I cheated! And with a co-worker whom I like BETTER! What to do?!

[PrettySquareGal]

I have been with my current hair stylist for a few years. I was happy with her for a while but the last few cuts I haven't loved. I thought about finding a new one, but the last time I went through that kind of transition I ended up with someone who gave me a mullet. :eeek: So I'm not very confident about striking out on my own that way.

So last week, I'll call her "O", cut my hair and this time I was downright unhappy (I never really know until I get home and wash & style for a few days). I decided to call her and see if she could redo it, and maybe she could make it right. She wasn't available but another stylist was. Rather than wait for "O" to return in a couple of days I had "G" cut and style my hair.

Wow!

She is so much nicer. She spent twice as long with me. I am thrilled with the cut!

But they work in the same salon!!!

Is there a graceful way for me to break up with "O" and start seeing "G"?

 

[crwritt]

I'd say, its your hair and your wallet. If "G" does it better, more to your liking, stay with her. No need to explain.
"G" may have spent more time with you to steal you away from "O", and guess what? It worked.

 

[C-dot]

Ooo... This is a tough one.

The way I see it, you either have to tell "O" straight and risk hurting her feelings, or avoid her and see "G" when "O" isn't there. Unless they work the same set hours, that's probably your option.

If you're going to tell "O" straight, though, you might say that "G" worked out an excellent new style for you with her individual technique, and you'd like "G" to do it for you as long as you're wearing this style, and it's certainly not a reflection of "O's" talent. If necessary, tell "O" that you'll be coming back to her once you're ready for a change (a little white lie never hurt anyone.)

Of course, if neither will work, perhaps ask "G" if she can recommend a stylist at another salon.

 

[PrettySquareGal]

I'd say, its your hair and your wallet. If "G" does it better, more to your liking, stay with her. No need to explain.
"G" may have spent more time with you to steal you away from "O", and guess what? It worked.

Good points!

 

[PrettySquareGal]

If you're going to tell "O" straight, though, you might say that "G" worked out an excellent new style for you with her individual technique, and you'd like "G" to do it for you as long as you're wearing this style, and it's certainly not a reflection of "O's" talent. If necessary, tell "O" that you'll be coming back to her once you're ready for a change (a little white lie never hurt anyone.)

I like this.

 

[Miss sofia]

I like this.

This is an approach i have used. Just be direct about it, go in there and chat with her, i know it will be a cringe but better that than any awkwardness in the future. At least you will have made the first move to explain yourself. Schmooze, look as if it has been bothering you, tell the white lie like C-Dot said, whatever gets the conversation over and done with!

 

[C-dot]

This is an approach i have used. Just be direct about it, go in there and chat with her, i know it will be a cringe but better that than any awkwardness in the future. At least you will have made the first move to explain yourself. Schmooze, look as if it has been bothering you, tell the white lie like C-Dot said, whatever gets the conversation over and done with!

Exactly! If you stroke the person's ego a little, they won't feel hurt, and the awkwardness won't factor in.

 

[Louise Anne]

Is there a manager/owner in the salon, if there is pop in and have a word with him or her, they will want to keep your custom so might be able to fix it so you get person you want, also they would not awant the stylist to fall out with each other so migh make up an excuse why you are changing o ver if only for an easy salon life.

 

[Miss sofia]

That's a good idea Paul.

As Christmas is coming up perhaps take a small gift and give it to your original stylist to share out with all the girls, but make a point of giving it to her. I always take a gift for my hairdresser and the juniors, usually a tin of something, biscuits or sweets perhaps. As C-dot said it's about stroking the ego and i'm not averse to that at all in tricky situations, especially where i know someones feelings could get hurt!

 

[ginfizz]

I work in a salon and this happens sometimes. I have regular clients that used to be my coworkers regulars and vice versa. In general the clients don't really say anything to me or the girl they're cheating with me on. If it makes you feel better to say something then I'd say do it, but otherwise it just kinda happens sometimes and we all understand it. I really wouldn't worry about it too much.

In fact, if I were O I personally wouldn't want you to say anything to me, it would just make me feel awkward. We all have different styles and some people work better with other hairdressers, but if someone were to try to tell me that even in the most eloquent way and it sounded like an excuse I wouldn't appreciate it.

I seem to be the minority here, but I figured I'd give you a different perspective.

 

[PrettySquareGal]

I appreciate that, ginfizz.

The good news is that I have at least 6 weeks to decide how to proceed!

 

[crwritt]

I work in a salon and this happens sometimes. I have regular clients that used to be my coworkers regulars and vice versa. In general the clients don't really say anything to me or the girl they're cheating with me on. If it makes you feel better to say something then I'd say do it, but otherwise it just kinda happens sometimes and we all understand it. I really wouldn't worry about it too much.

In fact, if I were O I personally wouldn't want you to say anything to me, it would just make me feel awkward. We all have different styles and some people work better with other hairdressers, but if someone were to try to tell me that even in the most eloquent way and it sounded like an excuse I wouldn't appreciate it.

I seem to be the minority here, but I figured I'd give you a different perspective.

Here I was starting to feel shallow, for suggesting that no explanation was necessary. Hairstylists perform a service. When it comes out well, I go back for more. When its not quite right, and someone else does better, I don't think its cheating to switch stylists. Nothing personal.

 

[Miss sofia]

Actually i feel shallow now for suggesting talking to the stylist!! I just hate thinking i have hurt smeones feelings. But yes, thanks for your perspective on this matter Ginfizz.

 

[Louise Anne]

I do not think it shallow Miss sofia, it depends a lot on the community you live in large cities can be different to smaller towns, it dose not mean people are ruder or not, just different ways of doing things to get the same outcome.

 

[crwritt]

Miss sofia, you are the opposite of shallow.I guess its would depend on how personally close you are to the stylist. They act like best friends, chatting with you and
fixing your hair. It is possible to get emotionally attached, but really, you are there to get your hair done, and its your money,
it should be done to your liking.

 

[Miss sofia]

Bless you missis! I do live in a small town and so i guess that probably did influence my decision as inevitably i run into my stylist all over the place. But you are right, at the end of the day they are providing a service, as Ginfizz said, they are used to it, but i am just a softy and as i said probably think to much about these things and worry about people's feelings being hurt.

 

[Land-O-LakesGal]

My husband is a Barber and clients do occasionally switch barbers my husband does sometimes comment to me if he hasn't seen a regular for a while but he also understands that there are many reasons why people go with a different Barber and doesn't take it personally. But I can also feel your pain as my stylist of the last few years does great at my color did fabulous betty page bangs but she doesn't seem to get the middy. I am thinking of switching but feel terribly guilty as she just moved to her own saloon, so I feel bad ditching her now.

 

[Amy Jeanne]

I'd say, its your hair and your wallet. If "G" does it better, more to your liking, stay with her. No need to explain.
"G" may have spent more time with you to steal you away from "O", and guess what? It worked.

I agree with this. No need to explain anything. Your head, your wallet, your decision!

 

[ginfizz]

I do live in a small town and so i guess that probably did influence my decision

And I live in a big city, so that probably influences mine.

 

[HadleyH]

I have been with my current hair stylist for a few years. I was happy with her for a while but the last few cuts I haven't loved. I thought about finding a new one, but the last time I went through that kind of transition I ended up with someone who gave me a mullet. :eeek: So I'm not very confident about striking out on my own that way.

So last week, I'll call her "O", cut my hair and this time I was downright unhappy (I never really know until I get home and wash & style for a few days). I decided to call her and see if she could redo it, and maybe she could make it right. She wasn't available but another stylist was. Rather than wait for "O" to return in a couple of days I had "G" cut and style my hair.

Wow!

She is so much nicer. She spent twice as long with me. I am thrilled with the cut!

But they work in the same salon!!!

Is there a graceful way for me to break up with "O" and start seeing "G"?

That situation you are/were in is one of my worst nightmares!

I simply could not do it I would be most embarrassed, as I say, a horrible, nightmarish situation!

I would had to find a different hair salon altogether.