"I want to feel like a new man"

[matei]

Apologies if this has been posted previously, but I stumbled upon this article in today's Guardian and found it to be an interesting read.

 

[Miss Golightly]

I hadn't seen this before so thanks for posting - an enjoyable and informative (particularly about mens' suits) read!

 

[Foofoogal]

Pretty much every man would have a tailored suit. In those days, suits were things you bequeathed to your son. So that's why the seams would be so deep and there would be so much cloth that you could get let out. It's exceptional for a son not to be bigger than his dad, so that's why suits were cut so generously."

I love this.

 

[Nick D]

The bit about his grandfather reminds me of my great grandfather, who was a working man but on weekends would dress in his sharpest suit and a pair of gray spats.

 

[rue]

Excellent article! I'm sharing it with my husband tonight

 

[Pompidou]

The kind of guy that stresses about which shaving technique is proper, and about the angle and sniffing techniques for the right drinks for the right situations, and all the technicalities of ones suit - that's not the sort of person I want to be. That makes the article interesting by default, since I read the whole thing. I do whatever comes naturally. I don't think twice. I'm only trying to impress myself. I fear if a person begins to tread the path of this article, he'll lose himself in self doubt, like the author did. The man buys top quality things and rather than being at ease, rather than saying, "Now I look damned good," he feels insecure and spends his time wondering if he's doing it right. Once you start dressing like a million bucks, it seems you have to start behaving like it, and then you're not being yourself, and that's no good at all.

 

[dhermann1]

"I feel like a new man."

Wasn't that Mae West's slogan?

 

[Widebrim]

Wasn't that Mae West's slogan?

Good one, Dan!:lol:

 

[matei]

The kind of guy that stresses about which shaving technique is proper, and about the angle and sniffing techniques for the right drinks for the right situations, and all the technicalities of ones suit - that's not the sort of person I want to be. That makes the article interesting by default, since I read the whole thing. I do whatever comes naturally. I don't think twice. I'm only trying to impress myself. I fear if a person begins to tread the path of this article, he'll lose himself in self doubt, like the author did. The man buys top quality things and rather than being at ease, rather than saying, "Now I look damned good," he feels insecure and spends his time wondering if he's doing it right. Once you start dressing like a million bucks, it seems you have to start behaving like it, and then you're not being yourself, and that's no good at all.

Good points... I think that this happens to some people when they try to affect a major change in their lifestyle. Self doubt does many a person in.

Like you said, you need to impress yourself.

 

[Mike in Seattle]

... I fear if a person begins to tread the path of this article, he'll lose himself in self doubt, like the author did. The man buys top quality things and rather than being at ease, rather than saying, "Now I look damned good," he feels insecure and spends his time wondering if he's doing it right. Once you start dressing like a million bucks, it seems you have to start behaving like it, and then you're not being yourself, and that's no good at all.

I feel he's insecure and a little self-doubting because it's new to him and he's not accustomed to it...yet. Should we do whatever we feel like whenever we feel like it just because we're comfortable doing it? Or do we learn more socially acceptable, more adult ways of traveling through life? I think it's a case of something new to him, like learning table manners - it takes some getting used to new things and ways of the world. Ultimately they become ingrained, another merit badge pinned to our banner of life, and we become more at ease and comfortable with the newly learned skills as we use them more and more.

 

[scottyrocks]

I think easing into it is the key. Do a little at a time. I wouldnt start with a suit that costs as much as a bathroom renovation, either.

 

[SGT Rocket]

When I was a younger man...

When I was a younger man, I didn't care who cared about how I dressed. But now that I'm a little older I realize that people will treat you different depending on how you dress. Plus, I like the rules if you will of dressing well. For me, usually the rules help me A LOT! I have the typical male frame of not too large and not too skinny. However, I may be a little taller than most: 6'3".

Also, dressing nice makes me feel good and put together. Maybe it is a connection with the past that I really enjoy. Wow, men knew how to dress, shave, wash, etc... back in the day. I can do that too. Plus, I'm sure the 300lb guy sitting next to me in coach with flip-flops, shorts, long and greasy hair, and wearing a Grateful Dead T-shirt that is two sizes too small, and hasn't bathed in a month (to save the planet's water), thinks that he is following the rules for his sub-culture, and good for him (true story BTW). But, I don't want to be that guy.

I was sort of a Dead-Head/Phish-Head part of the time I was in college. So, I kind of understand the whole scene thing. But, now, I'm a father of two wonderful children and a beautiful wife. So I want to look good, presentable, and to some extent in-control/powerful in my presentation.

However, the main thing is, I want to look nice and project a gentlemanly, manly, authoritative figure in public for my wife (and children). My wife deserves to have a husband who, when he goes out in public, is well presented and may turn the head or two of the fairer sex. Does it help my self esteem to dress in a suite and tie and look nice? You bet. Maybe it is my flaw/vanity, or maybe it is a life of military service that makes me want to look "put together" but that is how I like it.

Some may consider me a victim of mainstream societies brainwashing or whatever. But, isn't one man's brainwashing another man's socialization?

 

[JimWagner]

However, the main thing is, I want to look nice and project a gentlemanly, manly, authoritative figure in public for my wife (and children). My wife deserves to have a husband who, when he goes out in public, is well presented and may turn the head or two of the fairer sex. Does it help my self esteem to dress in a suite and tie and look nice? You bet. Maybe it is my flaw/vanity, or maybe it is a life of military service that makes me want to look "put together" but that is how I like it.

Some may consider me a victim of mainstream societies brainwashing or whatever. But, isn't one man's brainwashing another man's socialization?

Looking around me at what the mainstream wears today I'd say you've avoided its brainwashing.

 

[Nick D]

Shaving the right way does make a big difference. I have a cowlick in my beard under my jaw, so I know all about the value of shaving with the grain, and it holds true whether you've spent £0.50 or £200 on your razor.

 

[Mr_D.]

Great article.

 

[martinsantos]

Very interesting article.

Of course he choosed the a very expensive taylor, something I think I would never do. But the meanings inside, about been with a suit, etc, is very interesting.

I never will understand why you can't today go to the theater, or movies, with a suit - as this would be an office uniform.

 

[W-D Forties]

When my husband hit 40 a couple of years ago he went through a similar thing - sick of dressing like a teenager, looking a bit weird in T shirts with a bald head, finding trainers infantile - so he decided to completely reassess his view of how a 'man' should dress. He now had a lovely large handlebar moustache (ladies have stopped him in the street to say 'ding'dong'!), wears a lot of tweed, all of his trousers have braces and of course he always wears a hat. He also has a a couple of beautifully tailored tweed suits that are definitely NOT office wear.
Does he look his age - yes, and perhaps a few years older, BUT he dresses like a man, not an overgrown toddler.

 

[Widebrim]

However, the main thing is, I want to look nice and project a gentlemanly, manly, authoritative figure in public for my wife (and children). My wife deserves to have a husband who, when he goes out in public, is well presented and may turn the head or two of the fairer sex. Does it help my self esteem to dress in a suite and tie and look nice? You bet. Maybe it is my flaw/vanity, or maybe it is a life of military service that makes me want to look "put together" but that is how I like it.

Problem is, GI, that society (including those of us on the FL) cannot agree to what "gentlemanly, manly, authoritative" means today. To many, using the phrase "authoritative," especially in the context of the husband/wife relationship, is considered oppressive and manipulative. But I digress...Point is, if your wife wants the kind of man that you seem to indicate she desires, then you are right on the money. I was in the service, too, and combining that with having a father who never stopped "dressing" up when going out socially with my mother, I'm in your camp.

 

[Widebrim]

:eusa_clap

Does he look his age - yes, and perhaps a few years older, BUT he dresses like a man, not an overgrown toddler.

And that is just what so many men today just do not get...

 

[SGT Rocket]

Thanks for the support Widebrim. I love your second quote in your signature line too!

Also, I must agree that I really appreciate it when men and women dress age appropriately.