[Girl Friday]

There are a lot of words we throw around too easily, that is true! Love and Hate.

The only thing I really hate... pickles!

Most stuff I just have a tremendous dislike for...

 

[Quigley Brown]

I don't belive in love in anyway these days for me..... Never been in love, and don't think that I'll ever be in love [huh]

Naama

Sounds like me. I'm not looking either. What's a real turn-off is that there's a co-worker that obsessed with me. While flattering, it's become almost unbearable. My problem is that I'm too nice a guy and I guess she took that the wrong way. Because of this I don't want to be in love...

 

[Kim_B]

That is adorable! Post-its are so effective in sending messages of love.
I too met my mister at the workplace. We used to leave post-its at our desks all the time. Its very sweet, and I will always have a special fondness for post-its.

Just don't break up via post-it note, a la Sex and the City!

 

[Dr Doran]

It happened to me. I was in the courtyard of a building at my university. She was voluptuous, which I like, and she was wearing a dress -- very unusual for a girl at Berkeley. But there was also something special about her demeanor. We were introduced (by the former flame of mine to whom she was speaking). I was seeing another girl at the time but that ended quickly. We started going out in March of 2002; it was obvious that she felt the same way about me. I proposed to her in July; we were married the following January in the States and then again in June in Europe. And now, to the left, you can see our 3 month old baby, Dominika.

 

[HoosierDaddy]

Love At First Sight. Infactuation.

Jimmy Stewart's character in the movie Shenandoah had something to say reguarding this. It's stuck with me throughout the years. Goes something like this. A young family friend in rebel uniform was soon to leave for duty. He was determined to ask for the hand of Stewart's daughter before his departure. Upon timidly entering Stewart's study...tripping over the footstool...and finally awkwardly taking a seat...Stewart offered him a cigar..brandy..and grinningly asked him what he could do for him. The young man finally blurted out. "Sir..I have come to ask for your daughters hand!" Stewart sat back in his chair and asked "Why do you want to marry my daughter?" "Well,sir,he stuttered,I love her...and have since the first moment I met her". After a pause..Stewart sat back and solemnly stated..."You mean that you are infactuated by her. "But..but,Sir!" Stewart goes on...It was the same with her mother and I. Infactuated by her eyes..her smile..the way she moved..the way she understood...agreed. Son,over the years this infactuation could stumble and yet grow. Through facing the hard times together...good times together...children together..working together..sharing together...growing together....along the way I learned of true love...and then to truely love her.
HD

 

[beaucaillou]

Have you ever just met someone out of the blue, you talk, smile and laugh and something has just clicked and you feel like you are just going to fall into those deep blue eyes and drown, like it was the most natural thing in the world.

Let's hear your thoughts from out there in Fedora Lounge land...

In my experience it happens. For me (and the former he), it happened that way. But as it turns out, love at first sight doen't guarantee compatibility, great partnership, or good communication. All of the other stuff relationships need is just as hard to come by. And instantaneous connection, love, and chemistry are great, but they don't ensure lasting partnership. Not that they can't, just in my experience it didn't. Though, I did go to greater lengths to make it work than I would have for a relationship where that magnituded of a connection didn't exist instantly.

 

[jitterbugdoll]

There have been some great responses to this thread--I'm really enjoying reading what everyone has to say.

As for me, I will say that based on recent happenings, if I had been questioning the idea of "love at first sight," I most certainly am not now

 

[Salv]

Mind you, it was your good self I was sitting next to for most of the evening!!

There's things about me you don't know, Gokkie. Things you wouldn't understand. Things you couldn't understand. Things you shouldn't understand.

You don't want to get mixed up with a guy like me. I'm a loner, Gokkie. A rebel.

 

[Smithy]

It definitely happens!

I can still remember the exact moment of walking into a jazz bar and seeing my future fianc?©e for the first time. I couldn't take my eyes off of her from that moment I first saw her and haven't been able to since.

 

[Harp]

I think this thread implicitly points to the problem with English having only one word for "love." People can say, with a straight face, "I love my wife," "I love my dog," "I love my car," and "I love The Beatles." The Greeks had four words for love: eros, philia, agape, storge. When people talk about love at first sight, I think they are refering to "eros" or romantic love. I believe that this sort of love at first sight happens all the time. However, it is a fleeting sort of "love"; I think that many people have lost sight of the distinction between different kinds of love, and especially between romantic love and conjugal love; the former lasts only briefly, but the latter has the potential to last until death. I think it's absurd to suggest that someone can have conjugal love at first sight; but eros at first sight is another thing altogether.

...yet why consign Eros to flee, and cannot conjugal love also be
immediate and lasting?

 

[Ruby Slippers]

Just don't break up via post-it note, a la Sex and the City!

I love that episode and I hate Jack Berger! lol