"How Could You?"

[doghouse]

How Could You?
by Jim Willis

When I was a puppy, I entertained you with my antics and made you laugh. You called me your child, and despite a number of chewed shoes and a couple of murdered throw pillows, I became your best friend. Whenever I was "bad," you'd shake your finger at me and ask, "How could you?" -- but then you'd relent and roll me over for a belly rub.

My housebreaking took a little longer than expected, because you were terribly busy, but we worked on that together. I remember those nights of nuzzling you in bed and listening to your confidences and secret dreams, and I believed that life could not be any more perfect.

We went for long walks and runs in the park, car rides, stops for ice cream (I only got the cone because "ice cream is bad for dogs" you said), and I took long naps in the sun waiting for you to come home at the end of the day.

Gradually, you began spending more time at work and on your career, and more time searching for a human mate. I waited for you patiently, comforted you through heartbreaks and disappointments, never chided you about bad decisions, and romped with glee at your homecomings, and when you fell in love.

She, now your wife, is not a "dog person" -- still I welcomed her into our home, tried to show her affection, and obeyed her. I was happy because you were happy. Then the human babies came along and I shared your excitement. I was fascinated by their pinkness, how they smelled, and I wanted to mother them, too. Only she and you worried that I might hurt them, and I spent most of my time banished to another room, or to a dog crate.

Oh, how I wanted to love them, but I became a "prisoner of love." As they began to grow, I became their friend. They clung to my fur and pulled themselves up on wobbly legs, poked fingers in my eyes, investigated my ears, and gave me kisses on my nose. I loved everything about them and their touch -- because your touch was now so infrequent -- and I would've defended them with my life if need be. I would sneak into their beds and listen to their worries and secret dreams, and together we waited for the sound of your car in the driveway.

There had been a time, when others asked you if you had a dog, that you produced a photo of me from your wallet and told them stories about me. These past few years, you just answered "yes" and changed the subject. I had gone from being "your dog" to "just a dog," and you resented every expenditure on my behalf. Now, you have a new career opportunity in another city, and you and they will be moving to an apartment that does not allow pets. You've made the right decision for your "family," but there was a time when I was your only family.

I was excited about the car ride until we arrived at the animal shelter. It smelled of dogs and cats, of fear, of hopelessness. You filled out the paperwork and said, "I know you will find a good home for her." They shrugged and gave you a pained look. T hey understand the realities facing a middle-aged dog, even one with "papers." You had to pry your son's fingers loose from my collar, as he screamed, "No, Daddy! Please don't let them take my dog!" And I worried for him, and what lessons you had just taught him about friendship and loyalty, about love and responsibility, and about respect for all life.

You gave me a good-bye pat on the head, avoided my eyes, and politely refused to take my collar and leash with you. You had a deadline to meet and now I have one, too. After you left, the two nice ladies said you probably knew about your upcoming move months ago and made no attempt to find me another good home. They shook their heads and asked, "How could you?"

They are as attentive to us here in the shelter as their busy schedules allow. They feed us, of course, but I lost my appetite days ago. At first, whenever anyone passed my pen, I rushed to the front, hoping it was you that you had changed your mind -- that this was all a bad dream... or I hoped it would at least be someone who cared, anyone who might save me. When I realized I could not compete with the frolicking for attention of happy puppies, oblivious to their own fate, I retreated to a far corner and waited.

I heard her footsteps as she came for me at the end of the day, and I padded along the aisle after her to a separate room. A blissfully quiet room. She placed me on the table and rubbed my ears, and told me not to worry. My heart pounded in anticipation of what was to come, but there was also a sense of relief. The prisoner of love had run out of days. As is my nature, I was more concerned about her. The burden which she bears weighs heavily on her, and I know that, the same way I knew your every mood. She gently placed a tourniquet around my foreleg as a tear ran down her cheek. I licked her hand in the same way I used to comfort you so many years ago. She expertly slid the hypodermic needle into my vein. As I felt the sting and the cool liquid coursing through my body, I lay down sleepily, looked into her kind eyes and murmured, "How could you?"

Perhaps because she understood my dog speak, she said, "I'm so sorry." She hugged me, and hurriedly explained it was her job to make sure I went to a better place, where I wouldn't be ignored or abused or abandoned, or have to fend for myself -- a place of love and light so very different from this earthly place. And with my last bit of energy, I tried to convey to her with a thump of my tail that my "How could you?" was not directed at her.

It was directed at you, My Beloved Master, I was thinking of you. I will think of you and wait for you forever. May everyone in your life continue to show you so much loyalty.


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A Note from the Author: If "How Could You?" brought tears to your eyes as You read it, as it did to mine as I wrote it, it is because it is the composite story of the millions of formerly "owned" pets who die each year in American & Canadian animal shelters.

Anyone is welcome to distribute the essay for a noncommercial purpose, as long as it is properly attributed with the copyright notice. Please use it to help educate, on your websites, in newsletters, on animal shelter and vet office bulletin boards. Tell the public that the decision to add a pet to the family is an important one for life, that animals deserve our love and sensible care, that finding another appropriate home for your animal is your responsibility and any local humane society or animal welfare league can offer you good advice, and that all life is precious. Please do your part to stop the killing, and encourage all spay & neuter campaigns in order to prevent unwanted animals.

 

[Shearer]

Ahhh, I've read that before and I can't read it again! There's one like that about Greyhounds floating around too. They all just kill me.

Irresponsible pet owners... if your goldfish has gone belly-up don't replace it with another animal.

 

[Marc Chevalier]

You touched me with this. In other countries, dogs are simply abandoned to the streets and the countryside; their fate is equally bad, if not worse.


I saw many of these dogs in Chile. The poor there keep dogs as security against house robbers. These security dogs have puppies, and the owners try to give them away or sell them. Most are not taken, and end up being abandoned.


Abandoned puppies and dogs form into packs and wander the alleys and sidewalks of downtown Santiago, where they catch horribe diseases and end up looking like scabby zombies; they cross the freeways en masse ...and get hit by cars en masse; they are ripped apart by rottweilers and pitbulls that have themselves been thrown out. Dogcatchers round them up into caged pickups, take them out of the city, and shoot them. Their bones are ground up into fertilizer.


Strangely enough, most of these street dogs are gentle with humans. I never saw or heard of one attacking a person.


All this in a country whose people supposedly 'love' dogs (and hate cats). Very sad!

.

 

[Paisley]

As a dog owner, I don't know how you could abandon your dog. When my dog was so sick I thought he'd have to be put down, I was beside myself with grief. (My dog is doing much better now--he's outlived his oncologist's expectations by 10 months now.)

But considering how many people dump their spouses and kids to pursue someone they like better and start a new family, I guess I shouldn't be surprised that they'd dump the dog, too.

 

[vonwotan]

I can't understand how anyone could give up their dogs either, much less give them up to a shelter. We lost one of our dogs a few weeks ago after a long stuggle with several health issues.

Max was with us for more than twelve years and we still can't get used to him not being here when we get home. Heidi, our other Weim, is also a bit distressed. Without the two of us flanking her on our walks she is nervous where she used to be protective and she won't let me cross the apartment without following or finding a place to settle in nearby.

 

[Senator Jack]

When I was with my ex, we did a lot of rescue work for dogs and cats. Luckily, through our connections, we were able to get them adopted or at least placed into no-kill shelters, but it broke my heart every time I had to go in there. You could see that all the dogs just wanted to go home with somebody - anybody - and I had to restrain myself from taking home more than I came with.

I can't understand how adults (supposed adults) never seem to think about the work it takes to own a dog when they buy one, and I mean 'buy one' because I couldn't believe how many purebreeds I used to see in the shelters. Thanks to the film '101 Dalamatians' a few years back, people suddenly got it into their heads that they had to have a dalmatian. Within a year, the shelters were filled with them. They're an energetic breed and owners didn't think to read up on them before purchase. I recall that more than a few shelters wouldn't take them any more because no one would adopt them. Sad.

I have one bit advice for any one who has a cat or dog that needs a home: always charge. Even if it's a stray, charge $50. If someone isn't willing to pay a few bucks for a pet, he's not going to be a good owner, and the animal will probably end up in a shelter.

Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[Miss Match]

A friend of mine rescues abused dogs, and recently had a dog whose name was Rusty. Rusty was a little dear, but when he came to live with her he was a very sad dog. He had no concept of how to play, and was very withdrawn. But he learned that rubber squeaky balls are AWESOME, people give good scratches, and was placed with a family. Yay! My friend then got another dog to look after. Once that dog was placed, she should have got a third dog, right?

Wrong. She got Rusty back. The family that he had been placed with had taken him to the vet to be put down. Not because he was sick, or even that he had personality problems. No. They were going to kill him because their daughter was allergic. The rescue group would have taken the dog back- obviously, because they did. But they had NO PROBLEM with killing this poor little puppy. Luckily the rescue group was informed, and Rusty was re-rescued.

Pets are people, too.

 

[Elaina]

My cat was one of those they got tired of. 6 months and I got my cat to be a part of the family. Psycho as he is, he's a good cat.

I want a dog. However, whatever the shelters say, adopting one is not all that easy. I've been trying for a few months now to get a small dog. I've been rejected because I just bought a house, didn't have a fence, had cats, had a child, had my cat at the vet for a urinary tract problem and then refused to sign a contract stating that if they found someone better suited I could lose the dog. I've had animal rights people in my home, letters from my vet, an animal rescue, and the people I got my cats from, and it's not good enough.

So, I've tried papers and craigslist. But the thing is, they want you to pay more then the shelters do. And I simply refuse to pay someone for abandoning their pet because it takes too much time. I'm not going to reward anyone for taking the dog off their hands. It's my problem, but it's there anyway. Why pay $300 for a dog no one wants, they just want the money for? Better they go to a non-kill shelter then give anyone a dime for treating an animal that way.

So..a dog I don't have. It is often NOT from people willing to take them, there's so much red tape in getting one from the pounds here, so much greed, that I do not have a dog. And then these shelters are wondering why people aren't getting animals, and why the turnaround for an average pet is something like 4 owners.

While I understand re-homing fees, I'm not giving ANY individual a dime for an animal. It should go to the shelters where it will do SOME good. I've given strays away for free, but I've always checked back on them for a while, and always said if anything happens, I'd take them back. And that 50 bucks you're asking for, is the animal's first visit to a vet, and part of their spay/neuter.

Sorry for the rant. This is something that has been aggrivating me for a while. Dump a dog, and make cash while you do it, because that's what's happening. And shelters aren't much better where I am.

 

[Lady Day]

Ive had my Georgia for going on 6 years. She is my best friend, who has been with me through 3 moves (and it was NOT easy finding apartments to take an 85lb dog). She is a part of my character, and I could not give her up because that would be such a scar on my humanity, I dont think I would recover.

I dont want that karma coming back. Ill keep my 'Pubby-Kisses' and her wet nose. And if a future maybe hubby dont like it, tuff cheese.

Shes got tenure. She stays.


LD

 

[Viviene]

Last March we added a third dog to our menagerie of 10 cats (abandoned and feral cats that we brought in, neutered, etc.) and our two other dogs that we got from shelters. Our newest pup is Isha, a Great Pyrenees. My husband and I have a love for big dogs.

Since we have had Isha I have had many new experiences. She took me water skiing one morning. It had been raining and we went out for our usual walk. While walking up our driveway Isha spotted some deer on "her property" and decided to chase them. I was standing on the edge of the wet grass with my sneakers on. Suddenly I was being taken water skiing on the wet grass. Now I outweigh that pup by a good 120 pounds but it was as if I was light as a feather.

Isha also loves cats. If I get up in the middle of the night I am guaranteed to see Isha lying on the floor with four or five cats cuddled up either on top of or right against her belly. She adores them and is very gentle with them. My girls adore her and she adores them.

How anyone can just basically throw away a perfectly wonderful companion is beyond me. Isha came to us through a friend of my sister's. She raises Great Pyrenees and Isha was in a shelter. Her owners dumped her there because she kept knocking over their small children. These idiots bought her as a puppy. I presume they did no research on Great Pyrenees prior to their purchase. So because someone else did not do their homework we now have another wonderful member of our family. She has been with us just a year today and I cannot imagine our family without her.

 

[Senator Jack]

While I understand re-homing fees, I'm not giving ANY individual a dime for an animal. It should go to the shelters where it will do SOME good. I've given strays away for free, but I've always checked back on them for a while, and always said if anything happens, I'd take them back. And that 50 bucks you're asking for, is the animal's first visit to a vet, and part of their spay/neuter.

I understand you're frustrated, Elaina, but no-kill shelters really do need to go through a strict screening process because if an animal is returned, that's one less stray they can take in.

Perhaps I should have clarified the fee request, though. If a person is just trying to unload their pet, he shouldn't be asking for $300. He should, however, still ask for $50, and then say 'I'm going to donate it to the shelter.'
When we were doing all that rescue, any sort of fee we would ask for didn't even make a dent in the money we were laying out in food and vet bills, so it was going right back into the resue work anyway.

Okay, so why the fee at all? The brutal truth is that there are some very horrible people out there. Puppys, small dogs and cats are used as bait to train dogs for dogfigts. They're thrown to pit bulls to make them vicious. The fee weeds out these monsters. It's a big, beautiful world we live in, isn't it?

Regards,

Senator Jack

 

[Daisy Buchanan]

Yup, this brought plenty tears to my eyes.
I know people who have given up their dogs for these exact reasons, and I think it's sick.
I had a wonderful dalmatian. I loved her with all my heart. No matter who came in and out of my life she was #1. Although she was Hemingway Jones' dog, I started taking care of her at the age of 6. I fell in love with her after the first walk we took together. When Hem and I became roommates, I cared for her as if she was my own. Carmina became part of my character. In the end she was very sick, we did everything in our power to help her, but her time to leave this earth came. She has been gone for less than a year, and not a day goes by when I don't think of her, how incredible, noble, loyal and sweet she was. She was a true companion. I couldn't imagine waking up one morning and just giving her away, for completely selfish reasons. Anyone who truly loves their pet will find a way to keep him/her. There is always a way, yeah finding it might take some effort, but it's sooo worth it.
That being said, I could never imagine just sending any animal to a shelter because family circumstance changes. This is plain old irresponsibility. It's so sad to me that such a wonderful creature can be treated so poorly, as if it's replaceable, just another dog.
I would love to get another dog, but unfortunately circumstance right now will not allow me to. Sure I could get another dog, it would be great to have the companionship. However, I know given certain things going on in my life that I can't change, getting a dog would be irresponsible and not fair to the dog. I hop someday these circumstances change so I can give a dog a loving home.
I do have 2 cats. One was ferrel and is still a bit of a nut case, the other is a sweet cuddly, very large (26 pounds) bundle of love. I got both of them at the shelter. I wish I could do more. But, like I said the timing just isn't right

 

[RetroModelSari]

It made me so sad to read the text! My Mom and I allways took the animals that no one else wanted. A cat found in a trash-can by a friend. A chihuahua that was mistreated by it´s owners children. A dog that I found in an abondaned trainstation shut in a dirty stinking room. Another dog from Africa that was highly traumatized. I can´t help it. I got to pick them up and at least find them a wonderfull new home. And even when I have found them this wonderfull home I cry like a baby cause they won´t life with me anymore.

I´m extremely sad cause I just have a tiny 1-room apartment so I can´t have a pet, but as soon me and my boyfriend have found a nice apartment we will surely pick up some cats from the animal-shelter.

 

[Pilotguy299]

please

I can't handle this stuff at work...

We adopted a small terrier mutt at the local animal shelter when our youngest was 3. within five days she (Abby the dog) was very sick so we took her to a vet. The vet told us she had parvo and suggested we take her back to the shelter for them to "deal with". well, that didn't go over too well with us.

we went to the pound and let them know about it, and after some prodding were told that Abby's mother and siblings had fallen sick as well and were put to sleep so other animals wouldn't fall sick too and that they were willing take her back and do the same...

we ended up spending about $1,500 to treat our $65 pound puppy and thankfully Abby's still with us 13 years and 2 more children later.

 

[Shearer]

Yup, this brought plenty tears to my eyes.
I know people who have given up their dogs for these exact reasons, and I think it's sick.
I had a wonderful dalmatian. I loved her with all my heart. No matter who came in and out of my life she was #1. Although she was Hemingway Jones' dog, I started taking care of her at the age of 6. I fell in love with her after the first walk we took together. When Hem and I became roommates, I cared for her as if she was my own. Carmina became part of my character. In the end she was very sick, we did everything in our power to help her, but her time to leave this earth came. She has been gone for less than a year, and not a day goes by when I don't think of her, how incredible, noble, loyal and sweet she was. She was a true companion. I couldn't imagine waking up one morning and just giving her away, for completely selfish reasons. Anyone who truly loves their pet will find a way to keep him/her. There is always a way, yeah finding it might take some effort, but it's sooo worth it.
That being said, I could never imagine just sending any animal to a shelter because family circumstance changes. This is plain old irresponsibility. It's so sad to me that such a wonderful creature can be treated so poorly, as if it's replaceable, just another dog.
I would love to get another dog, but unfortunately circumstance right now will not allow me to. Sure I could get another dog, it would be great to have the companionship. However, I know given certain things going on in my life that I can't change, getting a dog would be irresponsible and not fair to the dog. I hop someday these circumstances change so I can give a dog a loving home.
I do have 2 cats. One was ferrel and is still a bit of a nut case, the other is a sweet cuddly, very large (26 pounds) bundle of love. I got both of them at the shelter. I wish I could do more. But, like I said the timing just isn't right

Daisy, your post brought a tear to my eye! I'm sorry about the loss of your dalmation.
I grew up with lots of animals but I've always been more of a dog lover. My sister's dog, Garbo, who I see every day and have known since she was a puppy, developed a brain tumor this year (She's an 11 year old Chesapeake). My sister is lucky enough to be in a place right now where she could afford to treat it. Garbo had brain surgery to remove the tumor and was doing great until a routine ultrasound revealed she now has cancer in another part of her body.
I don't expect everyone to go to such extremes as brain surgery with their animals because I know now just how expensive it is. However, what you said about your dalmation always being number one in your life struck a note. Dogs will always put their humans number one, from the moment you first bring them home, till their last days. Once you develop that bond with them, they trust you no matter what.
If you have a dog, you know what I'm talking about. Just look into those big, liquid eyes and you can see it!
Any rate, I'm rambling, but I'm glad to see there's so many animal lovers here! :eusa_clap

 

[PrettySquareGal]

I have guinea pigs from the shelter, and sponsor a cage.

 

[Mojito]

All part of the frustrating phenomena of the 'disposable pet'. Get tired of it? Discard it. Dump it, put it down, whatever. Either because it was merely a fashionable accessory in the first place that requires too much effort or has habits or acquired behavioural problems that are just too, too tiresome, or because the owner did not do their research or think enough about the responsibility they were taking on in the first place.

I currently keep tropical fish - and tropical fish, only. They are the only animal suitable to my current lifestyle. Elements of the aquarium trade are very unfortunate - there's a despicable tendency with some to treat fish as disposable. I still see Moorish Idols, for example, sold in pet stores, in spite of the fact that these fish have no chance of surviving, and will slowly starve to death.

My parents would not let us have dogs or cats as children, because every few years we went overseas on diplomatic postings and Australia's quarantine laws meant it was extremely difficult to bring them back into the country. This was in spite of the fact that they both adored animals. When we were older, we were allowed rescue dogs. We also worked in Singapore with a government appointed vet on rehousing and rehabilitating smuggled exotic birds like hornbills and palm cockatoos that had been dumped when they became injured or ill.

Horses, too - one of ours was a tragic rescue case with a happy ending, as a rack of bones became a happy, healthy, endearing member of the family.

Retromodelsari, we also had a rescued chihuahua. A scruffy, belligerant ratbag of a creature...who had every reason to be that way. He'd been found by my cousin wandering abandoned by the side of the freeway - starving, his teeth half kicked in and with a hatred and fear of most men. He lived a long life with us, defiant and somehow rakishly charming to the end, and affectionate in his own funny way.

 

[Viola]

Right now we have three cats, one who wandered into the yard hungry and on three legs, one who was found in a dumpster, and one who was found at the subway terminal about to get hit by a bus. The cats are now ten, nine, and two years old.

We also have two dogs, an Akita from the shelter who was a purebred dying of kennel cough because the shelter wouldn't medicate before they knew he'd be placed, and a pit-mix a guy I know couldn't keep anymore because he had no time for her.

Aside from one cat being quite abusive to the dogs, they get along okay. And the youngest cat thinks the Akita is nearly godly, and he always shares his treats with her because she kisses up to him and makes him feel important.lol

-Viola

 

[Elaina]

I understand you're frustrated, Elaina, but no-kill shelters really do need to go through a strict screening process because if an animal is returned, that's one less stray they can take in.

Perhaps I should have clarified the fee request, though. If a person is just trying to unload their pet, he shouldn't be asking for $300. He should, however, still ask for $50, and then say 'I'm going to donate it to the shelter.'
When we were doing all that rescue, any sort of fee we would ask for didn't even make a dent in the money we were laying out in food and vet bills, so it was going right back into the resue work anyway.

Okay, so why the fee at all? The brutal truth is that there are some very horrible people out there. Puppys, small dogs and cats are used as bait to train dogs for dogfigts. They're thrown to pit bulls to make them vicious. The fee weeds out these monsters. It's a big, beautiful world we live in, isn't it?

Regards,

Senator Jack

Well, I'd buy the screening process, except I've been a foster home for several shelters for a number of years (I have had everything from wild animals to mundane pets), and right now I have a foster parakeet that goes to a home tomorrow. It boils down to money: they don't think we make enough income. But I should point out that I was contacted by another area Humane Society shelter today who has pretty much said I should never have been denied any animal based on what I was denied for. The only thing questionable I do say is that I feel an animal has a job in the family, and not to be a cute, useless thing. I expect my cats to hunt mice if I have them, and I expect a dog to bark if someone is at my door (it's not unrealistic, but I've been argued with over that point.) So, frankly, coming in with refrences from fostering, my vet, even the recods of adoption of past pets (vet, adoption records, vet death certificate) and never once have I returned an animal...and I get denied for buying a house or not having a fence for a small house dog? Cats, kids...I can understand that, for certain dogs. But the economics? Not on your life. My husband has pet insurance through his job, it's not even the vet bills. Heck, I was denied FOR taking my elderly cat to the vet, and denied for leash training my cats.

Now, if I was asked to write a check or give a money order to go to a shelter, I'd have less problems, but most of the time the animal hasn't seen a vet, isn't altered and someone wants to be paid back for giving you a dog. And reasonable homing fees seem to be $150 here (which is twice what most shelters charge.)

And to be quite honest, the last dog I had fostered was a really grumpy, really old shar-pei. I was the 5th foster home (he had an attitude) and he was working on finding his 6th owner at the time, and I got dog bit more then once. Someone paid alot of money for him, and he had rehoming fees (the paper trail showed he was paid for, and all the rehoming fees were paid)...and it didn't stop any of them from dumping him, blinding him in one eye, letting his nails grow to the point his foot was amuptated, having all kinds of worms and having mange so bad, I don't think I have seen anything more pathethic then this dog. So, it's good in theory, but frankly, people still are going to abuse an animal reguardless of payment, and $20, $50 or $500 isn't going to change that. Go walk into any shelter and you're as likely to see a purebred as a mutt. And puppy mills are full of dogs they paid for. I've gotten into this argument with PETA, and I'm not changing my mind, but then, neither is anyone else. I simply don't believe paying for an animal is going to cause people to take better care of it. They will or they won't, and rich people are as likely to abuse their kids and pets as a poor person. And pounds are full of animals that can be used to train pits too.

And before you ask why I didn't keep this dog, he died (yes, while in my care) from heartworms, which I was taking care of. After that, fostering a dog just isn't something I want to do anymore.

So..this is one point you and I will have to disagree apon.

 

[Benny Holiday]

Heartbreaking

Simply heartbreaking to read. I've had three dogs as my dear friends since I was born, and all have had wonderful lives full of fun and love. I miss Sandy and Prince, who both lived to the age of 13, and my beloved Daddy-o is now 12. I can't imagine life without him. I can't understand how anyone could hurt or abandon a dog or any other animal.